What do you think?
Rate this book
Suicide Squeeze: A Novel
The Edgar Award-nominated author of Gun Monkeys delivers an adrenaline rush of a novel that features a special appearance by Joe DiMaggio.
The high spot of Teddy Folger's life was the day in 1954 that he got an autographed baseball card from Joe DiMaggio himself. It's been downhill ever since. Which is why he just unloaded his freeloading wife and torched his own comic-book store – in one of the stupidest insurance scams in history. Enter Conner Samson.
The down-on-his-luck repo man has just been hired to repossess Teddy's boat. Little does he know there's a baseball card on board that some men are willing to kill for. Thus begins a rip-roaring cross-country odyssey–and with bodies piling up, the squeeze is on for the penultimate piece of Americana.
And Conner will be lucky if he ends up back where he started: broke and (still) breathing.
The high spot of Teddy Folger's life was the day in 1954 that he got an autographed baseball card from Joe DiMaggio himself. It's been downhill ever since. Which is why he just unloaded his freeloading wife and torched his own comic-book store – in one of the stupidest insurance scams in history. Enter Conner Samson.
The down-on-his-luck repo man has just been hired to repossess Teddy's boat. Little does he know there's a baseball card on board that some men are willing to kill for. Thus begins a rip-roaring cross-country odyssey–and with bodies piling up, the squeeze is on for the penultimate piece of Americana.
And Conner will be lucky if he ends up back where he started: broke and (still) breathing.
368 pages, Kindle Edition
First published March 29, 2004
5 people are currently reading
182 people want to read
About the author
Victor Gischler
371 books414 followersVictor Gischler is an American author of humorous crime fiction.
Gischler's debut novel Gun Monkeys was nominated for the Edgar Award, and his novel Shotgun Opera was an Anthony Award finalist. His work has been translated into Italian, French, Spanish and Japanese. He earned a Ph.D. in English at the University of Southern Mississippi. His fifth novel Go-Go Girls of the Apocalypse was published in 2008 by the Touchstone/Fireside imprint of Simon & Schuster.
He has also writes American comic books like The Punisher: Frank Castle, Wolverine and Deadpool for Marvel Comics. Gischler worked on X-Men "Curse of the Mutants" starting in the Death of Dracula one-shot and continued in X-Men #1.
Gun Monkeys has been optioned for a film adaptation, with Lee Goldberg writing the script and Ryuhei Kitamura penciled in to direct.
Gischler's debut novel Gun Monkeys was nominated for the Edgar Award, and his novel Shotgun Opera was an Anthony Award finalist. His work has been translated into Italian, French, Spanish and Japanese. He earned a Ph.D. in English at the University of Southern Mississippi. His fifth novel Go-Go Girls of the Apocalypse was published in 2008 by the Touchstone/Fireside imprint of Simon & Schuster.
He has also writes American comic books like The Punisher: Frank Castle, Wolverine and Deadpool for Marvel Comics. Gischler worked on X-Men "Curse of the Mutants" starting in the Death of Dracula one-shot and continued in X-Men #1.
Gun Monkeys has been optioned for a film adaptation, with Lee Goldberg writing the script and Ryuhei Kitamura penciled in to direct.
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 23 of 23 reviews
February 8, 2012
In 1954, Teddy Folger had a Joe DiMaggio baseball card autographed by Joe DiMaggio, Marilyn Monroe, and Billy Wilder. It was supposedly destroyed in a fire but it seems that it survived. Loser Conner Samson is hired to repossess Folger's boat and gets caught in a web of deceit and murder. Will Conner survive long enough to collect his fee?
First off, this wasn't the type of book I was expecting. My first exposure to Victor Gishler, or The Gisch as I am now referring to him, was The Deputy. This book has little in common with The Deputy. It feels more like a comedic Donald Westlake caper or something by Carl Hiassen.
The story is pretty good. A Japanese businessman gets wind that Folger's card may not have perished in flames and sends his people to America to find it. Complicating matters are Conner Samson trying to repo Teddy's boat, Teddy's ex-wife, former NSA agent, and gamblers Teddy owes money to. Throw in Conner's nympho pseudo-girlfriend named Tyranny and there you go.
Twists and turns abound. Every time I thought I knew who would end up with the card, they'd wind up dead. For a story with a lot of laughs, there was also a lot of bloodshed, especially in the last fifty or sixty pages.
There's not a lot else to say. It's a funny story with plenty of action but not what I was expecting from The Gisch. If you've never read Victor Gischler before, I'd go with The Deputy before this one. Still, Suicide Squeeze will probably go over well with fans of Westlake or Hiassen.
First off, this wasn't the type of book I was expecting. My first exposure to Victor Gishler, or The Gisch as I am now referring to him, was The Deputy. This book has little in common with The Deputy. It feels more like a comedic Donald Westlake caper or something by Carl Hiassen.
The story is pretty good. A Japanese businessman gets wind that Folger's card may not have perished in flames and sends his people to America to find it. Complicating matters are Conner Samson trying to repo Teddy's boat, Teddy's ex-wife, former NSA agent, and gamblers Teddy owes money to. Throw in Conner's nympho pseudo-girlfriend named Tyranny and there you go.
Twists and turns abound. Every time I thought I knew who would end up with the card, they'd wind up dead. For a story with a lot of laughs, there was also a lot of bloodshed, especially in the last fifty or sixty pages.
There's not a lot else to say. It's a funny story with plenty of action but not what I was expecting from The Gisch. If you've never read Victor Gischler before, I'd go with The Deputy before this one. Still, Suicide Squeeze will probably go over well with fans of Westlake or Hiassen.
April 7, 2021
Victor Gischler is a master of combing humor and swift, blinding and exceedingly fun violence into a great read.
December 27, 2021
This would have been a 4 stars fast action romp if I didn't dislike the main character so much. Samson is an always losing gambler in debt to a local crime boss (Rocky Big), trying to find $ to repay, accepts job to repossess a yacht. Turns out the guy who had the yacht also had an autographed DiMaggio baseball card which a Yakuza crime boss wants. So Samson tries to find the card while trying to stay out of the way of increasingly violent Yakuzas also on the hunt. Samson withheld a lot of information which might have helped avoid some of the murders that ensued, but he was self-centered and cowardly. Sadly, the only characters I found likeable were the local crime boss (Rocky Big), his enforcer (Otis) and the Yakuka boss' right hand man (Moto).
December 6, 2019
Good writer, some interesting phrases, but just too noir for me. Otherwise good.
October 25, 2020
The story was well-paced and kept my interest pretty well though out. The plot was interesting but some of the characters were annoying to deal with.
August 26, 2008
All the Bullets and Twice the Caffeine
It's tough not to like a novel with Joe DiMaggio and Marilyn Monroe at the center of the plot. Even tougher when you've got characters like Fat Otis running around "turning strong, healthy men into little, mashed-up heaps of bone and flesh." And then there's bookie Rockie Big, an adulterous nympho girlfriend named Tyranny, a fat Japanese billionaire Yakuza boss, and a busted ex-NSA agent, all playing backup to our hero, the broken-down would-be ballplayer, hard luck gambler, sometimes repo-man and all times lovable Conner Samson.
If like me you'd never heard of Victor Gischler, fasten your seatbelt and lock in for the whacked-out spawn of the mating of Carl Hiaasen and Elmore Leonard, an in-your-face trip through Florida's panhandle while Samson tracks down a deadbeat's boat and a legendary baseball card. Gischler's prose literally rips across the pages, too fast for poetry, too lean for embellishment, bouncing from one-liner to six-shooter as thick with black humor as it is with fresh corpses. And give Gischler extra credit: nowhere in his cast of misfits and miscreants is there a single Russian mobster, the seemingly obligatory feature of every thriller written in the past couple of years.
If you're looking for an irreverent read straight from the hip, fast and furious with not an ounce of social redeeming value to distract you, Victor Gischler and "Suicide Squeeze" marks the end of your quest. "Just do it.
It's tough not to like a novel with Joe DiMaggio and Marilyn Monroe at the center of the plot. Even tougher when you've got characters like Fat Otis running around "turning strong, healthy men into little, mashed-up heaps of bone and flesh." And then there's bookie Rockie Big, an adulterous nympho girlfriend named Tyranny, a fat Japanese billionaire Yakuza boss, and a busted ex-NSA agent, all playing backup to our hero, the broken-down would-be ballplayer, hard luck gambler, sometimes repo-man and all times lovable Conner Samson.
If like me you'd never heard of Victor Gischler, fasten your seatbelt and lock in for the whacked-out spawn of the mating of Carl Hiaasen and Elmore Leonard, an in-your-face trip through Florida's panhandle while Samson tracks down a deadbeat's boat and a legendary baseball card. Gischler's prose literally rips across the pages, too fast for poetry, too lean for embellishment, bouncing from one-liner to six-shooter as thick with black humor as it is with fresh corpses. And give Gischler extra credit: nowhere in his cast of misfits and miscreants is there a single Russian mobster, the seemingly obligatory feature of every thriller written in the past couple of years.
If you're looking for an irreverent read straight from the hip, fast and furious with not an ounce of social redeeming value to distract you, Victor Gischler and "Suicide Squeeze" marks the end of your quest. "Just do it.
July 22, 2012
When looking at the other reviewers of this book, most of them are male. And I would say this book would appeal more to men. Not because of the sports, because there is really very little about sports in the book, But the style of writing and treatment of certain situations seemed to be more oriented to a male's perspective.
I wouldn't call this book a mystery, even though there is a murder involved. It is more of an action book (or flick, as I could see the big screen representation in my head very clearly). I did not read it wanted to know what happen, or trying to answer some question. Much of it is rather predictable. But there were shoot 'em up scenes to keep any one happy that likes that kind of detail.
Don't read it if you think it is a baseball book, it really isn't. I thought it might have more baseball in it and why I chose to read it.
I wouldn't call this book a mystery, even though there is a murder involved. It is more of an action book (or flick, as I could see the big screen representation in my head very clearly). I did not read it wanted to know what happen, or trying to answer some question. Much of it is rather predictable. But there were shoot 'em up scenes to keep any one happy that likes that kind of detail.
Don't read it if you think it is a baseball book, it really isn't. I thought it might have more baseball in it and why I chose to read it.
February 23, 2008
Victor centers this book around a unique and very desireable baseball card and the owner's attempts to seel it for a lot of money. That may sound quite quaint, but that's just because I haven't mentioned that one potential buyer heads a Japanese mob or the mentally imbalanced former NSA agent in addition to the usual incompetent hitmen. This book has my two favorite Gischler characters--Otis and the protagonist, Connor Samson.
January 24, 2017
"Dr. Goldblatt sighed, squinted at his watch. 'We only have a minute left.'
'Oh, darn. I was having such a good time.'
Goldblatt said, 'The next time you masturbate, i want you to use a cucumber. Then chop the cucumber into a salad and eat it. It's very important.'
'What?'
'I'm afraid our time is up.'
Freak."
I love the way Victor Gischler combines humour & mayhem, in equal measure. Thoroughly entertaining.
4 stars from this reader.
'Oh, darn. I was having such a good time.'
Goldblatt said, 'The next time you masturbate, i want you to use a cucumber. Then chop the cucumber into a salad and eat it. It's very important.'
'What?'
'I'm afraid our time is up.'
Freak."
I love the way Victor Gischler combines humour & mayhem, in equal measure. Thoroughly entertaining.
4 stars from this reader.
January 31, 2014
I like that this book starts out with some Hollywood lore and then bases the plot around that. It is an easy read. This is an enjoyable crime novel with some meandering around the main plot to round it out. The characters were fun but not stand-out memorable. The story wasn't a white knuckle adventure, just a nice way to spend some free time.
November 26, 2014
Teddy Folger got a signed baseball card from Joe DiMaggio when he was a kid. After divorcing his wife and burning down his comic book store he moves to Florida. A boat repo man is attempting to repossess Folger's boat which has the priceless card on board. There are willing to kill to get the card.
February 9, 2013
This was a recommendation from a member of one of the groups here on Goodreads. This was also my first ebook from the library. It was interesting and kept my interest without being really heavy. There was a lot of fighting and shoot em up stuff but nothing that I couldn't handle.
December 16, 2015
a very nice caper story
but not by plan -- the caper evolves through happenstance and bad luck ...... great! This my fourth Gischler book and I really enjoy his humor and imagination. Thanks!
but not by plan -- the caper evolves through happenstance and bad luck ...... great! This my fourth Gischler book and I really enjoy his humor and imagination. Thanks!
November 14, 2007
read 03.04.07
February 11, 2010
Great fun.
February 24, 2010
fantastic...loved it.
July 7, 2010
Decent enough thriller with a good dollop of black humor and lots of mayhem.
September 18, 2011
Baseball, loansharks, the Yakuza... the man makes it work. :P
May 18, 2013
An idiotic insurance scam, and a baseball card people are willing to kill for.
An entertaining read.
An entertaining read.
April 2, 2025
Another delightful violent romp.
February 14, 2011
Highly entertaining.
March 20, 2011
"Jenny sent out a vibe of broken-winged desperation that stirred the predator in men."
April 9, 2017
Once again Gischler writes a story that moves at an amazing pace. I've often thought of his books as almost a collection of shorts, with each chapter so fast and full of action that it could almost be a story unto itself. He has a knack for fun dialogue and ridiculous situations, all springing from a very healthy imagination. Is it high art or "great" literature? Of course not. Is it a freakin' fun read that delivers exactly as promised? Hell yes it is.
Displaying 1 - 23 of 23 reviews