I Never Promised You an Apple Orchard

by Charles M. Schulz

Writings

Genres: Comics, Childrens, Humor, Fiction

64 pages, Mass Market Paperback

First published January 1, 1976

About the author

Charles Monroe Schulz was an American cartoonist, whose comic strip Peanuts proved one of the most popular and influential in the history of the medium, and is still widely reprinted on a daily basis.
Schulz's first regular cartoons, Li'l Folks, were published from 1947 to 1950 by the St. Paul Pioneer Press; he first used the name Charlie Brown for a character there, although he applied the name in four gags to three different boys and one buried in sand. The series also had a dog that looked much like Snoopy. In 1948, Schulz sold a cartoon to The Saturday Evening Post; the first of 17 single-panel cartoons by Schulz that would be published there. In 1948, Schulz tried to have Li'l Folks syndicated through the Newspaper Enterprise Association. Schulz would have been an independent contractor for the syndicate, unheard of in the 1940s, but the deal fell through. Li'l Folks was dropped from the Pioneer Press in January, 1950.
Later that year, Schulz approached the United Feature Syndicate with his best strips from Li'l Folks, and Peanuts made its first appearance on October 2, 1950. The strip became one of the most popular comic strips of all time. He also had a short-lived sports-oriented comic strip called It's Only a Game (1957–1959), but he abandoned it due to the demands of the successful Peanuts. From 1956 to 1965 he contributed a single-panel strip ("Young Pillars") featuring teenagers to Youth, a publication associated with the Church of God.
Peanuts ran for nearly 50 years, almost without interruption; during the life of the strip, Schulz took only one vacation, a five-week break in late 1997. At its peak, Peanuts appeared in more than 2,600 newspapers in 75 countries. Schulz stated that his routine every morning consisted of eating a jelly donut and sitting down to write the day's strip. After coming up with an idea (which he said could take anywhere from a few minutes to a few hours), he began drawing it, which took about an hour for dailies and three hours for Sunday strips. He stubbornly refused to hire an inker or letterer, saying that "it would be equivalent to a golfer hiring a man to make his putts for him." In November 1999 Schulz suffered a stroke, and later it was discovered that he had colon cancer that had metastasized. Because of the chemotherapy and the fact he could not read or see clearly, he announced his retirement on December 14, 1999.
Schulz often touched on religious themes in his work, including the classic television cartoon, A Charlie Brown Christmas (1965), which features the character Linus van Pelt quoting the King James Version of the Bible Luke 2:8-14 to explain "what Christmas is all about." In personal interviews Schulz mentioned that Linus represented his spiritual side. Schulz, reared in the Lutheran faith, had been active in the Church of God as a young adult and then later taught Sunday school at a United Methodist Church. In the 1960s, Robert L. Short interpreted certain themes and conversations in Peanuts as being consistent with parts of Christian theology, and used them as illustrations during his lectures about the gospel, as he explained in his bestselling paperback book, The Gospel According to Peanuts, the first of several books he wrote on religion and Peanuts, and other popular culture items. From the late 1980s, however, Schulz described himself in interviews as a "secular humanist": “I do not go to church anymore... I guess you might say I've come around to secular humanism, an obligation I believe all humans have to others and the world we live in.”

Reviews

[Noninuna · Rating 4 out of 5]

Aw, Snoopy!! How terrible he is as a writer but still thinks he had written a masterpiece. If you're familiar with Peanuts and how 'good' his writing is, you'd read this expecting for bad writing and laugh it off. But if you're not, don't jump in with this book. I won't recommend because you'll miss all the jokes about it...

[Inggita · Rating 4 out of 5]

a book of puns and witticism of His Audacity Snoopy who aspires to be a writer - sometimes under the direction of the wise Woodstock and under intense criticism of Her Harshness Lucy. about a dozen years after i got it i finally "got" it - so tragically funny.

[Michael P. · Rating 4 out of 5]

Literary dogs are rare and wonderful, and so is this book.

[Edward Sojuwa · Rating 4 out of 5]

World renowned author Eric "Snoopy" Beagle has stunned the world with his crisp intelligent writing! (The world has yet to fully recover from the nasty aftershock! The novel's of Snoopy are that stunning. Blah!) And now you can own the compleat second volume of his writings (for which Charles Schulz takes full credit) capturing the wit and the bravado of this eclectic and fascinating.... dog. (Actually his wit IS his bravado, for only a beagle could write something as dumb as the Dark and Stormy Night, now made into an epic film from director Alan Smithee! PS : April Fool late!!!) You will get the complete and uncut edition of his all time classic of the Frozen North: Toodle-oo Caribou! Joe and Joe are the two lovers of one woman, Sally, the Caribou Queen! (Okay, bad 80s song reference pun) Sally must decide between the two Joes and her life and career as a woman in the tennis circuit. As she Lobs for life as the next Billie Jean, and not THEIR lover, (oops) can the Joes patch up their differences and find laughter and JOE-COSITY and JOE-STIFICATION in their friendship? It's an action packed masterpiece of love, family, and snowy tundra. So then, Snoopy fans, what would YOU do for this kinda Klondike Bar? (Or NOT!) Snoopy is as funny and full of himself as ever. He never did promise you an over sweet apple orchard....just a rose garden with less prickles!
Four stars
A light and stormless addition to the Peanuts Canon....loaded and ready to fire!

[Nikki Auten · Rating 4 out of 5]

I think Schultz was a very mature children’s writer and so it made the children who read his books more mature. He doesn’t childproof the conversations or dumb down the dialogue, which I appreciate.

Slipping between Snoopy’s thoughts, and then his writing was tactfully done.

I liked reading Snoop’s journey through the creation process of his story as well as the story he wrote. It’s almost like you got two books in one.
I only gave it four stars, because the jokes were too outdated for comprehension or context.

[Julianne · Rating 4 out of 5]

Oh Snoopy, you're so punny.

[Barbara Bengston · Rating 4 out of 5]

I bought this book around 1978 and have enjoyed reading it periodically throughout the years. I enjoyed the puns in this book, and still chuckle when I read it.

[Tom Schulte · Rating 2 out of 5]

This feels like a sad collection of puns and groan-inducing wordplay assembled from Charles M. Schulz's wastebasket.

[Andie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Cute! Many of Snoopy's writings compiled into one hardcover book. Perfect for a light-hearted sitting.

[MK · Rating 5 out of 5]

As a writer, I read this book as if I were the main character.
Snoopy's picture books always take the stress out of our daily lives.

[Emma · Rating 3 out of 5]

Cute little story

[K · Rating 3 out of 5]

4 for toodle-oo, caribou

[Sara · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is absolutely stellar. If he had been writing now, I'm pretty sure Snoopy could have gotten published in a lot of good online lit mags at least.

[Never · Rating 5 out of 5]

Funny and witty!

[Karen · Rating 5 out of 5]

I mean, it's Snoopy, how many stars did you think I would give it?

[Olivia · Rating 2 out of 5]

Mildly amusing puns.