Take What You Need: Life Lessons after Losing Everything

by Jen Crow

Jen Crow's transformation was triggered, quite literally, by a bolt of lightning. That jolt, which destroyed her home in a subsequent fire, forced her to consider what she really needed as she looked to rebuild her life.

In Take What You Need Crow opens new perspectives for all of us looking to understand our past, our unexpected suffering, our failures, so we too can begin charting a course forward--one drawn from resilience and hope. We see with the immediacy of someone who nearly lost it all that our possessions won't carry us. Our responses to the regrets, losses, separations, addictions, and unexpected twists and turns of our lives are shaped by the spiritual values that sustain us and the people who support us.

Crow invites us to explore the expected and unexpected turns our lives can take--and all the ways we can pay attention to what we truly need to survive the painful moments and live lives of meaning. Survival guide, spiritual companion, and a light in the dark, Take What You Need offers hope, humor, and real-life spiritual tools to meet the hardest moments of our lives.

Genres: Nonfiction, Book Club, Self Help

216 pages, Kindle Edition

Published March 22, 2022

Reviews

[April · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great read! Almost instantly I found myself in the pages of this book. What a testament to the human spirit that our experiences add up, good and bad, to give us just what we need when life gets hard (and boy can it get hard!!) You certainly don't need to have a house fire to relate to the tears and triumphs this book offers. Whether it's sick parents, cross country moves, failed relationships, difficult family dynamics, deep emotional trauma, a significant life event, or just trying to navigate a random Tuesday afternoon when I have a bad case of the "I quit!"s - this book touched a tender spot in me that needed some attention. Some validation. Some encouragement. I laughed, cried, cringed, celebrated, and felt all the feelings right along with the author. This book is real, raw ,and relevant. It's also an easy read for a busy girl - and worth every minute! I'll be revisiting these pages often as part of my tool kit.

[Valerie Andel]

This was a helpful read and applicable for most people who have experienced any sort of past trauma.

[Sara · Rating 4 out of 5]

A powerful memoir about life after a house fire and about alcoholism and growing up with a parent with mental illness. Written by a UU minister.

[Michelle Barker · Rating 1 out of 5]

I read this for a book club and could not wait for it to be over. I suspect this only got published because Jen Crow is a unitarian universalist minister. I'm also a UU, so not casting judgement on that, but I'm thinking most of this book started out as homilies originally delivered at church. It's not solely about the house fire. It seems like she's reflecting on different events in her life then trying to tie it back to the house fire.

I recently went through several traumatic events, and that is why I decided to join the book club in reading this book. My experience of the outpouring of community has not been like the author's experience. I've found that for one or two traumatic things, friends are quick to jump in and help at the beginning. But when your traumatic experience is unending, when you experience new trauma every day with no solution in sight....those helpful individuals have their limits and in time you will be left alone to sink or swim. I've been in Crow's shoes. When your friends envelope you in compassion and you feel that overwhelming gratitude, but unfortunately it's not always like that. We don't all have the privilege she does. So I found it difficult to connect with this book.

[Darian · Rating 4 out of 5]

As someone who has experienced a house fire, this book was EXTREMELY helpful. I was literally captivated at the first page. Her story is inspiring as she suffers from alcoholism and explains her steps to recovery as well.

Jen Crow has really calmed my soul. I’ve realized that I should be thinking of my burned home in the ways she does too. After losing my entire childhood, this book became my safe haven.

I’m going to keep this book out on display in my temporary house’s living room to remind myself of how far I’ve come. I want to take it with me all the way up to the moment I step foot in my brand new house. I want to be reminded every time I look at the cover that I will always have a heart left open that is ready to heal over and over again.

Thank you for sharing your story Jen Crow.

[Kristin Maier · Rating 5 out of 5]

Jen Crow's book, Take What You Need, is wise, engaging, and full of surprises.

A bolt of lightening in the middle of the night leaves her and her family rushing into the dark rain with barely time to grab shoes and each other.

As she begins to try to put her and her family's world back together, their harrowing escape from the destructive fire swirls together with experiences and lessons from her earlier life.

Richly told stories of struggle and hard won victories inspire and move. Jen Crow shows us how faith and hope, even when borrowed or gifted from others, can help us navigate through the most difficult struggles to find a place of acceptance and love that even fire cannot take.

[Winter Miller · Rating 5 out of 5]

This sweet, tender book is a love letter to community, to hope, and to a more nuanced approach to falling on your knees. The story moves back and forth between a current tragedy, the loss of everything (but not the family) to a fire, and from Crow's youth, as she tried to fit into a family unready to give her what she needed as a child and young adult. Crow's struggles are human, her triumphs engagingly celebratory. It's a book that makes you want to spend your sundays with Crow, hearing her life lessons as open homilies.

[Ruth Maitlen · Rating 4 out of 5]

A little repetitive, but full of good advice from lady who has been through a lot and seems like she's a rocking' good pastor. What I needed from this book: "Grief and gratitude can live side bu side."

[Caroline · Rating 5 out of 5]

I love this so hard. Resilience and Love.

[Linnea Nelson · Rating 5 out of 5]

heartfelt and raw emotion

Jen crow draws us into her world and creates context for the truth to emerge. Lessons on living through more than one kind of hell prevail. A deep read.

[Robin Livingston · Rating 5 out of 5]

Thank you Rev. Crow for sharing your story, wisdom, and love that will not let us go.

[Tracy · Rating 5 out of 5]

For some reason this just resonated with me. I have not lost everything, but the lessons taught hit a chord with me. I recommend this to all to read and take what you will from it.

[Mary · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book throws the doors of my heart wide open. I learned so much about Jen's life and her deep soul, which invited me to be more curious about my own. This is a book I'll read again and again.

[Joe · Rating 3 out of 5]

Better than I had originally anticipated, Take What you Need is a story about recovering from an incredible loss, in this case a fire that took most of Jen Crow's, her partner, and her children's lives. There's much that is authentic contained in these pages. Jen discusses the necessity to show up for her family even when she herself is exhausted by the loss. While grateful for everyone in her community that offers help during that trying time, she's faced with uncomfortable truths about her past and also what's needed to move forward in life.

[Jen · Rating 4 out of 5]

Crow lets you right up in there - sharing both the tender moments, like when her young children show her the way (taking caring care of each other and developing resilience beyond their years that will make your heart ache) AND the not so easy moments, her own growing pains, abuses, defiances.

She cuts no corners and shows you what it takes to do the hard work of examining what you really need, how to ask for and accept help when you do need it, and when to recognize what you maybe already have within you.

[Dogsandbooks]

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