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354 pages, Kindle Edition
Published December 25, 2019











**“Don’t cry, baby.” I lean in and collect the salty liquid with my tongue. “There’s nothing to be sad about.” “I’m romanticizing you.” Her breath hitches and makes me smile. “I was looking for a prince, but I think I got, like, a Jafar or something. You’re tattooed and scary, you cuss and push me around all the time, but you also lift me up, and I like your moods anyway.”**
**“I want to try this with you,” she whispers. “But you should know I fell in love with you. Which is really dumb, and I know you don’t do that. You don’t do clingers or relationships or whatever. But maybe just give me this?” Her voice breaks with insecurity. “Just one time. Just play pretend. And then I can always know the man I gave myself to was special. At least I loved.”**
**“It’s gonna be okay. I trust you.” She fucking slays me. She trusts me when she’s never been given reason to do so. She gives me her most precious gift, and does it selflessly, in the name of love, when I haven’t even reciprocated her words.**
**“We were two puzzle pieces cut from the same mold. We must fit. The universe says so.” A tear slides over the side of her face and into the hair at her temple. “What if we don’t?” “What if we do?” I lean forward and follow the trail from her eye to her ear. “I love you too, Abigail. And I’ve never said that to a woman before.”**
**“I have never loved a woman before, so I might mess it up. But I don’t mess up loyalty. I don’t mess up protection or honesty. I don’t mess up the important stuff. I promise. You’re my girl now.”**
**“Spencer? Are you okay?” “Are you?” I pull back and stare into her eyes. The times I teased her about her size. About her ill-fitting clothes. When I touched her in the bathroom at Kane’s wedding, and again in her bathroom, when she did all she could to cover up. “Jesus, Abigail. Are you okay?” “It was a long time ago. I’m okay.” “I’m sorry for all the times I teased you.” “It’s okay.” Her lips quiver with a smile. “You’re basically the only person in the world that didn’t treat me like a fragile child. I fought you on it, but inside, I liked that you treated me like an adult.”**
**“You broke me. You walked into my world and fucked everything up.” “Crappy speech.” I chuckle. “I’m saying that no one has ever walked in and changed the very fabric of my being before. It doesn’t matter to me what your body looks like, because I’m already in love with it. I’m in love with your brain, your heart, the fact you visit sick kids most days, and the fact you took those expensive ass flowers to Jess and said they were from me. I’m in love with the fact you’re so honest and unfiltered about who you truly are.”**
**Maybe Abigail controls me too, and though I’m certain I should be grieving this new revelation, I can’t move past grieving for her. It’s been less than twenty-four hours, and I’m officially her slave. I’m her army, her protector, her hopeless addict, and ten minutes from now when I’m in my room and have privacy so the rest of the world isn’t witness to my emasculation, I’m going to call her and beg for a hit only she can give me.**
**When her cheeks flame, I take a moment to fall in love all over again. I was already there, already invested, already willing to lay my life down and declare this forever. But now it doesn’t seem so scary. It doesn’t seem so hard to give into what my body and mind already want.**
**“You’re mine. I’ve already demanded that, and won’t accept anything less. But I’m yours too, okay? All yours.” “What if you’re gone too long?” I frown. “What about it?” “You’ll want… ya know. You’ll want to be with a woman. With any woman.” “No, baby. You’re not replaceable. You’re not something I can replicate for convenience. If I say I’m yours, I mean that. I could be gone a week, a month, a year, it doesn’t matter how long I’m gone, I won’t accept a cheap version when I know I have you at home.” Her voice quivers as her eyes flicker between mine. “Promise?” “Cross my heart.”**
**From eternal bachelor, to eternally devoted to one, I’m staying, I’m sticking, and it’d take the damn jaws of life for her to get rid of me now.**
**“You know my sister, Serrano?” “She’s mine,” Spencer growls. “She’s my responsibility. My heart. My diagnosis and prognosis. My fucking war to fight, and my girl to protect.”**
**“I love everything about you. If you want babies, we’ll make it happen with science. If you want new, non-deadly boobs, I’ll buy them for you. If you want a purple wig to wear while undergoing treatment, I’ll buy you one in every shade. But I don’t care about your hair. I don’t care about your boobs. I don’t care about your ovaries.” He presses his hand to my heart. “This is the only thing I can’t live without. Your heart, baby. It’s what I fell in love with. It’s what I felt while I was away. It’s what has me coming back to you time and time again. The rest is just aesthetics.”**
**When Spencer looks at me the way all of those other husbands I remember swooning for look at their wives, there’s no way I couldn’t be confident. There’s no way I can doubt myself when he reminds me a hundred times a day why he loves me. I got my prince. And maybe he looks like a criminal, maybe his tattoos cost more than most homes, and maybe he cusses a lot. But he’s a prince, that’s for certain. He’s exactly who I was put on this planet for, and he was placed here for me.**
**We’re opposites in every way, and yet, we fit. Like two pieces of a puzzle that were made to be together. We’re perfectly imperfect, but in our imperfections, we’re perfect for each other.**