Modern Etiquette Made Easy: A Five-Step Method to Mastering Etiquette

by Myka Meier

The founder of The Plaza Hotel's Finishing Program spills her insider knowledge to help you become instantly more polished.
 
In her debut book, Modern Etiquette Made Easy, the Queen of Good Manners Myka Meier takes formal etiquette that she learned while training under a former member of the Queen of England’s household and breaks it down into five easy steps to help you feel 100 percent confident in the areas of social, dining, business, and networking etiquette.
 
In this refreshingly entertaining etiquette guide, Myka combines her passion for etiquette and love of humor to share tips that are sure to give you a competitive edge in both your social and professional life. Through easy-to-follow chapters and relatable lessons, you’ll learn how to: 
Create the best first impression
Become the most coveted party guest
Network like a pro
Practice good table manners
And much, much more!
Perfect for everyone who’s ever gone for the cheek kiss as the new acquaintance offered a handshake, or hobbled home from a networking event in stilettos. Fitting for messy-bun millennials who find themselves suddenly adulting without a clue, or mid-career professionals hoping to revamp their image. Or really, for anyone at all—at the end of the day, we could all use some more respect and kindness, and Modern Etiquette Made Easy offers advice and insight like a friend.
 
Pinkies down!

Genres: Nonfiction, Self Help, Reference, Personal Development, Communication, Business, Audiobook

176 pages, Hardcover

First published January 21, 2020

Reviews

[Peter Gal · Rating 1 out of 5]

I started listening to this book based on the high star rating. I quit it half way. The value per page is minimal, I felt the that she is completely full of herself (e.g. branding every second advice of her a "Myka-ism"), the stories in her book are hardly believable and sound like they are the plot of a cheesy rom-com for teenagers. Extremely disappointed and asked for an Audible refund.

[Bloodorange · Rating 5 out of 5]

If I were to describe this book with one word only, that word would be 'useful.' It goes well beyond the traditional content, and gives you very practical tips - what to do with your hands, how to look approachable at a social event, how to identify people who are open to conversation and how to be a good conversationalist. Above all, it stresses the importance of being attentive to people, and uplifting others.

[Robert Behrman · Rating 4 out of 5]

Picked this up because I'm a mid-career professional who wants, some day, to be near the top of his profession. I've had a couple experiences where I was dealing with people and situations outside of my comfort zone, and wanted some tips for when I do so again.

This is an easy book to read in one sitting, but a lot of the advice that was most useful for me will require a couple more looks, memorization, and practice (for example, her formula for making conversations with complete strangers at a meet-and-greet). The advice in the book is sound and easy to understand, though she uses a lot of formulas and mnemonics (annoyingly named Myka-isms) that need to be studied and rehearsed. Next time I have to go to a formal event I'll brush up on the detailed sections.

I rated it four stars because I found several parts completely off-putting. I can't relate to her enthusiasm for all things royal or her focus on fancy clothes. I'm vaguely revolted by the notion that I'll ever have to deal with someone who can articulate the thought "pretty face, wrong fork." I defer to her advice on these situations - she deals with them far more than I - but I'm still unsure how to get comfortable with them, or whether I want to.

Ultimately, though, the part of the book that I love the most is a line she repeats a couple times - if you go to a party dressed to the nines, eat with immaculate manners, and ignore the person sitting alone in the side of the room, you're missing the point of etiquette. That simple advice truly wins me over on her concept.

[L Dawson · Rating 5 out of 5]

A small book that not only inspires you to be a better person, but also gives you practical advice on how to do so. Thank you, Mrs Meier, for sharing your knowledge of good manners and social graces in a way that motivates personal growth and to show kindness to ourselves and others.

[Richard · Rating 1 out of 5]

I honestly don't think it's important how many inches you sit away from a table, and I wouldn't really want to be around anyone who does. This book is full of advice like that, reinforcing a pretty elitist view of the world about 'proper' behaviour - which is all clearly coded conservative language.

Quote in point: "To excuse yourself from a party for a cigarette, announce to the office you had too much champagne last night, or to state any vice whatsoever is inappropriate chatter"

It's 2022, not 1860.

[Edie · Rating 5 out of 5]

A good overview of modern etiquette. The book discusses topics ranging from table etiquette to networking.

[Adrian · Rating 4 out of 5]

Loved this one, didn't expect to be such an eye opener on being more compassionate and respectful towards other people by putting the necessary effort into the way you present and handle yourself in social situations.

A small guide to etiquette with some really powerful rules that have already stuck in my head ranging from daily activities such as the way you caress yourself, walk, speak, get out of the car, enter a new room or even take photos and of course.... dining !

Examples:

2/3 rule - There are three areas regarding the way you present yourself : skin, hair and clothing. Even when running errands and having a busy day, always prepare two of the three.

When you meet someone new you form a first impression in the first 7 seconds, so when entering a new room, do it with your right hand on the doorknob, and close it with your left hand so that your face/mug :) always targets the audience. You do not want to be with the back at your audience in that little interval.

In general the book is packed with really great examples, some enriched with illustrations.

The reason i gave it 4/5 is because it feels like a tutorial and i wanted some parts to be more meaty, have more substance.

All in all a good starter book !

[Hannah Flowers · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very helpful.

[Christina Burt · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a fun and informative read for those who are interested in delving into one of the facets of being a better human. This book covers some great etiquette tips…and it’s not just about table manners, folks!

[Mariann Fourny · Rating 2 out of 5]

Wasn’t sure how many stars to give this book. I love etiquette, but I felt this was more of a self-help book than a book about modern etiquette.
And I’m not fond of American self-help books because they seem more to be badly hidden gloat mixed in with stories you don’t believe in. And that’s not very gracious.

Mrs Meyer is starting her book about how she was basically a slob coming from the states to England and realising she was under dressed and didn’t know any etiquette.
Later when she gives us examples how to improve oneself, she gives stories about her life before the etiquette courses. And sometimes those advices are 180 turns away from the etiquette described.

Many times I also see the same sentence repeated multiple times. Which surprises me coming from someone with an apparent degree in communication.

Now give me a book about etiquette and explain the history of it and why it is important. This book used way to much time telling me to lower my pitch and go talk to people than actually explaining stuff.

[April · Rating 5 out of 5]

Honestly I was not expecting much from this book, but I ended up loving it! I forgot how great it feels to be more polished. Taking a few extra minutes to think about what we are doing not only helps us to enjoy the moments but also helps us to get more out of each and every minute. I will start to practice these tips ASAP and I look forward to the confidence that will soon follow.

[Hannah Simpson · Rating 5 out of 5]

I truly loved this book and bought my own copy after checking it out from the library. I feel more confident after just one reading and I am certain I'll refer back to it in the future. I appreciate Meier's humble approach to etiquette. I especially liked her framing etiquette as the ultimate way to show respect to those around you.

[ciera · Rating 2 out of 5]

Could be worth a reread instead of audio if I’m not able to find another, better, etiquette book. Sad to see how many of these customs are lost in overly casual modernity. Disliked the author, her weird acronyms, Myka-isms, and self promotion especially with how long it took to /get into/ the book, providing a lot of name dropping in her self introduction.

[Meg]

Hmmm, I'm sure there are good suggestions here. It's just hard to put them to practice during the anti-gathering times. I liked the advice for being a good conversationalist + linking questions and compliments.

[Ellie Huff · Rating 5 out of 5]

Such a great book of etiquette tips! I love how she emphasized that etiquette isn’t about being overly formal or fancy - it’s about making yourself feel confident and those around you feel comfortable and respected. I love following Myka on Instagram for her little tips there as well.

[Lizzie · Rating 4 out of 5]

An interesting book

Wasn't exactly what I wanted but very good and worth reading to brush up on my own manners when out or even at home

[MaryLucille · Rating 5 out of 5]

4-1/2 stars to 5 stars!
I have long read etiquette books and greatly enjoy the nuances of proper etiquette. Meier’s is an up-to-date, 21st century one and covers topics I have never seen covered before. Very interesting and quite well done.
This would be an excellent gift for a high school or college graduate or even for younger teenagers. I dare say many in the older generation could profit.
The only thing I disagreed with, and I am old hat, is addressing a woman on a mailing envelope. I have always been taught that Mrs. Jane (given name) Doe indicated a divorced woman. Either use Mrs. John Doe (even for widows) or Jane Doe (without a title.) Meier has different rules.
I highly recommend this book. You will become more comfortable and confident in being kind and respectful to others in all situations.

[Honoree · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is an absolutely charming book that gives wonderful insight and provides a great education for anyone who wants to exhibit class, elegance, and excellent manners. Should be required reading, IMHO, by everyone! I’ll be putting so many of the tips shared into practice for many years to come. Well done!

[Sammy · Rating 4 out of 5]

An ok read... not for everyone.

[Deborah · Rating 4 out of 5]

It was good

[Chelsi W · Rating 5 out of 5]

While not all of the advice is applicable to my life, I really enjoyed listening to the authors advice on how to present yourself and how to make others feel honored and comfortable

[Pavithra]

The book rekindled my love for afternoon tea. I did learn a lot after reading the book like how to hold a coffee cup, history behind the handle in a tea cup, names of various cutlery, holding glassware, good reason not to clink glassware, why not to ask someone what they do in a conversation (who would have guessed? I was quite convinced after reading her explain).When I said I am reading a book on etiquette, I frequently got comments that - It is so elitist, Is that so I could annoy others. It seems like the term etiquette gets equated to an 'holier than thou' attitude. This is about being good mannered with respect to the culture that you are in, which also includes respecting people; not to feel superior, thats atrocious. I also like that she mentions that Etiquette is being kind and considerate.
The only issue I had with the book was the frequent use of myka-ism and meier method. I mean when you are the creator, then its your method. Is there a need to mention that? I would definitely recommend this for a lots of good tips that can be applied to most western countries.

[Sage · Rating 5 out of 5]

The book was 70% ‘modern’ etiquette and 30% ‘traditional’ (old school) etiquette. I’d rename the book to “Modern WESTERN Etiquette…” as the book describes the different types of Western etiquette. I think that’s a very important thing to note, as Western etiquette is not the world’s standard.

The supplemental .pdf (for us audiobook listeners) was helpful, though I would have liked for the section about Mr./Miss/Mrs. to be spelled out in that .pdf. I had to constantly rewind that part.

My favorite part was about how to present oneself when networking with other people, and how to maximize those first 7 seconds one has to make an impression… fascinating and clever!

I appreciated the brief historical references mentioned in some parts which quenched my curiosity as to where some of the traditional etiquette rules came from. The modern references were helpful. Many of the tips I feel like I can start putting into practice today, while others may come in clutch for a more opportune time that I’ll need that knowledge or that I can begin preparing for now.

Lastly, I enjoyed the speaking voice of the audiobook voiceover. It made it enjoyable to listen to. I sat for hours taking pages of notes as I listened.

There are two ways you can receive this book: 1) as a downer as it may highlight where you have unknowingly fallen short, or 2) inspirational with excitement to finally fill in the gaps of what you did not know before. This book is definitely not for people who don’t care what other people think or maintain a spirit of “doing me.” This book could be a game changer for how you present yourself in social circles and how you’re received by others.

[Bulou Varanisese Drodrolagi · Rating 4 out of 5]

I personally enjoyed reading about the author’s journey as a business woman. I love her willingness to pursue her passion and make it happen in the big apple! Thank you for publishing!

Only reason for a 4 star:
I found it distasteful how that the author kept referring back to Prince Harry and Megan in the book. They’re not the best examples for Royal conducting proper etiquette among social circles & public events. Leaving them out as examples would have worked best for this book.

The best tips were found towards the end of the book, which is unfortunate because I found myself wishing I had just skimmed trough the book instead. Often times when I pick up a self help book, I expect it to help my situation, and not go through “authors life story”/ fan girling over partying with British Royalty. Although meeting Royalty can be exciting, sticking to the script for the book, and being humble about your private life experience with Royalty should always be private.

Royal tip (if you’re meeting a Royal, became friends or shared a moment); never recall that personal memory to make money off of it by publishing about it in public; it never looks good for anyone.

[Ann · Rating 4 out of 5]

Eye opening book about etiquette, from the premise that it stems from kindness and respect. This is actually a bit harder to follow in the audiobook format, so I highly suggest reading a print version over listening to it. I have definitely learned a few things in listening to this book and it sounds like a great addition to a personal library. I plan to look in Mrs. Meier's business etiquette book as well.

[Julie · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 stars. This book is a nice etiquette starter, but a good portion of this short book is about the author. She "drops" some names to give proof of her status, but I'm not sure that is good etiquette. There are some instances that I would disagree with her; i.e. "kissing" on the cheek as a greeting in America is rarely done. Most people would find it strange and uncomfortable. Do this with caution. Another example is tea etiquette in America: If you are at a casual party and are served a teabag, it is okay (and in some cases preferred) that you wrap the string around the teabag to extract some of the water. This cuts down on the chance of dripping on its way to the trash or on the table. Don't be aggressive with it, but just a little extraction helps to keep things clean. I wouldn't do this at a restaurant.

[Didem · Rating 2 out of 5]

Myka Meier sounds like a sweet and pleasant person, but I couldn't believe how poorly written this book was. It had very obvious editorial errors and wonky, repetitive sentences that made it a difficult and distracting need.

For example, in one passage, it says "the Newton's rule" when I believe they want to refer to the so-called Murphy's law to describe what can go wrong, will go wrong. I get that Ms. Meier is an etiquette consultant and isn't a professional writer, but how can editors at a prestigious publishing company get away with these things? Don't they have fact checkers or at least a proofreader?

IMHO, the book needed two more rounds of thorough edits before it should have been allowed to go public.

[Taneli Repo · Rating 1 out of 5]

I bought this book to brush up my knowledge of etiquette. I picked up a recent book because, you know, the dos and do-nots have been changing a bit too fast for anybody’s comfort.

Make no mistake: it’s a waste of money. Instead of giving almost any useful information, this books contains silly and obviously made-up anecdotes of a young American woman who supposedly went to an expensive ”etiquette school” in Europe.

No need to finish this book and no need to buy it unless you already made the mistake.

[Ana · Rating 2 out of 5]

Modern Etiquette Made Easy is an entertaining mix of memoirs with etiquette and a motivational pep talk on overcoming shyness at social functions. It's a short read with many basics: setting a table, handshaking, dressing, and other day-to-day topics. I was expecting more emphasis on less familiar areas of etiquette, such as travel or even eating a whole lobster. The author seemed to dwell too much on silly things, such as how far away from the back of a chair to sit. She repeatedly said etiquette wasn't about being pretentious; however, her advice came across very pretentiously.

[Alanna · Rating 4 out of 5]

I’m going to buy this book and reread it every six months.

I love the way the author describes etiquette: Manners that help others around you feel more comfortable through kindness and respect. The book offers tips on how to navigate social interactions in ways that can help everyone feel more comfortable. Love it!