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Heartbeat
Thomas Hart lives in the numb aftermath of his brother’s tragic death. After spending six months institutionalized for attempted suicide, Thomas returns home to build a new life for himself. He goes to therapy, starts over at a different high school, and makes new friends. All while completely abandoning his old reputation as a state champion swimmer. Or so he thought.
Thomas can’t seem to get resident star athlete Ethan Cooper out of his head. With dimples that have a track record and a kind touch capable of all but unravelling him, Ethan is everything Thomas can’t seem to have, or be. Because there’s no going back to the person he was before the accident that claimed his brother’s life.
So the question hangs. Can Thomas embrace his new existence, make peace with the past, and embrace a future that may include falling in love? Or will his old life continue to barge in, preventing him from moving on?
Thomas can’t seem to get resident star athlete Ethan Cooper out of his head. With dimples that have a track record and a kind touch capable of all but unravelling him, Ethan is everything Thomas can’t seem to have, or be. Because there’s no going back to the person he was before the accident that claimed his brother’s life.
So the question hangs. Can Thomas embrace his new existence, make peace with the past, and embrace a future that may include falling in love? Or will his old life continue to barge in, preventing him from moving on?
403 pages, Kindle Edition
Published November 22, 2022
15 people are currently reading
213 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 20 of 20 reviews
November 18, 2022
(This is kind of long and messy sorry)
This is the kind of book I’ll never tire of rereading. I’ve read it first on wattpad maybe in 2020? And then I reread it again once it became a wattpad paid story and here I am once again. I bought the ebook the day before the preorders and read the book as soon as I got it.
I have a lot of (good) feelings about this book. I loved it, of course. Even though whenever I reread a book, I always have some apprehension about certain parts, I’ve never had that problem with Heartbeat. I’m always excited to reread each scene because I love them all (some more than others ofc). It always feels as if I’m reading it and enjoying it for the first time.
It’s sad, it’s soft, it’s lovely, sometimes I get mad on the behalf of Tommy, and I wish the book would never end. It makes me feel so many things at once.
The author has this certain ability to write characters. I think he writes the best characters I’d ever had the pleasure of reading. I love Tommy and Ethan so so so much. I still randomly think about them just because they made that much of an impression on me.
Ethan is such a good person I’m flabbergasted every single time I reread the book. Makes me wish people like him really existed lol. He’s just this incredibly patient and good person and he’s always so kind and gentle and understanding with Tommy, never making him feel like a burden, never leaving him alone like everyone else, always being here for him.
He’s the kind of guy you just can’t hate. Not that there’s any reason to hate him, of course. I think this is the one book where I’ve never gotten mad at a ML’s actions. He’s just. Inherently good, as if he’s unable to do bad. Of course he’s flawed, he’s human, but his flaws are something that just highlight his qualities (that’s a weird wording I think sorry idk how to explain clearly lol) instead of undermining them. Because everyone is good and bad, but some people’s bad side just overpower their good side, you know? But not him. It just makes me appreciate him more. (I say he’s flawed, but I honestly don’t think he is but I might just be biased)
Tommy was such a good narrator and character too. I don’t usually enjoy first pov’s but Nicholas Brown really made it work. It really felt like his natural thought process and it never once felt awkward or wrong. Tommy’s perspective on things is so lovely—when he looks at happy people and observes how they interact with each other, I just think it’s such a lovely thing to do and it’s just so him. I love him so much. The way he spoke about Liam made me wish I could meet him too and made me grieve a little too as though I really knew him too.
I don’t know what else to say lol I just love this book so much and I’ll never get tired of ranting about it to my friends and whoever’s willing to listen.
The angst was so good, not over the top or underwhelming and the hurt comfort was so lovely. It’s one of the things that make me want to read this book again. I think I can confidently say this is a comfort read to me, although it does make me sad sometimes. But it just makes me feel happier than sad.
I can’t wait for the physical edition to come out so I can buy it too!!! (I’ve spent a very small fortune on this book and it’s totally worth it.)
((Also I really wanted to be the first reviewer for this book so I hope I am))
(Edit: I am so excited for the sequel “first love never die” (i loved the little title drop in heartbeat) on wattpad!!! Also his new book Lovesick which I’ve been waiting for like a kid waits for Santa)
This is the kind of book I’ll never tire of rereading. I’ve read it first on wattpad maybe in 2020? And then I reread it again once it became a wattpad paid story and here I am once again. I bought the ebook the day before the preorders and read the book as soon as I got it.
I have a lot of (good) feelings about this book. I loved it, of course. Even though whenever I reread a book, I always have some apprehension about certain parts, I’ve never had that problem with Heartbeat. I’m always excited to reread each scene because I love them all (some more than others ofc). It always feels as if I’m reading it and enjoying it for the first time.
It’s sad, it’s soft, it’s lovely, sometimes I get mad on the behalf of Tommy, and I wish the book would never end. It makes me feel so many things at once.
The author has this certain ability to write characters. I think he writes the best characters I’d ever had the pleasure of reading. I love Tommy and Ethan so so so much. I still randomly think about them just because they made that much of an impression on me.
Ethan is such a good person I’m flabbergasted every single time I reread the book. Makes me wish people like him really existed lol. He’s just this incredibly patient and good person and he’s always so kind and gentle and understanding with Tommy, never making him feel like a burden, never leaving him alone like everyone else, always being here for him.
He’s the kind of guy you just can’t hate. Not that there’s any reason to hate him, of course. I think this is the one book where I’ve never gotten mad at a ML’s actions. He’s just. Inherently good, as if he’s unable to do bad. Of course he’s flawed, he’s human, but his flaws are something that just highlight his qualities (that’s a weird wording I think sorry idk how to explain clearly lol) instead of undermining them. Because everyone is good and bad, but some people’s bad side just overpower their good side, you know? But not him. It just makes me appreciate him more. (I say he’s flawed, but I honestly don’t think he is but I might just be biased)
Tommy was such a good narrator and character too. I don’t usually enjoy first pov’s but Nicholas Brown really made it work. It really felt like his natural thought process and it never once felt awkward or wrong. Tommy’s perspective on things is so lovely—when he looks at happy people and observes how they interact with each other, I just think it’s such a lovely thing to do and it’s just so him. I love him so much. The way he spoke about Liam made me wish I could meet him too and made me grieve a little too as though I really knew him too.
I don’t know what else to say lol I just love this book so much and I’ll never get tired of ranting about it to my friends and whoever’s willing to listen.
The angst was so good, not over the top or underwhelming and the hurt comfort was so lovely. It’s one of the things that make me want to read this book again. I think I can confidently say this is a comfort read to me, although it does make me sad sometimes. But it just makes me feel happier than sad.
I can’t wait for the physical edition to come out so I can buy it too!!! (I’ve spent a very small fortune on this book and it’s totally worth it.)
((Also I really wanted to be the first reviewer for this book so I hope I am))
(Edit: I am so excited for the sequel “first love never die” (i loved the little title drop in heartbeat) on wattpad!!! Also his new book Lovesick which I’ve been waiting for like a kid waits for Santa)
November 22, 2022
Nicholas Brown is another new-to-me author and I'm a big fan. They certainly have a way with words and knows how to write characters that are not only relatable, but also who are realistic. I think everyone has at some point of their life- experienced what Tommy has been through. Maybe not the part of losing your sibling in such a terrible way, but being able to relate to the grief and the anger that Tommy experiences. He was the one who shouldered everyone else's responsibilities while his family fell apart, and no one was there to be there for him. No one believed him when he said he didn't mean to take so many pills, he was just soo tired.
Ethan! Oh Ethan, be still my heart. He's so sweet, and nice and oh so supportive. Not to mention understanding- he never once judged Thomas, he was always supportive of him. Always. When Tommy let himself open up to Ethan was so beautiful, I am so glad I was able to read this beautiful story. I enjoyed how Tommy slowly realized his own worth and the growth he had over the course of those rough years, how he wasn't the same person he was then- and how that was okay.
When these two split up it hurt so bad, I was just hoping they would get back together and they did!
This story was raw, and touching and so emotional. I grew emotionally attached to all of these characters, my emotions were all over the place while reading this. I will not be forgetting this book anytime soon and it will definitely be added to my reread list. Great pacing, phenomenal characters, fantastic background, and just the right amount of tear-jerking chapters.
"the thing was, it didn't matter if we got a year, five, or twenty- it would never be enough, and it would always seem like minutes. So I would try to take in every single one of our minutes. And hope they'd multiply."
I highly recommend this! *I received an early copy of this book and this is my honest review.*
Ethan! Oh Ethan, be still my heart. He's so sweet, and nice and oh so supportive. Not to mention understanding- he never once judged Thomas, he was always supportive of him. Always. When Tommy let himself open up to Ethan was so beautiful, I am so glad I was able to read this beautiful story. I enjoyed how Tommy slowly realized his own worth and the growth he had over the course of those rough years, how he wasn't the same person he was then- and how that was okay.
When these two split up it hurt so bad, I was just hoping they would get back together and they did!
This story was raw, and touching and so emotional. I grew emotionally attached to all of these characters, my emotions were all over the place while reading this. I will not be forgetting this book anytime soon and it will definitely be added to my reread list. Great pacing, phenomenal characters, fantastic background, and just the right amount of tear-jerking chapters.
"the thing was, it didn't matter if we got a year, five, or twenty- it would never be enough, and it would always seem like minutes. So I would try to take in every single one of our minutes. And hope they'd multiply."
I highly recommend this! *I received an early copy of this book and this is my honest review.*
November 23, 2022
I remember reading this book back in 2020 and being so touched by Thomas and his experiences. Not only did I relate to him myself but his character also reminded me of someone dear to me who had experienced a similar conflict.
This book made me feel understood, seen, and reminded me that my experiences are not something I have to deal with alone. That other people feel this way as well.
Ever since then, I’ve been following Nicholas on Twitter and Instagram and looking forward to updates about his latest works. It took him a while to get to officially publish Heartbeat, and I’m beyond proud of him for coming this far.
This book is truly worth a read, especially if you’re looking for something to toggle between all your emotions.
This book made me feel understood, seen, and reminded me that my experiences are not something I have to deal with alone. That other people feel this way as well.
Ever since then, I’ve been following Nicholas on Twitter and Instagram and looking forward to updates about his latest works. It took him a while to get to officially publish Heartbeat, and I’m beyond proud of him for coming this far.
This book is truly worth a read, especially if you’re looking for something to toggle between all your emotions.
January 27, 2024
I remember reading this on Wattpad and as soon as I realized it was going to be published I knew I had to get my hands on it.
It is still as great as the first time I read it.
Now, the reason why I didn't give this book 5 stars. There are quite a few typos and grammatical errors that my mind ended up hyperfocusing on as I read which made it seem quite amateur-esque and distracting. I felt that it took away from the quality and overall value of the writing, the story, and the book as a whole, which is quite unfortunate as the book is amazing and original, if I might add.
Overall, find yourself a quality editor and you're all set. Also, despite this book being who knows how many years old, a sequel would be nice. Plus, I'd say Thomas and Ethan deserve one. Or a prequel that focuses on Liam and Thomas's relationship; either or. Or both.
It is still as great as the first time I read it.
Now, the reason why I didn't give this book 5 stars. There are quite a few typos and grammatical errors that my mind ended up hyperfocusing on as I read which made it seem quite amateur-esque and distracting. I felt that it took away from the quality and overall value of the writing, the story, and the book as a whole, which is quite unfortunate as the book is amazing and original, if I might add.
Overall, find yourself a quality editor and you're all set. Also, despite this book being who knows how many years old, a sequel would be nice. Plus, I'd say Thomas and Ethan deserve one. Or a prequel that focuses on Liam and Thomas's relationship; either or. Or both.
November 28, 2022
Wow, all the feels. I can connect with this book so much and what the people are feeling. Grief is such a strong emotion that everyone deals with differently, but in the end we never truly get over our loss, but we cope and learn to live with that missing chunk so we can smile again.
I loved this part in the book. Their chunk, it’s so perfect.
“It’s like a chunk goes missing, isn’t it?” She tilted her head, letting her ponytail dangle in the air as she tried to catch my gaze. I nodded, still staring at Rose. She looked kind, just like her sister. “It doesn’t go away,” she told me. “It only…takes time. To understand.” I turned to her curiously. “For us to realize that it’s a good thing, not having it go away?” She teared up but didn’t try to hide it. “It’s their chunk. It wouldn’t be right to have it filled again, would it?” she whispered as if letting me in on a secret.
I loved this part in the book. Their chunk, it’s so perfect.
“It’s like a chunk goes missing, isn’t it?” She tilted her head, letting her ponytail dangle in the air as she tried to catch my gaze. I nodded, still staring at Rose. She looked kind, just like her sister. “It doesn’t go away,” she told me. “It only…takes time. To understand.” I turned to her curiously. “For us to realize that it’s a good thing, not having it go away?” She teared up but didn’t try to hide it. “It’s their chunk. It wouldn’t be right to have it filled again, would it?” she whispered as if letting me in on a secret.
April 24, 2023
Beautiful Story
This was a page turner for me. I couldn’t put it down. Pretty much finished in one setting. This was a beautiful well written story of Thomas, loss, recovery, and love. The connection between he and Ethan is told perfectly. The author Nicholas Brown captures the loss of Liam, Thomas’ older brother, and Thomas’ recovery in a way that connected me to the character. I have experienced loss that was sudden and traumatic, the guilt, and regret. I connected with this story and Thomas.
5 Stars! I highly recommend this book to readers. I look forward to reading more from author Nicholas Brown.
This was a page turner for me. I couldn’t put it down. Pretty much finished in one setting. This was a beautiful well written story of Thomas, loss, recovery, and love. The connection between he and Ethan is told perfectly. The author Nicholas Brown captures the loss of Liam, Thomas’ older brother, and Thomas’ recovery in a way that connected me to the character. I have experienced loss that was sudden and traumatic, the guilt, and regret. I connected with this story and Thomas.
5 Stars! I highly recommend this book to readers. I look forward to reading more from author Nicholas Brown.
November 25, 2022
I loved it
January 15, 2023
And to think this was once just a Wattpad story
September 13, 2023
why is a therapist smoking cigarettes with a high schooler during a therapy session
November 14, 2023
3.75/5
Heartbeat is told through the eyes of Thomas - a 17 year old boy who is battling his inner demons and living with depression, whilst trying to settle in at a new school. Then along comes Ethan, and, well...
I loved both of the main characters in this book. Whilst I haven't experienced a tragedy like Thomas, I did relate to his mental health difficulties a lot, and especially the deep rooted feeling of inadequacy that comes with it. I sympathised with him throughout the book, and could really feel his inner turmoil through Nicholas' writing.
Ethan, on the other hand, is just an absolute cinnamon roll. He has his own demons, but he is the sweetest and most understanding partner that Thomas could have asked for, and their romantic chemistry together was beautiful. I didn't realise this was a YA novel when I bought it (usually I go for smuttier books with older MCs), but I was enamoured with them nonetheless, and I enjoyed watching their story unfold. They have plenty of banter alongside the romance and heavier stuff too, which I loved.
Where this book didn't quite meet the mark for me was the amount of fade-to-black scenes it included (and not just the spicy ones, which bugged me too). I sometimes felt as though scenes just abruptly ended, or there was a small time jump that felt too sudden. At times it made the story, and particularly the protagonists relationship, feel a bit rushed or fragmented. There were also too many side characters, and I couldn't keep track of them. And finally, I felt like I was given barely any character descriptions, so I couldn't clearly picture anyone (including the MCs).
Overall, I did enjoy the story, and the writing was touching. I loved the main characters and definitely rooted for them, but I felt like I wanted just a little bit more in some places, and maybe more of a HEA, rather than a HFN.
Heartbeat is told through the eyes of Thomas - a 17 year old boy who is battling his inner demons and living with depression, whilst trying to settle in at a new school. Then along comes Ethan, and, well...
I loved both of the main characters in this book. Whilst I haven't experienced a tragedy like Thomas, I did relate to his mental health difficulties a lot, and especially the deep rooted feeling of inadequacy that comes with it. I sympathised with him throughout the book, and could really feel his inner turmoil through Nicholas' writing.
Ethan, on the other hand, is just an absolute cinnamon roll. He has his own demons, but he is the sweetest and most understanding partner that Thomas could have asked for, and their romantic chemistry together was beautiful. I didn't realise this was a YA novel when I bought it (usually I go for smuttier books with older MCs), but I was enamoured with them nonetheless, and I enjoyed watching their story unfold. They have plenty of banter alongside the romance and heavier stuff too, which I loved.
Where this book didn't quite meet the mark for me was the amount of fade-to-black scenes it included (and not just the spicy ones, which bugged me too). I sometimes felt as though scenes just abruptly ended, or there was a small time jump that felt too sudden. At times it made the story, and particularly the protagonists relationship, feel a bit rushed or fragmented. There were also too many side characters, and I couldn't keep track of them. And finally, I felt like I was given barely any character descriptions, so I couldn't clearly picture anyone (including the MCs).
Overall, I did enjoy the story, and the writing was touching. I loved the main characters and definitely rooted for them, but I felt like I wanted just a little bit more in some places, and maybe more of a HEA, rather than a HFN.
January 5, 2025
It was a well written book - not the usual cheap teenage angst / hookup books you can easily find with their cartoon covers. It's not a particularly uplifting read, though. Everyone is broken in their own ways - expect perhaps Noah. And with the broken MC, he discovers through the book how to move forward being broken and taped together versus ending it all. I'm a little older and didn't grow up with money in NYC but the book has a disturbing amount of drug abuse - everyone broken uses drugs. SPOILERS and for someone who had guilt about not being able to save his brother while high - he didn't have any problems with continuing to get high.
Four stars is fair for a well-written book but I can't say I enjoyed it. I did finish and respect it.
Four stars is fair for a well-written book but I can't say I enjoyed it. I did finish and respect it.
July 31, 2025
Late review.
Had read this first on Wattpad and grieved that this wasn't an officially published novel.
It got published later on and grieved again that I couldn't get a physical copy of this in the country that I lived in. So purchased an ebook to support the author and read it again for the second time.
Fast forward to a few months ago in 2024, I came across this again and re-read it for the third time.
Nothing's changed. I still feel all the same things when I read this for the first time.
It's still one of my absolute favourites.
Aster
Had read this first on Wattpad and grieved that this wasn't an officially published novel.
It got published later on and grieved again that I couldn't get a physical copy of this in the country that I lived in. So purchased an ebook to support the author and read it again for the second time.
Fast forward to a few months ago in 2024, I came across this again and re-read it for the third time.
Nothing's changed. I still feel all the same things when I read this for the first time.
It's still one of my absolute favourites.
Aster
December 13, 2022
This ended up being another one of my top 10 books this year.
This might be a hard book for some to read, but Brown's characters paint a realistic picture of the downward spiral of mental health, depression, and survivor's guilt.
Cleverly written, engaging, and had me tearing up in several spots.
Well worth the read. Brilliant.
This might be a hard book for some to read, but Brown's characters paint a realistic picture of the downward spiral of mental health, depression, and survivor's guilt.
Cleverly written, engaging, and had me tearing up in several spots.
Well worth the read. Brilliant.
April 16, 2023
Beautifully written .
A beautifully written book about a tragedy that no family should ever have endure.
The author draws you into this familys grief and Tommys story is of a strong but very broken boy who comes back to light with his relationship with Lucas who takes time to notice Tommy and helps heal him.
Just Beautiful.
A beautifully written book about a tragedy that no family should ever have endure.
The author draws you into this familys grief and Tommys story is of a strong but very broken boy who comes back to light with his relationship with Lucas who takes time to notice Tommy and helps heal him.
Just Beautiful.
September 22, 2023
Am I becoming mlm fan 💀💀💀
Anyway this was so good back in 2020 that I bought wattpad coins and went through the long and impossible task of trying to find lost stories on wattpad for it and now it's published so congrats to Nicholas Brown. 5 stars for nostalgia.
Anyway this was so good back in 2020 that I bought wattpad coins and went through the long and impossible task of trying to find lost stories on wattpad for it and now it's published so congrats to Nicholas Brown. 5 stars for nostalgia.
April 17, 2023
I love this book so much.
July 16, 2024
The ending is to die for 😔!!
I really love the book sm
I really love the book sm
September 24, 2025
I loved it, really breaks your heart when reading but also a very captivating story
January 2, 2024
The healing power of kindness. That is what this book is about for me. It showed me how one person can change your life by just existing in it. By showing you a different perspective on your existing relationships, by reinterpreting your view of past events.
Lovely humor intertwined with sass and beautifully developing relationship. The story gives just enough information at a time to process what happened and how it affected Thomas. Each chapter unravels a new level of events that led Thomas to his current mental state and at the same time offers a glimpse of hope with Ethans presence.
Love, love, love this book.
Lovely humor intertwined with sass and beautifully developing relationship. The story gives just enough information at a time to process what happened and how it affected Thomas. Each chapter unravels a new level of events that led Thomas to his current mental state and at the same time offers a glimpse of hope with Ethans presence.
Love, love, love this book.
October 11, 2024
Late review.
Had read this first on Wattpad and grieved that this wasn't an officially published novel.
It got published later on and grieved again that I couldn't get a physical copy of this in the country that I lived in. So purchased an ebook to support the author and read it again for the second time.
Fast forward to a few months ago in 2024, I came across this again and re-read it for the third time.
Nothing's changed. I still feel all the same things when I read this for the first time.
It's still one of my absolute favourites.
Aster
Had read this first on Wattpad and grieved that this wasn't an officially published novel.
It got published later on and grieved again that I couldn't get a physical copy of this in the country that I lived in. So purchased an ebook to support the author and read it again for the second time.
Fast forward to a few months ago in 2024, I came across this again and re-read it for the third time.
Nothing's changed. I still feel all the same things when I read this for the first time.
It's still one of my absolute favourites.
Aster
Displaying 1 - 20 of 20 reviews