Oh, American Pageant, what an academic year we've had together. Even though I poured hours of my life into you and your over 1000 pages, I appreciate all you've taught me. Your wisdom makes me a more educated future voter, after all. Somehow, you not only taught me volumes, but you did so in a gloriously clever way. Every time you used the word "crusty" when referring to historical figures or described the founding fathers like the love interests of a YA romance novel, I cracked a small smile and perhaps even let out the occasional audible laugh. You might've fractured my sense of humor forever, but at least I found you entertaining.
Today marks the day I close the American Pageant forever, but I look forward to living its future chapters armed with centuries of knowledge and textbookish dry humor, courtesy of you.