So, Umm... Do "white people" like this book?
No, they don't. They liked the idea of the website before it was created, and may have even laughed at one of the references when they were in on the joke before you. But by the time the site hit the web, it was old news, and they'd moved on to newer and/or older, less mainstream entertainment. Like reading blogs devoted to "How to wear your multiple knotted scarves in ways different from everyone else." And now that I've just drawn attention to that, the search for the newest and/or oldest obscurity is on again.
Seriously though... This book sucked. It wasn't funny, and it was extremely repetitive. The only thing that changed was the item that was liked, and the rest of the chapter, every chapter, was pretty much exactly the same. Or so it seemed to me as I zoned out while listening to this on audio. It was like one big Find & Replace exercise for Lander to write it, I bet.
But, even so, there were things that I identified with in this book. Just not the way he says I do, or should. Or whatever.
I like coffee: Fucking Folgers, with cream and sugar. And I enjoy Starbucks coffee, but I don't soil myself and act like my purgatory on a desert island is finally, finally at an end when I see a store. I don't order drinks that take longer to name than my wait in line to get to the counter took.
I like New York City: It's a fun city with lots of shit to do and see and shit. But I don't act like a douchebag about it and pretend like my having been there makes me some sort of expert. I don't want to live there, like I'm supposed to, apparently, as a "white person". And I'm pretty sure that having a favorite place to eat is allowed, even if other people have heard of it. Like, my friend and I went to this Irish Pub/Diner that I'm sure MILLIONS of other people have dined at, and it was awesome and I'd love to go back. This time I'll have the whiskey with my french toast.
I like the environment, and I wish I'd bought a Prius or something. At least a hybrid. I like sushi, public radio, Farmer's Markets, 80s music, "having black friends" & "having gay friends" (although in my life, it's just called "having friends"). I like non-profits, tea, The Daily Show, Netflix, diversity, The Simpsons, and hope that when I have kids, they are fucking gifted and multilingual because that would be awesome. And I fucking love books, but more, I love READING them**. (And god, the "White Annotated Bibliography" section? Seriously? This dude is a douche. He makes literacy look like something dirty and shameful.)
The undercurrent in the book is that I should like these things because I feel like they make me better, quirkier or more unique than other "white people", when in fact the joke is on me, because it just makes me the same as them. Har har har. Derp.
Apparently, I should feel shame at liking the things I do. And, one would guess, for disliking the things I do too, because what self-respecting middle class "white person" doesn't love Oscar parties, expensive strollers, McSweeney's, "the idea of soccer" aka a reason to buy a scarf (seriously?!), outdoor performance clothes, or Wes Anderson movies? For shame! [For realsies though, I had to google who Wes Anderson even was (-10 white points) and then when I found out, I just laughed, because of the two I've ever tried to watch, Rushmore and The Royal Tenenbaums, I made it about a combined 45 minutes before wishing I could suddenly be struck blind. People actually LIKE those movies? I'll just remove myself from the list of White People right now, because that shit isn't gonna happen. I don't think I could bring myself to even FINISH one, let alone like it. Snoozeville.]
I was ready to read this and laugh, because I'm into self-deprecating humor as much as the next "white person", a topic which is sadly missing from this book... but I hear there's a sequel!, but umm... no. When making people laugh, it generally helps if there's something funny.
"Stuff White People Like"? Fail.
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**Except this one.