What Would Kinky Do?: How to Unscrew a Screwed Up World

by Kinky Friedman

Kinky Friedman, who would be our contemporary Will Rogers if Will Rogers had been Jewish, smoked cigars, and foolish enough to believe he could govern the great state of Texas, returns with this collection of hilariously raunchy, sometimes poignant, and always insightful essays. With fearless wit and wisdom born from many a late night's experience, Kinky offers both pearls and cowpats that touch on life, death, and everything in between.

Considering the current predicament of our nation and the world at large, the question is, "What would Kinky do?" His answers invoke Willie Nelson, Bob Dylan, Judy Garland, George Bush, and other cultural touchstones; reflect on Texas etiquette, smoking in bars, mullet haircuts, immigration policy, and how Don Imus died for our sins; and advise on how to handle a nonstop talker on a long flight, how to deliver the perfect air kiss, and what to do when a redneck hollers "Hey y'all, watch this!"

Whether he's "the new Mark Twain" ( Southern Living ), "in a class with Oscar Wilde, Mark Twain, Will Rogers, and, yes, Henny Youngman" ( The New York Post ), "a Texas legend" (President George W. Bush), or "the Mother Teresa of literature" (Willie Nelson), Kinky Friedman is an outrageously funny and uncommonly smart observer of our common predicament: life and what to do about it.

A little friendly advice from "Texas for Dummies"

*Get you some brontosaurus-foreskin boots and a big ol' cowboy hat. Always remember, only two kinds of people can get away with wearing their hats indoors: cowboys and Jews. Try to be one of them.

*Get your hair fixed right. If you're male, cut it into a "mullet" (short on the sides and top, long in the back---think Billy Ray Cyrus). If you're female, make it as big as possible, with lots of teasing and hair spray. If you can hide a buck knife in there, you're ready.

*Buy you a big ol' pickup truck or a Cadillac. I myself drive a Yom Kippur Clipper. That's a Jewish Cadillac---stops on a dime and picks it up.

*Don't be surprised to find small plastic bags of giant dill pickles in local convenience stores.

*Everything goes better with picante sauce. No exceptions.

*Don't tell us how you did it up there. Nobody cares.

Genres: Nonfiction, Humor, Essays

288 pages, Kindle Edition

First published June 24, 2008

About the author

Richard S. "Kinky" Friedman is an American singer, songwriter, novelist, humorist, politician and former columnist for Texas Monthly who styles himself in the mold of popular American satirists Will Rogers and Mark Twain. He was one of two independent candidates in the 2006 election for the office of Governor of Texas. Receiving 12.6% of the vote, Friedman placed fourth in the six-person race.

Friedman was born in Chicago to Jewish parents, Dr. S. Thomas Friedman and his wife Minnie (Samet) Friedman. The family moved to a ranch in central Texas a few years later. Friedman had an early interest in both music and chess, and was chosen at age 7 as one of 50 local players to challenge U.S. grandmaster Samuel Reshevsky to simultaneous matches in Houston. Reshevsky won all 50 matches, but Friedman was by far the youngest competitor.

Friedman graduated from Austin High School in Austin, Texas in 1962 and earned a Bachelor of Arts from the University of Texas at Austin in 1966, majoring in Psychology. He took part in the Plan II Honors program and was a member of the Tau Delta Phi fraternity. During his freshman year, Chinga Chavin gave Friedman the nickname "Kinky" because of his curly hair.

Friedman served two years in the United States Peace Corps, teaching on Borneo in Malaysia with John Gross. During his service in the Peace Corps, he met future Texas Jewboy road manager Dylan Ferrero, with whom he still works today. Friedman lives at Echo Hill Ranch, his family's summer camp near Kerrville, Texas. He founded Utopia Animal Rescue Ranch, also located near Kerrville, whose mission is to care for stray, abused and aging animals; more than 1,000 dogs have been saved from animal euthanasia.

Series:
* Kinky Friedman Mystery

Reviews

[Chris Irwin Davis · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is a collection of magazine articles and essays that have been grouped by topic. Kinky's writing is top notch, but this book could have been edited much better. There is a *lot* of overlap in certain incidents being recounted more than once. This was exacerbated by the way the stories were grouped together, forcing the reader to encounter the duplications in proximity to each other.

[Gary Glade · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is not one of Kinky’s novels, which are much more entertaining, but a collection of essays by the Kinkster. I know he wrote a column in the Texas Monthly for a time, and I assume these are sampling of those essays. They are not all winners. Some are quite funny, well written anecdotes, some entertaining educational facts about Texas, and some are just dull or vulgar or aimless. Some of Kinky’s jokes I have heard before, but most of the time, he is interesting, witty, creative, and often hilarious. If you have not read Kinky before, I would advise you to start on one his novels like When the Cat’s Away or Armadillos and Old Lace.
I loved Kinky. He was crass, crude, offensive, insulting, yet insightful, intelligent, well written and well read, he knew everybody, was funny as hell, but short tempered and Texas through and through. I will miss him. He was quite a character. He signed this book to me, “for Gary, Yours in Christ, Kinky Friedman.”. I had him sign a Kinky for Governor poster to me on another occasion which he signed “for Gary, See you in Hell, Kinky Friedman”. I don’t think so, but Rest in Peace Kinky.

[Suzanne · Rating 4 out of 5]

For the followers and fans of Kinky Friedman, this collection of essays gives yet another sarcastic glimpse into the many people of whom the characters in his many mysteries were based. With his usual cynical view of the world and his irreverent writing style, Kinky doesn’t disappoint with this neatly packaged montage. Accompanied by the cartoons of John Callahan, this anthology evokes many a laugh with the proverbial tongue in cheek humor. Reading like an audio narrative, Kinky divulges his wit and wisdom and is directed at those who take life way to seriously. Four cups of sarcastic audaciTEA accompanied by a dill pickle.

[Bobby H · Rating 1 out of 5]

What Would Kinky Do to fall asleep? Read read this book. If you are into mindless celebrity name-dropping bla bla bla, you might like it. But is fails for me on social commentary, humor, autobiography, heck interesting reading.
I hope his other books are better.

[Kelly · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was just as good the second time. I’m glad I got to meet him before he stepped on a rainbow. RIP Kinky.

[Jamie · Rating 3 out of 5]

A Kinky Collection indeed - If you are fan of Mr Friedman, you might want to pick it up. It references all of the real life people some of his characters in his mystery series are based off of, which I enjoyed. Some of the political essays were very funny too. However, there were several essays that I found a bit rambling and not sure where they were going. It is probably good information to know that Willie Nelson is one of his good friends and his might have been victim of a contact buzz at times. ; )

[Katy-Del · Rating 3 out of 5]

I love books that read like you are sitting listening to someone tell stories. That's what this book is. Each chapter is a new story or rumination. We get stories about Willie Nelson, Kinky's parents, life, his dogs, the governr race. The book is all over the place, but I don't think that's a bad thing.

[Judy · Rating 2 out of 5]

I'm not a fan of short stories so this book had that against it going in. It read like listening to someone recount stories of their past: mildly interesting, terrible redundant but a nice way to pass time. I much prefer Kinky's fiction.

[Jeff Brailey · Rating 3 out of 5]

A regurgitation of many previously published essays and articles. Humorous, but often redundant.

[Christie · Rating 3 out of 5]

Kinky is exploring how he came to be a progressive, and how he can advise people to live better lives. I think Kinky's politics are correct and he is a great writer.

[Danni · Rating 4 out of 5]

I've read all Kinky's mysteries - these were the first essays I've read. This had me laughing out loud on the subway.

[Mike Horne · Rating 2 out of 5]

Not bad Kinky Friedman. But I rather read his novels. If you have never read him, not a bad place to start. But you don't have to start.

[Claire · Rating 3 out of 5]

Cracked me up a good bit.

[Lori Urban]

Oh the "Kinkster"... I love his books they just make so much sense.

[Sara Goldenberg · Rating 4 out of 5]

I have ready just about all his books. I like most of them.

However, after you read a few of them, you will see whole parts repeat themselves; I guess for the new readers. It's pretty tiresome.

So, in this spirit, I will post this exact review on each of his books that I recently read.