A Love That Multiplies: An Up-Close View of How They Make it Work

by Michelle Duggar, Jim Bob Duggar

In this second book from the Duggars, they focus on the principles that equip them to face life's challenges—drawing from their most recent challenge with the 3-month premature birth of their newest child, Josie. They also share the new challenges their older children are facing as they prepare for adult life. Central to the book is a section on the principles that the Duggars have consistently taught their children. These simply worded principles are basic to the Duggar family and are shared in a way that other parents can incorporate in their own homes. A special chapter on homeschooling gives valuable information to parents who are considering this route or are already invested in it. The world continues to be amazed by their nineteen well-groomed, well-behaved, well-schooled children and their home life, which focuses on family, financial responsibility, fun—and must importantly, faith. The Duggars show how parents can succeed whether they’re rearing a single child or several.

Genres: Nonfiction, Parenting, Christian, Biography, Memoir, Religion, Inspirational

288 pages, Hardcover

First published January 1, 2011

About the author

Best known for her television show "19 Kids and Counting," which documents the lives of the Duggar family, Michelle Duggar is a mother of nearly 20 children. She is a very spiritual person and often credits her successes to God. She is married to Jim Bob Duggar.

Reviews

[CS]

This is what a pedophile looks like

NOTE: This review space does NOT have a rating for the book, as I haven't read it and never will. It is to keep track of the hypocrisy of this "virtuous" family who oppose people using public bathrooms and consenting adults loving each other in consensual ways, but are OK with their son non-consensually touching his sisters and possessing child *photos*. I will delete comments as necessary.

Initial 2015 Update: The Duggars have always bothered me with their massive family and "the older kids help raise the younger kids" thing. What a way to grow up - always taking care of a younger sibling! That sounds like a great childhood, don't cha think???

But now that it's been revealed that Josh sexually molested five girls including FOUR of HIS OWN SISTERS in what his parents call "teenaged mistakes". I first heard about it from Libby Anne herself. The bottom of that article, she lists several other links to other blogs, talking about the Josh Duggar case. She more recently linked to a video that kinda recaps what happened and talks about the hypocrisy of this family.

InTouch Weekly first released the news about a week ago.

It took awhile, but TLC has suspended the show and financiers are dropping out rapidly. However, there is talk that the show will "go on", minus Josh himself.

Link 1

Link 2

Link 3

Link 4

UPDATE: It gets worse

UPDATE: Last night, Megyn Kelly of Fox News interviewed Jim Bob and Michelle. Not surprising, they minimized Josh's offense ("the girls were asleep and didn't know until we told them!") and outright lied in some places.

UPDATE: Jessa and Jill are two of the victims. They are supposed to have an interview, but early remarks from Jessa indicate that she still supports her brother. I'm not really surprised, given the environment they live in.

UPDATE: So, apparently 911 was called for one of the kids, but the Arkansas Department of Human Services was denied access to the child in question. I'm not surprised; homeschooled kids are drilled to fear the CPS.

UPDATE: IT'S ABOUT FREAKING TIME!!!

UPDATE: More good old fashioned hyposcrisy!

UPDATED: The drama continues! Danica Dillon, the porn star Josh Duggar paid to have sex with, is suing Josh Duggar for sexual assault..

UPDATE: And amongst all the horrific things Josh Duggar has done, let's ignore his criminal offenses and agonize over whether it's modest FOR A FREAKING BABY to wear pants.

UPDATE: Having family problems? Babies make everything better!

UPDATE: He's back!!!! And this time, he's joining his sisters in suing the police and InTouch for publishing the fact he molested 4 girls. Poor widdle white boy who can't keep his hands to himself!

UPDATE: Josh Duggar strikes again. I found a timeline of events to share in case this whole yarn gets confusing.

UPDATE: I haven't posted many updates since there have basically been everywhere. But THIS is justice. We need to be uncovering more of this and not letting abusers in ANY faith practice get away with harm to children!

Oddly enough, as I found that to update this review, I also found that Jana ended up in the news for something completely unrelated but also about a minor.

This group of people love to say things about children, how amazing they are and how horrible abortion is for killing them - put your money where your mouth is and help the kids hurt by people like Josh and allegedly Jana!!! If you are pro-life, pro-children, you should be appalled by this abomination.

UPDATE: While I am sure he will try to appeal, justice has been partially served.

[Sarah · Rating 3 out of 5]

Am I a little embarrassed to admit that I just read this book? Yes, but I'm fessing up to it anyways. Since I am now well aware that the Duggars do not surf the web lest it "destroy souls with instant, unlimited access to all sorts of immorality" I feel safe to proceed with my review.

Just to be clear, I think this family is crazy, yet I'm strangely drawn to their tv show. I think it's my pure fascination as to why someone would want to have that many kids, and how they maintain any semblance of order in what must be the most chaotic house on the planet. I got the impression that the first book was probably more of a how it all works type of deal. I think the sole purpose of this book may have been to convert people and bring them over to the dark side of perpetual breeding.

This book is super preachy, but that was kind of to be expected. I'm getting better at overlooking these kind of things especially when some of it is laugh out loud hilarious. Like the analogy that Jim Bob uses to encourage the kids to remain "pure" for their future spouses. Comparing pre marital sex to a neighbourhood boy stealing your new bicycle that your parents were going to surprise you with and "stunt-driving it up and down the back alley" is just too much. "I'm sure you would still be grateful for the bike and you would have fun riding it, but..." Seriously, you can't make this stuff up!

I guess to each their own and I have to give credit where credit is due. The kids are obviously loved and seem to be well taken care of. You see me with 19 kids and you will also simultaneously see a 60 of Jack Daniel's in one hand and a fist full of Valium in the other and ain't nobody getting taken care of. Michelle Duggar has made it onto my fantasy dinner party list. If not only to see what makes her tick, but to force feed this poor woman a glass bottle or two of wine.

[Annemarie Donahue · Rating 1 out of 5]

I just can't wrap my head around this. My grandmother had 16 children (no multiple births) but it wasn't to replenish, my grandparents were just old school Catholics who evidently really liked sex. More power to you.
But I was DEEPLY offended by the comparison to a bicycle. I was not aware that women were property and should be handled that way. Yeah, I'm reading this a little too literally, but then maybe I'm reallly not. I mean, "don't let anyone else ride your bike" it's like finger nails on a chalk board. I can't have these people at my fantasy dinner party, Hemingway would murder them and Wilde would make them cry.

[Stephanie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Admittedly, the first third of the book had me in tears. Most of the beginning of Michelle and Jim Bob’s second book deals with the scary circumstances surrounding Josie’s birth and the difficulties of a preemie in the following months. My situation wasn’t the same, but my husband and I lost our first baby boy at 26 weeks, and the Duggars’ story reminded me of that frightening time in my own life.

Even if you’ve watched only one episode of the Duggars, you will quickly realize that their convictions are not popular. Jim Bob, Michelle, and their children are very open and forthright about their strong biblical standards. In A Love That Multiplies, they tell the reader over and over again that they believe children are a precious gift from the Lord.

Early in their marriage, Jim Bob and Michelle gave God complete control over how many children they would have, and they have never wavered from that decision, despite nasty and ignorant comments from the outside world.

Throughout the entire book, I was impressed with the Duggars’ strong faith in God’s Word. Everything they do, from babies to school to work revolves around the Bible. For example, the children memorize a passage from Matthew 18, which gives the biblical steps for conflict resolution. As they memorize, they incorporate what they’ve learned into everyday life. Squabbles with sisters and brothers are to be resolved biblically.

My two favorite parts in the book were both written by Michelle. When watching the TV show, I continually wondered how she can be so calm and quiet. Even her niece remarked in one show, I’ve never heard her yell!

Well, Michelle enlightens us in the book! Apparently she used to raise her voice and lose her temper! However, during a school study on anger, one of the Bible verses she was reading to the children stood out to her – Proverbs 15:1, ‘A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger’ – and she was so convicted of her wrong behavior! She immediately asked the children to forgive her and asked the Lord to help her control her tongue.

Michelle says the Lord immediately tested her with a can of pineapple.

You’ll have to read the story yourself!

But, I was so encouraged to see that she has struggled with anger, yet with the Lord’s help has worked on having a calmer, kinder tone with her children.

I was also glad to read that Michelle felt overwhelmed with the responsibility of homeschooling. Her teachable spirit is obvious and such an encouragement to other moms, as she appears so organized and unflappable, but is truly human like each of us!

Many can admire this ‘and-counting’ family in a well-good-for-them-but-not-for-me kind of way, but true biblical faith is hard for the lost world to understand. I believe the Duggars faith and conviction can be boiled down to Matthew 6:33, ‘But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.’ If you put the Lord first in all you do, EVERYthing will fall into place.

As a Biblicist Baptist, I don't agree with several of their associations (Bill Gothard is one), but I truly admire the family's strong conservative stand overall. I really enjoyed learning more about what makes the Duggars tick. Several things were quickly mentioned that they covered in more detail in their first book, The Duggars: 20 and Counting! I think I’ll have to check that out soon!

If you're curious about that how-many-kids?! family, A Love That Multiplies is a fascinating (and recommended!) look into the Duggars’ crazy life – or ‘serene chaos,’ as Michelle says! You’ll read about Jinger’s stolen diary (!!!), the popcorn round of Memory Lane, Josh's rock business, abstinence principles they follow after childbirth, as well as delicious recipes, helpful household tips, pictures of the family, and so much more!

*I received a free review copy in exchange for an honest review. No other compensation was given, and all thoughts are 100% mine.*

[Erin · Rating 1 out of 5]

So much to say.

I hate-watch two families, the Duggars and the Kardashians. Not all the time (and I'm pro-Bruce right now) and not routinely, but I dislike but families so much that I'm absolutely fascinated by them. I realize that some of you may think I'm an awful person, and I'm OK with that.

So, I read the first Duggar book and then a friend gave me a copy of this one that she found for a dime at a thrift store. And I started reading it on May 7, just a few pages at a time.

Then, when I was on page 99, something truly surprising happened - the Josh Duggar molestation scandal came to light. Now, understand, like many I always assumed that with twenty-one Duggars (now extending to in-laws and grandchildren), SOMETHING was going to happen to bring them down.....one would break away and become an anti-fundamentalist speaker, one would get a DUI, something.

But this.

I NEVER could have imagined something like this.

And it was only for one second that I felt something like glee before I realized that there were five girls who had been violated by Josh Duggar, and then violated again by the fact that the Duggar parents and those they spoke with did nothing. It's also clear that at least some of the victims are his sisters and they have been forced to live with him, smiling, cheery and as if all was fine. This is beyond disgusting. I feel like I have to say that.

Now, so that I meet the Goodreads terms of service, my review of the book is one star for several reasons - first, but for the chapters about the birth and recovery of Josie, it's mostly a retread of the first book, even down to the use of some of the same phrases. Clearly it was just an effort to capitalize on the interest surrounding Josie.

Oh, but everything after page 99 was just fraught with irony. Even the subtitle "An Up-Close View of How They Make It Work." Ugh. And, God help us all, the chapter on sexual intimacy with one's spouse. I just can't.

Then passages like "we explain to our children the importance of maintaining a clear conscience with God and others....we encourage our children to share with us their mistakes and temptations as well as their troubling thoughts and feelings. We tell them if they've done something wrong (or a whole bunch of things) they need to confess it to God to be free from the guilt that will otherwise make them miserable. We pray together with the child, asking God to wipe the slate clean and thanking Him for the wonderful gift of forgiveness. Then they go to the person they have offended, if that kind of mistake is what's being confessed, and ask for forgiveness." (236) As much as I would like to believe someone from Fox News is going to ask good ole Jim Bob and Michelle about this, I don't see it happening.

And there are about ten more passages like this that I marked post page 99. This book was published in 2011, so not only had the original events occurred, the Oprah show had already tipped off authorities who had investigated. Did they really think that this would never come out? Were Jim Bob and Michelle so willing to sacrifice their children for money?

I never felt guilt about my hate-watching, BTW.

[Catherine J. · Rating 1 out of 5]

Stupid and insipid. I didn't think it was possible to dislike these people more (and why not, really? They certainly judge me and others like me enough. Why should I be nice to/about them?).

Really, Michelle, stop emphasising your definition of marriage. We get it. You hate the gays. I'm sure your sister is thrilled to hear it.

Are you trying to recoup all the money you've wasted on your fundie cult throughout the years by publishing this crap? That's about the only reason I can think of that you would write these books. You need to "minister" (brainwash, indoctrinate) people into joining ATI. The only way a cult stays fresh, after all, is if you indoctrinate new members and call it "religion" and "following the bible."

Two down, one to go.

[Roger Hicks · Rating 5 out of 5]

What can I say about the Duggars? Seeing their family on TV was a factor (one of many) that led my wife and I to the belief of allowing God to control how many children we had (seven so far, for the curious). For a long time that was how I thought of them: They trusted God with their fertility and it all seemed to work out well for them. We share many (though not all) conservative Christian beliefs with them, so they were a nice family on TV we could relate to.

Since reading their first book (review here: http://family.bob-space.com/2009/06/d...) my opinion of them has changed greatly. I've really developed a deep respect and admiration for this large family that strives to glorify God in everything they do and makes demonstrating God's love to others their priority. To the Duggars faith isn't about attending church religiously and putting a fish bumper-sticker on your car - it's lived out in every aspect of their lives. While their critics can bash them over "family planning" choices or conservative beliefs they can't (honestly anyway) accuse them of being stereotypical "right-wing christian hate-mongers" because they make their lives about showing respect and kindness to others - even their critics.

This second book is full of the details behind what makes their home happy and their lives joyful as seen on the TV show. Non-Christians may be turned off by the constant references to their faith, but that's really what it's all about. Their faith is what makes their family work, and it's what allows them to cheerfully live every day in a way that would make most people go insane within 15 minutes.

This book does get into some of the nitty-gritty behind how (and why) they make the decisions they make - and the results of those decisions. It also details the major events last few years of their life (a tumultuous time) and how they dealt with each situation that arose. Repeatedly they demonstrate that trusting God isn't just front to impress Christian friends, but a pattern of life (and I would suggest the only viable pattern of life that leads to true contentment).

This book is well worth the read (even if you don't subscribe to the Duggar's beliefs) simply as an example of how life can be lived to the fullest. I recommend it so highly I'm giving away copies of it on my blog - click through for a chance to get one: http://family.bob-space.com/2011/07/l...

[♥Milica♥ · Rating 2 out of 5]

Don't have much to say about this that I didn't already say in my review for their first book, but at least in this one they dropped the whole "I, Jim Bob" and "I, Michelle" thing, so it was less confusing. They repeated some stories from that other book too, but most of them were new, occasionally interesting.

I laughed when I got to that "romance books are to women what porn is to men" part and how they give girls/women unrealistic expectations...BYEEEEE. So ridiculous. Like not even "proper" historical romances Michelle? Really now?? What a sad world.

Anyway, another Duggar book done, a few more to go.

[Kara Dalton-Werner · Rating 2 out of 5]

I feel trying to portay their "micro-preemie's" stay in the NICU as almost a footnote in a tale of a trying year- was sanctimonious and condescending to parents who have had preemies. I don't doubt that the Duggar's tried to keep their trademark sunny-dispositions but would it betray their experience or negate their faith in God to admit those touch-n-go moments were dark and frightening perhaps not appropriate to be juxtaposed by a recipe on the opposite page?

The Duggar's story is interesting without sprinkling sugar on everything. I certainly am not one who watches the Duggar's unfold hoping they're secretly sordid and evil. I just cannot for a second believe that a mother who has her baby trapped in an incubator because the baby's skin has not yet even formed enough that it can be touched- is quipping about how her family is renting the house of a birth control advocate.

People look up to the Duggar's. They do their fans a disservice by withholding the complexities of their emotions and experience.

[Teena · Rating 3 out of 5]

Loved the book for the great organizational tips, parenting and financial advice. I couldn't help getting a bit annoyed when the subject of "defrauding" came up. I disagree that it's up to a woman to dress herself in a way that doesn't "stir up urges" in men. I feel that men and women both should be responsible for their own sexual thoughts. If the Duggars are so concerned, perhaps a Burka is in order? Otherwise, I respect the family and their beliefs.

[Sara · Rating 4 out of 5]

I got a lot of great homeschooling ideas from this book. I love how they teach their children about character. I've had success in my own home with some of the ideas that the Duggars have in this book. It's an easy read and easy to flip through to find what you want.

[Pamela(AllHoney) · Rating 4 out of 5]

I found this at the library and decided to check it out. I don't watch the TLC show but I've caught parts of it while surfing the channels and I admit to a weird curiosity. Also they live here in Arkansas too. Though we are in totally different parts of the state. Growing up I didn't want to be a doctor or lawyer or even an actress or singer. I wanted to be a mom. Fate chose differently for me, however. I actually enjoyed reading their beliefs and philosophies in raising their family. I think I should have read their first book though. Several times they referenced back to it. This book seem to concentrate more on the birth of their 19th child, Josie, and the struggles they had.

[Katie · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is a wonderful resource for tools on how to make a big family work. I gleaned so many inspiring parenting concepts as well as homeschooling ideas from this book. They are great examples of how to truly appreciate your children, love them, teach them (especially through biblical teachings) and all around just raise 'em the right way- which is getting increasingly more difficult in today's world! I love the Duggars!

[Alicia Willis · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a wonderful, transparent view into the Duggar's life! I have met Michelle and she is a beautiful woman, inside and out. This glimpse into their life as a family was very inspiring. I, for one, look up to Michelle as a role model and hope imitate her (while striving to imitate Christ first) when I become a wife and mother.

[JeniReadABook]

I know I torture myself by reading this shit, but I can't seem to help myself. Lol. I do have to say that this book was a little less disgusting than the last book, but I'm sure the book about courtship that the daughters wrote will more than make up for this ones palatability. Lol

I read the book then watched the seasons that corresponded with it and I have to say one thing really stuck out more than anything....I think that Michelle definitely loves Josie more than her other kids. In fact, she pretty much turned her entire families life upside down because of her favoritism. She dumped the running of the household onto her older girls shoulders completely and also insisted the entire family relocate to Little Rock. Let's face it, she didn't want to be away from her husband so she made a difficult situation even worse by her own selfishness.

She already sort of stole the children's childhoods away (the older ones cook, clean, babysit constantly while none of them are allowed to be anything other than "cheerfully" obedient) before Josie ever entered the picture. After Josie was born early the entire focus of the family shifted to that one little girl. Michelle dotes on her (which would be just fine if she were the only child, but it's totally unfair to the other children in this situation), making her needs come above every other family members. Those poor kids already get a shit deal by having to share their parents amongst so many siblings, but this is just preposterous that now the only child getting their parents undivided attention is Josie. And since Michelle has already had a miscarriage following her birth, I'm betting Miss Josie stays the baby of the family, and will probably always be treated like a little princess (again not a bad thing for a kid to get all that attention, if they were an only child it would be awesome) while the other kiddos remain second class citizens at the whim of a nutcase mom who forces the rest if the family to confirm to her latest whims.

[Kristen · Rating 4 out of 5]

I love the Duggar's. I love to read about the way they are raising their remarkable family with the goal of deliberate discipleship and a ministry mindset. They are genuinely good people. I was especially appreciative to read all the practical advice and encouragement from Michelle on raising children with joy. I have taken some of her advice on conflict resolution in the home, and her method has worked out very well for my young family. It was so endearing to read about how Michelle overcame her quick temper and learned, through God, how to "talk sweet" to her children. The character trait definition chart they use as a family fascinates me and I want to start using her methods for character building with my own children. I also love their mentality of teaching their children how to sustain themselves, how to provide for their own needs. I left, wanting to know more about how they live so frugally in this day and age, and I will definitely be going on to explore the many online resources they cited in their book. It is such a rare thing today to get a fresh perspective on raising big families. As a mother of four, I appreciate that perspective and I thank Michelle and Jim Bob for their authentic voice in a troubled world. This really was more than a memoir: it is a valuable parenting resource that I will likely turn to again and again.

[Shelleyrae at Book'd Out · Rating 2 out of 5]

I know only of the Duggar's from an article printed some time ago in a magazine just before their 19th child, Josie was born prematurely. Like many others I was amazed at the size of their family and curious as to how they 'make it work'. Their TV show isn't on in Australia (as far as I know) so this book is really my introduction to the family.
A Love That Multiplies begins with the premature birth of Josie and its affect on the family, but also explains the principles and faith that Michelle and JimBob rely on to raise their children. As conservative Christians, the family have strict faith based guidelines for behaviour and attitude. I was expecting an austere fundamentalist approach in child rearing, but that is not the case at all. The Duggar's enjoy a wide range of experiences and are encouraged to become part of the community. Michelle and JimBob both write about the hardships and joys involved in raising their family and share their perspectives of events. I found this alternating viewpoint difficult at times, the transition often seemed clumsy, indicated only by a bracketed name after the switch has already taken place. I couldn't always tell who was narrating.
Still, its fascinating to be privy to the details of raising such a large family. The sheer work involved in homeschooling, cooking and caring for a family of 21 is mind boggling, yet the parents cope with admirable patience. That they support themselves, while still giving to others is honorable. The family is not perfect, Michelle speaks briefly of the irritations she experiences and the strain of Josie's illness on her marriage. It's sort of glossed over but I appreciate the acknowledgement that they are not immune from worldly frustrations.
While I don't share their intense faith, I was able to look past the passionate preaching and admire their underlying principles of child rearing - consistency, respect, love, encouragement, support and joy. These basic tenets are ones I am raising my own four children with but these messages are at risk at being buried under the avalanche of scripture quotes and religious praise. The Duggars are open about their desire to spread their faith and God's word, but as an agnostic I skimmed the evangelicalism. I think it would appeal to less enthusiastic believers more if the Duggars shared more concrete descriptions of their interactions with their children as the subtitle implies.
A Love That Multiplies is an interesting peek into the Duggars life, I admire their commitment to each other and genuine wish to raise a loving and caring family. I've struggled with choosing a rating for the book though. As mentioned I feel the structure is clumsy, which did not make for an easy reading experience in the electronic ARC version I had access to. On reflection, I also feel that the book is light on practical content and provides only a glimpse of the workings of this huge family, but perhaps this is more fully detailed in their previous book and television show. I am going to go with 2 and a half stars.

[Jeanette · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book covers exact events of this family's 2009-2011 years. Difficult years for them because for 6 to 7 months the family had to be separated and moved to rental homes. The entire book was a delightful read (better than the first, IMHO), but the chapters and methods which considered and described parental techniques that they use were pure 5 star. The blanket training, the leading each child into dominion to their own self-control and the solving of conflict resolutions that they use- no words too superlative to describe how important that is to growing humans. The kindness and love to each other, all 21 of them- it just radiates through the pages. Rarely, rarely have I felt such sincerity coupled with pure "good intent" toward others, as evident in outcome too, as within this family. And such strength in forgiveness displayed constantly too, against the negative and nasty to them. Oh, if we could all be so loving of our enemies! They are role models for human moral values beyond the Ten Commandments, IMHO. LOVE THY NEIGHBOR AS THYSELF- not just something on a page or sampler or politico tract, with actions or words daily the opposite. And leading Christ centered lives to imitation; they magnify the intrinsic human worth to all they meet to a very high bar. And return positive endlessly, for any negative encountered alone the way. And do they get their share of that in print and media too!

I liked one of the recipes also, and find that the financial advice is as good as the mental and spiritual here, as well.

I think the eye-to-eye communication of speaking your heart about any anger or transgression or character need or flaw- and THE SURE consequence of saying you are sorry and making restitution in precise explaining of exactly what you choose to do wrong or hurtful and how you can fix it! Those actions core the priceless parts which place a specific moral value (and less than that is unacceptable). And this is the morality core to being human feature which has been nearly obliterated in our public schools. Our nuns did very much the same thing as the Duggars do daily, but often not as kindly or as loving, although many tried. It takes much patience and many words of redundancy- but what excellent human beings who give back with multiples of independent skills, do result! These skills and resourceful outcome and condition of their children today speaks for itself.

[Malinda Roland · Rating 5 out of 5]

So good! I hope I can be half the wife & mother Michelle is!

[Susan · Rating 4 out of 5]

If this book were all I knew of the Duggars, I'd like them quite a bit. It begins with ultra-preemie Josie's birth and the time surrounding it. There's also a lot on how the Duggars live and their beliefs. They admit several times that "we're not perfect," but I feel that the book really does seem to point toward them being at least very, very good. In light of all that has come out about oldest son Josh, that seems a bit disingenuous (at the time this book was written, most of Josh's transgressions had occurred, but were still unknown publicly).

For instance, there is much written about how the kids approach choosing a marriage partner. There's a long list of things the girls look for in a mate, and an equally long list of what they DON'T want. A few examples of that: self-centered, lack of self-control, ongoing moral issues (without brokenness). It struck me that their own brother would not qualify by these guidelines. Also it was interesting that the moral issues clause was mitigated by the brokenness exception, given that the Duggar parents have insisted that Josh was broken by his scandals. I had to wonder if they had him in mind when they added that exception. Barely anything was mentioned about what the boys look for in a mate -- hmmm. I wondered if Anna Duggar were their daughter, would they have encouraged her to marry Josh?

The book also discusses the sons and the possibility of them attending college. College is never mentioned for the girls, which I find sad. And we know now that none of the boys have gone, either (with the exception of Joseph, who spend a semester at Crown College). As a former teacher and a real advocate for education, one of the saddest things about the Duggars to me has been the way they scorn formal education. They mention teaching their kids "real life" skills (doing home repairs, cooking, etc), but I think there's a lot to be said for more formal education and learning.

Anyway, without the whole Josh situation, this would have been a good book. Knowing about it, the book's message fell a bit flat for me.

[ReadingWench · Rating 5 out of 5]

Some have review this book as preachy or if you have seen the show there is nothing new. I disagree on both parts.

The bible verses they use in the book are used factually and explain why they believe in something. I, being not religious at ALL, thought it was quite informative. No matter what your personal beliefs are, you do have to admire them for how they raise their children. Every one of them serves their community and help others, without being asked. Michelle Duggar calls it a “servant’s heart”.

As for if you have seen the show there is nothing new. There are many things in the book I did not know and I am an advert watcher of their show. I knew Michelle was sick when she delivered Josie. I didn’t realize just how sick she truly was. Nor did I know about a theft that had accured during a visit from a fan. I was also impressed with a lot of her parenting tips. For example, when a child shies away and hides when someone says hello to them. They believe that is disrespectful, and not “cute” as most people think. They teach their children to look at other people and say hello back. They believe it will build character and teach them that every person deserves to be responded to.

All in all I really liked this book. I was not offended by all the verses of the Bible. I thought them quite informative and I increased my knowledge of why certain people believe in certain things.

[Read-n-Bloom · Rating 3 out of 5]

They wrote this book before all the scandals came out. I believe these are just parents trying to teach their children in a good, Godly way, but we all fail somewhere no matter how hard we try. And I believe they keep their children away from the " world" too much. We are to teach them what it right, & what is wrong. How to live our life pleasing to God as the bible says, then as they age, let them go a little at a time, so they can learn some things. I can't explain everything in this review, so I'm just breaking it down. But I definitely know they cant be to blame for what their son did. He is a man. He makes his own decisions. They may have made some mistakes w/ the first issue, but he was young & they did try to do something. They tried to help him in their way. But I don't think it was enough. I don't believe he received the help he actually needed. This last thing he did was all on his own. They are not to blame. It was all him. I feel sorry for his wife & children to have to live w/ this.

[Cassandra · Rating 2 out of 5]

There is so much in this book that is covered in their other book (almost verbatim at times) so don't bother reading both. This one has more about Michelle and Josie's birth and "20 and Counting" has more about Michelle and Jim Bob's early relationship so if you really have to read one, choose based from that.

You (likely) already know what to expect from the Duggars so this is just more of that. They want you to know they're not "against" women going to college, that dating (among other things as Josh demonstrates) leads to improper touching and should be replaced with courtship (which protects the young woman by having all potential suitors negotiate a relationship through her father), and, of course, that birth control prevents God from bestowing His most holy blessing of children upon you (God has a latex allergy, I assume).

[Jennifer Ramirez · Rating 4 out of 5]

I read the first Duggar book out of blatant curiosity. I would consider the first one more of a biography on the family and this one more of a parenting book. I absolutely loved this book. I wish they would classify this as a parenting book. Now, if you have no Christian views then this book is not for you. But, if you do then this is a must read. I love how they talk about the expectations of their kids and have a scripture to go along with each one. So many times I want to talk to my kids about obedience and respect, but don't know how to relate it to being a good Christian. This book did an excellent job in cross referencing to Bible scriptures.

[Alisha Bonnell · Rating 5 out of 5]

for about five years now, i have been a HUGE fan of the Duggar family. if you were to ask me to name them in could do it (including Anna and her three kids).....I'm serious!
this family has truly inspired me to really think how I'm going t raise my future husband and children!
and I have to admit something! I am totally desiring to have just as many children. you can call me crazy, but it's not going to stop me lol!
I found this book incredible and recommend it to everyone. through this book you get a glimpse into their life and realize THEY ARE REAL! they don't act everything out while on TV and live a different life when there's no camera.

[Miss · Rating 2 out of 5]

Some of this was fly-on-the-wall great -- some of it was gaggingly idealistic/reverent.
Sorry to be so harsh!
But...really.

A lot of their moral stances I can respect - even though I roll my eyes.

Their family seems happy and full of love.
In the end, isn't that what matters?

So let me (and others like me) roll our eyes all we want.
Unlike Mr. Sheen, these people are "winning"!

[Emily Ross · Rating 3 out of 5]

I find the Duggar's fascinating and surprisingly down to earth and normal. Their show is one I watch regularly and I have enjoyed both their books. I don't agree with all their views but they are not crazy. I admire the positive parenting style Michelle has and am trying to speak softly and yell less myself!

[Katie · Rating 4 out of 5]

I don't agree with all the Duggar's beliefs, but I've always been intrigued by them and impressed by their parenting style. I got quite a few helpful tips out of this book and will read the other one as well, since the tips are working quite well with my little ones. I don't think it's the best-written book I've ever read, but it's easy to read and interesting!

[Jillian Ferry · Rating 5 out of 5]

I started to read to try to see their viewpoint as another book from a family member was suggested in my reading list and I wanted to get an idea of the family. I haven’t really seen their show or followed the family so this was my baseline. They have reasons behind their way of living and while most of this book is about the health of their youngest, the recipes and day to day conflict resolution situations add to how they make their lives work for them.

[Ashley · Rating 3 out of 5]

2.5 rounded up.

Most of what was written about here was already known so as someone who follows fundie culture it was a bit repetitive for me but overall it wasn't a badly written book even if their beliefs are 100% not for me. Kind of feel like trying some of the recipes in the book though.