Fathering Your School-Age Child: A Dad's Guide to the Wonder Years

by Armin A. Brott

A practical handbook on all aspects of fatherhood during the third to the ninth year (pre-K through the fourth grade) by the best-selling, critically acclaimed author of The Expectant Father Following the success of the three previous volumes in this series― The Expectant Father, The New Father: A Dad's Guide to the First Year and Fathering Your Toddler ―this book is similarly packed with facts, tips, and advice on all aspects of fatherhood. When is it the best time to encourage a child's independence? What's the difference between daycare vs. preschool? What are the unique ways fathers impact their youngster's life? The answers to these questions and hundreds more are found in the pages of this easy-to-follow, informative volume.

With wisdom, compassion, and humor, author Armin Brott devotes a chapter to each school year from prekindergarten through the fourth grade. In each chapter he outlines the physical, intellectual, emotional, and social changes the child is going though, and examines the emotional and psychological development the father may be experiencing. He also discusses issues that develop between dad and mom as well as matters that involve the whole family. In addition, each chapter contains a section called "You and Your Child," in which activities and issues appropriate to the given age are discussed. Other topics cover the latest research on child development, including brain growth, good and bad news about watching television, and the use of computers and other technology. There is ample advice for dads who are older, single, divorced, in the military, stepfathers, and stay-at-home dads, and the book incorporates the author's and other fathers' personal experiences, as well as the advice of top researchers in the field.

Illustrated throughout with delightful New Yorker cartoons that underscore the universality of the joys and woes of parenting, Fathering Your School-Age Child is an essential sourcebook for every dad. It's certain to give every mom helpful insights as well.

Genres: Parenting, Nonfiction

255 pages, Hardcover

First published January 1, 2007

Reviews

[Dakota · Rating 5 out of 5]

Good book. This is not the first book in Armin Brott’s series that I’ve read. I’m used to how he writes and the detours he takes and how he breaks up the book.

Here are some general thoughts thus far on the book (as I have not read each chapter, only the chapter at my child’s age, along with one year forward and behind). Overall the book is good (especially for fathers). It will either make you think of something you haven’t thought of before, or it will reaffirm something you already know. For example, it was clear to me that both boys and girls (generally) will have more physical play with their father than with their mother (the book mentioned this). However, knowing that my child should be able to tie their shoe by now isn’t something that I really thought about. It gave me the prompt that I needed to bring this up to my child and teach them how to tie their shoes. The book is full of these good reminders (things that you know but are too busy sometimes to initiate or think about). Chapters aren’t fully about the child though, they include information about yourself (and what you might be thinking or worried about) as well as sections on you and your partner (good reminders on how to keep your relationship close, intimate, special, and fun).

For parents/children who are in unique situations (divorce, learning disabilities, physical ailments, army couples, etc), they will also find help in this book. Armin dedicates particular pages to these situations. For someone who doesn’t find them penitent to their life, they can just skip over them, but for those who can resonate with them, it is really helpful and shows that Armin is trying to cast a wide net here.

In terms of what to take away from this book, I wouldn’t worry about every little thing in here. For example, it mentions that my child should be roller skating by now. I don’t honestly care if my child rollerskates at this age (as I don’t value that skill over other ones I could be teaching my child). You have to match your values/time with those mentioned in this book. It is totally okay if you decide to just gloss over it or “come back to it” when your child is older or you’re at a different point in your life. I would make a list of the items that really resonate with you though, as you will likely forget them once you get back to the real world. Focus on a few items a week, such as teaching your child to brush their teeth, rekindling date nights with your partner, giving yourself some self-care, etc. This was useful to me and helped keep everything in line (and kept me growing as a father).

I really enjoyed this book as it comes from a father’s perspective, which in my opinion is generally ignored or not mentioned too often in the real world. Men/fathers don’t tend to talk much about their responsibilities and issues and this book helps you feel like you have solidarity with al the other dads out there. 5/5 stars. I Would absolutely recommend any dad (or dad to be) to read this, along with the other ones in the franchise.

[Douglas Lord · Rating 5 out of 5]

A best-selling author and father of three, Brott (The Expectant Father) drolly delivers readable, practical guidance on fathering. Covering each year from three to nine, the chapters focus on the developmental states of child, father, and mother/partner as well as their relationships to one other. Considerable knowledge from parenting experts is woven into the text, and special issues (e.g., children with special needs, divorced dads) are also explored. Though there are overlaps in content from the earlier titles in the "Fathering" series (most recently Your Toddler, 2005), the presentation remains fresh. Plenty of appeal comes from Brott's ability to pinpoint when to accomplish certain developmental tasks, e.g., the age range of 5-6 is just the right time to hone toothbrushing and flossing skills. Highly recommended.
Find reviews of books for men at Books for Dudes, Books for Dudes, the online reader's advisory column for men from Library Journal. Copyright Library Journal.

[Chris · Rating 3 out of 5]

I only read the intro and age 3 but the best quote of all is:
"But about halfway through the (3rd) year, your compliant, cooperative, cheerful little angel will become completely possessed. He'll be obstinate, ornery, insecure, anxious and will completely refuse to go along with anything you ask. Fortunately, there's no need to call in an exorcist, as this phase will begin to fade by the end of this year."

Whew! Amy can you relate?

Also has good book references (I was looking for kids' books about preschool and they listed 4) and funny cartoons. Some good insights.

[Greg · Rating 3 out of 5]

This might be a new record for me, the longest amount of time spent reading a single book! At this point, I’m actually finding that the progressiveness I appreciated early on has not aged well. It’s still decent, but lagging behind. I know there are newer editions so perhaps it has kept up in that way. I have enjoyed the tradition of reading a chapter every year and will continue to reread the book until Mason turns nine.

[Bill · Rating 4 out of 5]

Another excellent book in the series by Armin Brott. Great advice for dads.