Say More About That…And Other Ways to Speak Up, Push Back, and Advocate for Yourself and Others

by Amber Cabral

Concrete strategies to call out wrongdoing at home, at work, at school, and elsewhere

In Say More About That, veteran inclusion strategist, coach, writer, and speaker Amber Cabral delivers an incisive and practical guide to assertively addressing inequitable treatment you see at home, work, school, and other settings. The book offers a complete communications toolkit for equity advocacy you can deploy on your own behalf and on behalf of others.

You’ll get the tactics, context, and tools that make being brave and speaking up a lot easier. You’ll also find:

A thorough discussion of the fundamentals of inclusion and equity, including concepts of advocacy and allyship, privilege, and identity
An examination of the social landscape that makes speaking up so daunting
Explorations of the most effective language and tactics you can use when you make a stand for yourself or others

The perfect resource for underrepresented professionals, allies, advocates, and people seeking to make a positive difference in the world, Say More About That is the assertiveness manual you need if you’ve been meaning to speak up but are worried about being drowned out.

Genres: Nonfiction, Self Help

240 pages, Hardcover

Published July 20, 2022

Reviews

[Lily-Mae B · Rating 3 out of 5]

The Art Of Say More by Amber Cabral was a phenomenal read, touching on many real life situations and perspectives in which discrimination is still present today. Cabral inspires others to be inquisitive, ask the right questions, listen to others, aspire to advocate by changing small things about your daily living; having an open mind, avoiding negatively stereotyping, and using harmful expressions.

I find the general gist of this book was nice, however I think we’re taking DEI too far when we say that the expression “To fall on deaf ears” is offensive. I know that this was written in 2021 after the pandemic which influenced the author’s sensitivities on social justice issues, but as someone who is hard of hearing, to say that the expression is offensive is a little bit of an overstatement/overreaction.

Other than that, I love the realistic tools and narratives that Cabral provides us to become better allies and advocates.

Being a better ally and becoming a leader means speaking out when you see something and listening when someone needs your ear. Of course, boundaries are important to maintain.

The book had a lot of verbal diarrhea, but the overall narrative was one of justice, understanding, and spreading awareness… Standing up for yourself, other minority groups, and for your peers is important. That is the baseline.

Unfortunately this book is only getting three stars from me… the formatting was okay but I think the comment about “falling on deaf ears” being offensive, really took me out. What a crazy thing to get upset about.
I understand how it can be interpreted as offensive but as a saying, it is not detrimental that we erase it from our vocabulary. Sometimes we fight too hard for things that simply don’t matter, that’s all. Her heart was in the right place… but yeesh.

Overall, Cabral promotes respect and tolerance, which I think everyone can get behind. It’s a good read, and will definitely inspire me to push for my beliefs, be more inclusive, and advocate for equity. I just wish we weren’t fighting ‘useless’ battles… Once again bringing up the deaf comment lol. Everything else lined up perfectly… just that one comment ruined the whole vibe for me…

Despite my biases, I recognize the importance of this work and what it stands for.

[Tamara · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is phenomenal. I lead a book club around DEI-related topics, and we chose this book for our group. I loved how Amber provides applicable steps for approaching conversations. As someone who typically overthinks everything, her book simplified some of the difficult conversations that often keep me from speaking up. I also appreciated that she shares several of her own experiences when it comes to speaking up – it definitely made me feel seen and like I wasn’t alone in my journey! Highly recommend this read for anyone and everyone who wants to use their voice to speak up, whether for themselves or others.

[Erinp · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really thought this book was helpful in both being an ally for others and myself. I would love to talk to Ms Cabral she just seems so smart and calm and like every conversation she has is probably very constructive. Worth reading if you ever interact with anybody ever.

[Emily Stine · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a good book for people who are aware there are societal issues and want to do something. It provides a good overview of basic concepts before providing tangible strategies. It is well-written and easy to read, making it all the more accessible.

[Amy Eckhardt · Rating 2 out of 5]

I really wanted to like this book! I’m invested in the DEI program at my job and have always gotten a lot out of each of the books and classes. I relied heavily on the Crucial Conversations programs in my professional career. A lot of examples she provides for how to handle scenarios go against the grain of how I learned to handle conflict. She also contradicts herself in some of her examples. For instance, earlier in the book she discusses the importance of speaking up against using phrases, such as “falling on deaf ears“ and how it’s offensive to the disabled community. But then later she shared how someone called her out on using a term they disagreed with and she let them have it in front of a group. There are also grammar issues throughout the book. She frequently uses the phrases “most folks“ and I would like to know what data she has to support that statement.

A lot of her opinions are presented as fact. I did get some conceptual takeaways from this book, such as not doing other people‘s jobs for them, if you let people do what they’re supposed to they won’t let the ball drop, don’t put yourself in danger to be an advocate, etc. For me, her communication style resorts too often to finger pointing instead of seeking to understand the perception of those that she blames.

Finally, and I know this is petty but it’s a particular pet peeve of mine… During times I listened to this book on audiobook, she said axe instead of ask several times

[Kate · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was a book club pick and I was really looking forward to it.

I found it interesting in that I had assumed it would be limited to DEI issues, or better ways to be an ally, but really it only touched on that briefly. Moreso it was about advocating for yourself in all situations, not just ones related to allyship. I think I was hoping it would be more "how to be an anti-racist" and less "how to deal with customer service representatives," although I do think this makes the book more of a valuable tool. It becomes applicable to situations in which many of us find ourselves, even in the most inclusive work environments.

[Brian · Rating 3 out of 5]

This could serve as a roadmap, playbook, and guide to anyone looking to learn or teach how to speak up without creating the stereotypical 'waves'. It wasn't clear that the messaging, behaviors, and actions were mostly DEI driven/focused until already into the book, but most of the takeaways apply to general better life practices. Anyone looking to build a program or an awareness would certainly benefit not only from the step-by-step outline here, but also from some of the best instruction, clarity, and communication around the subject matter- not to mention very, very practical use cases.

[Amber-Rose · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is great! I got it from the library, but I am thinking if purchasing it so I can reference. It provides really great guidelines for how to stand up for others and ensure that the environment that I'm in is inclusive and equitable. Really recommend for anyone who is seeing problemtaic things being said or done in the workplace, but you don't feel confident that you can say something in the "right way".

[Kendall Branham · Rating 4 out of 5]

Read for EMRG book club. Liked how she started with definitions because it framed how the author thinks about DEI. I loved all the examples and direct examples of how to respond in various situations. I feel like there were also great points about setting boundaries and advocating for yourself as well as others through the book which I appreciated!

[Rohan Malpure · Rating 4 out of 5]

It's not often that a book about inclusion, speaking up, and the importance of equity makes for a good read, but here we are. Cabral manages to share a lot of valuable information and advice without the book dragging or ever becoming uninteresting.

[Olivia Halverson · Rating 3 out of 5]

Towards the end of the book, I appreciate how many of the topics come together through actionable strategies and real-life scenarios, however some of the verbiage feels passive in nature. To each their own and I think this is a great starting point to having tough conversations.

[Tricia · Rating 3 out of 5]

Hard copy.

I read this as part of the company's ongoing DEI efforts.
It is a great manual on how to stand up for yourself and others. There are so many situations and scripts involved that help you learn to hold your coworkers and workplace accountable for DEI principles.

[Pavitra · Rating 5 out of 5]

We lead a book club meeting around this book earlier this year and found it profoundly fascinating. As a person of color and immigrant I could connect to the book from the beginning. The steps and tools that the author share are very useful!

[Elizabeth · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was introduced to Amber's work in 2021 and learned so much from her first book, Allies & Advocates.

This book, Say More About That, builds on Allies & Advocates, but is also incredibly informative and useful in itself. Amber has an incredibly accessible style and uses very clear scripts and sample language to help us understand when and how to speak up. It is incredibly useful how to speak up for others.

I work in HR for a smaller public facing organization, and I get to support our staff in creating an inclusive workplace culture. We'll be sharing this book for our next book club choice, and I know the tangible information will be an impactful resource for our team.

I listened on Audible, Amber is a great narrator too.