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89 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 1967
Even as a child you sought to be invisible.
When it was time for dinner,
You went and hid under the bed
And let them search for you everywhere.
In school you liked erasers
More than you did pencils.
Empty rooms at dusk meant more to you
Than going to the movies.
Your date waited for you in the park,
While you sat in your kitchen
Cutting your head and neck
Out of old family photographs,
Giving yourself again the appearance
You had on snowy evenings,
Coming home to your parents
With your hair and eyebrows all white.
All they need
Is one little red dress
To start swaying
In that empty closet
For the rest of them
To nudge each other,
Clicking like knitting needles
Or disapproving tongues.
One night you and I were walking.
The moon was so bright
We could see the path under the trees.
Then the clouds came and hid it
So we had to grope our way
Till we felt the sand under our bare feet,
And heard the pounding waves.
Do you remember telling me,
‘Everything outside this moment is a lie’?
We were undressing in the dark
Right at the water’s edge
When I slipped the watch off my wrist
And without being seen or saying
Anything in reply, I threw it into the sea.