Heart of a Wife: The Diary of a Southern Jewish Woman

by Helen Jacobus Apte, Marcus D. Rosenbaum

In 1995, NPR editor and producer Marcus D. Rosenbaum met his grandmother-fifty years after her death. Rosenbaum and his family were attending to the bittersweet business of cleaning out the family home after his father died when, in an old closet, in a ziplock bag, his niece discovered a gateway to the early part of the century and into the life of Helen Jacobus Apte, a Southern Jewish woman living in post-Victorian era Florida and Georgia. The covers of his grandmother's diary were cracked and the pages were beginning to yellow, but there it almost forty years of passion, doubt, love, and life, penned in unflinching candor. Heart of a The Diary of a Southern Jewish Woman is the collection of Helen Apte's own diary and essays by her grandson, Marcus D. Rosenbaum, who edited the volume. This book reflects Apte's unorthodox, complex, and independent spirit during a very conservative time. Her shockingly frank opinions are offered on sex, marriage, children, religion, and her native South. Crafted in the heartwarming yet heart-wrenching style of Angela's Ashes and A Midwife's Tale, Heart of a Wife allows the reader a unique glimpse at significant events that gripped the world during the first half of the twentieth the Great Depression, the World Wars, and the sinking of the Titanic are but a few.

Genres: Judaism, Memoir, History

222 pages, Hardcover

First published October 28, 1998

Reviews

[Susan]

A fascinating book , actually a diary which was never intended for publication- wish I could remember who gave it to me. An upper middle class Jewish woman growing up in Atlanta and moving, after marriage, around the South. Experiencing her husbant's business and financial difficulties, living through WW I, the depression. Experiencing very little anti-Semitism personally, but her family was related to a Jewish man who was lynched by an anti-Semitic mob (which she does not mention in this diary oddly enough!)
Interestingly, for a "happily married lady" she writes about her passion and interest in men other than her husband and eventually tells him that she doesn't think affairs in a marriage are necessarly a problem. As she writes about the temptations she has resisted throughout her marriage.
Highly recommend this book.

[Sarah Patt]

This was an interesting read. I think Marcus D. Rosenbaum did a nice job recounting his grandmother's life by sharing her personal diary for the world to read. I liked his Acknowledgements, Introduction, "who's who" snip it, and his note on editing. At the very end, his Epilogue was well written too and Appendix B was very impressive; he included his grandmother's very long list of books she read and the short reviews she herself gave them. How apropos that I am reviewing her diary! ;) My ultimate favorite part was Appendix D: "The Truth About Grandma" by Helen Apte where she wrote down seven "clues" basically explaining how her grandson David is the best child in the whole wide world!!! The nicknames she gave him were priceless too! Overall, it was an endearing read.

[Meagan]

A very interesting look inside the mind of someone who, from their picture, you would never have guessed the deep range of emotionality and passion and yearning that lived in their breast. We make the mistake of looking at black and white, unsmiling pictures, and viewing their hearts as much the same. A sometimes very sad look into the effect the two world wars on a deeply personal level.

[Rivkah]

I loved reading this book
It is the true diary of a Jewish woman from 1901-1946
Who lived in Atlanta
Since I lived in Atlanta Ian’s also Jewish
I truly enjoyed reading about her life and marriage comparing to my life here from 1984 until present time
We even prayed at the same synagogue

[Marija]

This is a woman I know I'd never have been friends with had I known her in person, but oddly enough I felt a kinship to through her diary. Why? I have the feeling she exuded a certain persona that was very different from her true essence.

Apte was a socialite, married to a successful business man, who never had to work a day in her life. She was privileged, traveled extensively, met friends frequently for dinner and cocktails. Shoot me now, to live such a life.

Still, still, she loved her quiet moments. She loved culture and literature. She was a heck of a good writer. And she suffered from depression. These are the nuggets I loved in her, and it kept me reading her diary until nearly the end. Toward the end, she decided to write about public events, mainly about World War II, and keep the personal off the page. Too bad. She was feisty and flirty, and I'd have loved to spend her last years with the personal.

I appreciate the fact that her grandson, who was born after she had died, had the foresight to recognize the quality of writing in her diary and thus brought it to publication.

[Betty]

This was a very personal diary and I wonder, if she had not dropped dead in a Miami department store, would she really have kept it for others to read. She mentions early on that her daughter would read it someday and it would have been a shame to have destroyed it. Her writing is clear and is more than just what she is feeling, but she writes in the context of the events of the time. Her grandson fills out her story with further background information, which greatly adds to the reading. I wouldn't have liked her, I don't think (vanity, thy name is woman), but it made for an interesting read.

[Florence Buchholz]

Helen Jacobus Apte, the author's grandmother, lived a life of privilege. She traveled, she had household help, she never had to work for a living, yet her diary is filled with complaints. Helen seemed to be obsessed with her appearance. She mentions her weight and her appearance frequently yet we never learn until the very end of her diary what her husband did to earn a living. It is curious that she claimed to adore her husband but kept mentioning flirtatious intrigues with male admirers. Well, we all have our flaws and I certainly would not want my diary to be read by anyone. I think she would have been horrified if she knew that her grandson had published it.

[Laurie]

Interesting read about the times, but I was hoping for more information of being Jewish in the South as the title indicated. Helen has a rather comfortable life, lots of moving about, but she remained quite aloof to me. I felt little about her circumstances and stores.

[Katie]

My mom and I really liked this book and we enjoyed reading this woman's diary entries and learning about her life.