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A Mother's Rule of Life: How to Bring Order to Your Home and Peace to Your Soul
How to bring peace to your home. Create your own Mother's Rule of Life, a pattern for living that combines the spiritual wisdom of the monastery with the practical wisdom of motherhood.
With the help of your own rule, you can get control of your own household, grow closer to God, come to love your husband more, and raise up good Christian children.
With the help of your own rule, you can get control of your own household, grow closer to God, come to love your husband more, and raise up good Christian children.
205 pages, Paperback
First published April 15, 2004
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 169 reviews
October 27, 2016
First reading October 2014:
This was an interesting book and is a valuable resource. I think that this book is built on solid thinking. Much of her personality is infused into it and that gives it both its character and its weaknesses. I respect that Holly has an interesting history and a complicated one. It is important for the reader to understand her perspective in order to understand her conclusions. Being Catholic and having had a different but not dissimilar journey, I could appreciate her background information and not be too bogged down by it. I think, however, that the beginning of the book is pretty heavy in personal story telling and that that could easily alienate a number of readers who could otherwise connect with and appreciate the book.
I have seen many reviews of this book which criticize it for too much personal story telling and/or a far too mechanical a schedule. I understand those reviews but I think that they are not very fair when thinking of the book as a whole.
First of all, Holly is coming from a Managers of Their Homes perspective on scheduling. If the readers understands that that is an established and commonly used scheduling philosophy in homeschooling circles, it can more readily be dismissed as sort of irrelevant.
I have seen reviewers call this "Catholic Fly Lady". I think that that is a sad over generalization of the book. Perhaps non-Catholics are unaware of the "Rule" that many religious (and lay) orders take on themselves as part of their vows. A Rule is not some pop-culture cleaning and housekeeping routine. It is very specific way of life that breaks the day into meaningful chunks so that prayer, vocation and worship of God can remain in full focus. A Rule is what strengthens and underpins the daily motions of a nun or ordered priest. A Rule is not a method, it is a promise. It is not an idea, it is a commitment. It has religious value.
The concept that this book is about a Mother's Rule for life is totally different than some scheduling philosophy. It is an acknowledgment that a mother is a creature created by God with a very specific vocation for His glory and her spiritual happiness. When a woman undertakes the task of prayerfully discerning her "Rule," she is considering her vocation, her worldly and spiritual obligations and inviting the Holy Spirit to inform her schedule such that she can keep the most important parts of her work central to her day and her passion.
This book does more than encourage a woman to embrace her vocation and establish a schedule for her day. It prompts her to unpack her roles. Study her callings. Consider her obligations. And then to take those parts of her life and bring them into balance. Holly wisely gives her readers a series of primary questions for each role. After we get through her personal story, we see the 5 questions or 5 callings of each woman. Those 5 parts of a Mother each receive their own chapter with more stories, more questions and lots of inspiration.
Regrettably, this book is not one-size fits all even for a small audience. Presuming that all those who pick up this book are Christian mothers who desire to bring their life into balance in a way that has worked for women for centuries, many women will still get bogged down in the particular nuances of Holly's very specific Catholic bent. Being of the same bent as Holly, it did not bother me except that I knew that recommending it to others would require me to encourage them to be patient and use a filter as they read.
The gems in this book are real. The ideas are truly not specific to creed or calling. The ideas are timeless, valuable and somewhat universal. I highly recommend this book for any Christian mother who wishes to maximize her vocation through proper balance, healthy prayer and self care. For the mom who is not Catholic or who does not Homeschool or who is not a fan of rote prayer, I encourage you to stick it out and just filter out the nuances and focus in on the principles. The principles are solid and can be applied to nearly any of us.
August 30, 2023
I didn’t connect with this book almost at all.
My women’s studies class loved it but it was a miss for me!
I felt it read as a PowerPoint presentation and would have been better as a TED Talks speech.
There were also many references that went over my head and I felt those could have been explained better for your average reader.
It was a nice message and one that may be helpful for me once my kids are a bit older but right now in my life this book wasn’t entirely relevant.
2.5⭐️ rounding up because it may become beneficial for me in the future.
My women’s studies class loved it but it was a miss for me!
I felt it read as a PowerPoint presentation and would have been better as a TED Talks speech.
There were also many references that went over my head and I felt those could have been explained better for your average reader.
It was a nice message and one that may be helpful for me once my kids are a bit older but right now in my life this book wasn’t entirely relevant.
2.5⭐️ rounding up because it may become beneficial for me in the future.
January 12, 2011
Own. Recommended by Willa & DeputyHeadmistress.
A "Rule of Life" is a concept the author took from medieval monastics. I found it interesting that it incorporated many concepts popular in current self-help categories, yet she never mentioned the modern words for the concepts. She kept her book very grounded in historic practice and highly religious (I do not mean that to be negative) perspective. In common, secular parlance, what she recommends is having a mission statement, a job description, a plan with goals, a delineation of roles and responsibilities, a household notebook (control journal in FlyLady terms), and a schedule. Her discussion of these concepts without even a hint that they are related to modern productivity techniques, but instead grounded in some of the church's earliest attempts at holy living put a new spin on concepts I thought I was entirely familiar with.
A good portion of this book is autobiographical. However, her relation of her history is woven into her detailing her "Rule" in ways that illustrate her meaning and demonstrate how she moved from point B to A. Thus, the material is presented in a very personal manner. It is no dry instruction manual. She tells you what she did and why, for the most part leaving you to determine the proper application to your own situation. The author is Catholic, and it certainly comes through strongly in her writing, but it is not a Catholicism that will put off most Protestants. The story of her conversion is enough for any Baptist, and she talks much more of Jesus and the Holy Spirit than saints or objects. I think where the Catholicism came out the most (besides the eucharist) is in how she obligated her conscience in the matter. I'm still chewing on that concept, trying not to toss it out of hand mumbling "legalist," but obviously a Protestant is not going to be on board with regarding anything a counselor or mentor says as morally binding as if from the mouth of God. Still, I tend to use the anti-legalist argument to get out of doing what I know I should do, even if it's not technically "a sin" if I don't. I reread Elisabeth Elliot's Discipline: The Glad Surrender after finishing this book to get another angle on that issue, and it confirmed the possibility that not doing your duty when you ought to is wrong, that the way of growth is through submitting to duty.
In all, I enjoyed the autobiographical element, as it made what she was saying more clear and understandable and allowed her to state what she did and how and why without being bossy or dictatorial about what you should do. The style reminded me a little of Kathleen Norris' Acedia and Me.
A "Rule of Life" is a concept the author took from medieval monastics. I found it interesting that it incorporated many concepts popular in current self-help categories, yet she never mentioned the modern words for the concepts. She kept her book very grounded in historic practice and highly religious (I do not mean that to be negative) perspective. In common, secular parlance, what she recommends is having a mission statement, a job description, a plan with goals, a delineation of roles and responsibilities, a household notebook (control journal in FlyLady terms), and a schedule. Her discussion of these concepts without even a hint that they are related to modern productivity techniques, but instead grounded in some of the church's earliest attempts at holy living put a new spin on concepts I thought I was entirely familiar with.
A good portion of this book is autobiographical. However, her relation of her history is woven into her detailing her "Rule" in ways that illustrate her meaning and demonstrate how she moved from point B to A. Thus, the material is presented in a very personal manner. It is no dry instruction manual. She tells you what she did and why, for the most part leaving you to determine the proper application to your own situation. The author is Catholic, and it certainly comes through strongly in her writing, but it is not a Catholicism that will put off most Protestants. The story of her conversion is enough for any Baptist, and she talks much more of Jesus and the Holy Spirit than saints or objects. I think where the Catholicism came out the most (besides the eucharist) is in how she obligated her conscience in the matter. I'm still chewing on that concept, trying not to toss it out of hand mumbling "legalist," but obviously a Protestant is not going to be on board with regarding anything a counselor or mentor says as morally binding as if from the mouth of God. Still, I tend to use the anti-legalist argument to get out of doing what I know I should do, even if it's not technically "a sin" if I don't. I reread Elisabeth Elliot's Discipline: The Glad Surrender after finishing this book to get another angle on that issue, and it confirmed the possibility that not doing your duty when you ought to is wrong, that the way of growth is through submitting to duty.
In all, I enjoyed the autobiographical element, as it made what she was saying more clear and understandable and allowed her to state what she did and how and why without being bossy or dictatorial about what you should do. The style reminded me a little of Kathleen Norris' Acedia and Me.
July 12, 2008
I didn't care for this book. I know so many loved it, but it leaned too much toward self-centeredness for me. I understood what she was trying to do/say, but I think she went about it the wrong way. I can see how this book could be helpful as a stepping stone for someone who finds themselves in the place she had found herself, but not as a "Rule for Life". A much better book, in my opinion, is "Holiness for Housewives".
October 10, 2022
Her emphasis on prayer, Bible study, etc. is especially convicting, and I appreciated her honesty about her struggles. I don't think the entire Rule thing as she has laid out is for me, but there are things to glean and apply in my own life.
March 12, 2017
I don't have a "rule" that I follow like the author's, and I probably never will. but Her "five Ps" have helped me prioritize my time. And I looove her concept of the Mother's sabbath. Perhaps because I already was taking one and this helped me (somewhat) get over the guilt
June 3, 2009
It was a good book, and motivational. Her system, though, is way more structured than I or my family could live with. I appreciate the author's candor and willingness to share what worked for her.
March 25, 2024
Honestly, this book is mostly trying to convince you to make a schedule for you and your kids, which is not revolutionary. A lot of it was skimmable. But the way it breaks it down into incorporating activities into your schedule that help you live out your roles in the areas of prayer, person, partner, parent, and provider encouraged me to take a look at each of those areas with renewed inspiration.
Biggest personal takeaway: In particular, the section on parenting inspired me to really think about my responsibilities to my kid(s) as not just watching them, but “preparing them for what he must *be*, and for what he must *do* here below, in order to attain the sublime end for which he was created.” I’ve always felt a strong distaste for being a mom who constantly supplies activities for her kids, but this gave me a refreshed vision for my days at home and an excitement for *occasionally* providing activities and memories to help my kids grow - whether that be helping them learn to wash their hands or helping them learn about Easter. Now why did this inspiration to reinvent my entire life have to come two weeks before my due date with #2? Not sure. Stay tuned.
Biggest personal takeaway: In particular, the section on parenting inspired me to really think about my responsibilities to my kid(s) as not just watching them, but “preparing them for what he must *be*, and for what he must *do* here below, in order to attain the sublime end for which he was created.” I’ve always felt a strong distaste for being a mom who constantly supplies activities for her kids, but this gave me a refreshed vision for my days at home and an excitement for *occasionally* providing activities and memories to help my kids grow - whether that be helping them learn to wash their hands or helping them learn about Easter. Now why did this inspiration to reinvent my entire life have to come two weeks before my due date with #2? Not sure. Stay tuned.
June 24, 2011
Own. (Maybe 4.5?)
I read this at Mystie's and the DHM's recommendation.
And, boy did I need to read this.
I agree with the DHM, some of this book is very, very Roman Catholic. Formal Confession, Spiritual Directors, the Eucharist, etc. are mentioned frequently in this. Again, as in Beauty for Truth's Sake, I had to read past that and do some mental translating. There was a point when I almost stopped reading early on because the theology was too much different.
But, I'm glad I didn't.
Pierlot has written a book, inspired by MOTH, that feels more achievable, more friendly, more rooted in the Christian faith. She is creating a "Rule" for family life and structure and all the needs that attend to that idea. A "Rule" (and the Protestant in me shudders at that word) is based on the monastic Rules (e.g. Benedict's Rule of Order) which give structure to the lives of those living in the monastery. She asks, why not use it for the vocation of marriage and family? How can this idea be used in organizing and aiding the life of prayer and practicalities of a family?
She orders the book around a wife's vocation. I have my quibbles with her ordering of her thoughts, but they seem minor; particularly when I consider how my thinking doesn't work itself out into life.
I most especially appreciate her discussion on setting one's will to accomplish the goals set forth, asking the Lord for his help in setting one's will, and her late chapters on sloth and its hold on many of us, particularly me.
I read the book through. At the end of each chapter there are exercises and questions to consider which I didn't do after each chapter, rather I intend to work through them now that I've finished the book and see where it is going. I both need the big picture and I was generally enjoying the reading of it, so I didn't want to stop and break that rhythm.
I really enjoyed this work and pray that I can apprehend what is good and use it to bring about good change. You should certainly read the other reviews I linked to, they both are very helpful in their perspective and better writers than I am.
I read this at Mystie's and the DHM's recommendation.
And, boy did I need to read this.
I agree with the DHM, some of this book is very, very Roman Catholic. Formal Confession, Spiritual Directors, the Eucharist, etc. are mentioned frequently in this. Again, as in Beauty for Truth's Sake, I had to read past that and do some mental translating. There was a point when I almost stopped reading early on because the theology was too much different.
But, I'm glad I didn't.
Pierlot has written a book, inspired by MOTH, that feels more achievable, more friendly, more rooted in the Christian faith. She is creating a "Rule" for family life and structure and all the needs that attend to that idea. A "Rule" (and the Protestant in me shudders at that word) is based on the monastic Rules (e.g. Benedict's Rule of Order) which give structure to the lives of those living in the monastery. She asks, why not use it for the vocation of marriage and family? How can this idea be used in organizing and aiding the life of prayer and practicalities of a family?
She orders the book around a wife's vocation. I have my quibbles with her ordering of her thoughts, but they seem minor; particularly when I consider how my thinking doesn't work itself out into life.
I most especially appreciate her discussion on setting one's will to accomplish the goals set forth, asking the Lord for his help in setting one's will, and her late chapters on sloth and its hold on many of us, particularly me.
I read the book through. At the end of each chapter there are exercises and questions to consider which I didn't do after each chapter, rather I intend to work through them now that I've finished the book and see where it is going. I both need the big picture and I was generally enjoying the reading of it, so I didn't want to stop and break that rhythm.
I really enjoyed this work and pray that I can apprehend what is good and use it to bring about good change. You should certainly read the other reviews I linked to, they both are very helpful in their perspective and better writers than I am.
December 28, 2013
So good. Written from a Catholic perspective, and not a subtle one! Pierlot talks about how to order your home, essentially, like a monastery. It sounds weird, but it isn't. I found it extremely helpful, and appreciated her honesty (confessing her sin of sloth, for instance) and practicality (charts in the back of the book!). This is not just another book on how to schedule your family and your home. It's about the heart (or the Rule), and Christ.
"A Rule of life is a traditional Christian tool for ordering one's vocation. Found most often in religious community life, a Rule can also be used by laypeople--whose state in life is no less a calling from God. It consists primarily in the examination of one's vocation and the duties it entails, and the development of a schedule for fulfilling these responsibilities in a consistent and orderly way."
Yet this Rule of Life is all done with the intent to please Christ--and to be conscious of that fact always. The aim is holiness, as with all things.
The sacraments, Pierlot believes and I wholeheartedly agree, are essential in this: "As study enlightens our mind, the sacraments strengthen our will."
And finally: "We're called to bring God to our children's spirits, truth to their minds, health to their bodies, skill to their hands, beauty and creativity to their hearts, and in all this, virtue to their wills and sanctity to their souls."
"A Rule of life is a traditional Christian tool for ordering one's vocation. Found most often in religious community life, a Rule can also be used by laypeople--whose state in life is no less a calling from God. It consists primarily in the examination of one's vocation and the duties it entails, and the development of a schedule for fulfilling these responsibilities in a consistent and orderly way."
Yet this Rule of Life is all done with the intent to please Christ--and to be conscious of that fact always. The aim is holiness, as with all things.
The sacraments, Pierlot believes and I wholeheartedly agree, are essential in this: "As study enlightens our mind, the sacraments strengthen our will."
And finally: "We're called to bring God to our children's spirits, truth to their minds, health to their bodies, skill to their hands, beauty and creativity to their hearts, and in all this, virtue to their wills and sanctity to their souls."
July 28, 2018
I liked the concept of this book a lot, and felt that in many ways it was the perfect complement to The Little Oratory. As we start to set up our homeschool this coming year (2018-2019), I do want to implement some of what the author suggests, but probably a less intense version that would be a bit more suitable to our family culture and the very young ages of my kids. I did appreciate reading how the author set up her Rule, but I don't necessarily think every family needs quite the level of detail in their scheduling that she uses. Still, this is a valuable resource that made me think a lot about how I want to organize our home and I'm glad my book club chose it!
January 19, 2014
Just not my cup of tea. It was on page 20 that I realized this wasn't the book for me, with this sentence: "So how did my Rule look, once I got everything organized?" I wanted the book that told the story on the way to "once I got everything organized," how that process can happen while maintaining peace of heart and joy of vocation. Since the getting there was glossed over, the book felt unhelpful and even a bit preachy to me. Maybe I'd have felt a little warmer toward the book if the subtitle were omitted, just for truth in advertising.
Read
February 10, 2018I'm undecided about a rating for this one, so I'm opting out. My local book group is reading this slowly, but as I was struggling with the very Catholic principles and practices set out in this book, I decided to finish it quickly to understand the full scope.
A Protestant can benefit from this book, though it's probably a good idea to be firmly rooted in your own beliefs and theology first.
A Protestant can benefit from this book, though it's probably a good idea to be firmly rooted in your own beliefs and theology first.
November 14, 2007
This was a nice "ideal" to strive for, but I beleive her system to be a little unrealistic for me personally. I got a lot of good ideas though, that have helped me be more organized in our household.
May 2, 2021
I will be giving this book away to anyone who wants it in my homeschool group. Not bad, just not for me; I’m more of the Mary Reed Newland type :)
June 28, 2025
This book had several things that really stuck with me, and I definitely recommend it!
First things first, I did not realize this author was Catholic and that that would play prominently in the book. As a person of Protestant faith, this was definitely an unusual read for me. I feel like I missed the meaning and importance of some things she said, just from my lack of knowledge. BUT even if I had known that going in, I still would have read this book. The heart of her message is applicable to all Christian women.
I was a little nervous going in that this would be another do this not that soapbox, which would sound great, but ultimately leave me feeling overwhelmed. But it wasn’t, I’ve never read anything quite like it. Instead it was a framework for determining your own Rule of devotion to the vocation of marriage, family, and motherhood.
She focuses on what she calls the Five P’s: Prayer, Person, Partner, Parent, and Provider. And they go in that order of importance. She did a good job of providing her own personal experience as background, the meaning of each P, and then practical questions you can ask yourself to form your Rule. She provides her own Rule as an example. She also makes a point to discuss that this takes time, and the important thing is to start, to try. God honors any amount of effort.
Some of the things that stuck with me are:
1. The idea that when we offer up our proverbial bread and fish, God will bless and multiply our efforts. I have heard this idea before and it’s had a positive impact on my life. But the reason it really changed my heart here is because the author further expounded. The disciples didn’t give some of their bread and fish… they gave ALL. I have been praying multiple mornings a week some prayer along the lines of “God here’s my crumbs and fish flakes, please use it and multiply it.” And at the start that definitely changed my perspective. But I was not offering anything of sacrifice. I was not offering ALL. I was offering what was easy for me to offer from my state of tiredness. Loving my family and being in this role costs ALL I have, and that is the few fish and loaves that God will bless and multiply in my life.
2. “The only way to get closer to God was to become ordered enough inside to enable me to experience him within.” I’ve always thought of order and discipline in habits as a boring and flat way to love God. I don’t know why I’ve never thought of being ordered and disciplined as freeing up space to experience God!
3. She quotes Pope John Paul as defining love as “available, acceptance, and help.” This was specific to the chapter on Partner - or marriage. It just seemed a simple way to think about actively loving my husband as well as my kids. Am I available with my time, when we’re both home? And I accepting to him? How can I help him?
4. As God created the earth and then provided food and shelter for Adam and Eve, I get to mirror that work by cultivating my home and providing food and shelter for my family.
5. “Place yourself in a spirit of obedience to God’s will. Tackle every task as a direct response to God, just as if he were asking, ‘Will you go do your laundry now?’”
6. “Schedule what you can schedule, practice it, do it, and develop a habit… Sit down and read. Just decide to do it. Nothing will change until you do.”
7. She spoke of saying “Jesus, I do this because I love you” as she went about her tasks. It was awkward and strange at first, but the more she did it the more it had an impact. I have tried doing this a few times already as I unload the dishwasher and clean up things I don’t want to clean up. And she was right, it was weird, but also comforting. I really do everything I do because I want to take care of my family. Which is how I love God, by obeying the call of marriage and homemaking.
Overall a good book that I definitely recommend. I didn’t give it 5 stars simply because it is so saturated with her Catholic faith that at times it made it a little hard for me to relate. Again, that’s not a problem, she’s allowed to write what she wants :)
First things first, I did not realize this author was Catholic and that that would play prominently in the book. As a person of Protestant faith, this was definitely an unusual read for me. I feel like I missed the meaning and importance of some things she said, just from my lack of knowledge. BUT even if I had known that going in, I still would have read this book. The heart of her message is applicable to all Christian women.
I was a little nervous going in that this would be another do this not that soapbox, which would sound great, but ultimately leave me feeling overwhelmed. But it wasn’t, I’ve never read anything quite like it. Instead it was a framework for determining your own Rule of devotion to the vocation of marriage, family, and motherhood.
She focuses on what she calls the Five P’s: Prayer, Person, Partner, Parent, and Provider. And they go in that order of importance. She did a good job of providing her own personal experience as background, the meaning of each P, and then practical questions you can ask yourself to form your Rule. She provides her own Rule as an example. She also makes a point to discuss that this takes time, and the important thing is to start, to try. God honors any amount of effort.
Some of the things that stuck with me are:
1. The idea that when we offer up our proverbial bread and fish, God will bless and multiply our efforts. I have heard this idea before and it’s had a positive impact on my life. But the reason it really changed my heart here is because the author further expounded. The disciples didn’t give some of their bread and fish… they gave ALL. I have been praying multiple mornings a week some prayer along the lines of “God here’s my crumbs and fish flakes, please use it and multiply it.” And at the start that definitely changed my perspective. But I was not offering anything of sacrifice. I was not offering ALL. I was offering what was easy for me to offer from my state of tiredness. Loving my family and being in this role costs ALL I have, and that is the few fish and loaves that God will bless and multiply in my life.
2. “The only way to get closer to God was to become ordered enough inside to enable me to experience him within.” I’ve always thought of order and discipline in habits as a boring and flat way to love God. I don’t know why I’ve never thought of being ordered and disciplined as freeing up space to experience God!
3. She quotes Pope John Paul as defining love as “available, acceptance, and help.” This was specific to the chapter on Partner - or marriage. It just seemed a simple way to think about actively loving my husband as well as my kids. Am I available with my time, when we’re both home? And I accepting to him? How can I help him?
4. As God created the earth and then provided food and shelter for Adam and Eve, I get to mirror that work by cultivating my home and providing food and shelter for my family.
5. “Place yourself in a spirit of obedience to God’s will. Tackle every task as a direct response to God, just as if he were asking, ‘Will you go do your laundry now?’”
6. “Schedule what you can schedule, practice it, do it, and develop a habit… Sit down and read. Just decide to do it. Nothing will change until you do.”
7. She spoke of saying “Jesus, I do this because I love you” as she went about her tasks. It was awkward and strange at first, but the more she did it the more it had an impact. I have tried doing this a few times already as I unload the dishwasher and clean up things I don’t want to clean up. And she was right, it was weird, but also comforting. I really do everything I do because I want to take care of my family. Which is how I love God, by obeying the call of marriage and homemaking.
Overall a good book that I definitely recommend. I didn’t give it 5 stars simply because it is so saturated with her Catholic faith that at times it made it a little hard for me to relate. Again, that’s not a problem, she’s allowed to write what she wants :)
October 20, 2022
I loved this book because I could relate to her personal story and personality in so many ways so it was encouraging and challenging to me in my areas of weakness. Also, as a Christian non-catholic I learned a lot from the catholic culture and tradition that has strengthened my own understanding of calling and commitment to calling, as the Catholic Church has a long history of faithful, committed saints which she draws from in developing her own understanding of calling as a mother and how to practically live this out.
It is a very practical book. But, if you are considering reading it I recommend reading other more detailed reviews as her practical suggestions are wrapped up in a very detailed system that I eagerly adopted but I’m not sure her practical advice would be helpful without embracing the whole system. So, a good read if it’s what you’re looking for. Possibly not worth reading if you aren’t open to her rigorous system of home and life management.
It is a very practical book. But, if you are considering reading it I recommend reading other more detailed reviews as her practical suggestions are wrapped up in a very detailed system that I eagerly adopted but I’m not sure her practical advice would be helpful without embracing the whole system. So, a good read if it’s what you’re looking for. Possibly not worth reading if you aren’t open to her rigorous system of home and life management.
June 7, 2024
I gave this book four stars for the reason of its value as a great resource for managing one’s home and family in a structured, inspired way, all while elevating homemaking, as a wife and mother, to the true honourable calling that it is. Holly’s journey of healing in her vocation was inspiring. I am a non Catholic Christian, though, and found the volume of Catholic content to be tedious and, though some of it can be applied to a Protestant Christian’s journey, much of it I could not. I understand we write as we are inspired and thus place no criticism on this book or the author. Just be warned that if you are not Catholic, you may want to only skim through this book for its many valuable nuggets, or find a different one to read…
June 12, 2022
Regula de viață a unei mame este construită în jurul a cinci priorități. În ordine: rugăciunea, propria persoană, soțul, maternitatea și susținerea familiei. Când fiecare prioritate este tratată cu responsabilitate și perseverență, lucrurile se așază în fiecare casă, familie.
Nu am împărtășit toate viziunile autoarei asupra vieții și credinței și unele exemple nu m-au convins (sau organizările casei care nu mi se potrivesc), dar am extras foarte multe principii folositoare și exemple de obiceiuri utile de implementat în propria viață sau în viața familiei noastre.
Nu am împărtășit toate viziunile autoarei asupra vieții și credinței și unele exemple nu m-au convins (sau organizările casei care nu mi se potrivesc), dar am extras foarte multe principii folositoare și exemple de obiceiuri utile de implementat în propria viață sau în viața familiei noastre.
December 15, 2018
A book written for me!!
October 24, 2022
This book took me a while to get through because initially I just couldn’t get into it, but this time around, I was a little more convicted. I loved her 5 Ps order, and it’s something I want to strive for. I found some things difficult to relate to (she’s a stay at home mom, how she relays submission to her husband), but despite it all, she gave sound advice. I found the last chapter very spiritually motivating in my vocation and relationships. I think my real rating is a 3.5/5 ⭐️.
October 6, 2021
This book is for Catholic mothers seeking to live out their vocation. It covers identities of daughter of God, wife, and mother. Pierlot suggests that just as religious have a rule of life to orient them to their mission from God, so should mothers. She details out how to go about setting a rule. The most important take away for me was the ending chapters where she spends time on the importance of having a rule and the peace God can bring about in a heart seeking obedience to Him. I feel that some of the beginning of the book could have been condensed and placed after this.
Pierlot uses 5 focus points for a mother’s rule which I loved. In order of importance in a mother’s life:
1) Prayer
2) Person (self)
3) Partner (spouse)
4) Parent
5) Provider (for working and stay at home mothers)
I find this order crucial to my day and even though I may not get around to setting my own schedule according to her suggestions, I will remember these and try to prioritize my life in this order. Pierlot has written a chapter for each of these in her book.
I benefited significantly from her discussion of sloth and I feel like this could have been pulled to the front of the book and made its own chapter.
Overall, I think that this book needed to be written (and I needed to read it) but it got a little drawn out. I believe I could benefit from reading it again although I dread that a bit. And I think setting a schedule like Pierlot suggests is reasonable but daunting.
Pierlot uses 5 focus points for a mother’s rule which I loved. In order of importance in a mother’s life:
1) Prayer
2) Person (self)
3) Partner (spouse)
4) Parent
5) Provider (for working and stay at home mothers)
I find this order crucial to my day and even though I may not get around to setting my own schedule according to her suggestions, I will remember these and try to prioritize my life in this order. Pierlot has written a chapter for each of these in her book.
I benefited significantly from her discussion of sloth and I feel like this could have been pulled to the front of the book and made its own chapter.
Overall, I think that this book needed to be written (and I needed to read it) but it got a little drawn out. I believe I could benefit from reading it again although I dread that a bit. And I think setting a schedule like Pierlot suggests is reasonable but daunting.
December 19, 2024
La inceput a parut o lectura simpla si ma tot i trebam daca are rost sa citesc pagina cu pagina sau mai bine fusaresc un pic restul cartii. Dupa care a inceput sa relateze povestea ei de viata si felul in care "regula" a ajutat-o sa isi puna in ordine nu doar casa si treburile de sotie si mama, ci propria viata spirituala. E o carte la care ma voi intoarce de multe ori pentru a reciti diverse pasaje 😌 si pentru a-mi scrie propria "regula" de viata. Recomand cartea!
P.S.Mi-a placut mult traducerea doamnei Sechelea, pastreaza ritmul lecturii din varianta in engleza (ceea ce nu gasesti in orice carte tradusa din engleza).
P.S.Mi-a placut mult traducerea doamnei Sechelea, pastreaza ritmul lecturii din varianta in engleza (ceea ce nu gasesti in orice carte tradusa din engleza).
October 31, 2007
We all need prioritizing. This book helped me because Holly was at the point January 1, 1998 that I was at when I picked it up--thinking I couldn't do anymore and needed help.
I learned from her that one has to give ALL one's heart to raising children. She expected things to work, but then saw how there were ways she wasn't giving all her energy to finding solutions.
www.mothersruleoflife.com
I learned from her that one has to give ALL one's heart to raising children. She expected things to work, but then saw how there were ways she wasn't giving all her energy to finding solutions.
www.mothersruleoflife.com
April 26, 2013
A must read for Catholic homeschooling moms!! It only got four stars from me because I think it could lead some women to discouragement if their home life/spirituality don't quite match up. If you read it with realistic expectations, it could be an immensely helpful resource!
March 1, 2025
Color my judgy butt improved for having read a book I was skeptical of. This book does not fall to any of the saccharine sweet or semi-condescending tropes of Christian women’s self help content. Instead it is a solid, often wise look at how we can use the monastic concept of a Rule, aka a philosophy of vocation paired with a daily rhythm, to be fulfilled in our day to day.
My only critique is that she falls into a common mistake for the Christian homeschool mom of undervaluing the appropriateness of greater community support- there is little encouragement of vocational fulfillment and scheduled space for other social needs, and there is an over reliance on the family as the only place of social fulfillment in the day to day. However, she is very careful to say that to meet the personal needs is a deeply personal process, and this leaves space for those of us who find it important to focus on communal integration.
My only critique is that she falls into a common mistake for the Christian homeschool mom of undervaluing the appropriateness of greater community support- there is little encouragement of vocational fulfillment and scheduled space for other social needs, and there is an over reliance on the family as the only place of social fulfillment in the day to day. However, she is very careful to say that to meet the personal needs is a deeply personal process, and this leaves space for those of us who find it important to focus on communal integration.
September 12, 2025
Holly gives a detailed instruction on gaining discipline and order and peace in your life (specifically for moms who are at home most of the time or only work part time) by carefully analyzing what God is calling for you to do in every aspect of home life, spiritual life, parenthood, marriage etc., and then planning for all of it so that it happens on purpose instead of randomly as you feel like it. Though the book suggests an incredibly rigorous and detailed rule of life that may not be necessary to the extent Holly herself implements it, the general points of assessing different aspects of your life and creating more purposeful plans and structure can give great benefit to most people. It has definitely inspired me to take a look at certain areas of my life as a mom (especially my own health and spiritual needs) as needs not just wants, to avoid burnout and create a peaceful home. She gives some tough love, but for myself who also struggles with sloth sometimes, it was a needed challenge and will hopefully inspire me to more self discipline that will benefit the whole family.
September 18, 2018
This was life-changing for me. I can't recommend it to everyone, as it will probably only appeal to a very specific audience (since the author is writing from a Catholic homeschooling perspective), although I think that every woman of faith could benefit from the ideas in it. But I read it after an extremely tumultuous time in my life and it inspired me to make a number of changes that I had never considered before.
I had tried making a complete schedule for my time in the past, but never so complete, and never governed by my priorities and values in the same way. Because of reading this book, I now have a fuller, more robust prayer life, my husband and I figured out how to go on multiple dates per month, the kids have a structured routine and are happier, and I exercise almost every day. Now I sound like an infomercial! But really, most importantly, having a Rule to govern my life frees up my mind and will to serve God more intentionally.
I had tried making a complete schedule for my time in the past, but never so complete, and never governed by my priorities and values in the same way. Because of reading this book, I now have a fuller, more robust prayer life, my husband and I figured out how to go on multiple dates per month, the kids have a structured routine and are happier, and I exercise almost every day. Now I sound like an infomercial! But really, most importantly, having a Rule to govern my life frees up my mind and will to serve God more intentionally.
March 5, 2024
The idea of a “Mother’s Rule of Life” and centering priorities around her vocation is invaluable! I found this book to be a great resource even though it’s very heavily catholic and I, as a Protestant, disagreed with several parts where she got theological and preachy. However, this book is still a great tool to use regardless as long as you discern throughout. This is definitely great to have as a physical copy to reference back to if you choose to write out her recommendations in a notebook.
September 29, 2019
I tried to read this a few years ago, and it just wasn't the right time for me. However, this time it resonated strongly with me. Read with discernment on what is best for your own family situation. You don't have to do everything just as she did
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