I Was a Sixth-Grade Zombie

Ghosts of Fear Street #30

by Nina Kiriki Hoffman, R.L. Stine (Creator)

Every kid in Valerie Martin's class has joined a mysterious after-school club, but they can't remember a thing about it. Val begins to investigate and when she uncovers the truth, she may be the next to lose her mind. Original. (Digest)

Genres: Horror, Childrens

117 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 1998

About the author

Nina Kiriki Hoffman’s first solo novel, The Thread That Binds the Bones (1993), won the Bram Stoker Award for first novel; her second novel, The Silent Strength of Stones (1995) was a finalist for the Nebula and World Fantasy Awards. A Red Heart of Memories (1999, part of her “Matt Black” series), nominated for a World Fantasy Award, was followed by sequel Past the Size of Dreaming in 2001. Much of her work to date is short fiction, including “Matt Black” novella “Unmasking” (1992), nominated for a World Fantasy Award; and “Matt Black” novelette “Home for Christmas” (1995), nominated for the Nebula, World Fantasy, and Sturgeon awards. In addition to writing, Hoffman has taught, worked part-time at a B. Dalton bookstore, and done production work on The Magazine of Fantasy and Science Fiction. An accomplished fiddle player, she has played regularly at various granges near her home in Eugene, Oregon.

Reviews

[Brandon · Rating 2 out of 5]

I finally finished a book that I've had on my tbr for years! That being I Was A Sixth Grade Zombie ,from the Ghosts Of Fear Street series.The story starts off with our two protagonists,Valerie and Mark.They are waiting on their friends to come over to watch one of their favorite TV shows.The show is called Strange Cases.Its basically one of those "real life" paranormal shows.They notice nobody has showed up,so they start making phone calls.All of the phone calls are answered by either parents or siblings stating that all of the kids are in a after school club.Mark and Valerie think this is pretty weird.We learn that these clubs these kids are in have names called either the M-W club or the two ts both are clubs dealing with the days of the week.We also learn why these clubs are even a thing.Its all thanks to their new teacher named Mr.Hool,a big guy that always wears sweaters and huge glasses,that insist all of the kids enter a club.They end up asking one of the parents where this club is at and they learn it's on Oak street.The two kids venture off and run into this weird looking building.They see a guard shack and ask to enter after seeing a bunch of kids go inside ,but are denied,because they don't have a card.They walk.around the building ,but they can't seem to go near the back of the building,because something invisible is blocking them.They run into a police officer who talks really weird and says the building they are trying to go inside is dangerous and full of chemicals.The next day at school Mr.Hool is announcing that there is a contest.The contest will consist of ten winners.The contest is a writing contest about why good manners are important.The winners will get a chance to go to Neverland,a theme park that the kids all.seem to be excited about.Valerie ends up asking one of the other students for their key card because it's the day of the week that person isn't going.They go after school this time sneaking inside and discovering the building is very hot with weird plants and and wires running down the walls.There is also very strange music playing.They notice color coded doors that whoosh open.They end up running into a kid named Trevor who's new.Trevor is kind of geeky and wears high-water pants and shirts that are too small.They ask him questions,but he seems to know just as much as they do.They end up finding this room with these conveyer belts and on the belts are these weird brick spiked things.Well some of them have spikes.Valerie goes to grab one but is stopped by Trevor,who tells her it could be dangerous.She grabs one anyway and it forms a glove like thing on her hands.After this the kids see this room,with a teacher giving commands ,like sit and shake and all this stuff.Im not going to reveal much more about the plot because I've already revealed to much.I didn't like this book that much I thought the beginning of this book was okay,but I got really bored through the middle portion.I also thought the writing was really different.It wasnt super engaging.I found myself going back and rereading pages.I did think the twist and the reason why all of this was going on was pretty creative.I give I was A Sixth Grade Zombie a two out of five stars.

[Greg Kerestan · Rating 1 out of 5]

Well, this one upset my theory that the ghostwritten books were better than the actual Stine contributions... and from a Bram Stoker Award winner? What happened here? Muddled sci-fi, rambling plot and a weird kiddie-show twist. Definitely one of the weaker entries.

[Daniel Taylor · Rating 3 out of 5]

Enjoyable story, but in no way could I suspend disbelief. My partner tells me that his Goosebumps series is much better.

[Alejandro Joseph · Rating 4 out of 5]

*INTENSE WET FART NOISES* THE COVER ART IS A GIANT, MASSIVE, AND OBESE CRAP STAIN ON MY BOOKSHELF THAT INDUCES IDEAS SUCH AS A VISUAL REPRESENTATION OF AN ANAL CAVITY BEING TORN TO SHREDS AND THEN BURNED TO THE POINT OF BEING NOTHING BUT ASH AND SMOKE, THEN OBLITERATED AND SENT INTO SPACE. I think I’ve made my piece about this art… now for the story: quite good, actually. There’s some nice setting design going on and the characters are exceptional. The surprising but very welcome science-fiction story here is super nice and I love all of the interesting ideas that came with it. There’s a solid mystery about what the motive behind everything is and what is truly going on, which keeps the story moving. The climax is nice and the ending is really good, and the book is just generally very interesting and entertaining to read. As for negatives, I’ve got a few. Oh, dear… the burping. To the writer of this fine media, Nina: I hope your Arby’s roast beef got wet whilst writing this, because my moldy banana shrunk to molecular levels. Get your burp fetish junk outta my reading experience, please and thank you. Moving on… there’s some major plot convenience that bugged me, and the story lightly drags here and there. Also, the motive for everything is just stupid. Overall, 9/10. Such a banger with such an astonishingly horrid artwork that will one day be framed next to He-Beast in the Hall of Visual Diarrheas. G’day (and not the singing monster).

[John Loyd · Rating 5 out of 5]

Standalone.

Valerie and Mark wonder why no one came over to watch a TV show with them this week. It's usually a party every Wednesday. They call a few regulars and find that they're all at some after school club that Mr. Hool has been pushing. They go to investigate the club find it needs a card key and other security. Next day at school they borrow a card key, enter with the next day's club. break off from them to explore, finally finding that the kids are being conditioned to be polite. When asked about it the kids don't recall anything except having fun.

Zombie in this instance is unaware, blindly following orders, not brain-eating and highly infectious. Another (I just read "Body Switchers from Outer Space") super fast read. The story arc had a bit more tension. There didn't appear to be any way for Valerie to save her classmates, and trying only put her in danger. The resolution was satisfying. 4.5 stars.

[Dope Ghost Library · Rating 3 out of 5]

An oddball story set in the Fear Street universe for children!

I remember buying this, reading it as a kid, being perplexed by the strange plot, and simply riding it off. It's decent and not too shabby, just weird.

[Thomas · Rating 3 out of 5]

Climate change comes up in some way in this. That's a thing.

FULL REVIEW: https://spongey444.wordpress.com/2020...

[Jamie · Rating 3 out of 5]

Not bad. The Ghosts of Fear Street series is meant to be a Fear Street spin-off for the Goosebumps set, but doesn't manage to feel like either series. This one somehow feels like a middle-school combination of Disturbing Behavior, The Matrix, and, oddly, Snowpiercer.

Read my full recap at: https://ogwnostalgia.wordpress.com/20...