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Butter My Butt and Call Me a Biscuit: And Other Country Sayings, Say-So's, Hoots and Hollers
They're called colloquialisms, idioms, of just good old fashioned, home-grown country sayings steeped in humor and home-spun common sense. These parlances might not fit the modern hoity toity rhetoric you're used to seeing in print or hearing on TV, and that's exactly why they're more refreshing than an ice cube in July. In Butter My Butt and Call Me a Biscuit , Author Allan Zullo offers up more than 200 vernacular verses presented in themes, such
* Admitting You're Wrong --The easiest way to eat crow is while it's still warm, 'cause the colder it gets the harder it is to swallow.
* Congress --Gettin' a politician to do somethin' good for our country is like tryin' to poke a cat out from under the porch with a rope.
* Ego --Some people are so full of themselves, you'd like to buy 'em for what they're worth and sell 'em for what they think they're worth.
* Teenage Boys --You kinda wish they used their heads for somethin' besides hat racks.
* Revenge --Two wrongs don't make a right, but they sure do make it even.
* Surprises --Sometimes you get so surprised by life there ain't nothin' else to say but, 'Butter my butt and call me a biscuit.'"
* Admitting You're Wrong --The easiest way to eat crow is while it's still warm, 'cause the colder it gets the harder it is to swallow.
* Congress --Gettin' a politician to do somethin' good for our country is like tryin' to poke a cat out from under the porch with a rope.
* Ego --Some people are so full of themselves, you'd like to buy 'em for what they're worth and sell 'em for what they think they're worth.
* Teenage Boys --You kinda wish they used their heads for somethin' besides hat racks.
* Revenge --Two wrongs don't make a right, but they sure do make it even.
* Surprises --Sometimes you get so surprised by life there ain't nothin' else to say but, 'Butter my butt and call me a biscuit.'"
- GenresHumorNonfiction
216 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 2009
3 people are currently reading
153 people want to read
About the author
Allan Zullo
171 books113 followersAllan Zullo is an American non-fiction writer. He is the author or co-author of more than eighty paperbacks for adults and children.
A native of Rockford, Illinois, Zullo graduated from Northern Illinois University in 1969 with a degree in journalism. His books include The Baseball Hall of Shame and Baseball Confidential (both co-written with Bruce Nash), A Boomer's Guide to Grandparenting (co-written with his wife Kathryn), and the Haunted Kids series. Zullo has also written articles for The National Enquirer, The Christian Science Monitor, Ladies Home Journal, and The Palm Beach Post. His syndicated comic strip "The Ghost Story Club" ran in American newspapers from 1995 to 1998.
Zullo currently lives in Fairview, North Carolina.
A native of Rockford, Illinois, Zullo graduated from Northern Illinois University in 1969 with a degree in journalism. His books include The Baseball Hall of Shame and Baseball Confidential (both co-written with Bruce Nash), A Boomer's Guide to Grandparenting (co-written with his wife Kathryn), and the Haunted Kids series. Zullo has also written articles for The National Enquirer, The Christian Science Monitor, Ladies Home Journal, and The Palm Beach Post. His syndicated comic strip "The Ghost Story Club" ran in American newspapers from 1995 to 1998.
Zullo currently lives in Fairview, North Carolina.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 32 reviews
December 30, 2025
Well well well tie me to a pig and roll me in the mud don’t I just have a bunch of new sayings to roll out in 2026! Best $7 I’ve ever spent
August 15, 2023
I got this for my mother for Christmas (nobody tell her), and decided to read it before wrapping it up. I'm glad I did, but I hope she doesn't mind reading a book that someone has already looked at.
This contains a lot of sayings I actually use myself, or variations on them, though I reckon it'd be a novelty for anyone who didn't spend a lot of time in some rural settings. It also had a ton that I'd never heard before, as well as a few that that were too corny, even for me.
There are some questionable compliments (Prettier than a pat of butter meltin' on a short stack?
I guess we should consider the source).
A lazy man will never drown in his own sweat, and often earn the nickname of Blister cause he don't show up until the work is done.
Some people are as useful as an ashtray on a motorcycle, or sorry as a two dollar watch.
If brains were leather, some people wouldn't have enough to saddle a june bug, and couldn't pour rain water out of a boot if the instructions were on the heel.
As far as clothes go, just because they make it don't mean it's for you. You don't want to end up lookin' like 10 pounds of potatoes in a 5 pound sack.
Then there are ugly people who whose mama's took them everywhere they went just so they wouldn't have to kiss them goodbye.
Perhaps you play baseball like me, and couldn't hit a bull in the butt with a bass fiddle?
Or basketball, and if you threw yourself at the ground you'd miss?
It's not all insults, though. There are also some sayings reminiscent of the wisdom of Aesop, though presented with twang.
Lie down with dogs, get up with fleas.
You can't tell the size of a turnip by looking at the top.
Never ask a barber if he thinks you need a haircut.
You can't make chicken salad with chicken feathers.
Some days you're the peacock, other days the feather duster.
Be careful around some people, and count your fingers after you're done shaking hands with them.
If things are going well, you could be fine as snuff and not half as dusty, and good news will sure dill your pickle.
Well, that's enough. I copied several of my favorites, but don't want to put all of them here. I think you should read the book
This contains a lot of sayings I actually use myself, or variations on them, though I reckon it'd be a novelty for anyone who didn't spend a lot of time in some rural settings. It also had a ton that I'd never heard before, as well as a few that that were too corny, even for me.
There are some questionable compliments (Prettier than a pat of butter meltin' on a short stack?
I guess we should consider the source).
A lazy man will never drown in his own sweat, and often earn the nickname of Blister cause he don't show up until the work is done.
Some people are as useful as an ashtray on a motorcycle, or sorry as a two dollar watch.
If brains were leather, some people wouldn't have enough to saddle a june bug, and couldn't pour rain water out of a boot if the instructions were on the heel.
As far as clothes go, just because they make it don't mean it's for you. You don't want to end up lookin' like 10 pounds of potatoes in a 5 pound sack.
Then there are ugly people who whose mama's took them everywhere they went just so they wouldn't have to kiss them goodbye.
Perhaps you play baseball like me, and couldn't hit a bull in the butt with a bass fiddle?
Or basketball, and if you threw yourself at the ground you'd miss?
It's not all insults, though. There are also some sayings reminiscent of the wisdom of Aesop, though presented with twang.
Lie down with dogs, get up with fleas.
You can't tell the size of a turnip by looking at the top.
Never ask a barber if he thinks you need a haircut.
You can't make chicken salad with chicken feathers.
Some days you're the peacock, other days the feather duster.
Be careful around some people, and count your fingers after you're done shaking hands with them.
If things are going well, you could be fine as snuff and not half as dusty, and good news will sure dill your pickle.
Well, that's enough. I copied several of my favorites, but don't want to put all of them here. I think you should read the book
August 30, 2020
Love it. Alot of the old sayings I've heard all my life. There's alot here that I didn't. My book had 424pgs. This one they have didnt.
September 19, 2020
There's some good stuff here, and I'm glad someone decided to collect some of these old sayings and put them together. The book is organized well, and I also appreciate the brief explanations that preface some of the sayings because they give it context and make it easier to understand the intent and meaning. I was born in Alabama, but I had not heard most of the sayings in this book. I think most of these are generational more than regional.
Some of my favorites:
"I'm busier than a set of jumper cables at a family reunion."
"They call him 'Blister' cause he don't show up 'til the work is done."
"He's so ugly, his mama took him everywhere so she wouldn't have to kiss him goodbye."
There's also a few longer jokes that go on for a couple of pages. Some of those were really funny.
Looking back, I wonder how many of these ended up as one-liners on the old "Hee Haw" show that was popular in the 70s and 80s. Good stuff.
Some of my favorites:
"I'm busier than a set of jumper cables at a family reunion."
"They call him 'Blister' cause he don't show up 'til the work is done."
"He's so ugly, his mama took him everywhere so she wouldn't have to kiss him goodbye."
There's also a few longer jokes that go on for a couple of pages. Some of those were really funny.
Looking back, I wonder how many of these ended up as one-liners on the old "Hee Haw" show that was popular in the 70s and 80s. Good stuff.
August 12, 2018
This is a great little book, especially for writers. It'll "add vinegar to your greens" (Southern slang not included in the book) if you curl up in a blanket with it on a winter's night "colder than a well-digger's butt" (another Southern slang not included in the book).
This is just sheer entertainment, really. Take a peek inside Southern culture by taking it for a spin (not a Southern slang, so it correctly wasn't in the book). I was raised by an Arkansas grandmother and have lived in Texas most of my life. This book was joy for me.
This is just sheer entertainment, really. Take a peek inside Southern culture by taking it for a spin (not a Southern slang, so it correctly wasn't in the book). I was raised by an Arkansas grandmother and have lived in Texas most of my life. This book was joy for me.
June 19, 2017
What can you say about a book of country sayings? Well if you like homespun wisdom and wit then belly up to the trough and enjoy. Now My copy is different from this one in that its title is Butter My Butt and Call Me a Biscuit And You're the Butter on My Biscuit. Still it is the same just more of it. What I liked best is it made me laugh as I read it. To anyone, who likes to laugh and think how true, then this is the book for you.
December 19, 2018
I’ve lived in the country but I prefer the city life. Yet there’s a charm about how country people talk. They have some of the funniest sayings. This book has a lot of great sayings and short jokes. Amazingly, some of the sayings in this book I grew up hearing in the country. While I prefer a refined vocabulary, it’s nice to read some care free country talk. This is a fun book to read. Best of all it’s clean. No filth or vulgarity.
January 13, 2020
Encouraged by the first book this year which was super funny, I picked another. There was a time when needed a booklet of jokes to kill the hours on a bus. Maybe this is just what could have been picked at the kiosks in service areas or bus terminals.
Yeah, it's a quick read and quite funny and sometimes more than funny as much to hold your side with laughter. On the other way, it is full of food for thought and also un-heard of idiomatic expressions, which makes confused and rely on the dictionary.
When it gets boring with lots of so-so jokes, you can throw it saying that's enough. But, why? You can be at least most pleased by several funny lines.
Yeah, it's a quick read and quite funny and sometimes more than funny as much to hold your side with laughter. On the other way, it is full of food for thought and also un-heard of idiomatic expressions, which makes confused and rely on the dictionary.
When it gets boring with lots of so-so jokes, you can throw it saying that's enough. But, why? You can be at least most pleased by several funny lines.
December 16, 2021
-3 stars.
some i knew, some were funny, some didnt make sense. colloquialisms.
(to a coworker who doesnt pull their weight) "they call him blister 'cause he don't show up 'til the work is done."
(a dig or cut) "you're not worth the spit it'd take to cuss you out."
(to someone who acts arrogant) "the higher a monkey climbs, the more he shows his butt."
(to someone trying to con you) "dont pee on my leg and tell me its raining."
some i knew, some were funny, some didnt make sense. colloquialisms.
(to a coworker who doesnt pull their weight) "they call him blister 'cause he don't show up 'til the work is done."
(a dig or cut) "you're not worth the spit it'd take to cuss you out."
(to someone who acts arrogant) "the higher a monkey climbs, the more he shows his butt."
(to someone trying to con you) "dont pee on my leg and tell me its raining."
November 22, 2020
This book reminds me of my stepdad since he used so many of these and I didn’t have a clue what he was talking about. He was a Missouri boy and grew up on a farm so this makes sense to me now. So many of these are related to farming more so than being “southern”.
January 12, 2021
Many of these I heard growing up from my grandparents, however, about a good third of them were completely unfamiliar. It's an alright book to flip through, but it's nothing worth writing home about.
November 13, 2021
I received this from a friend who, like me, likes origins of sayings and words.
This book is not a cover-to-cover read. It's just lists of sayings with very little explanation and no origins. It would be cute for someone who likes folksy sayings.
This book is not a cover-to-cover read. It's just lists of sayings with very little explanation and no origins. It would be cute for someone who likes folksy sayings.
September 24, 2024
I wish I'd read this while my grandparents were still alive. Some of these ring like a sour bell, but many brought back memories of the sayings and the characters who said them.
Many thanks to David for this gift.
Many thanks to David for this gift.
January 12, 2018
I loved this book. It was lighthearted, fun, silly, and just warmed my spirit. I’m definitely going to use some of these sayings in my own vocabulary.
December 28, 2018
This was a fun, quick read for the end of 2018. Can I get one more in???
January 10, 2020
Entertaining little book with many "country" sayings. Fun to read.
January 20, 2022
What a hoot!
February 21, 2022
A great bathroom read. There are some gems in here, but a lot of ‘em are pretty silly.
June 30, 2022
Cute book
February 3, 2023
Lots of funny country sayings. some I’ve heard but many are new to me and made me laugh out loud. I had the calendar by the same name and enjoyed every day of it!
August 29, 2023
a small sized book but lots of funny things to read enjoyed it
September 26, 2023
Lots of interesting quotes in here!
March 15, 2024
Fun collection of southern sayings and stories that makes a quick, entertaining read. Nice pocket book for the shelves.
September 15, 2016
Loved it! Had some good ol' country sayings! I am Charleston Girl so some of these I use or have heard but some I have not. A lot of them will make you laugh and some will just make you think. I like that they included some little short stories too!
May 8, 2024
This is a quick read that keeps you wanting more. Many of the phrases that are unique to what we'd call "hillbillies" or "Mountain people" have made their way to big cities like Los Angeles, where I used them growing up. My ancestors must have used them and passed them on to me.
It's not just fun but it's enlightening to see how creative and colorful the language is. I am writing about my ancestors from Appalachia and this helps put me in the mindset!
It's not just fun but it's enlightening to see how creative and colorful the language is. I am writing about my ancestors from Appalachia and this helps put me in the mindset!
February 13, 2016
Some of these were so hilarious. There were anecdotes throughout that were pretty funny, too.
The main problem was repeats. They weren't exact repeats, but when you replace one word with a similar one, then it's pretty much the same thing. Also, the 'hicks from the sticks' stereotype is embraced here, which isn't necessarily synonymous with 'country', so if that offends you, be wary.
The main problem was repeats. They weren't exact repeats, but when you replace one word with a similar one, then it's pretty much the same thing. Also, the 'hicks from the sticks' stereotype is embraced here, which isn't necessarily synonymous with 'country', so if that offends you, be wary.
September 10, 2012
Fun, quick read. Never would have read this, I don think, if it wasn't for my dad. The sayings are great, but I adores the short stories. They always got a laugh out of me.
September 24, 2012
If you need a beak from more serious works, spend an hour or so with this book. Brought forth a chuckle or two.
November 13, 2013
EVERYONE needs this book to keep these Southern phrases alive. Perfect little addition to the coffee table or the "bathroom literature" selection on the back of the commode tank.
July 30, 2014
Funny Stuff
Displaying 1 - 30 of 32 reviews