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Up a Tree in the Park at Night with a Hedgehog
Benton Kirby is in a spot of bother...
His life hasn't exactly gone to plan. This is hardly surprising, however, as he never really had one in the first place. Armed with a philosophy degree, a dead fiancée, a brother who drives Death around London in his black cab, and a girlfriend with a history of suicidal pets, Benton - ambitionless and emotionally disengaged - embarks, for no apparent reason, on an affair with a beautiful, sexually adventurous, Korean virgin.
Following a strange snowballing of even stranger events, he finds himself, at last, exactly not where he ever imagined he would be, up a tree at night in the park with a hedgehog...
His life hasn't exactly gone to plan. This is hardly surprising, however, as he never really had one in the first place. Armed with a philosophy degree, a dead fiancée, a brother who drives Death around London in his black cab, and a girlfriend with a history of suicidal pets, Benton - ambitionless and emotionally disengaged - embarks, for no apparent reason, on an affair with a beautiful, sexually adventurous, Korean virgin.
Following a strange snowballing of even stranger events, he finds himself, at last, exactly not where he ever imagined he would be, up a tree at night in the park with a hedgehog...
215 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 2009
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136 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 43 reviews
June 22, 2010
This book was a random find on a shelf below a book I was actually looking for in my local book emporium...I have always said that random books are the best kind. This one did not disappoint.
From the opening page I was laughing out loud and boring my housemate to death while reading out passages or lines from the book which had tickled my fancy. It is an easy read- a one sitting which I did on a 50 min flight really early in the morning on the way to work. Needless to say that the flight filled with corporate suits did not appreciate my snorts and giggles at 6:30am. It was the perfect mix of black humour and imagination that kept me going on my Monday morning.
I really enjoyed this book- the characters are weird enough to be normal, the adventure normal enough to be weird and there are little treasures of thoughts and observations from the main character Benton that really made me smile.
I liked this book enough to read it again on the 50 min flight home and laughed even harder the second read through.
From the opening page I was laughing out loud and boring my housemate to death while reading out passages or lines from the book which had tickled my fancy. It is an easy read- a one sitting which I did on a 50 min flight really early in the morning on the way to work. Needless to say that the flight filled with corporate suits did not appreciate my snorts and giggles at 6:30am. It was the perfect mix of black humour and imagination that kept me going on my Monday morning.
I really enjoyed this book- the characters are weird enough to be normal, the adventure normal enough to be weird and there are little treasures of thoughts and observations from the main character Benton that really made me smile.
I liked this book enough to read it again on the 50 min flight home and laughed even harder the second read through.
December 15, 2020
So, the good thing about this book is a lack of discernible plot, which means anything — however, stupid or silly — may happen at any point. Unfortunately, that’s also the bad thing about it! If you have some hours to kill, then you probably wouldn’t mind picking it up. Or, if you borrowed it at the library, you wouldn’t be pissed off that you actually paid money for it.
The way the story opens does grab the reader’s attention. Several pages in, the same reader will likely realize the main character isn’t likeable at all. For me, if I cannot like the protagonist, the only thing that saves a book is a strong, interesting plot. This book didn’t have that, either. In short, as long as you don’t expect much but silliness from this one, you’ll do fine. Reminded me of the later Douglas Adams HHGTTG books.
The way the story opens does grab the reader’s attention. Several pages in, the same reader will likely realize the main character isn’t likeable at all. For me, if I cannot like the protagonist, the only thing that saves a book is a strong, interesting plot. This book didn’t have that, either. In short, as long as you don’t expect much but silliness from this one, you’ll do fine. Reminded me of the later Douglas Adams HHGTTG books.
January 3, 2011
I found this book on the shelf in the library and was intrigued by its title. Unfortunately the title was the best part of it and it rapidly went down hill after the very first page.
There is no real basis for this book other that to hear of the random and haphazard ramblings of a man who acts well below his years.
The story jumps from one ridiculous story to another, all far fetched and just too over the top and stupid.
It follows the life of a unfortunate man whose life and in particular, his love life, never seems to go as planned.
I can see how some people will enjoy the humour on the book but I just found that after the first few pages it got boring and almost as if the humour came before the story.
Luckily the book was only a short one and I got the the end quick enough.
There is no real basis for this book other that to hear of the random and haphazard ramblings of a man who acts well below his years.
The story jumps from one ridiculous story to another, all far fetched and just too over the top and stupid.
It follows the life of a unfortunate man whose life and in particular, his love life, never seems to go as planned.
I can see how some people will enjoy the humour on the book but I just found that after the first few pages it got boring and almost as if the humour came before the story.
Luckily the book was only a short one and I got the the end quick enough.
November 24, 2019
I found this book in a box on a neighbour’s wall, with a sign saying Please Take, so I did. It is one of a selection of books I took from that box, and I started with this one because it was the shortest and looked like it might be funny. It was kind of funny, in poor man’s Nick Hornby sort of way, and it was short, too, but it still took me a long time to read because I was never really that worried about reading it. I think if it had been any longer I wouldn’t have bothered to finish it. I gave two stars because I did actually laugh a couple of times, albeit internally.
December 11, 2018
Drek. Man in his mid thirties, a college teacher, acts like an irresponsible adolescent; lies, cheating, behavior that is so wrong. He defines jerk. Some of the writing is laugh out loud funny but much of it is obscene. I guess the lesson is if you behave like that you might find yourself up a Tree in the park at night with a hedgehog.
September 1, 2010
I didn't enjoy this as much as I thought I would. P. Robert Smith definitely has a talent for finding the absurd in the mundane, I just didn't think the rambling, non-linear narrative (which frequnetly jumps from one point in the characters life to another) was terribly effective. It would make a great short story.
August 17, 2024
This is a weird book. I have no idea who wrote it or how it even got popular enough to get translated into my native language, but it did fall into my hands. More so, it was memorable enough that I remembered about it and managed to hunt it down and buy it second hand.
It's weird in the sense that it's both immensely a product of its time (so so so many sex jokes and weird quips), but also insanely progressive for its time. There's a gay gender non conforming character who's a friend to Benton and is described as fabulous, mentions of lesbians outside of it being a sex thing, a trans woman mention, with a simple but sobering look at inequality. A strong and empathetic stanse on abortion? Nuanse? In my novel with a joke about wax statue Kylie Minogue's nipples? Refreshingly simple main character, who's just some guy and reacts in exageratedly real ways.
Most importantly it's absolutely hilarious. I could read miles upon miles of Benton's inner thoughts and look over stupid or gross things. He's awkward and a weirdo, and kind of pathetic in his quest to uphold the status quo, eat and have his cake at the same time so to say, in the most lovable way.
I don't know if it's the translation, but the transitions of events and jokes land effortlessly. The funeral scene where he is asked to take a photo with his dead girlfriend, cause she looks oh so pretty, and he is literally screaming in his mind, but politely agrees to anyway.The funniest look at relationships and shitty actions and consequences. Funny, simple and just somewhat sad even.
A short easy read, of course, a poetic ending to it, starry sky and a hedgehog.
It's weird in the sense that it's both immensely a product of its time (so so so many sex jokes and weird quips), but also insanely progressive for its time. There's a gay gender non conforming character who's a friend to Benton and is described as fabulous, mentions of lesbians outside of it being a sex thing, a trans woman mention, with a simple but sobering look at inequality. A strong and empathetic stanse on abortion? Nuanse? In my novel with a joke about wax statue Kylie Minogue's nipples? Refreshingly simple main character, who's just some guy and reacts in exageratedly real ways.
Most importantly it's absolutely hilarious. I could read miles upon miles of Benton's inner thoughts and look over stupid or gross things. He's awkward and a weirdo, and kind of pathetic in his quest to uphold the status quo, eat and have his cake at the same time so to say, in the most lovable way.
I don't know if it's the translation, but the transitions of events and jokes land effortlessly. The funeral scene where he is asked to take a photo with his dead girlfriend, cause she looks oh so pretty, and he is literally screaming in his mind, but politely agrees to anyway.The funniest look at relationships and shitty actions and consequences. Funny, simple and just somewhat sad even.
A short easy read, of course, a poetic ending to it, starry sky and a hedgehog.
June 3, 2018
As others have said, unfortunately the best part about this book is the title, as it is just a series of mildly humorous, tenuously linked, early-midlife-crisis male observations on life, by a male you don't really like, with questionable ethics and retarded emotional responses to everything, yet still convinced in his own righteousness of choice, and all written with far too many run-on sentences.
Annoying, isn't it?
I'm convinced that P. Robert Smith was a NaNoWriMo entrant, because the repetition - oh, the repetition! - smacked of someone who is desperately trying to get their word count up before the dreaded clock strikes at midnight on November 30th.
Trust me I've been there, but (luckily) didn't have friends in high places to get my drivel into print before anyone could say 'Actually...hmmm...wait a minute...'
Annoying, isn't it?
I'm convinced that P. Robert Smith was a NaNoWriMo entrant, because the repetition - oh, the repetition! - smacked of someone who is desperately trying to get their word count up before the dreaded clock strikes at midnight on November 30th.
Trust me I've been there, but (luckily) didn't have friends in high places to get my drivel into print before anyone could say 'Actually...hmmm...wait a minute...'
March 25, 2020
Actually I would give this novel half a star if I could. Half a star for being a quick read.
It's a novel that tries to be clever and humorous and fails on both accounts. It's not clever. The humour is puerile at best. The main character, who actually starts off as sympathetic and interesting, develops into a juvenile moron. The toilet humour is overused. The female characters lack any dimension. The only character that might be interesting is the one brother and although he comes up on the back cover as part of the story, he only gets mentioned about five or six times. The plot is dull. I can see what the author was trying to do with the character and plot, but I really think it was a case of trying too hard.
I have a few novels where I have wanted my time returned to me. This one took a little under two hours to read and I would like my time back, please.
It's a novel that tries to be clever and humorous and fails on both accounts. It's not clever. The humour is puerile at best. The main character, who actually starts off as sympathetic and interesting, develops into a juvenile moron. The toilet humour is overused. The female characters lack any dimension. The only character that might be interesting is the one brother and although he comes up on the back cover as part of the story, he only gets mentioned about five or six times. The plot is dull. I can see what the author was trying to do with the character and plot, but I really think it was a case of trying too hard.
I have a few novels where I have wanted my time returned to me. This one took a little under two hours to read and I would like my time back, please.
August 26, 2022
Seeing from the comments, I am no different than the majority of people who have read this book in that I randomly found it somewhere, not really knowing it existed (on my shelf). I was intrigued by the title and picked it up, not having any expectations.
Turns out, this is a really fun book to read. There were a lot of unexpected things happening, despite the fact that there was not much of a plot.
I'm not really a fan of such books, but this one surprised me pleasantly and I think it's worth reading the 200 pages on a sunny afternoon.
Turns out, this is a really fun book to read. There were a lot of unexpected things happening, despite the fact that there was not much of a plot.
I'm not really a fan of such books, but this one surprised me pleasantly and I think it's worth reading the 200 pages on a sunny afternoon.
January 17, 2025
it’s always the books w the hedgehogs that r funky but this was actually cool and I love how the cover has tidbits from the storyline dotted on the title which actually ends up happening and was kinda sad but the last line about stars was nice
also bonus points for both a cabaret and doctor who mention
also bonus points for both a cabaret and doctor who mention
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
May 18, 2017
Such a random read but I liked it. I didn't particularly like the main character I did, however, love that he got kicked in the ass by karma at the end. The story is strange but I couldn't put the book down once I started and read it in an entire sitting.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
October 20, 2017
From the start until the end, I DID NOT EVEN UNDERSTAND ANYTHING FROM THE STORY. One thing though, it's a simple read and so I finished it. Or else, it would have ended in my DNF pile and I rarely leave my books in DNF.
June 29, 2018
Awful - didn’t flow nicely, it read more like bullet points. The ‘plot’ (I say that loosely) jumped all over the place and the characters were horrible. The generous star is for the title, which did grab my attention.
May 20, 2019
LovedlovedlovedlovedLOVED this book!!
It's super quirky and dark, very dark British humor! I found myself laughing out loud, reading passages to people and trying to make my friends read it!
I would recommend it if you have a dark sense of humor, otherwise it would be a bit much
It's super quirky and dark, very dark British humor! I found myself laughing out loud, reading passages to people and trying to make my friends read it!
I would recommend it if you have a dark sense of humor, otherwise it would be a bit much
July 27, 2017
Certainly different and original and even some laugh out loud moments. Well observed and think the author deserves more credit than I'm giving him TBH.
Not much else to add really !
Not much else to add really !
February 2, 2020
2.5 stars. A twisty story with some funny yet cringy moments.
January 16, 2021
Greitai suskaitoma, lengva, šmaikšti knyga.
"Žmogus kokonas. Išorėje tarsi aš, o viduje - vienas iš jų. <...> Nenoriu būti kokonas."
"Žmogus kokonas. Išorėje tarsi aš, o viduje - vienas iš jų. <...> Nenoriu būti kokonas."
June 26, 2021
Labai smagi pradžia ir labai neintriguojanti antra knygos pusė.
February 5, 2024
so boring
put me in a slump
put me in a slump
December 8, 2024
This book made me feel like id forgotten how to read
August 8, 2014
This book is a study in marketing more than anything else. I had a discussion with a friend of mine, and budding author, about the marketing of novels. Generally it’s awful. Most are never marketed to anyone. Only the mega titles, the latest Stephen King, or Alistair MacLean get anything at all, the then it’s only goes as far as a cover shot and a launch date.
In the majority of cases it is left to an Author’s reputation.What do you do if you are a first time author?
Well then you hope to hell you have one of the following:
A Clever title
A Friggin’ awesome cover
A good blurb writer
A recommendation from a famous and well liked writer.
This book has all four. The blurb tells me it’s a funny, it promises stories of a brother who drives death around London in his black cab, and a girlfriend with a history of suicidal pets, affair with a beautiful, sexually adventurous, Korean virgin. that is all the makings of a good novel.
In the tradition of Mark Haddon (The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night Time) and Fiona Apple (Title of the album so friggin’ long I can’t be bothered to type it) P. Robert Smith decides that an incredibly long title would leave the book shop customer saying ‘I wonder how one finds himself up a tree in a park, at night, in a park, with a hedgehog of all things, well that must be one humdinger of a story.
The cover is awesome. It like simcity people, acting out scenes from the book. There is an Indian, a naked violinist, a funeral, a Star Trek wedding, a pinball machine in a fish and chip store and a Bear attack. It’s the work of Adam Simpson.
All of this piqued my interest. What got me to fork over my $10 was the following recommendation ‘It’s totally F**cking Brilliant.’ – Douglas Coupland. Quite a compliment, although the ** annoyed me. ‘F**ing’ is the most important word in the sentence, to ** it, neuters it.
So with high hopes I set down to read this early on a Friday morning on the tram. Page one I was faced with our main character Benton in bed with his Korean girlfriend, he requests that she shoves a finger up his arse.
What happens from there is about 200 odd pages of strangely written, disjointed and generally quite disappointing stories. And I say stories because they are just that. It is about hundred and twenty odd incidents all about a page and half long that have happened to Benton or people Benton knows over the course of his life. Some are amusing, all are strange, many are completely unbelievable, and some seem completely unrelated to anything.
There is no strong narrative, there is no chronological structure. These are glimpses from his, largely unbelievable life. There is also a good reason for this structure which I won’t tell you because it would ruin the story, but it still makes it frustrating to read.
So this is a largely disappointing book. It feels like a catalogue of ideas more than a novel. Some of the ideas I would have liked to have explored more, how you waste such a strong idea as being taxi driver for death is beyond me.
In the majority of cases it is left to an Author’s reputation.What do you do if you are a first time author?
Well then you hope to hell you have one of the following:
A Clever title
A Friggin’ awesome cover
A good blurb writer
A recommendation from a famous and well liked writer.
This book has all four. The blurb tells me it’s a funny, it promises stories of a brother who drives death around London in his black cab, and a girlfriend with a history of suicidal pets, affair with a beautiful, sexually adventurous, Korean virgin. that is all the makings of a good novel.
In the tradition of Mark Haddon (The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night Time) and Fiona Apple (Title of the album so friggin’ long I can’t be bothered to type it) P. Robert Smith decides that an incredibly long title would leave the book shop customer saying ‘I wonder how one finds himself up a tree in a park, at night, in a park, with a hedgehog of all things, well that must be one humdinger of a story.
The cover is awesome. It like simcity people, acting out scenes from the book. There is an Indian, a naked violinist, a funeral, a Star Trek wedding, a pinball machine in a fish and chip store and a Bear attack. It’s the work of Adam Simpson.
All of this piqued my interest. What got me to fork over my $10 was the following recommendation ‘It’s totally F**cking Brilliant.’ – Douglas Coupland. Quite a compliment, although the ** annoyed me. ‘F**ing’ is the most important word in the sentence, to ** it, neuters it.
So with high hopes I set down to read this early on a Friday morning on the tram. Page one I was faced with our main character Benton in bed with his Korean girlfriend, he requests that she shoves a finger up his arse.
What happens from there is about 200 odd pages of strangely written, disjointed and generally quite disappointing stories. And I say stories because they are just that. It is about hundred and twenty odd incidents all about a page and half long that have happened to Benton or people Benton knows over the course of his life. Some are amusing, all are strange, many are completely unbelievable, and some seem completely unrelated to anything.
There is no strong narrative, there is no chronological structure. These are glimpses from his, largely unbelievable life. There is also a good reason for this structure which I won’t tell you because it would ruin the story, but it still makes it frustrating to read.
So this is a largely disappointing book. It feels like a catalogue of ideas more than a novel. Some of the ideas I would have liked to have explored more, how you waste such a strong idea as being taxi driver for death is beyond me.
February 14, 2016
I liked this. A lot. While also understanding why someone would not like this at all.
Our narrator is not likable, you don't root for him (and regularly against him), and he's often not very relatable. His epiphanies are short-lived, his world utterly solipsistic in both thought and action, and he's far too old to be so immature and selfish and directionless. He's a worse version of most of us and an accurate version of some of us. And that is why I liked it. Because some people don't learn. Some people stubbornly are who they are throughout their entire existence, despite being given every opportunity to change and improve and be better.
This was funny, absurd, and the definition of irreverent. It lacked any real purpose, existed solely as a story rather than as a destination, but I enjoy those books. Those meandering, purposeless proses that can make you think or laugh or goggle and this was that.
If you need a protagonist, this is not your story. If you need an action-packed start to stop, this is not your story. This is a book about someone you've met, someone whose story you're no worse off for knowing or not knowing, but which made me laugh out loud at times while feeling so much better about myself because at least I am not that guy.
Our narrator is not likable, you don't root for him (and regularly against him), and he's often not very relatable. His epiphanies are short-lived, his world utterly solipsistic in both thought and action, and he's far too old to be so immature and selfish and directionless. He's a worse version of most of us and an accurate version of some of us. And that is why I liked it. Because some people don't learn. Some people stubbornly are who they are throughout their entire existence, despite being given every opportunity to change and improve and be better.
This was funny, absurd, and the definition of irreverent. It lacked any real purpose, existed solely as a story rather than as a destination, but I enjoy those books. Those meandering, purposeless proses that can make you think or laugh or goggle and this was that.
If you need a protagonist, this is not your story. If you need an action-packed start to stop, this is not your story. This is a book about someone you've met, someone whose story you're no worse off for knowing or not knowing, but which made me laugh out loud at times while feeling so much better about myself because at least I am not that guy.
May 31, 2011
I saw this book at a friend of mine’s place and I was naturally interested in the title right away. It was a birthday gift given to him with a signing inscription in the front which is kind of humorous if you actually read the book because such a concept is referenced to. I was told it was a book about the condition of the modern male and was a quick and easy read. This was in a way both very true and very false. I hated the book until about halfway though because the main character is such a sleazy immoral guy. I did warm up to the writing style and humour though and by the end I actually really enjoyed it. It is a shame because it was the only book I brought with me on a business trip and I finished it on the plane going to my destination. A fast ready could probably finish this in 3 hours but it took me a few days of picking at it and one 2 hour plane ride. If anything; at the end of the book you will feel better about yourself. No matter what your flaws are, at least you’re not the main character in this book. It’s worth it for that alone if anything.
February 25, 2014
Tedious, self-indulgent. This book felt like a short story that had been stretched and stretched until it was full of holes. the author then went and filled in those holes with clever little stories and dialogues that were ever-so aware of how clever they were. unfortunately, the resulting book felt hollow and soulless. I did not like any of the characters, which is fine, but there wasn't any plot pushing me forward. I wanted to stop reading on several occasions, but found myself stuck with no other books, and kept thinking I have to keep my mind open to different reading experiences... I just wish I had that time back now, and a small tree instead of those bound pages.
I really cannot recommend to anyone. it was not just a matter of taste, but just a truly poorly executed book. I feel bad for saying that, but I feel like no one had the balls to say it to this young writer. pity.
I really cannot recommend to anyone. it was not just a matter of taste, but just a truly poorly executed book. I feel bad for saying that, but I feel like no one had the balls to say it to this young writer. pity.
May 8, 2015
For fans of cards against humanity, the first half of this book is hilarious. It reads like a series of anecdotes, all with a morbid humour. I laughed out loud.
Trouble is, after plateauing in the middle, towards the end it stops being amusing. The main character goes from being an arsehole that one wants to read the larky exploits of to just being an arsehole.
Without spoilers, a certain plot direction gave it a grim aftertaste for me. If it had carried on being funny I may have felt differently but I felt a line had been crossed.
It is worth reading for some of the original and rib-tickling moments - an ingenious doctors consultation and a bungled liaison spring to mind - however; I was left with a feeling of disappointment and distaste.
(If that was the idea and there was meant to be a darker meaning burrowed below all the bum jokes, I certainly missed the point.)
Trouble is, after plateauing in the middle, towards the end it stops being amusing. The main character goes from being an arsehole that one wants to read the larky exploits of to just being an arsehole.
Without spoilers, a certain plot direction gave it a grim aftertaste for me. If it had carried on being funny I may have felt differently but I felt a line had been crossed.
It is worth reading for some of the original and rib-tickling moments - an ingenious doctors consultation and a bungled liaison spring to mind - however; I was left with a feeling of disappointment and distaste.
(If that was the idea and there was meant to be a darker meaning burrowed below all the bum jokes, I certainly missed the point.)
September 4, 2012
I stumbled across this book last summer in my local used bookstore and added it to my pile of summer reading. I couldn't put it down - even when my family wanted to be fed (ahem, they know where the kitchen is). I laughed out loud frequently while reading.
I have noticed that some readers have given it a low rating, and perhaps it's not for everyone. The series of events is absurd (the title should be your first hint), quirky and whimsical - which is probably what I enjoy reading the most.
If you can suspend your disbelief and want a good laugh, I would recommend this book.
I have noticed that some readers have given it a low rating, and perhaps it's not for everyone. The series of events is absurd (the title should be your first hint), quirky and whimsical - which is probably what I enjoy reading the most.
If you can suspend your disbelief and want a good laugh, I would recommend this book.
February 24, 2015
It only has a one star rating due to the fact that the cover is blue.
I found the storytelling to be boring, my mind would wander off halfway through a passage and I had to force myself to concentrate. It's just a story about a guy juggling two women at once, the cover drew me in.
With a title like 'Up a Tree in the Park at Night with a Hedgehog' who doesn't want to find out why a characters is in fact up a tree in the park at night with a hedgehog. Sadly the reason isn't as interesting as you might think.
I found the storytelling to be boring, my mind would wander off halfway through a passage and I had to force myself to concentrate. It's just a story about a guy juggling two women at once, the cover drew me in.
With a title like 'Up a Tree in the Park at Night with a Hedgehog' who doesn't want to find out why a characters is in fact up a tree in the park at night with a hedgehog. Sadly the reason isn't as interesting as you might think.
July 28, 2011
Very poor indeed. A thoroughly uninteresting and self-obsessed central character, a few other cardboard cut-outs, some dialogue not one word of which rang true, some weak and forced jokes, blend it all together and this is what you get. The author should be congratulated for somehow getting this published without having to pay for the privilege. Avoid this stupid book!
November 3, 2012
Spoiler alert - the ending spoils the rest of the book!
I don't know what happened to the last chapter, it's like Smith just got bored with the whole thing and thought - sod it I'm done.
Rest of the book was amusing enough, bit Adrian mole aged 35, but made me laugh none the less!
Maybe my copy was missing pages?? I'm gonna look....
I don't know what happened to the last chapter, it's like Smith just got bored with the whole thing and thought - sod it I'm done.
Rest of the book was amusing enough, bit Adrian mole aged 35, but made me laugh none the less!
Maybe my copy was missing pages?? I'm gonna look....
Displaying 1 - 30 of 43 reviews