How to Survive Death and Other Inconveniences

American Lives

by Sue William Silverman

Many are haunted and obsessed by their own eventual deaths, but perhaps no one as much as Sue William Silverman. This thematically linked collection of essays charts Silverman’s attempt to confront her fears of that ultimate unknown. Her dread was fomented in part by a sexual assault, hidden for years, that led to an awareness that death and sex are in some ways inextricable, an everyday reality many women know too well.
              
Through gallows humor, vivid realism, and fantastical speculation, How to Survive Death and Other Inconveniences explores this fear of death and the author’s desire to survive it. From cruising New Jersey’s industry-blighted landscape in a gold Plymouth to visiting the emergency room for maladies both real and imagined to suffering the stifling strictness of an intractable piano teacher, Silverman guards her memories for the same reason she resurrects archaic words—to use as talismans to ward off the inevitable. Ultimately, Silverman knows there is no way to survive death physically. Still, through language, commemoration, and metaphor, she searches for a sliver of transcendent immortality.
              

Genres: Memoir, Essays, Nonfiction

222 pages, Paperback

First published March 1, 2020

About the author

Sue William Silverman's new memoir-in-essays is HOW TO SURVIVE DEATH and OTHER INCONVENIENCES (University of Nebraska Press), and was listed as "1 of 9 essay collections feminists should read in 2020" by Bitch Media. Her previous memoirs are THE PAT BOONE FAN CLUB: MY LIFE AS A WHITE ANGLO-SAXON JEW (University of Nebraska Press); LOVE SICK: ONE WOMAN'S JOURNEY THROUGH SEXUAL ADDICTION (W.W. Norton), which also aired as a Lifetime Television original movie, and BECAUSE I REMEMBER TERROR, FATHER, I REMEMBER YOU (University of Georgia Press), which won the AWP award in creative nonfiction. Her craft book is FEARLESS CONFESSIONS: A WRITER'S GUIDE TO MEMOIR, and her poetry collections are IF THE GIRL NEVER LEARNS (Brick Mantel Books) and HIEROGLYPHICS IN NEON (Orchises Press). As a professional speaker she has appeared on "The View," "Anderson Cooper-360," "CNN-Headline News," the Montel Williams Show, and the Discovery Channel. She teaches in the MFA in Writing program at the Vermont College of Fine Arts.

Reviews

[TarHeelReader · Rating 4 out of 5]

Do you ever fear your own death? Sue William Silverman does, and so much so, you might say she’s obsessed with it.

Silverman was sexually assaulted, and many of her fears are fed by experience. In a series of essays peppered with insight and humor, Silverman confronts her biggest fear head on.

In more ways than I can list, Silverman is a survivor. If you’ve ever thought you might be a hypochondriac, or just that you worry too much about your own inevitable death, there’s so much reassurance and insight here.

It’s beautifully-written and it helps us confront that taboo subject we don’t like to talk about but we NEED to talk about. Don’t worry- it’s not all about death. It also covers love and loss and has hope and humor in it as well to add some balance. Overall, it’s hard to describe but easy to read.

I received a gifted copy. All opinions are my own.

Many of my reviews can also be found on my blog: www.jennifertarheelreader.com and instagram: www.instagram.com/tarheelreader

[Nursebookie · Rating 5 out of 5]

How to Survive Death and Other Inconveniences
By: Sue William Silverman

Haruki Murakami said that “Death is not the opposite of life, but a part of it”.

Sue William Silverman writes a collection of essays and musings of what might suggest in the tile to be a morbid book, “How to Survive Death and Other Inconveniences”, but in fact is a clever book about a woman who very much wants to live and survive – so much so that she advices to survive death, one must believe in magic, language and memory.

Silverman described death as the Ultima Thule – the great unknown that as much as death may terrify her, she vows to taunt it with “Death: Catch me if you can”.

This latest collection of essays examines her life from a young age of 4 through her teenage years as she taunts death and takes calculated risks. As she gets older and terrified of death, she convinces herself that a headache could be an aneurysm, a stroke, a brain tumor – searching the web for answers and consults 24/7 Google,MD. As a nurse, I found this piece the most fascinating and my favorite essay as she goes on to explain about her obsession and worry about her symptoms, and thank goodness because many times it has saved her from death.

Silverman writes with so much wit and a beautiful way with words. I find her ramblings amusing and best enjoyed savored slowly over a glass of wine. I enjoyed this one.

[Mary Jackson _TheMaryReader · Rating 4 out of 5]

Are you ready for this memoir? Silverman has given us a gift with this one. You will want to grab your favorite drink kick back and devour this one. I'm so thankful that I got a chance to read this, hurry and grab your copy.
I gave this memoir 4 stars.
The Mary Reader received this book from the publisher for review. A favorable review was not required and all views expressed are our own.

[Danica · Rating 3 out of 5]

Sue William Silverman has seen, endured, and survived some intense trauma. She has died multiple times in her life and has come back as a phoenix rising from the ashes. In this harrowing memoir, Silverman shares her deaths and resurrections in a poetic and artful way that almost off-sets the horrific nature of the stories.

While I admire Silverman's strength and prose, it was just not constructed in a way that resonated with me. The stories and certain chapters were beautifully written and kept me incredibly engaged, but the transitions and the tough formatting made it hard for me to stay wrapped up in the story. I felt like I was going every direction and found myself reading about one thing that felt seemingly not connected to the previous.

On the other hand, maybe that's a beautiful way to describe trauma and the life after.

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for the opportunity to read an ARC of this story.

[ReadingGirlReviews (Gina) · Rating 5 out of 5]

I always say, reviewing memoirs are tough.  I mean, if you didn't like the book it's pretty much like saying "hey, your life sucks." RIGHT?  Fortunately with this book I don't have that problem at all, thank god.

How to Survive Death and Other Inconveniences isn't about what you think.  Get that straight right now.  What it is, is a book about Sue William Silverman's obsession with death, how she anticipates it at every turn, and how she can find a way to 'not' fear death. Using quirky and intimate stories, Silverman tells how she explores her memory as a way of surviving death, how her desire to grasp the past is at one with her desire to hold onto life, and that these memories (her memories) exist because SHE exists.  She says "once found, hoard memories, they keep you alive.'

Each story the author tells has a little bit of her life, a little bit of her worry, and a little bit of her drama, be it dangerous or self imposed.  She tells them like she is sitting next to you in a bar having a chat, and you find yourself thinking "oh my goodness, I thought I was the only person who thought that way about things," almost giving you validation as a person that we all obsess over death in one way or another.  Her stories are true, as well as quite pragmatic.  The book reads like a gathering of friends discussing tales of encounters that has left vivid memories that will never be forgotten, some good, some bad, but all of them coming together into a sweet novel of reflection.  An attempt to dwell on the past as a way to become immortal.

Silverman has given us an enlightening way to view ourselves, our life, and our potential death, without us really even realizing we were learning something.  An enjoyable and entertaining read, I now find myself wanting to read the rest of Sue William Silverman's books. I certainly recommend this book and it gets 5 stars from me.

I just would like to thank Sue William Silverman, Suzanne Leopold of Suzy Approved Book Tours and University of Nebraska Press for the copy of this book for my unbiased and honest opinion for review.

[Lauren DePino · Rating 5 out of 5]

I LOVE THIS LINE: “I want an organ specifically designed to monitor an existential crisis.” And this passage, among others:

“Death is tangible and intangible. Death is a heavy summer day when the sun turns jaundiced, mustard yellow. Death is the scent of red bricks in autumn or lilies in spring. Death is a feather that crests a breeze before fluttering to the ground. It is foam that curls a wave before ebbing from sight. Except it’s also an obliteration of senses. But the body itself doesn’t disappear in death: It can be unearthed, touched, studied. Salvador Dalí, best known for his painting “The Persistence of Memory,” was recently exhumed to perform a paternity test. His famous waxed moustache was, by all accounts, still perfectly curled.”

I loved reading this book, which had just the right balance of depth and levity, of brooding and musing. Who doesn’t want to attain personal transcendence? This is Sue William Silverman’s brave and lyrical attempt, and I believe she succeeds.

[Bethany Clark · Rating 4 out of 5]

Do you fear death? Is it something that takes up a lot of space in your thoughts?
For Sue it’s something that she struggles with and in order for her to deal with it she finds humor in these short essays.
Trigger warning: Her fear of death in her mind also was elevated by a sexual assault.
She discusses her fear in many different landscapes - lies awake at night thinking about death and search’s Web MD (never a good idea - it always makes you think your dying of something!)
A death in the family can always plant the fear of death in anyone’s mind.
Growing old clearly doesn’t help the situation either people!
I love how Sue makes these stories somewhat lighthearted and funny at times, this isn’t a heavy, thought provoking read.

[Melissa Grunow · Rating 5 out of 5]

An exceptional collection of essays ruminating on death, life, loss, abandonment, and love. You won't be able to put it down. I sure couldn't.

[MadOnReading · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is an exceptional essay collection. It really is.

I first came across this book when running Book Party Chat, an event designed to help authors whose recent releases have been affected by the Covid-19 pandemic. I interviewed Sue William Silverman, and we had a long chat about this book and her motivations for writing it.

I've long been a fan of memoir, but it's been quite a while since I've read an essay collection, and I was so excited to start. This book is all about death--in many different forms.

We start with an examination of understanding what death could be: "But isn't Death the ultimate Ultima Thule, the final boundary between the known and unknown worlds? What conditions must exist, what to pack in your carry-on, how to prepare to cross that liminal threshold from the State of Being to Non-Being? Better yet: How to escape it altogether? Or is death a great adventure like climbing Mr. Everest that would surely kill me in any event. [...] What is the appearance of the Ultima Thule of Death? Do I find it or does it find me? What does it sound like, taste like? Does death have a voice? Is it pure absence? I might not fear death if I could be alive to experience it."

These questions encourage the readers to think deeply--indeed, what death sounds like and tastes like, isn't something I've particularly thought much about. And the point about how we may not fear death if we "could be alive to experience it" is a fantastic one that raises the role of fear and the unknown in our perceptions of death.

I think it's safe to say that the author is somewhat obsessed by death and what it means. She examines the subject from multiple angles, really delving deep as she processes what it means. And this was a fascinating read, it really was.

Sue William Silverman examines how we can overcome death--in all its many forms--and this largely focuses on preserving our own memories, our record of life. For it is like that overcomes death, and we need to use the power of words and language to breathe life into our memories to allow them to "marinate for eternity": "To survive death you have to believe in magic, language, and memory."

And I love this. As a writer myself, I'm fascinated by the power of words and what language can do. And as a memoir writer as well, I'm particularly interested in how other authors approach writing their memories. HOW TO SURVIVE DEATH is a series of essays, each one showing us a glimpse into the author's life--we're plunged right into her memories in these essays, as we relive specific events with the author. The writing style submerges us in these scenes, and there's a strong feelings of 'being present now' as we read. I think this is because there's so much emotion embedded in the language and the scenes we're being shown; we really feel what Sue William Silverman was feeling at these times. It feels real.

My favourite essay (and this was such a hard thing to pick, because each is so powerful and important and so 'favourite' isn't exactly the right word) is "My Death in the Family." It's opening--"I die at four years old" is just such a powerful line, and I really found this glimpse of a moment in the author's childhood really powerful. Her father is building her a toy--a paper house and dolls--and these are based on their own family. As the author and her father are working on this, Sue feels a sense of disconnection and an almost feeling of fear at her disconnection: "Am I even still here? I pick up the scissors and press the blunt point against my palm. I feel it, but it's a distant ache. As if it's both my palm and not. Maybe it's the palm of the paper girl."

She then goes on to talk of her inexplicable fear of the paper girl, the girl they've crafted from paper that represents her. Sue purposefully makes a rip in the girl's neck, confident that her father will "never notice the small rips and tears in his nonpaper daughter's body". The paper girl with the ripped neck becomes a very apt metaphor as the author then tells readers of the childhood trauma and abuse she experienced, and this sense of disconnection between herself and what she feels--with the introduction of the paper girl as an alternate self--becomes clear as a way of the author processing what is happening: "This paper-like voodoo child is half-dead/half-alive. Her thin shoulder blades feel queasy. She's afraid to glance in the silver, gum-wrapper mirror. She might see only crayon features. Or, worse, no features at all. [...] In the doll's thin, vulnerable body, I see my own thin, vulnerable self."

Identity and the examination of how identity is reborn from the many different types of death is explored a lot in this essay collection, just as the many forms of death are examined.

While the essays in this collection are all drawn from the author's memories, there was one in particular that stood out to me in its examination of memory and how this links to illness and time, and this is "The Safe Side." In this essay, Sue William Silverman talks about bodily sensations and heartbeats, illness, and the reliability of memory. She describes a tip to the ER where a nurse is asking her about her symptoms, and then tells of how "Last night I _think_ a flutter in my heart awakens me" -- already the emphasis on "think" brings in questions of certainty, something which is then examined further as the author contemplates the roles of hallucinations and whether memories can be trusted, both at the time (or the day after she gets these symptoms), and months or even years later when looking back--as the Author's Note at the start of the essay collection tells us that her recollections "shift and change over the years as memories tend to do" and that the events in this book take "place in a compressed time and in non-chronological order, yet I have endeavoured to be accurate in these acts of recollection". I found this so enlightening, using this Author's Note and her ideas on recollection and memory in "The Safe Side" to think about how memories change, as it conjures questions of accuracy and reliability in any memoir at all, for a genre that is all about accuracy and telling a truth.

And this essay feels incredibly honest (well, each essay does). But "The Safe Side" ends with the author being told her heart rate is healthy and that she didn't have a heart attack. "_Some people imagine things_, the doctor said," and the author realises she can't explain the physical sensations she had. She knows she did not dream them, they weren't hallucinations, but medical science is unable to objectively confirm their presence. Therefore, she's only able to rely on her memories of the symptoms she's had, and this then encourages her to think about how death is her obsession and that she imagines death all the time. Yet this essay also spoke to me in terms of the way women are often treated by doctors too--would the doctor have said that some people imagine things, if it had been a man who was presenting with these symptoms that the tests couldn't confirm? I'm inclined to think not.

The writing style of this collection as a whole is wonderfully engaging, while of course being beautifully written. There are so many gems in this book, so many lines that just made me pause and think. As I read it, I found myself underlining so many sentences (in pencil, of course!). This is a book that really makes you think, and it's one that I don't think can be read solidly cover-to-cover in one go, simply because of how rich these essays are. Each requires its own thinking time for us to process and understand what the author is showing us, and what our thoughts in response are.

Overall, this is an incredibly powerful essay collection.

[Kari · Rating 4 out of 5]

HOW TO SURVIVE DEATH AND OTHER INCONVENIENCES
By Sue William Silverman

This book is a collection of memories written in essay form recounting Silverman’s youth and past experiences and traumas that have led her to the point to be so fearful of death and trying to regain a younger sense of self in her middle age. All while she is constantly thinking that something is wrong with her; convinced she has some type of malady that is about to take her life.

She obsesses on how death is going to occur or how it may be occurring each day up until the pivotal moment when it will just take her and she will be dead. Some hidden unknown cancer, undiagnosed disease or from some really far strung theories such as necropsy from getting ears pierced, something she eats or lead poisoning. She is a full blown hypochondriac.

In her younger days as a teenager she was much wilder and freer. Driving recklessly, meeting up with strange men and riding on an unknown man’s motorcycle which ended in sexual assault. Growing up with her pedophiliac father who also sexually abused her and her sexual addiction. These could all be the possible reasons that cause the deep fears of distrust and fear of death in her later years.

Silverman definitely writes with such descriptive stories and albeit it is about her fear of mortality, she sure can put a witty and entertaining spin on it. She is definitely blunt and puts it all out there and I respect the true survivor that she is for achieving the strength to be able to write a novel on all her life’s experiences. I’m impressed that she can turn the pain into humor to make this book a must read for others who have suffered similar tragedies and give them a laugh and give them back an uplifting power that may have been missing before reading. As someone who has suffered sexual assault and a recovered hypochondriac, this book did that for me and I’m thankful.

[Donald Moss,]

Reviewer: Donald Moss, Dean, College of Integrative Medicine, Saybrook University
Key words: Memoir, death, violation, and transcendence

Sue William Silverman, in her previous three memoirs and two poetry collections, has earned a reputation for biting wit, potent language and imagery, and radical transparency.

Her present book, How to Survive Death and Other Inconveniences, guides the reader into explorations of life and death in their many forms. Like a European existentialist, Silverman visits a series of limit situations, situations at the borders of life, that heighten awareness of one’s own frail mortality: rapes, murders, illness, parental deaths, and her own brushes with death.

Her challenges are uniquely her own, reflecting a sexual assault, her years of sexual addiction -- looking for love in all the wrong places -- and her continuing anxious hypochondria. Yet her challenges are in a larger sense also everyone’s challenges, part of being human in finite bodies, vulnerable to illness and death, and subject to violation and loss.

Silverman’s weapons in challenging death include mythic images, archaic words, black humor, and powerful biographic memories. Each section of the book begins with one of the Fates, spinning the thread of life, measuring the thread of life, or cutting the thread of life. Each smaller section begins with an archaic word, such as “chronesthesia” – “the brain’s ability to maintain simultaneous awareness of past, present, and future and to travel back and forth between them.”

The book also includes moments of epiphany, experiencing the eternity of the soul, the eternal now-ness of past and present events, at an Adam Lambert concert and in the (once intact) Cathedral of Notre Dame.

Silverman closes the book with a chapter in which she gathers the images of her life, re-experiencing them, and celebrating the narrative. She pursues personal transcendence and survival in the full awareness of aging and in the nearness of death. The journey ends with her declaration: “So this is my confession, my testament, because if I have to go, I’m not going quietly.”
Do not miss this panmnesic journey!

[Linda Zagon · Rating 4 out of 5]

Sue William Silverman, author  "How to Survive Death and Other Inconveniences" has written a unique and intriguing memoir. There are individual essays in this book that deal with the author's obsession and fear of death. The author addresses traumatic, devastating, and stressful events in her life, as she negotiates the highways of her thoughts and memories. 

The author also skirts and flirts with some dangerous situations that could have had a more tragic outcome. The author walks under the Jersey boardwalk at night by herself or hitches a ride on a motorcycle with a stranger, destination unknown.

The author recalls her first "death", which is emotional at 4 years of age.  She mentions her dysfunctional family, her mother's psychosomatic illnesses, her father being overly affectionate in an inappropriate way, and then how he shows extreme anger later in life.

Although the author is obsessed with death, she finds that she also is frightened that she won't live. She goes to the emergency room when she fears that she is ill, and is told several times it is in her mind. Other times, there is really something wrong. One time, the author has severe side pain, and then it goes away. It is only by contacting the doctor that she finds out her appendix nearly has ruptured. She takes an antibiotic for one infection and winds up with 2 occurrences of C.-diff, which have her really sick, and she fears antibiotics.

Through hypnosis and therapy, Sue William Silverman uncovers some of the reasons for her emotional burdens, and memories. She embraces the "Me-Too" movement. This is an emotional and thought-provoking memoir.

[Andrea Rothman · Rating 5 out of 5]

“The body speaks an arcane language. I must learn to translate.” This stunning sentence is at the root of Sue Silverman’s new memoir “How to Survive Death And Other Inconveniences.” Nebraska press.
A self-declared hypochondriac who is obsessed with death, she is intent on living her best life as much as she is in distilling the root of the issue—fear of death. This isn’t simple. Silverman’s past is fraught with incidents too painful to recall but recall she does, in technicolor images that shine on the page, and take the reader on a road trip style journey that moves back and forth through time, just like memory does: “But memory also preserves itself by rippling through time, reinventing itself,” writes Silverman. This re-invention of the self is latent and ever present on the page, and it makes for a dynamic and absorbing read. I particularly applaud the author for the unrelenting honesty with which intensely traumatic events are recalled and explored, and ultimately shared with the reader. Surviving death starts from an early age for Silverman: “To survive death, I must first survive my father,” and unfolds through time, touching with a rippling effect nearly every aspect of her life, including language.
“To survive death you have to believe in the magic of language,” Silverman writes, while remaining faithful to her claim. The language of the book is indeed magical, and so is its wisdom.

[Zoe L.]

Why is this book so relatable? I found myself both chuckling and mumbling “same” or “mood” throughout. I mean, who hasn’t googled some random medical symptoms and come to the conclusion that you are, in fact, dying. But also, I’ve always had a morbid sense of humor so I always find myself deflecting with my dark humor. And since this book had a similar sense of humor you know I was enjoying myself while reading.

I really enjoyed that this memoir was in the form of a handful of essays. I’ve always been a fan of anthologies of stories but it’s been a really long time since I’ve read one. I also think, given the subject matter, that the essays really worked in showing the progression of time and beliefs. Going from childhood through adulthood the essays show the progressions of Silverman’s interest to obsession with death. I also think that this is something that many of us have to deal with, facing death head-on as we get older.

Silverman writes with a sharp and clear style yet remains witty throughout, even given the rather morbid theme of the book. Which I think is perfect for right now, given our world climate at the moment. I mean, we all need a good laugh right now and what’s better to laugh at now than death?

You can view my full review on my blog! I also post about a lot of different types of books!

Reader | Bookstagrammer | Blogger | Reviewer
@ya.its.lit - https://www.instagram.com/ya.its.lit/
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[wellreadtraveler · Rating 4 out of 5]

How to Survive Death and Other Inconveniences is a quirky and unique book. What I thought the book was about changed from the beginning and several times throughout, right up to the very end. (In a good way of course) This book is written as a memoir with lots of self help and comedy thrown in. Author Sue William Silverman shares her debilitating fear of dying mixed in with many experiences where she felt that she was. Actually dying. #hypochondriac I am obsessed with a quote at the front of the book;
How is it possible, after all, that someone should simply vanish? How can someone who lived, loved, and wrangled with God and with himself just disappear? I don’t know how and in what sense but they’re here. Since time is an illusion, why shouldn’t everything remain?- Isaac Bashevis Williams
The book is written in essay form and in some ways I felt like I was reading her private diary entries. So open and honest Sue shares stories of survival and perseverance through sickness and health, loss of loved ones, addiction and the sheer will to survive death. I guarantee you’ve never read anything like this book and even though Sue touches on serious topics she does it in a graceful way that will have you smiling and at times laughing.

[Diana Raab · Rating 5 out of 5]

Memoir is not a new genre for Silverman, as this is her fourth, and I’ve read each book with fascination. This collection of connected essays shares scenarios from her other memoirs, but Silverman ingeniously adds more details and dimensions to those experiences. As a survivor of sexual abuse perpetrated by her diplomat father, becoming a sex addict, and having numerous marriages, she certainly has many compelling stories to share. She views each drama and tragedy as another death and waits for the next one to strike. “Often when I should feel happy I’m despondent, convinced tragedy waits to strike. Conversely I’m content, if not actually happy, in crisis—knowing things can’t get worse.”

Silverman is so talented at setting up scenes, and readers feel as if they’re in the same room with her. She’s a memoirist who’s not afraid to dig deep into her emotional truth. Silverman gives us much to ponder, and as a memoirist myself, I can relate to her sentiments about memories: “I torture myself with memories, I prefer bad memories to good ones. I prefer to remember pain more than pleasure. I carry such memories with me as if in a knapsack, a weight I’m unwilling to relinquish.” She asks how memory preserves itself, and she still continues to ponder the answer. Highly recommended.

[Glenda Bailey-Mershon · Rating 5 out of 5]

Unconventional, at times humorous, memoir that brings us inexorably to the center core of the author’s tendency toward promiscuity, drinking, risky behavior. We come to understand the author’s mental health issues in approximately the same sequence of events and insights as she does herself, and even when we can see it coming, the uncompromising truth and self deprecation of the narrator devastates us before allowing us to rebuild our own insights through her experience. Masterfully written. The structure of epigraphs containing definitions at the head of each chapter help us understand and foreshadow the coming insights. Other structural elements include the return to the same incidences with incremental understanding throughout the book, and elements such as the self deprecatory “Miss Route 17” and the classical references also help us reframe experiences as they accrue. Many sentences are wonders of description and/or construction. Many paragraphs hit emotional depths that challenge the reader. Each chapter leads us forward through a very frank narration that does not spare anyone. A master class in memoir writing.

[Sue · Rating 4 out of 5]

How do you survive death? Apparently through the memories and stories you leave behind. This memoir in essays, one of several by Silverman, is her attempt. It’s much heavier than I expected and a bit confusing because the essays travel around in time and place, forcing the reader to construct the chronology. Silverman introduces archaic words for her feelings and starts sections with strange testimony by the “Three Fates.” We learn that her father sexually abused her from a young age, that she was raped in her teens, that she developed unhealthy relationships to sex and food, and that she is a hypochondriac with a greater than normal fear of death. As a musician, I sympathize especially with the section on her learning to play piano. She started out playing by ear and wowing everyone with how well she played, but then her mother insisted she have formal lessons. Her teacher, bound to sheet music and tradition, pushed all the music out of her. So sad. This is a tough but fascinating book.

[Kelly · Rating 5 out of 5]

I originally thought this collection of essays was going to be a collection of essays, but it is so much more. It is a memoir in essay exploring a life through the lens of death, which is brilliant. We experience so many deaths in life; for example, the author was sexually abused from the age of four by her father: the first death, the death of self, of being. She is raped under a boardwalk as a teen, another death, and then has a miscarriage, also a death, which mirrored the death of her own inner child at the hands of predators. Her behavior mimics those deaths; the narrator dies over and over. The collection is framed in sections of the Three Fates, also brilliant, and lyric reflections on fate are woven throughout. This is a story of reaching for life in spite of death, in the face of the fear of death we all experience, of reaching for beauty and a Self buried by trauma and it’s told in such aching beauty, with a fierce but gentle voice and a strong dash of humor that not only alchemizes adversity but spins it into gold and is balm for the reader.

[Amy · Rating 5 out of 5]

How to Survive Death and Other Inconveniences may be one of the best book titles I've heard in a while. But getting into Sue William Silverman's head is what makes this book so fun and relatable. The author chooses a cool structure for the book by using the three fates - Clotho, Lachesis, and Atropos (if you've forgotten what each of the fates stands for, the book will reteach you - as it did me- with a little help from Google). Her neurosis about illness and death will certainly be relatable to many -in particular for those over 50, neurotic self included. Thankfully Sue takes readers through her worry about death and, yes, other inconveniences with humor and great insight.

[Megsbookclub · Rating 4 out of 5]

Today I’m sharing How to Survive Death and Other Inconveniences. I read this one awhile ago and highly recommend it if you are a fan of sharp writing and an essay format! The title might not be what you expect but Silverman writes about life! This is a memoir of the things that scare her and shape her. It’s about the things that have caused trauma and happiness. I was surprised how such a small book can have such a big impact. I normally would never say you can write in books but the way this is written you may want to grab a pen and underline quotes and sections to come back to. Be sure to add this one to your list!

[Alysia · Rating 5 out of 5]

How to Survive Death and Other Inconveniences is a wonderful essay collection that is decidedly playful despite its serious subject matter. Silverman's levity—"I want an organ specifically designed to monitor an existential crisis"—and attention to language—"I knew a boy born blue // a condition called cyanosis (from Greek, kyanos, meaning dark blue"—throughout the collection keeps the reader chuckling and engaged. Organized according to the three Fates, we move through the narrator's experiences and ruminations about the body, trauma, memory itself, and how ultimately language is what endures when life does not. An excellent read!

[Erin Khar · Rating 5 out of 5]

"Is death the inability to write a full sentence? In death can you write only a fragment? Is death one word searching in vain for a mate? A lost syllable? A misplaced letter? Is death an absence of key words or lost language?

If my body has a breakdown, am I left as only a footnote or erasure? A blank page?

I plan to never find out."

This book was an absolute pleasure to read. It's dark and funny and original. Silverman's voice, which is a force, is a master of metaphor. It's a memoir about survival, and that means so many things here.

[Stephani Beltran · Rating 4 out of 5]

How to survive death and other inconveniences By Sue William Silverman was an emotional rollercoaster filled with bravery, struggle, and recovery. It was a powerful memoir on Silverman’s young life and experiences that led her to be fearful of death. With a collection of essays that are recollections of events in her life that are so powerful and the writing being so honest and well written, it really grabbed at me and had me taking my time with each essay to full grasp and understand what had happened. Definitely add this one to your tbr.

[Terry · Rating 5 out of 5]

Charlie Chaplin once wrote "we must laugh in the face of our helplessness against the forces of nature - or go insane”

Well, Sue William Silverman writes her own version of this sentiment in her new book, How to Survive Death & Other Inconveniences, where she writes "If you're going to do something significant, then floods and plagues are part of the package."

A funny, poignant, memoir that begins on Route 17 in NJ, this book will help you to keep our current state of affairs and our short time in this world in perspective. Brava!

[Mandy Hazen · Rating 4 out of 5]

I connected with this book on so many levels. I am a huge hypochondriac and always think something is wrong with me and get frustrated when no one else believes me and or will listen to me. I feel alone, frustrated and unsupported. I connected with the author so much in this aspect. This book flowed to me like a book of short stories and the flow of relationships and the support or lack of support of things we can go through in life. Highly suggest.

[Danielle · Rating 5 out of 5]

I will be honest - the title of this book kind of threw me at first. I was expecting something morbid or depressing but this book was neither of those. This is a very poignant, honest and relatable memoir that examines the fear of death and the unknown from several different angles. This book was extremely well written, and I love the authors vulnerability in sharing her personal experiences so candidly.

[Joanne Nelson · Rating 5 out of 5]

Susan William Silverman loves words--what they mean, how they come about, and what they offer us. This love is evident in her latest memoir, How to Survive Death and Other Inconveniences, in which she explores her own fears and how they came about. Silverman's story is--like life--both humorous and heartbreaking. She brings the reader along as a friend on this exploration of her journey to investigate and avoid the end of life.

[Jody Keisner · Rating 5 out of 5]

"I think it’s safe to say that Sue William Silverman thinks about death more than you or I, or most everyone except for maybe the town coroner. Astonishingly, in How to Survive Death and Other Inconveniences (March 2020, University of Nebraska Press), she’s also hatched a plan to survive death." Read the rest of my review at https://www.hippocampusmagazine.com/2...

[Ellie · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved this collection of essays. Silverman tackles the idea of death in so many unique, creative and thought-provoking ways. I highly recommend anyone struggling with the idea of death or just curious about thinking about the topic pick this book up.