A Quick & Easy Guide to Sex & Disability

Quick & Easy Guides

by A. Andrews

A quick, easy, and educational comic book guide that will help change the way we talk about sex and sexuality for all bodies. 

"This guide can help disabled people (and their partners) on their journey toward self-love, better communication, and confidence." –– Alice Wong, Founder and Director, Disability Visibility Project

All different kinds of bods want to connect with other bods, but lots of them get left out of the conversation when it comes to S-E-X. As explained by disabled cartoonist A. Andrews, this easy-to-read guide covers the basics of disability sexuality, common myths about disabled bodies, communication tips, and practical suggestions for having the best sexual experience possible. Whether you yourself are disabled, you love someone who is, or you just want to know more, consider this your handy starter kit to understanding disability sexuality, and your path to achieving accessible (and fulfilling) sex.

Part of the bestselling and critically acclaimed A Quick & Easy Guide series from Limerence Press, an imprint of Oni Press.

Genres: Nonfiction, Disability, Graphic Novels, Comics, LGBT, Sexuality, Queer

72 pages, Paperback

First published May 5, 2020

Reviews

[Maia · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very short, very easy to read. The art is body and gender inclusive, very warm and friendly. It brings up many good topics, but I did find myself wishing the book overall had been a little longer and gone into slightly more detail. Maybe someday Andrews will pen a more exhaustive guide!

[MissBecka Gee · Rating 5 out of 5]

Every single person can benefit from reading this.
This is a wonderful book to help you figure out what works for you and your partner.
While this can be read as an adult, I do think this would be perfect for teens & even pre-teens.
To help them get comfortable with speaking about and determining what they like and don't like before they actually start having sex.
Getting comfortable with talking about sex is a large hurdle for a lot of people and can help keep them out of some regretful situations with proper communication. Trying something you dislike and/or are uncomfortable with, because articulating the words is unpleasant, doesn't make sex better or easier.

It's a little cheesy, but there are a lot of great ideas in here for being more open and happy with whatever sex life you choose.
Much love to NetGalley and Oni Press for my DRC.

[Archie Bongiovanni Archie Bongiovanni · Rating 5 out of 5]

This comprehensive and beautiful comic is for both disabled folks and able-bodied folks. I think this should be required reading for all people, not just those with disabilities or those with disabled partners. I learned a lot from it. It's written in a way that is for adults and young adults. The emphasis on communication is helpful for folks of all ages. As a sex educator, I found this resource super informative. As a person trying to connect with folks (romantically! sexually!) of all abilities, it's reassuring and helpful. I legit felt like crying at all the beautiful bodies A. depicted! So many beautiful people, all so different and so rarely depicted in comics. That alone makes this book a worthy purchase!

Love this book! Looking forward to seeing it in libraries, sold at sex stores, and on therapist's bookshelves!

[Rod Brown · Rating 3 out of 5]

A straightforward and playful look at sex that shows that communication and consent remain the most important part of the act regardless of anything else. And keeping a sense of humor really helps, because as the author points out, "Sex can be silly."

I'm really liking Limerence's series of quick and easy guides. Be sure to check out A Quick & Easy Guide to Queer & Trans Identities and A Quick & Easy Guide to They/Them Pronouns.

[Anniek · Rating 4 out of 5]

"If there's one thing that just about every disabled person on the planet is beyond familiar with, it's preparedness. In a world that is rarely built to accomodate us, we are often left to our own in adapting to spaces that don't work for us."

I heard great things about A Quick and Easy Guide to They/Them Pronouns and A Quick and Easy Guide to Queer & Trans Identities (although I haven't actually read them yet), so when I saw this book was "read now" on Netgalley, I was very interested to give it a try. It seemed very educational, and I have been wanting to read more non-fiction. Also, as an autistic person, I want to do my best to be a good ally for people with all kinds of disabilities, and I can only do that if I educate myself.

I really appreciated that this was own voices, and I also really loved the art style. Those are two of the positives that I noticed right away. Overall, I mainly appreciated that this was hugely inclusive and hugely positive about disability, and it felt very uplifting and empowering. It was also very queer, yay!

Would definitely recommend this educational graphic novel for just about anyone, because it's very insightful and sex positive.

CWs: ableism

[Katherine Hayward Pérez · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was happy when, at 24 years old, I fell in love. This was something I had always desired yet I was most concerned about my possible partner's reaction to my body and scars from multiple brain surgeries.

For me, living with Spastic Quadriplegic Cerebral Palsy and Hydrocephalus as well as severe eyesight difficulties and being a wheelchair user held enough challenges but I was accepted without question for who I am.

14 years later, and at the time of this review, we are in the year of our first wedding anniversary.

I gained confidence in sexual matters because of my husband's acceptance of me early on.

The book is a comic book but luckily my iPad VoiceOver had no problem reading out. Other formats of comic books did not work.

The approach to the subject matter is mature yet straight talking and laid back. I think it'll certainly help many people (with and without disabilities) feel more at ease with their bodies and sex.

5 stars.

[Anna · Rating 4 out of 5]

A great addition to the quick and easy guides!

I really loved and appreciated the wide diversity in body shapes, sizes, and disabilities portrayed and the art style in general. Definitely one for everyone to pick up.

[Tyler Gray · Rating 5 out of 5]

This very quick & easy guide should be required reading. Whether you are disabled, have a disabled partner, or just want to know how it works.

[Kelly · Rating 4 out of 5]

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for providing this book in exchange for an honest review.
This is a good quick book to read for anyone, not just people with disabilities. I think it would be more useful to teens as it helps reinforce that everyone is capable of having sex. I like that this book mentions that communication is the most important part. And that sex can be whatever the couple chooses and the definition may change for them, which is totally fine.

[The Resistance Bookclub · Rating 5 out of 5]

A Quick & Easy Guide to Sex & Disability is an entertaining introduction to said topic. It includes a lot of very important points for both disabled and non-disabled readers, a lot of which are also applicable to non-disabled sex and easily overlooked in mainstream sex ed. This comic is full of facts and helpful tips and ideas. I especially enjoyed the activity page, making this an interactive read that immediately invites you to think about what you read.
The illustrations and general tone of the comic is great. It's consciously far from clinical and is sure to include different disabilities, body types and skin colours. The art style is very pleasant to look at, being neither clinical photorealistic sex scenes nor shying away from the fact that this is a comic about sex.

[Fanna · Rating 5 out of 5]

A Quick & Easy Guide to Sex & Disability is a perfect pair of art and writing that brings the two themes of disability and sex to the table for an honest, myth-busting, informative conversation. A definitive recommendation that explores everything from finding one's own pleasure points as a disabled person to incorporating it with the very normal sexual wanting. It even dwells into the importance of communication, discussions, and positivity around the focused topics.

Disclaimer: I received a digital copy of this via Netgalley but that, in no way, affects my rating and/or review! Thank you, Oni Press.

[amy · Rating 4 out of 5]

First of all, this authors art style is genuinely one of my favourites! It’s genuinely adorable. Secondly, this was a really great read. I’m always here for sex positive narratives and boy did this deliver! As an able bodied person I feel comfortable recommending this because it’s own voices representation. This set out to demolish the unsurety around sex for physically disabled individuals in general and it totally did that. This book just radiated ‘everybody is fucking sexy’ vibes which i’m all about. Good Shit™

[Libbie · Rating 4 out of 5]

A little cheesy, but I think there is something that anyone can learn from this no matter your age (I'd say 13/14+ is fine), sexuality or whether you or your partner have a disability or not.

I kinda liked the cheesy and humorous aspect of it. Educational books don't need to be a bore and it made it fun yet still respectful.

[Amie's Book Reviews · Rating 5 out of 5]

So, why read a book about sex, and specifically disabled sex, by someone who is not an "Expert?"

The answer to that is: To avoid the typically clinical and frustratingly BORING books on this topic written by supposed "experts." I have read many books and magazine articles written by non-disabled "experts" and those were all so 'dry' they even managed to make sex seem boring and much of the information is, at best irrelevant, at worst dangerously flawed. To take the advice of someone who has never had to live with a disability, is unwise in my opinion. Realistically, how could they know anything about it?

As a queer person living with a disability, A. Andrews is much more qualified to discuss issues surrounding sex & disability than any able-bodied 'expert.' 

I love that the author acknowledges that many people do not think of disabled people as sexual beings, and that they acknowledge the squeamishness with which some  people react to this topic. It is a ridiculous notion and I am happy that the author confronts it head-on.

According to the author, "All disability presents differently. They are all valid, real, and have unique needs and considerations."

That said, this book focuses on sex for people with physical disabilities. After all, that is what the author deals with personally, which is why they are qualified to discuss it. It would have been a ridiculously long book if sex for every type of disability were to be discussed.

The emphasis placed on communication is great advice which applies to everyone, disabled or not. Included are some suggestions as to how not to offend a disabled partner. The illustrations depict a person asking or saying something offensive and offers a way to ask/say it in a nonoffensive way. I have never seen such awesome advice so succinctly shown before. I have to say that I am extremely impressed. Kudos to Author/Illustrator A. Andrews for including such valuable advice.

Let's face it. There are many different types of people and therefore there are many types of sexual partners. This book is designed as a resource for all genders, races, and for any and all sexual persuasions. The illustrations reflect that reality. They depict many different body types, genders, races, as well as different types of physical disabilities.

The illustrations are not sexually explicit, but sex positions are depicted. When positions are shown, there are no views of genetalia. In most illustrations, the people depicted are wearing underwear or are fully clothed. There is a single page containing illustrations of sexual aids, some of which are shaped like male genetalia (but in a tasteful way.)

In my humble opinion, I believe every physically disabled person who is thinking about and/or planning to become (or continue to be) sexually active needs to purchase one or more copies of this graphic novel. It could be casually placed on the coffee table where the potential partner(s) is sure to see it, thus creating the perfect opportunity to begin the dialogue necessary. It would also be an amazing resource to share with anyone who participates in your care. This graphic novel should be available in every local library and every physical rehabilitation center in North America and beyond. In fact, I am planning to speak to my local library as well as at the few physiotherapy clinics near my home.

I rate A QUICK & EASY GUIDE TO SEX & DISABILITY as 5+ Out Of 5 STARS (my highest rating.) ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

To find out more about this awesome graphic novel and to see a sneak peek at the illustrations, visit my blog at http://Amiesbookreviews.wordpress.com

Also be sure to follow me on Instagram
http://www.instagram.com/Amiesbookrev...

[Becky · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was pretty much exactly what it said on the tin. A very insightful look at an own-voices perspective on sex and disability. It's the kind of thing everyone should have a quick read through, if only to enlighten them in an area they may not be familiar with. I loved the illustrations and the fact that the author made it such a chilled out and FUN yet educational read, which can be hard to find on topics such as this.

[Veronica · Rating 3 out of 5]

We received an ARC for this book from the publisher, which I'm grateful for as it gave me a chance to page through and check for age-appropriateness. We've been buying this series (A Quick & Easy Guide to They/Them Pronouns and A Quick & Easy Guide to Queer & Trans Identities) as Teen at my library, and I had a feeling that some people might balk at putting this book in the same location. In order to help other selectors make this decision: there is no visual depiction of genitals in the book, and when people are depicted in sexual positions they are typically wearing underwear (or the area below the waist is not shown). However, there are visual depictions of nipples and sex toys such as vibrators and dildos. The book is straightforward, reassuring, and not erotic in tone, which I think would make it as appropriate for teens as any other sex education book (and it covers ground that other sex ed books may not). I wouldn't say that it was *aimed* at teens, however, and it doesn't cover puberty / menstruation / burgeoning sexuality at all. The book provides a healthy emphasis on consent and verbal communication as well as some practical suggestions. The art is warmly colored and drawn in a visually appealing, cartoonish style. The people depicted vary widely in skin tone and body size, and there is also a variety of scars, body hair, stretch marks, and mobility devices. The writing style is very friendly and knowledgeable without being clinical. Overall, if your library stocks sex education books at all, I would recommend that you add this to the shelf.

[Bianca · Rating 4 out of 5]

Thanks NetGalley for the free e-copy in exchange for an honest review!

This was a great introduction for a topic that we do not often talk about. Imagine that if people already feel awkward about talking about sex, talking about disabled people having sex is even more awkward. But it shouldn't be! Luckily, more and more aspects of everyday life are being adapted for disabled folks and sex shouldn't be an exception.

Throughout this little guide, the author explains how communication is key for a successful sexual experience for everybody, and how that can be specially positive in the case of people with disabilities, since they can make their partners understand them better when faced with something they may have never experienced before and would feel lost otherwise.

As a result of communicating what preferences one has or has not during sex, there is also some talk about positions, accessories, sex toys and the importance of lube! Let's make everybody comfortable about their bodies and leave the ableism aside, also when it comes to sex!

[Isabel · Rating 4 out of 5]

This arc was provided by Oni Press, via Netgalley, in exchange for an honest review.

The thoughts I shared about A Quick & Easy Guide to Queer & Trans Identities are pretty much the same ones I feel about this little book.

To me, this is an essential addition that everyone should get their hands on. Not only does it give a concise definition of what disability means and what shapes it takes, but Andrews also demystifies a few things about disabled bodies and sex with a disability, before diving into the focus of the guidebook.

There aren't any particular negative aspects that I came across while reading this, I appreciated the way everything was explained and how, no matter who you are with, communication and consent will always be critical when in an intimate setting. No matter how old you are, this is a book for all ages and that should be mandatory reading.

Also, the artwork is very engaging and diverse in representation. And it's an own voices' book!

[Laura · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very easy to use, and understand graphic novel style manual on how and whys of sex while disabled. Both LGBTQ and Straight are covered as well.

The main point of the book is to communicate, but that is true, even without a disability, still good to emphasize.



Good introduction for those who are in love with those who are disabled, as well as disabled people who might want to know how others are "doing it."

Recommended reading.

Thanks to Netgalley for making this book available for an honest review.

[metempsicoso · Rating 3 out of 5]

Non penso ci sia molto da aggiungere a quello che questa graphic novel dice di sé a partire già dal titolo: è un breve e facile introduzione al tema della sessualità quando questa si interseca con la disabilità.
Curata e accessibile, tratta quello che può nello spazio che ha a disposizione: il fumetto semplifica e rende approcciabile una materia che, però, ha bisogno di una successivo approfondimento.
Leggendo questo fumetto, infatti, ho realizzato quanto poco sono informato sulla materia della disabilità, al punto da non padroneggiarne neppure le parole adeguate. Mi manca il vocabolario per parlare di disabilità e rapportarmi con chi è disabile senza ferirne la sensibilità.
E per il lavoro che faccio, a contatto con il pubblico, trovo sia una mancanza inaccettabile.
Urge correre ai ripari – e farlo con qualche saggio in italiano, che l’inglese, per quanto spesso sia molto più consapevole, non basta. Consigli?

A margine, penso cercherò di recuperare altri volumi di questa collana.

[Jena · Rating 5 out of 5]

Exactly what it says on the tin! A Quick & Easy Guide to Sex & Disability is a candid, high-level look at sex with disability in the mix. It's aimed at both people who are disabled as well as able-bodied partners. A guide like this isn't going to cover everything under the sun, but it did a good job talking about some ways to make sure everyone is consenting, enthusiastic and comfortable - and what to do when you're not. Very useful.

My only nitpick is I didn't really care for the art style, but in a comic like this really the art is just a mechanic to get the message across. I did appreciate the variety of body types and couples we saw in the book.

Rep: Author is queer and disabled.

[dobbs the dog · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was a great, quick read that talks about sex and disability. It is very much a QUICK guide, but it's a great introduction, both for folks with disabilities and folks who are able-bodied.

[thosemeddlingkids · Rating 4 out of 5]

This little series has been great to read. This book focuses on different tips and ways to make accommodations and create comfort and consent when having sex as or with a disabled person. Lots of queer inclusion too!

[T · Rating 3 out of 5]

I wanted to rate this higher, but there’s too many gaps.

While it gets a ton of points for broaching the myths of us disabled people being sexless and some of the awkward things like ‘don’t touch someone’s accessibility aids,’ which you’d hope are obvious to abled people but often aren’t, I felt the content was a bit lacking. I’ll give it some grace for being ‘a quick and easy guide,’ and admitting in its own pages there’s way more that they don’t have the space to cover, thus four stars still, but there’s some big gaps I’m seeing. I was a little annoyed at first at the amount of abled people saying that this book is really for everyone—can’t disabled people have like... one thing? that’s actually for us?—ultimately that’s... not wrong. Many of the topic, while through the lens of disability, are mostly tangential to disability. It doesn’t get much into unique challenges for the most part. Communication is, of course, key. But specific challenges to communication aren’t discussed, really.

In particular, I was quite disappointed to not see myself reflected in the pages at all—I would think that sensory disabilities would be important to talk about if there’s such a heavy emphasis on communication. Instead, sensory disabilities are mentioned as an example of invisible disabilities (not necessarily true) and then never brought up again. Deaf/HOH people have unique challenges to communication. So would the blind.

I feel like it was taken for granted that if you’re communicating with your partner with a sensory disability outside of the bedroom, then you know how to communicate IN the bedroom. An obvious example: would abled people necessarily think about the impact of “mood lighting” on a Deaf/HOH person’s ability to be in the moment? Would that Deaf/HOH people be comfortable and able to properly communicate how something as simple as the visual aspects of play impacts their enjoyment of sex? I have my own experiences with that, even. What an abled (or at least hearing) person might think of as ‘setting the mood’ could be a huge turn-off, or worse, to a Deaf/HOH person.

Just an example. Again, I know it’s a ‘quick and easy guide.’ But not mentioning sensory disabilities at all when your emphasis is on open lines of communication seems like a major gap.

[Saimon (ZanyAnomaly) · Rating 5 out of 5]

A friend told me that it was Read Now on Netgalley so I swooped in there to read it myself cause WE NEED MORE MEDIA THAT IS FOCUSED ON AND INCLUSIVE OF DISABLED PEOPLE.

I appreciated the fact that this was OwnVoices and I loved that the book addressed everything in a comfortable and simple way.

I loved the art style and I loved how inclusive the art was as well. Also the tips.

SO yeah, check it out - a quick important read for anyone and EVERYONE.

[Alix · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved this book! Especially the end part where it lists more books to read for more info! This inspired me to host a sex class for disabled folks in my community I dissociate and have autism and think it would be a amazing thing to do! Thank you to the author and everyone involved for making this!!

[Tracy · Rating 5 out of 5]

This little book struck a chord and made me cry a little. The topic of sex and disability is extremely important on it's own, but the information presented is relevant for all humans. The illustrations are joyful and the tone accessible. I wish I could go back and give a copy to my young self.

[Sara · Rating 5 out of 5]

Exactly what the title says - with warm-hearted art and lots of attention paid to intersectionality and varieties of bodies.

[Lesley · Rating 4 out of 5]

Super body positive and I love the promotion of communication.

[Prathibha · Rating 3 out of 5]

Although titled so, this book will be a good read to everyone, not just for people with disabilities.
A wonderful book that addresses a lot of things and helps one get comfortable with the idea by using the principle that communication is the key. The panels are well articulated and the art style, illustrations, the overall tone of the comic is so simple, yet wonderful. What I really liked about the book is that apart from including different disabilities, it made sure to include various body types, skin colors and was gender-inclusive.