Santa vs. Satan Santa vs. Satan Santa vs. Satan

by Jake Kalish

"Who would win between . . ." has through the ages been one of man's most fundamental questions. Sadly, adult responsibilities like “earning a living” and "having a girlfriend" have conspired to make it impossible for men to devote to this issue the scholarship it so deeply deserves. But now one hero has tapped into our ­need to know who's the best, the strongest, the caveman with the biggest club.
From Jake Kalish, five-star general of the Imaginary Battlefield, emerges "Santa vs. Satan," a tome that offers far more than idle speculation, culling expert analysis from martial arts masters, scientists, social theorists, and pop-culture philosophers, providing in-depth detail of the strengths and vulnerabilities of the combatants, and making bold predictions. Warriors are profiled and winners are declared in this seminal list of throwdowns that never were but should have been. Han Solo vs. Indiana Jones
Adam vs. Charles Darwin
The Virgin vs. The Whore
Drunk vs. Stoner
Conspiracy Theorists vs. Conspirators
Muhammad Ali vs. Bruce Lee
The Stork vs. The Grim Reaper
Metrosexual vs. Eunuch
Michael Corleone vs. Tony Montana
Small Man with Breasts vs. Large Balding Woman
Artist vs. Critic
The Constipated vs. The Incontinent
Gandalf vs. Obi-Wan Kenobi
Married Gay Couple vs. Divorced Straight Couple

"From the Trade Paperback edition."

Genres: Humor, Fiction

ebook

First published January 1, 2008

Reviews

[Sara · Rating 1 out of 5]

Like Maxim, only boring and predictable.

[Dustin · Rating 4 out of 5]

The title pulled me in; the jokes kept me reading. While a few of the results were debatable, I especially appreciate the expert analyses of several of the battles, even if the author completely ignored them when choosing a winner. I can see a sequel coming out of this.

[Mike · Rating 3 out of 5]

Just as obnoxious and somewhat campy as you'd expect. Pretty misogynistic and homophobic at times, but a fighting book written by an obvious ex-frat boy would likely be expected to have such overtones.

[Matt Miles · Rating 2 out of 5]

I read this before the depressing increase of this grade school line of thinking in so-called adult conversation thanks to the popularity of superhero movies. It was amusing when I read it, but not so much now.

[Kevin · Rating 1 out of 5]

Some fights were marginal but this book has not aged well in 20 years. It’s amazing how discrimination was tolerated at the time.

[Joanna Perkins]

Good "bathroom book."