Did That Just Happen?!: Beyond "Diversity"—Creating Sustainable and Inclusive Organizations

by Stephanie Pinder-Amaker, Lauren Wadsworth

An accessible guide showing all people how to create and sustain diversity and inclusivity in the workplace—no matter your identity, industry, or level of experience.

Offering real-life accounts that illustrate common workplace occurrences around inclusivity and answers to questions like "How do I identify and handle diversity landmines at work?" and "What can I do when I've made a mistake?," this handbook breaks down ways that organizations (and all people) can improve their cultural awareness and become more equitable in their work and personal relationships.

We know that diverse teams are stronger, smarter, and more profitable, and many companies are attempting to hire more diverse teams, but most struggle to create a real culture of inclusivity in which people from all backgrounds feel comfortable. As clinical psychologists, as well as individuals with marginalized identities, Dr. Stephanie Pinder-Amaker and Dr. Lauren Wadsworth show the emotional and physical impact of marginalization and how that leads to a decrease in employee engagement and, often, increased job turnover.

"Did That Just Happen?!" will be invaluable for employees who come from underrepresented communities and identities (identities discussed include race, age, disability, sexual orientation, citizenship status, and gender expression). But the book is essential for leaders of companies, supervisors, HR departments, and for anyone who wants to understand and support diversity/equity/inclusion practices. The book will also make readers feel more confident in their navigating of friendships/interactions with people who hold different identities.

Genres: Nonfiction, Business, Leadership, Audiobook, Education

216 pages, Hardcover

First published April 6, 2021

Reviews

[J. Michael Smith · Rating 5 out of 5]

I didn't expect to give this book 5 stars when I picked it off my local library shelf. As a pastor of a church, as a white, cisgender, heterosexual male who cares about others experiences and wants to make our institutions more just and my own behavior more thoughtful, I picked it up out of duty.

The first part of the book consists of several stories of individuals who have experienced "Identity Related Aggression." In other words, individuals they encountered made assumptions, based on "identity," that resulted in insult or interference.

Written by two clinical psychologists, the book is tough, practical, smart, fair, and forward looking. I especially liked the "language" they offered to help me understand and identify how people are mistreated because of age, disability, mental health diagnosis, religion, race, ethnicity, socioeconomic status, sexual orientation, national origin, citizenship status, gender identity, language, and gender expression. All these realities are referred to by the authors as "Rising Identities."

One issue in American culture is the anger over "political correctness." The authors' careful use of language does not scold, but rather helps us speak more truthfully about realities that exist. A glossary at the end of the book is worth reading, even if one does not read the whole book.

But do read the whole book. The first section is "testimonial" as we say in the church. The second is analysis. And the third is prescriptive. The prescriptive section applies to those who are part of a people who have rising identities, those who lead organizations, and those who know they have offended from time to time.

The middle part of the book was most helpful. The authors call on us all to be better listeners. (a no brainer) But they help us out by pointing out the difference between Empowering Listening and Oppressive Listening. An oppressive listener refuses to be curious and broach the topic, tries to remain in the "expert" seat while listening to another person's story, blames an unchangeable system for the problem, blames the victim, dominates the conversation with surprise and emotional outbursts, diminishes the other's experience by making analogies, tries to fix the problem, justifies bigoted comments and actions by trying to explain the heart or "intent" of the offender, and jumps in to the be savior of the problem.

The authors are sympathetic to those who listen. We can hear so much sadness in another's story that we feel compelled to cut off the listening and get started with the "solutions."

The authors remind us that IRAs (Identity Related Aggressions) are often subconsciously engrained in individuals, organizations, and society itself. Work in any one area does have an impact in the other two, albeit slowly.

There is a good section on how people of rising identities have to make compromises to make it in systems that are oriented to exclude or inhibit them. People often have to hide who they truly are with others, an act that takes its toll through fatigue, discomfort, loss of joy, loss of self-actualization, loss of creativity, and burnout. Persons of color cannot hide that aspect of their identity, and so take to cross-switching when they are working in an organization or around people who are not persons of color.

The authors call on readers to proactively practice "cultural humility." This is the realization that our own culture limits us from seeing and understanding experiences and phenomena from other cultures. Cultural humility recognizes how our own cultures limit our knowledge and wisdom and call on us to constantly be willing to learn what we don't know: a lifelong task.

There is an intriguing section on the difference between an oppressive apology and an empowering one. An oppressive apology takes too long, makes excuses, focuses on the behavior and intent of the aggressor (rather than the effect on the person injured), makes the feelings of the apologizer paramount, prematurely asks for forgiveness and understanding. An oppressive apology forces the wronged person to take care of the one who did the wrong.

I'm fairly open minded and "up to date," (even though my daughters often roll their eyes at me) and I found this book to be helpful and a growing experience. I'll incorporate it into my work with churches and my writing.

[Jennifer · Rating 4 out of 5]

[Audiobook] A much-needed book on diversity, equity and inclusion. The title feels a little “off” in that it trivializes the subject matter somewhat. Feels redundant at times (a few times I wondered if I accidentally hit the back button). But overall some great anecdotes and suggestions, with a host of proactive terms such as “rising identities” in lieu of minorities.

[Dave Fleet · Rating 4 out of 5]

Of all of the books I’ve read in this arena, this was perhaps the most practical and full of helpful dos and don’ts. I did find that it became a little repetitive towards the end but nonetheless an extremely helpful read and one I imagine myself referring back to many times in the future.

[Mitzi Moore · Rating 4 out of 5]

If you think your organization doesn’t need this book, flip to page 128 and see if it sounds familiar. If so, start at the beginning.

[Sara · Rating 3 out of 5]

Great structure here. Filled with scenarios, including issues that have made the news recently that involved major corporations. Each chapter has a similar format: scenario, why the issue addressed is problematic and what to do about it. The authors provide concrete steps to take, at both the personal and organizational level. Highly recommend for any organization thinking about undertaking a DEI initiative.

[James · Rating 2 out of 5]

Not all good, not all bad, but a generally uneven book rife with spelling mistakes that nevertheless contains some usable information on the topic of workplace EDI.

Some of the things I liked from the book...

The term "rising identities" is much more palatable than saying "minorities" or people who are marginalized. This was the first place I heard that.

The language regarding hairstyles in the workplace is great, and if my workplace ever decides to revisit the dress-code issues, I think this would be helpful.

I appreciated the concrete examples given at the beginning of most chapters.

Great conversational style overall.

In the beginning the author's frontload for the potential that not all readers would see their identities in the book. That was smart, honestly, and yet...gawd, it did not prepare for the epic fail.

The one thing I'm going to take away from and remember about the book, unfortunately...

The really cringy and messed up idea of forcing people to use they/them pronouns in a meeting to practice using gender neutral pronouns. Holy fuck. I hope the next binary trans (NO ASTERISK NECESSARY FFS) person they meet verbally burns them down for that. It is misgendering. It is workplace violence. It is unacceptable, given the daily struggle some members of the trans community endure to be gendered correctly. This exercise is an absolute shit show. I hope ANY trans person asked do this will report the incident to HR, document everything, and get a lawyer. An employer has no right to force a transgender person to do this. No. Really. They do not. Period. If there are only cis and non-binary people in the room? Fuck, y'all have it.

Honestly, that was pretty early in the book and I had a tough time taking the authors seriously after that. Basically, just two clueless cis women, who have some expertise in race and LGB issues. That's it. They want to talk about trans issues? No, they need to stay in their lanes, because they do not have the experience or education to mouth off about what trans people need or experience in the workplace.

Okay, aside from that, the book also has the typical issue found in many business-oriented books on EDI in that it is difficult to apply many of the strategies in governmental and non-profit sectors or indeed, even in small to midsize businesses. The book assumes a massive workforce and unlimited budgets...and to be honest, an urban, East Coast environment. The application of most strategies is beyond the capacity of most likely readers. Most places can't just hire someone to do their EDI work. Or even get a consultant.

Overall, I would say pass on this one. Not worth it.

Instead: The Person You Mean to Be (Chugh) is better written and more accessible along with The Leader's Guide to Unconscious Bias (Fuller, et al.).

[Kat Gawin · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is very informative, it shows a real life examples of how people behave and act. These stories are life moments that we all experience in our everyday. Now we can reflect on them. The authors gently guide you to analyze situations that we might not understand , and they give you a reflection of how people may feel and why. They teach how to properly react or what’s the right thing to do if you aren’t sure.
I definitely recommend it! It’s great!

[Beverly Hallfrisch · Rating 3 out of 5]

Is this a great resource and should everyone read this? Yes.
Why am I only giving this 3 stars? Though informational, it is not a particularly handy introductory stand alone reference. There is a lot of background information that would be useful before diving into this. The examples are good, but are too simplistic to give the reader sufficient tools to be applied dynamically. The book merely felt like it was missing some essential component, something I can't quite identify.

[Carianne Carleo-Evangelist · Rating 4 out of 5]

While I think there were chapters that could have been stronger, I overall really enjoyed the advise from the authors here, one Black and the other Queer/white from their own lived experience. The examples were practical and useful, and I really enjoyed their rebranding of microaggression to Identity Related Aggression, because there's nothing "micro" about these, especially how often they're repeated. Practical advice and food for thought for any kind of group

[Joan · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book was not an easy one to read, despite the compelling topic. The font type was light and thin, which didn't help. The information was well-presented; each chapter begins with a relatable story and one of the things I appreciated the most was that the authors offered specific solutions to gaffs which we all make. This is the sort of book that readers will refer to over and over again -- or, at least, they should.

[A B · Rating 4 out of 5]

A clear, narrative, and relatively succinct explanation of foundational DEI concepts, in a sequence where each concept builds relatedly enough to the one prior.

Although it’s a great “starting point,” I would not recommend this book to people who have been working/living in the field of DEI for some time now.

I was given the impression this would be a higher-order exploration of DEI skills and concepts, and it’s okay that it wasn’t.

[Hannah · Rating 5 out of 5]

Dr. Pinder-Amaker and Dr. Wadsworth have compiled a thoughtful, well-written book as much a guide for individuals as organizations in how to put anti-racism in our relationships and larger communities into action. Their examples and interweaving of personal experiences, including the vulnerability of sharing their own, are a beautiful blueprint for making inclusion a reality.

[Susan Franzen · Rating 5 out of 5]

I felt this book offers a practical approach to building a more diverse and equitable working environment, while breaking the illusion that there is a quick fix or a ‘check these boxes’ type of solution; conscientious, deliberate and lasting effort is required. This book is a great help for that, giving concrete examples and suggestions.

[Laila Taji · Rating 4 out of 5]

Only 4 and not 5 stars because I personally do not love vignettes, but the info between them was great. A great resource if you need help validating how and why a concerted effort could and should be made to help people with rising-identities (previously known as minorities or marginalized communities) feel they are truly part of the organization.

[Jennifer · Rating 3 out of 5]

I read this book for our Diversity, Equity and Inclusion book club at work. It certainly gives people in the working world plenty to think about with regards to diversity. I particularly found Chapter 10 "Responding to Identity-Related Agressions" to be helpful.

I look forward to discussing this with our book club.

[Yarel Marshall · Rating 5 out of 5]

I appreciate that the authors acknowledge that what they share is not everything and it is everchanging. They present situations, explain why it is problematic, and give suggestions and resources to be better. I recommend this book as a resource for any work environment.

[Beth · Rating 4 out of 5]

The book offered concrete examples and concrete steps to make your organization a more inclusive organization. By the end of the book it deal feel a bit "pie-in-the-sky," but that only indicates how far we have yet to go.

[Annabelle · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really enjoyed the formatting of the book through each chapter: scenario, why something may have been problematic, and what to do about it. Definitely not the only book you need to read but a good jumping off point definitely.

[AJ · Rating 5 out of 5]

I received this book through my organization. It is a great guide on how to create a sustainable and inclusive organization. I would recommend to anyone who is interested in ensuring their organization is an inclusive place to work.

[Peter Ro · Rating 4 out of 5]

A strong recent guide on providing sustainable diversity in any social environment. Pretty handy.

[Katie C · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved this book, it gave such great examples with stories. It really made me think about what I could be doing better in the workplace.

[Paul Young · Rating 4 out of 5]

Should be on the reading list for every business leader and HR pro, IMO.

[Emily Wolfenbarger · Rating 4 out of 5]

Only 4 years old and it's already got dated language. What a whirlwind the DEI industry is experiencing. Felt like it was targeted toward a white woman. Are you talking to me??