Jump to ratings and reviews
Rate this book

From Junkie to Judge: One Woman's Triumph Over Trauma and Addiction

Rate this book
From a junkie addicted to methamphetamines to a federal judge, Mary Beth O’Connor’s memoir shares her inspiring journey from rock bottom to resilience as she forged a personal path to recovery from trauma and addiction.

Silver Award, 2023 Nonfiction Book Awards

Searing, unsettling, and ultimately triumphant, Judge O'Connor's debut memoir takes readers on a wild ride through the rock-bottom underbelly of intravenous drug addiction to the hallowed halls of justice where she rose to the pinnacle of success as a federal judge.

With wit and unabashed honesty, O’Connor shares her remarkable three-phase the abuse and trauma that drove her to teenage drug use, the chaos that ensued from her addiction; and how she developed a personalized secular recovery plan that led to twenty-nine years of sobriety. Her story proves any addict can recover and anyone can build a productive and happy life, no matter how low the bottom or how deep the pain.

Within a week of being born, O’Connor was dropped off at a convent. When she was brought into her home, her mother focused on her own needs and desires, ignoring her young child. When she was nine, her stepfather kicked her in the stomach for spilling milk, beat her when she didn’t clean a plate to his satisfaction, and molested her when she was twelve. A few months later, with her first sip of Boone’s Farm Strawberry Hill wine, her life changed. She felt euphoric and relaxed. So she got drunk as often as possible, adding pot, then pills, then acid. At sixteen, she found her drug of choice--methamphetamine. With her first snort, she experienced true joy for the first time. When this high was no longer sufficient, she turned to the needle and shot up.

During the next sixteen years, she descended into a severe meth addiction, working her way down the corporate ladder, destroying relationships, and shattering her physical and emotional well-being.

At thirty-two, she entered rehab, where she was ordered to submit to the 12-steps of Alcoholics Anonymous. As an atheist, turning her will and her life over to a higher power was not an option, and she refused to agree she was powerless. Told to comply or fail, she bravely created a new path that combined ideas from multiple programs and even incorporated some AA concepts.

Clean and sober now for more nearly three decades, she is proof that anyone can find their sober self, their best self, no matter how far they have fallen. Along with her inspiring story, she offers a comprehensive checklist of questions for readers to ask themselves as they take the brave steps toward recovery, offering a powerful blueprint for personal change.

336 pages, Paperback

Published January 24, 2023

31 people are currently reading
2228 people want to read

About the author

Mary Beth O'Connor

1 book16 followers
For Mary Beth, childhood abuse and other traumas led to substance use disorder (addiction).

Beginning with alcohol at age 12, she spent several years abusing various drugs. She found methamphetamine at 16 and started shooting up at 17. Mary Beth struggled with meth until she was 32 years old.

By incorporating ideas from multiple sources to build a secular (not 12-step or faith based) recovery plan that works for her, Mary Beth has been sober since 1994. She used similar techniques to address the trauma and related anxiety as well.

Mary Beth is a board member for LifeRing Secular Recovery and She Recovers Foundation. She speaks on behalf of these organizations, about multiple paths to recovery, and about all topics related to substance use disorder and recovery. She also speaks about sexual abuse and rape, child abuse, domestic violence, ptsd, anxiety, and recovering from these as well.

In 2020, Mary Beth published two opinion pieces about substance use disorder and recovery in major national publications.

She has published memoir pieces. Her book-length memoir, From Junkie to Judge: One Woman's Journey to Recovery without God, will be released on January 24, 2023 and is currently available for pre-order on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Bamm, Indie Bound, and other sites.

Professionally, 6 years into recovery, Mary Beth attended Berkeley Law. She worked at a large firm in Silicon Valley, then litigated class actions for the federal government. In 2014, Mary Beth was appointed a federal Administrative Law Judge, a position from which she retired in 2020.

Ratings & Reviews

What do you think?
Rate this book

Friends & Following

Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!

Community Reviews

5 stars
83 (56%)
4 stars
41 (27%)
3 stars
22 (14%)
2 stars
1 (<1%)
1 star
0 (0%)
Displaying 1 - 30 of 37 reviews
Profile Image for Morgan Putnam.
77 reviews1 follower
October 6, 2023
This was such an authentic reading experience from start to finish, and I loved every second of it. I picked this up at a favorite local book store on a whim. I opened it up at home to find it was signed by the author. And about 3/4 of the way through, I realized there was a publishing error. About 3 of the chapters were printed twice 😂 oops! Despite the error, I got the full text.
I honestly feel really grateful to have read Marybeth’s story. I’m enamored by her courage and vulnerability. Anyone who knows someone that’s been affected knows that addiction is an absolute beast. I’m blown away by Marybeth’s strength to overcome her struggles, and to do so in such an unconventional way. Her trauma is real— and trigger warning to any victims of SA and DV. However, I thank her for sharing her harsh realities and letting so many others know they aren’t alone. Super well done!
Profile Image for Sonja.
231 reviews3 followers
January 12, 2023
Thank you to NetGalley and HighBridge Audio for the audiobook version of this book. Everything I write os of my own thoughts, feelings, and opinions. I am in no way affiliated with or compensated for my review.

This is a story from a hard childhood with trauma and many forms abuse that leads to starting drugs- alcohol- pills- and whatever else Mary Beth O'Connor could find to dull her pain. O'Connor tries to live a normal life while still actively using many forms of drugs.
While in treatment she finds that most treatment programs rely heavily on faith and a higher power- she is an atheist and has to find ways to get through treatment while still standing firm to her own beliefs.

This book is jam packed with raw emotions. Raw truths that surround the "why" of addictions. This book is a real eye opener that your past doesn't define your future. The world we live in every person is touched by addiction in some capacity. This is a book that everyone should read. This is an amazing tool to understanding.
Profile Image for Megan.
4 reviews3 followers
June 1, 2024
I could read Mary Beth’s story a million times over and celebrate her recovery success with each read. A life of survival, an honest and deep dive into her life of abuse, substance use disorder and trauma. More importantly than surviving is the story of Mary Beth’s incredibly strong spirit, her intelligence and her incredible strength that never left her from early childhood through her traumatic home life, through her addiction, her abuse and her trauma. It is her spirit that guided her and gave her the strength she needed to recover and pull herself from the gates of Hell. It is her spirt that allowed her to walk through her own transformation from Junkie to Judge.
Profile Image for Kelly.
767 reviews38 followers
December 6, 2022
Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for providing this book in exchange for an honest review.
This is such an inspiring book. The 12 step recovery program is not a one size fits all program. I'm so happy the author didn't give up her recovery because of this. It's so important that there are other programs addicts can go through to gain sobriety. She has overcome an incredible amount of trauma and abuse to become a successful woman.
Profile Image for Madison Saunders.
4 reviews
June 9, 2025
Fantastic and insightful work into Recovery and Trauma. Throughout the book the author explores her life, trauma, and ultimately what led to her addiction. Through offering alternate recovery options to AA/NA it’s truly a great resource for those struggling through addiction, trauma, family experiences, etc.
Profile Image for Laura Wheeler.
145 reviews3 followers
January 28, 2023
Audiobook. Inspiring story of recovery. Timeline was confusing in places. Some sex scenes were written unnecessarily like erotica or porn & felt out of place. Narrator wasn't the best choice given some of the "street" dialogue she had to read.
ALC via NetGalley
Profile Image for AMAO.
1,664 reviews47 followers
January 23, 2023
From Junkie to Judge: One Woman's Triumph Over Trauma and Addiction
by Mary Beth O'Connor
Published January 24, 2023

<3 OMG! There is too much to say but it will only give too much away. I applaud this woman! This memoir left me riveted. To survive such an upbringing and then to navigate that trauma through addiction... The details of her violent encounters from parents and strangers... Navigating childhood trauma is difficult enough without an addiction! This was a great #audiobooking experience. It will definitely give hope to others who struggle with a chemical dependence disorder. It left me wondering what happen to those minor characters who inflicted major trauma though... There is unthinkable evil in this world and I hope those folks were visited by KARMA. This was a painful narration but equally uplifting and empowering. The voice artist was outstanding! <3

@MaryBethO_ @she_recovers #FromJunkietoJudge #NetGalley #ARC



From a junkie addicted to methamphetamines to a federal judge, Mary Beth O'Connor's memoir shares her inspiring journey from rock bottom to resilience as she forged a personal path to recovery from trauma and addiction.

Searing, unsettling, and ultimately triumphant, Judge O'Connor's debut memoir takes listeners on a wild ride through the rock-bottom underbelly of intravenous drug addiction to the hallowed halls of justice, where she rose to the pinnacle of success as a federal judge.

With wit and unabashed honesty, O'Connor shares her remarkable three-phase journey: the abuse and trauma that drove her to teenage drug use, the chaos that ensued from her addiction, and how she developed a personalized secular recovery plan that led to twenty-nine years of sobriety. Her story proves any addict can recover and anyone can build a productive and happy life, no matter how low the bottom or how deep the pain.
Profile Image for Jennifer.
1,836 reviews
March 28, 2023
Mary Beth O’Connor began drinking alcohol and using drugs as a young teen. She progressed quickly to intravenous methamphetamine drug use and spent two decades as a junkie. This book is the story of her childhood and young adult years. She shares in great detail about the trauma, abuse and neglect that pushed her to try substances and get hooked. Essentially, the riskiness of drug use mirrored her family life and felt safe to her. However, in her words, “Life of the addict is not fun, not exciting, not glamorous. It’s a miserable, all-consuming, agonizing, chaotic existence.”
While the story is inspirational, over 75% is about her drug use and could be traumatizing to readers as it details physical, emotional, sexual, and mental abuse. Only 25% of the book addresses her recovery journey. I wanted more of that part of the story and more wisdom like “Just not today” (her mantra when deciding whether to use drugs or not) and “I no longer was an active addict but rather had an addiction history.”
I do appreciate the questionnaire at the end that can help readers decide if they’re ready for recovery. And Judge O’Connor is an advocate for each person taking their own journey to recovery, whether that includes religion or not. In fact, she is heavily involved in LifeRing Secular Recovery and the She Recovers Foundation.
Also, she’s careful to not put the blame solely on her violent, neglectful parents. She takes responsibility for her continuing patterns of behavior and denial that led her to use drugs for years. And she protects the privacy of her family in many places.
Profile Image for Lauren Heintz.
24 reviews
June 25, 2023
I had the pleasure of seeing Mary Beth O’Connor speak at a Harm Reduction summit, which led me to her book. It was definitely challenging to read what she had to experience during her lifetime, often feeling reminded of personal experiences from myself and loved ones around me, but it also brought a sense of peace to know she recovered and is thriving.
While the entire book made an impact on me, there was one statement in particular I had read towards the end where she says “I tried to release my resentment towards those who put my recovery at risk with the falsehood that there was only one path,” that made me want to applaud. I think one of the biggest challenges I have faced while experiencing a loved ones recovery is this. It is HARD to find treatment programs that fit, and even more so ones that are flexible to your recovery path. I know there is some responsibility on the person, and obstacles programs face, but Mary Beth discusses several avenues that allowed her to decide what HER OWN treatment was going to look like after dismissing those who challenged her religious beliefs in recovery.

She was open, vulnerable, and incredibly honest with the many stages of who she was. I admire her strength, preservation, and honesty. It is such a joy to read stories such as hers, when too often we’re being flooded with the many who don’t experience the same outcome as she did.
Profile Image for Shelley Marushak Langelaar.
231 reviews2 followers
April 27, 2023
An authentic look at how someone was able to make the choices that led them from addiction to recovery. I applaud Mary Beth O’Connor for her courage and transparency in sharing her story. There were times that I was confused as she would say that 12 step groups were too religious for her, yet she encouraged people to attend and she still attended. It is true that recovery isn’t a one size fits all and that a person must tailor their recovery to who they are (been an addictions counselor for almost 30 years now). It was refreshing to see her share some of the alternative (not mainstream) behaviors and actions that worked for her. At times (especially in the beginning) the writing was pretty raw and graphic and could be triggers for those who are in the beginning of searching for recovery or who are in the beginning of their journey in recovery.

Thank you NetGalley and the publisher for this advanced copy. Review is strictly my own personal opinion.
9 reviews1 follower
February 10, 2023
I’m grateful that net galley let me preview the book.

The book is such a worthwhile read, while sometimes harrowing.

It’s hard to look at the woman the author is, and all she has accomplished, and realize what she’s been through it – and that all by itself is a reason to read the book!

The author’s belief in herself could be a separate character in the book. She faced tremendous obstacles, and did some things that I found terrifying. Where I think many others would have given up, she continued, and she triumphed.

One of my favorite things about the book is how masterfully she designed her own recovery – – with the support of others, but something that would work for her long-term.

Her writing, even in the bleakest parts of her life, is lovely.

She is sharing her story to help others; while the reading can be tough going, it is so worth the effort!
408 reviews
January 21, 2023
Holy crap what did I listen to? This book reminds me of Jennette McCurdy’s book in that I was saying wtf every other page. From Junkie to Judge is the insane true story of Mary Beth O’Connor and how she went from being addicted to drugs for most of her life to becoming a recovering addict and a federal judge. Through therapy and rehab she was able to redirect her life back towards the path she had originally wanted years before and showing how someone can operate both inside and out of the strictly religious AA programs as an Atheist was just amazing. I can’t wait for this book to come out so all of my friends can read/listen to this amazing story.

Thank you Netgalley, Highbridge audio and Mary Beth O’Connor for the audiobook ARC
Profile Image for Ashley (adoseofthrills).
106 reviews
February 9, 2023
“ We only get to say what works for ourselves”

I don’t normally read memoirs but I knew I had to read this one. It hits way too close to home now too.

Mary Beth has had to overcome everything life threw at her from the moment she entered this world. Life was determined to stop her from being or doing anything in her life. But Mary Beth had other plans and proved everyone wrong! This is a must read ❤️

Addiction does not care where you live, how you were brought up, how much money you make, etc…but this books proves that we do recover.

I love that Mary Beth is telling her story because this needs to be talked about and shared more often. Addiction and mental health matter, it’s time we start acting and showing we care!
Profile Image for Dhanamusil.
51 reviews16 followers
November 7, 2023
Page turner. Highly descriptive. Candid and introspective and honest and an unflinching look at how one woman's childhood attributed to her addiction and of course, the rest of her life. I've read alot of addiction memoir, or quit-lit as I believe it's now called, and this one is just superb. From the very first page O'Connor pulls the reader into a world of IV drug use in such a natural way, it feels like we're watching a movie rather than reading a book. Her use of hindsight moments sprinkled throughout makes the reader understand they're in the hands of a deft and reliable narrator. This book also has an educational component around addiction and recovery which will prove an invaluable tool for anyone seeking out this resources.
1 review
January 28, 2023
I loved that the author started with her difficult childhood and showed how this led her to start using drugs at 12 and to progress so quickly to methamphetamine. She also immersed us in other traumas and her addiction, but balanced this with lighter moments and important reflections about events. I also appreciated that about 30% of the book focuses on her recovery. She explains her thinking and her experiences and how she built a solid, individualized program that worked for her. As the cherry on top, she provides guildelines and checklists useful for those looking for a plan as they begin their recovery.
234 reviews7 followers
May 4, 2023
I am so pleased that I had the opportunity to read this amazing story. As I turned the pages I could not believe what I was reading - how can one person withstand so much and yet live to tell the story? It seemed that Mary Beth was never going to find what she was seeking and every page I expected to see that someone had given her a shoulder to lean on that would change her existence from the depths of addiction and abuse, to a life full of hope and sobriety. The journey is almost unbelievable, but when you take it all in, it seems that Mary Beth indeed did it her way and with the love and support of Doc, moved out of the darkness and into the life that was always waiting for her.
Profile Image for Kathy Wagner.
3 reviews
May 31, 2023
I am so grateful for people who recover out loud, and Mary Beth O'Connor is no exception. From Junkie to Judge: One Woman's Triumph Over Trauma and Addiction is a compelling story about a remarkable woman who refused to give in or give up, and who charted her own path to wellness. Through this important memoir about finding her own way out of darkness, O'Connor shines a light for others to follow.
Profile Image for Markie.
474 reviews34 followers
July 3, 2023
Mary Beth O'Connor's book details her childhood and young adult years, including trauma, abuse, and neglect that led her to start using drugs and become addicted. While her story is inspirational, over 75% of the book is dedicated to her drug use and could be triggering for readers. Only 25% of the book focuses on her recovery journey and helpful insights. However, the book does offer a questionnaire to help readers determine if they are ready for recovery, and O'Connor emphasizes the importance of each person taking their own journey to recovery, whether or not it includes religion. She also takes responsibility for her behaviors and protects the privacy of her family.
Profile Image for OhioSQ.
82 reviews1 follower
March 28, 2025
I found Mary Beth O’Connor on BlueSky. I started following her, appreciating her self guided approach to recovery. I am also an atheist who was unable to embrace 12-step programs. Although my drugs of choice were primarily alcohol and marijuana, Mary Beth’s recovery story resonated with me. Her approach proves that there is more than one way to recover. Kudos to her for finding her path.

The chapters about her childhood and active addiction were gut wrenching and difficult to read. I’m surprised that she was able to remember all of the details. I’m glad she’s in a loving supportive relationship now.
Profile Image for AddysBookishAddiction.
137 reviews8 followers
January 25, 2023
TW: drug use, SA, sex-drug trading, loss

What a powerful story of recovery! As someone that has struggled with addiction(sober 7 years as of September 2022) this book is such a needed piece of work.

From Junkie to Judge is the perfect balance of showing the trauma of childhood, struggles with staying sober, and making a better life for yourself.

Thank you to HighBridge Audio and NetGalley for allowing me to listen to this ARC in exchange for an honest review.
Profile Image for KWinks  .
1,311 reviews15 followers
April 28, 2023
Mary Beth came to our library to do a reading and everyone was checking out a copy of the book and bringing it back in two days. They said it was unputdownable.
Now, I didn't grow up in town and I do not know any of the people in this book but I could still get into the story and can appreciate everything Mary Beth has overcome. I especially loved what she had to say about AA and recovery.
I'm so grateful she decided to share her story.

Trigger warnings all over the place!
Profile Image for Maria.
Author 6 books14 followers
August 8, 2023
This book was raw and, at times, difficult to read, due to its stark description of drug use and abuse. I applaud the author’s frankness and honesty, as well as her desire to pay it forward to fellow sufferers. Wow! Judge O’Connor is a survivor and thriver who has and will inspire many to escape the black hole of addiction and effects of abuse. Thank you for shedding more light on these issues. I won’t forget this book!
32 reviews3 followers
December 6, 2022
Fascinating story of this woman's traumatic childhood that drove her to ultimately abuse meth, her journey into recovery and her hope for others who are struggling. Highly recommend, even if you have not been touched by trauma or addiction. The book is very well written and I'm amazed that the writer is even alive, let alone successful and thriving.
1 review
February 17, 2023
An incredible story of surviving neglect, abuse, trauma and addiction. The book grips you from the very first page. That the author recovered - and thrived - is a testament to her character and fortitude. Her journey is an inspiration to those who suffer from addictions as well as to their loved ones: never give up.
Profile Image for Sue Granzella.
16 reviews1 follower
February 22, 2023
It's a terrific book. I love books that give me a window into a world I don't know, and this one sure did that. The way she details the extreme abuse she endured for so long really helped me understand how addiction naturally followed. The prose is clean and clear, and the story, while brutal, is fascinating. I couldn't put it down!
Profile Image for Daryl Dittmer.
Author 2 books5 followers
June 3, 2025
I was initially taken by the very vivid and descriptive writing the author utilized in communicating her story. I was then blown away by the honesty and grit. Very powerful.
From Junkie to Judge is a testament to the fact that we can all overcome our trauma's, obstacles, and hurdles, and move ourselves into a different and significantly better life.
9 reviews
January 3, 2024
I was captivated by this story from start to finish. She is authentic and honest and I am really glad that there is a book out there that shows secular recovery and explains why it works for her and other women. I recommend this book to women all of the time.
Profile Image for Purrfectlypatti.
403 reviews34 followers
April 19, 2024
I bought this book after meeting the author at my local B&N. I asked her what made her write a memoir? She answered that she hoped her story would help others. (She said more than that & way more eloquently than I ever could).
Displaying 1 - 30 of 37 reviews

Can't find what you're looking for?

Get help and learn more about the design.