G-Strings and Sympathy: Strip Club Regulars and Male Desire

by Katherine Frank

Based on her experiences as a stripper in a city she calls Laurelton—a southeastern city renowned for its strip clubs—anthropologist Katherine Frank provides a fascinating insider’s account of the personal and cultural fantasies motivating male heterosexual strip club "regulars." Given that all of the clubs where she worked prohibited physical contact between the exotic dancers and their customers, in G-Strings and Sympathy Frank asks what—if not sex or even touching—the repeat customers were purchasing from the clubs and from the dancers. She finds that the clubs provide an intermediate space—not work, not home—where men can enjoyably experience their bodies and selves through conversation, fantasy, and ritualized voyeurism. At the same time, she shows how the dynamics of male pleasure and privilege in strip clubs are intertwined with ideas about what it means to be a man in contemporary America. Frank’s ethnography draws on her work as an exotic dancer in five clubs, as well as on her interviews with over thirty regular customers—middle-class men in their late-twenties to mid-fifties. Reflecting on the customers’ dual desires for intimacy and visibility, she explores their paradoxical longings for "authentic" interactions with the dancers, the ways these aspirations are expressed within the highly controlled and regulated strip clubs, and how they relate to beliefs and fantasies about social class and gender. She considers how regular visits to strip clubs are not necessarily antithetical to marriage or long-term heterosexual relationships, but are based on particular beliefs about marriage and monogamy that make these clubs desirable venues. Looking at the relative "classiness" of the clubs where she worked—ranging from the city’s most prestigious clubs to some of its dive bars—she reveals how the clubs are differentiated by reputations, dress codes, cover charges, locations, and clientele, and describes how these distinctions become meaningful and erotic for the customers. Interspersed throughout the book are three fictional interludes that provide an intimate look at Frank’s experiences as a stripper—from the outfits to the gestures, conversations, management, coworkers, and, of course, the customers. Focusing on the experiences of the male clients, rather than those of the female sex workers, G-Strings and Sympathy provides a nuanced, lively, and tantalizing account of the stigmatized world of strip clubs.

Genres: Anthropology, Nonfiction, Feminism, Sex Work, Sexuality, Sociology, Memoir

368 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2002

Reviews

[Henry · Rating 5 out of 5]

- In essence, the primary draw for many male to go to strip club comes fundementally down to their own inadequate growth in their mental maturity: that they know their primal needs, however, they do not have the mental capacity to align that with social norms and expectations. Strip club provides them a world where such norms and expectations were not expected of them, and they can be themselves.

- Perception and reality are often different: it's often wrong to assume why people do certain things without putting one in others' positions

- A big reason why people go to strip club is not sex whatsoever, but to relax. Many work in high stress arenas and crave an environment where regular societal rules wouldn't apply.

- On the other hand, many male crave strip club because they are inadequately prepared for the norm social interaction with women. Due to their communication/emotional/spiritual delinquency, they feel that their regular interaction with women are strained and "guilty" to even look at women even. Strip club provides them a world where such rules do not apply and they can be the delinquent self without penalty

- (People who go to strip clubs really need therapists. But of course, the out-dated-mantra of "real men don't cry" prevents male to do so since they need to "act tough" and the imagery of psychology help is for the week still vibrates around them)

- On the other hand, strip club could also be seen as a hobby like sports, stamp collecting or book reading

- To some, the allure of the strip club also has to do with their ability to content with their testosterone level, to engage in "fights" for the sole purpose of fights only

- For some, they actually also feel jealous of strippers whose body could be worshipped and loved by others (because them too, also would want to be sexualized at times)

- Fantasy: part of every human relationship - erotic ones especially - is the thrill of freshness of it and the fantasy that comes along with it. However, many of the strip club attendees have marital relationship that is stale and they seek to replicate the initial lust and thrill they had at the beginning of their own relationship (and in a strange way, the fact that no sexual activity could be conducted in a strip club comforts married men - because they know they won't get into trouble in their own moral standard because there are someone else who is safeguarding the moral code)

- Talking to beautiful women itself is a luxury for many men who otherwise couldn't get in their real world (ego boost)

- The ability to have intimate conversation is another big selling point: that many participants in the book argue that their relationships with other male are superficial, and they seek deeper conversations about lives that they can only get with other females (but they don't have other female friends)

[Larissa · Rating 4 out of 5]

For anyone who ever pondered about the power stuggles in a strip club, this one is for you. Being a feminist myself I found this very interesting. The book is written by a graduate student who is, as cliche as it sounds, working in the strip club for her college project uncover. She gives a detailed accounts and insight into the lives of strippers, regulars and the relationship aspect of the strip club. You'll never look at strip clubs the same.

[The Sapphic Nerd · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book investigates why some men regularly go to no-contact strip clubs. What are they really paying for if they aren't getting sexual release? How do these men see themselves, and how do they justify their being there when many are married/in committed monogamous relationships? It's fascinating, especially because the enthnographer did her fieldwork as a stripper, which gives us both perspectives. I really liked reading the anecdotes as well.

[Rachael · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is fascinating. Frank has decided to stop asking the question, "WHY do women strip?" and start asking the question, "WHY do men go?to strip clubs?"

[Lola Montgomery Marley · Rating 5 out of 5]

Right before the recent explosion of scholarship on burlesque was this. Highly recommended as a great example of a PhD thesis and for the thinking club stripper.

[Amanda Taylor · Rating 4 out of 5]

4.00/5.00