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Sexual Intimacy for Women: A Guide for Same-Sex Couples
Sexual Intimacy for Women helps female couples examine the emotional, physical, and psychological aspects of their relationships, with the goal of creating more intimacy. Exercises and client-based anecdotes from Dr. Corwin’s years of experience with same-sex couples help women overcome common issues around orgasm, body image, identity, aging, and parenthood. Dr. Corwin dispels myths, examines the intricacies of female desire, and gives advice to help couples achieve long-lasting, healthy, and fulfilling relationships.
288 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 2010
About the author
Glenda Corwin
1 book4 followersDr. Glenda Corwin is a clinical psychologist who has been in private practice for twenty years. She specializes in sexual intimacy issues for women in same-sex relationships. She lives in Atlanta, GA.
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Displaying 1 - 11 of 11 reviews
September 29, 2015
This book is not a "sex book" is a relationship book. I think that's important for anyone looking into reading it to understand.
Secondly, it is written by a sex therapist. Thus, the message it sends is about having a healthy sexual relationship (sexual intimate relationship) with your partner. The author approaches intimacy as a choice rather than an act that must be made because your in a serious relationship. After reading other marriage books, I interpreted this as the choice to show your partner your love through an intimate sexual relationship.
The book addresses the idea of a "Lesbian death bed" and uses the word "asexual" to describe a committed long term relationship without sex. It explains the differences in sexual desire from a biological perspective and describes what Spontaneous sexual drive (what we normally think of sex. It comes with the moment as a biological or physiological response; much like men I guess) versus Responsive sex drive (the conscious choice to get oneself aroused and begin a sexual act).
The book then addresses some topics that may or may not apply to you. Is in this section that I have the most trouble with. The examples she provides are not presented in a way that drive her point into your brain. I did not like her examples at all. She made it seem like being in a relationship is nothing more than having a sexual partner. I don't think it was "judgy" but I do think it was one-sided towards a sex therapist view point instead of a general marriage and family perspective. She never mentioned commitment, trust, respect, in the sense of being in a relationship. In addition, the part about sexual abuse I think needed more substance! Perhaps more research on her part. As a survivor, I Personally felt offended by some of her comments. But I kept on reading because she did present valid points in the last third of the book.
She ended the book with a discussion about sexual communication among partners and orgasms as well as fantasies. I found it helpful coming from a very conservative somewhat close-minded and judgmental cultured family that viewed sex as taboo and something I must keep quiet about. I made the choice to read the book because I feel my previous trauma coupled with my family/cultured/ religious beliefs about sex being "bad" make a formula for a bad sex life and a long relationship lived in the dark.
Overall, I think the author should have partnered up with a psychologist (marriage and family as well as trauma certified preferably) to write a more accurate portrayed of intimate relationships both sexual and emotional. I feel this book would have been much much more insightful if only that information was added or better presented with an emphasis on sexual intimacy of course (because THAT is why I bought the book).
I will recommended as a lesbian reading book but it must be coupled with other relationship books to have a broader understanding.
Secondly, it is written by a sex therapist. Thus, the message it sends is about having a healthy sexual relationship (sexual intimate relationship) with your partner. The author approaches intimacy as a choice rather than an act that must be made because your in a serious relationship. After reading other marriage books, I interpreted this as the choice to show your partner your love through an intimate sexual relationship.
The book addresses the idea of a "Lesbian death bed" and uses the word "asexual" to describe a committed long term relationship without sex. It explains the differences in sexual desire from a biological perspective and describes what Spontaneous sexual drive (what we normally think of sex. It comes with the moment as a biological or physiological response; much like men I guess) versus Responsive sex drive (the conscious choice to get oneself aroused and begin a sexual act).
The book then addresses some topics that may or may not apply to you. Is in this section that I have the most trouble with. The examples she provides are not presented in a way that drive her point into your brain. I did not like her examples at all. She made it seem like being in a relationship is nothing more than having a sexual partner. I don't think it was "judgy" but I do think it was one-sided towards a sex therapist view point instead of a general marriage and family perspective. She never mentioned commitment, trust, respect, in the sense of being in a relationship. In addition, the part about sexual abuse I think needed more substance! Perhaps more research on her part. As a survivor, I Personally felt offended by some of her comments. But I kept on reading because she did present valid points in the last third of the book.
She ended the book with a discussion about sexual communication among partners and orgasms as well as fantasies. I found it helpful coming from a very conservative somewhat close-minded and judgmental cultured family that viewed sex as taboo and something I must keep quiet about. I made the choice to read the book because I feel my previous trauma coupled with my family/cultured/ religious beliefs about sex being "bad" make a formula for a bad sex life and a long relationship lived in the dark.
Overall, I think the author should have partnered up with a psychologist (marriage and family as well as trauma certified preferably) to write a more accurate portrayed of intimate relationships both sexual and emotional. I feel this book would have been much much more insightful if only that information was added or better presented with an emphasis on sexual intimacy of course (because THAT is why I bought the book).
I will recommended as a lesbian reading book but it must be coupled with other relationship books to have a broader understanding.
July 16, 2015
It was okay. I was bothered by the author's misunderstanding of asexuality (getting it wrong in chapter one is a bit disconcerning) and what I felt was a lot of shaming women with low sex drives or who don't want to have sex.
I understand this is a book for helping women be sexually intimate together, but it should come from a place of desire and not scolding. If someone's true nature involves not wanting sex (again look at how she wrongly defines asexuality) than there are other options in place, such as opening up the relationship. To my memory, she doesn't discuss that at all.
There is some good advice here but it's wrapped up in a blanket of judgement and the implication that everyone should be having sex, regardless of personal preference.
I understand this is a book for helping women be sexually intimate together, but it should come from a place of desire and not scolding. If someone's true nature involves not wanting sex (again look at how she wrongly defines asexuality) than there are other options in place, such as opening up the relationship. To my memory, she doesn't discuss that at all.
There is some good advice here but it's wrapped up in a blanket of judgement and the implication that everyone should be having sex, regardless of personal preference.
June 16, 2019
This is an intriguing book, filled with a brief history of lesbian sexual relations, personal stories, and stories from her patients. At the end of each chapter, Corwin poses a few questions to ask one's self, and one's partner in order to get a dialogue going on how to best communicate and understand each other. After all, relationships are hard work!
In trying to help lesbians avoid bed death, Corwin discusses a plethora of topics that may prevent fun times in the bedroom, such as sexual desire, identity, self-image, parenthood, and more. How do these topics create tension between two women and why? And what conversations should they perhaps be having in order to get back in bed?
Overall, this was well-researched and evidently supported by her own personal experiences with her clients. It's informative, educational, and provides a really great outline on how to have difficult conversations with one's partner.
Review cross-listed here!
In trying to help lesbians avoid bed death, Corwin discusses a plethora of topics that may prevent fun times in the bedroom, such as sexual desire, identity, self-image, parenthood, and more. How do these topics create tension between two women and why? And what conversations should they perhaps be having in order to get back in bed?
Overall, this was well-researched and evidently supported by her own personal experiences with her clients. It's informative, educational, and provides a really great outline on how to have difficult conversations with one's partner.
Review cross-listed here!
April 27, 2021
Good, practical book on sexual relationships between women. It covers quite a few topics, from body image and pregnancy to sexual abuse and trauma. The most helpful advice in this book, for me, is to be intentional about sex. Too many of us become ashamed when we don’t have spontaneous desire for sex. I also enjoyed Dr. Corwin’s numerous examples and sensitive way of writing about these issues.
Since it was written just over a decade ago, the book is now a bit dated (we’ve made a lot of progress these last few years), but it is worth adding to your list.
Since it was written just over a decade ago, the book is now a bit dated (we’ve made a lot of progress these last few years), but it is worth adding to your list.
September 11, 2022
Any AFAB individual should read this to replace the incorrect or blatant lack of sexual education in even grown adults. Those who are sapphic would especially benefit from reading this. Incredible book. I learned so much.
April 4, 2018
Loved this!
I share this book with every Lesbian I meet. It's important to talk about sex and what it means to oneself.
I share this book with every Lesbian I meet. It's important to talk about sex and what it means to oneself.
January 25, 2020
Excellent information. A very good insight on what are fantasies and a true point of view of what is sex about.
December 23, 2016
Highly recommend that every woman in a same-sex arrangement read this very well written and organized guide. In fact, I believe that even straight females would benefit from some of the insights presented. The author, Dr. Glenda Corwin, does an amazing job weaving together the heart, body, and mind of both partners to encourage a closer sexual bond and longer lasting relationship. XOXOXOs to Glenda:)
August 22, 2013
For a full review please visit: http://intimacytoolbox.com/2013/02/22...
...You don’t have to be a lesbian to take something home from this quick and enjoyable read. Learn where the term “lesbian bed death” originated from. Challenge yourself by responding to questions at the end of each chapter. Think of “spontaneous sex” in different ways. Normalize your sexuality and challenge yourself to try something new. Read clinical examples about individuals and couples to enrich your understanding of the material presented. There are few books about lesbian sexuality; fortunately, this book is a good one.
...You don’t have to be a lesbian to take something home from this quick and enjoyable read. Learn where the term “lesbian bed death” originated from. Challenge yourself by responding to questions at the end of each chapter. Think of “spontaneous sex” in different ways. Normalize your sexuality and challenge yourself to try something new. Read clinical examples about individuals and couples to enrich your understanding of the material presented. There are few books about lesbian sexuality; fortunately, this book is a good one.
July 18, 2012
Despite the title, this really isn't a sex manual but a really good relationship manual. It covers pretty much every topic you should discuss with your partner and includes discussion questions at the end of each chapter. I'd recommend this for lesbian couples that are thinking about a permanent relationship. It's a good way to get communicating about all the things that can affect an intimate relationship.
June 1, 2013
Loved this book. Yes, like any self-help/therapy book, there are points that I disagreed with, and there were sections of the book not relevant to my situation. But as a whole, Corwin does a great job addressing lesbian-specific relationship issues and has real life stories and homework of sorts to work through the issue. Definitely recommend.
Displaying 1 - 11 of 11 reviews