My Dreams Out in the Street

by Kim Addonizio

Rita Jackson is a young woman on the skids, spending her time in shelters and on the dot-com-drunk streets of late 1990s San Francisco. She's a young woman haunted by the murder of her mother when she was thirteen, and a young bride haunted by the disappearance of her husband, Jimmy, who split after a nasty argument more than a year earlier. Together Jimmy and Rita were slipping into drugs and hard times. Rita is filled with feelings of guilt and failure, and the hope that she will one day and Jimmy. She doesn't know that he is still in the city, still in love with her, waiting tables in an expensive restaurant while trying to get a foothold in the straight life.When Rita witnesses the aftermath of a murder, her own life is endangered. She becomes involved with Gary Shepard, a married criminal investigator drawn to the dark side of this young woman. What unfolds is a story of three flawed people struggling with themselves as much as with their circumstances, as each of them is pulled more deeply and dangerously into the consequences of their decisions. When a drunken night leads Jimmy to jeopardize his second and last chance, it seems unlikely that these sweet, damaged people will ever come to anything, let alone find and -- miracle of miracles -- save one another.

But fate, in Addonizio's hands, works in strange and beautiful geometries. And redemption, she tells us, is never impossible.

Genres: Fiction, Addiction, Novels, Romance

272 pages, Hardcover

First published January 1, 2007

About the author

Author of several poetry collections including Tell Me, a National Book Award Finalist. My Black Angel is a book of blues poems with woodcuts by Charles D. Jones, from SFA Press. The Palace of Illusions is a story collection from Counterpoint/Soft Skull. A New & Selected, Wild Nights, is out in the UK from Bloodaxe Books.

2016 publications: Mortal Trash, new poems, from W.W. Norton, awarded the Paterson Poetry Prize. A memoir, Bukowski in a Sundress: Confessions from a Writing Life, from Penguin.

Two instructional books on writing poetry: The Poet's Companion (with Dorianne Laux), and Ordinary Genius: A Guide for the Poet Within.

First novel, Little Beauties, was published by Simon & Schuster and chosen as "Best Book of the Month" by Book of the Month Club. My Dreams Out in the Street, second novel, released by Simon & Schuster in 2007.

A new word/music CD, "My Black Angel, "is a collaboration with several musicians and contains all the poems in the book of that name. That and an earlier word/music CD with poet Susan Browne, "Swearing, Smoking, Drinking, & Kissing," available from cdbaby.com. There's an earlier book of stories, In the Box Called Pleasure (FC2); and the anthology Dorothy Parker's Elbow: Tattoos on Writers, Writers on Tattoos,, co-edited with Cheryl Dumesnil.

I teach poetry workshops at conferences and online through my web site. I also play blues harmonica, and I'm learning jazz flute. Music is a good place to focus when I'm in a writing slump.

Reviews

[Nate D · Rating 3 out of 5]

The endorsement from Andre Dubus III made me a little worried that this story of life on the streets of gritty 90s San Francisco would feature that particular sort of emotionally manipulative "realist" tragedy and drama I'm particularly annoyed by, but no, Addonizio keeps an easy lo-key veracity. At its best when least plotted, in capturing the daily vicissitudes of the down and out, but the plotting is never too forced, and never tries to mess with the reader via implausible convergence. To be clear, I don't prioritize realism (clearly, from anything I read), I just dislike artifice designed purely to create drama with no other ends. Here. All the drama feels earned and necessarily a part of these lives. And when the long-awaited serendipitous convergence does occur, it's almost a joke about such devices: meaningless, and with no effect on the plot, like the million chance alignments that go nowhere in anyone's life.

[Brian Pappas · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is how it is, living out on the streets, alone and feeling as if the rest of the world doesn't even see you or acknowledge that you exist. A loneliness which buries deep within the soul and lingers there. Eventually not even drugs and alcohol can cloud it. Addonizio got it. Read this and you will too.

[AnnMarie · Rating 1 out of 5]

So I gave this book a try because I love her poetry. It was awful. I couldn't get through it.

[William Boyle · Rating 5 out of 5]

“But bad weather was always coming. You just had to ride it out.”

I wrote about how much I love Kim Addonizio’s 1997 book of poems JIMMY & RITA in a recommendation list I made for Soho recently (https://books.sohopress.com/saintofth...), and now I’m singing about MY DREAMS OUT IN THE STREET, her 2007 novel following the lives of the same characters on the same San Francisco streets in November ’97. I just finished rereading it, and I really think it’s one of my favorite novels ever, certainly one of my favorite novels of this century, and—as far as I can tell—it’s vastly underappreciated. The closest point of comparison is probably Willy Vlautin’s work—if you like Willy’s books (and songs), you’ll love this. Rita Jackson is cut from the same cloth as Allison Johnson in NORTHLINE and Lynette in THE NIGHT ALWAYS COMES. Jimmy D’Angelo would fit right in with Frank and Jerry Lee Flannigan from THE MOTEL LIFE. Addonizio writes beautifully about desperation, about broken people moving through a broken world, and about the traumas that shape us. Such a heartbreaking and profound book full of gorgeous language and unforgettable details.

[Lindsey Johnson West · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a harrowing book of love, addiction, loss, heart break and finding oneself again.

[Ian · Rating 4 out of 5]

A story of losers trying to survive. Problems problems problems, but written well enough that you want to keep reading to find the end results.

[Ryan Rougeux · Rating 4 out of 5]

My Dreams Out in the Street
By: Kim Addonizio
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
City: New York
Year: 2007

A novel of hurt, self loathing, addiction, and journey! Kim Addonizio creates a novel that brings out the feelings of helplessness, guilt, and hope into the reader. Her main character, Rita, is a homeless street dweller. She panhandles for money, sells herself to men, and only to make a couple bucks to live while staying high. She has lost her husband, Johnny, due to her heroine use, and is on a mission to find him again because he is the only man that she has loved. She embarks on a journey that most dwellers of life cannot even relate to. Rita has to deal with homelessness, a murder chasing after her, a private investigator whom cheats on his wife, and drugs on every corner. The novel is painstaking, and almost hurts to continue reading. The novel kept me on edge like I was fiending for her drug. You can’t stop reading to find out what happens to Rita, with a dark cloud following her, suspense builds. A very dark; human vs. world, fate, and self story.
The novel, written in many points of view, gives a character development drive. It starts out in Rita’s point of view, and as the story progresses other characters get involved, and their points of view come into play. The point of view change is indicated by an asterisks located after the paragraph finishes. If Rita was with one of the characters, it was usually written in her point of view. You get to know every feeling and side of each character involved. Rita loathes the fact that she is sleeping, and hanging with her P.I. Gary who keeps her safe. While Gary is thinking that they can be in love, and he can break away from his wife that he was not getting along with at the time. The story builds, and the conflict of characters grow remarkably.

The description of setting and image create intricate symbolism. The author describes San Fransico as foggy, and slightly gloomy. There is no sunshine and you get an eerie feeling from the get go. As the novel progresses, a storm comes through, and rain consists throughout the rest of the novel until the very end. She uses examples; birds chirping, and the sun shining, while clouds breaking away to show the resolution of the conflict. The author uses many distinct words to the way drugs make you feel. For example, Johnny was describing how cocaine made him feel; “This is why I never liked coke; it took you up for a few minutes like a wave, and then sent you straight to the bottom of the ocean” (78). A vivid image is built in your head, and Kim is a genius in her ability to portray that to the reader.
The tone of the novel is seemingly helpless in any action Rita makes. The reader builds a natural sense of pity for Rita, almost as if we are rooting for her to find her love Johnny, and her life to be easier. Throughout the novel, Rita never gets a break on life. She brings in religion, and how God should help her as she prays. Rita goes through flashbacks of getting raped by her stepfather, dialogue and instances of reusing heroine again with one of her old drug dealers.
A reoccurring symbol throughout is music. Every situation or scene incorporates a song that was on, or a song she was thinking of at the time. Almost like her life was lived through an IPod playlist. All famous musicians, Buddy Guy all the way to Sheryl Crow, “Everyday is a Winding Road.” A high recommendation to anyone wanting to see the “hell” of the world.

[Karen · Rating 5 out of 5]

I've loved Kim Addonizio's writing from the first book of hers I picked up, which was Jimmy and Rita. That book, told in poetry, related the tale of a young, down on their luck couple who live skating the edge of homelessness in San Fransisco. After that I devoured the stories in her collection, The Box Called Pleasure ---one a story about a young girl and her mother who have broken down at a gas station stays with me to this day. Both her poetry and her prose are magnigicent, so I was excited to see that the sequel to Jimmy and Rita came out in July of this year. I only got to it though about a month ago.

I expected the sequel to be a poetic narrative like the first book and was initially surprised/disappointed to find the book was prose. That disappointment faded as soon as I started reading. In fact, I think the sequel is superior to the first book. Despite the grim nature of the tale, I found I didn't want the story to end. I was entirely caught up in Jimmy and Rita's lives. The book begins with our young married couple split up. Rita doesn't know why her husband Jimmy never returned to their rooming house---she thinks he decided he didn't love her anymore. In truth, Jimmy has been arrested for taking part in a robbery gone wrong. Now out of jail, Jimmy is ashamed, not sure he deserves Rita or if she wants him back. And Rita's had to leave her hotel--the last place Jimmy knew where to find her---and is living sometimes at a shelter sometimes at an abusive friend's, but always on the street. Rita's life is dark---she prostitutes herself, she has a drug habit she's trying to lose, she endures a brutal kicking in the park, and worst of all she witnesses two men moving a dead body in one of the flop hotels where she stays for a few nights. Chillingly, the murderer sees Rita too. "You're dead," he whispers to her while she cowers behind a locked bathroom door. The man goes away, but Rita feels his words are a pronouncement--that he will find her and kill her. In contrast, Jimmy has found himself a job as a waiter. His life is finally starting to look up, and he when he sees Rita from a bus window one afternoon, he kicks himelf for not getting out and going to her. He's still ashamed of himself, but slowly he begins to entertain the idea of finding his wife again. Then a drunken night with a couple of friends and some girls from a bar threatens to pitch Jimmy's life back in the toilet, when one of the girls accuses him---unfairly---of rape. In the meantime, a man who has become entranced with Rita and offers to help her out of the mess her life has become, watches his own marriage disintegrate while his desire for Rita takes on an obsessive bent. Is he a possibility for hope in Rita's life, or just another bad episode waiting to happen?

This novel was so good. Many times heartbreaking, reading this put me on edge, wanting the best to happen for the characters with whom I'd quickly made a big emotional investment, worried that nothing could ever turn around for them again, and terrified that the murderer would catch up to Rita. But most of all--- I wondered and worried, would Jimmy and Rita ever find their way back to one another? This novel is gritty, often harsh, often lovely, and just damn good. Reading Jimmy and Rita is not at all neccesary to dive into this book. Each stands alone, and like I said, I like this one best.

[Kristin Soto]

My Dreams Out in the Street
Kim Addonizio
Simon & Schuster
New York, 2007

Streets of Hope

Kim Addonizio’s, “ My Dreams Out in the Street,” is a written journey of the quest for redeeming oneself and the inspiring idea that hope is still a concept to be revered. The novel’s protagonist, Rita, is a young woman trying to survive the streets of San Francisco while searching for her husband, Jimmy, who had left her a year ago. Jumping from shelter to shelter, selling her body for money and battling a drug addiction, it almost seems impossible for Rita to come out of her situation a changed person reunited with her long lost loved. Little does she know, Jimmy is still residing in the city and very much in love with Rita. However, he too is battling with his own demons as he sets out to change his life around for the better. Rita is also conflicted when she finds herself as a witness to an investigation headed by the novel’s third main character, Private Investigator Gary Shepard. Gary and Rita begin working closely together and eventually become involved, creating yet another obstacle standing in the way of Rita’s dreams: to be free of the streets and reunited with Jimmy once again.

As Addonizio molds Rita in the story, the reader can sense the despair, embarrassment and fear Rita has internally. Depicting scenes of hardships Rita has endured adds to the complexity of her character and gives the reader more insight as to where she comes from, how she got to her current position, and why she is the way she is. Though the novel reads mainly in Rita’s point of view, it also incorporates the views of the other primary characters as well. This creates a better understanding for the purpose of the reader. Both the characters’ dialogues and subconscious thoughts create a more vivid description of the scenes and inner workings of the people involved.

Though “My Dreams Out in the Streets” incorporates effective use of imagery and creates believable characters, the novel itself is a bit formulaic and almost too predictable. The novel is sectioned off into pieces that tell the story of each character and the climax does not really arise until the last chapter, which may lose the reader’s interest rather quickly. As the novel concludes, it almost seemed as though Addonizio tried to rush each character’s plot just to tie them in together for a plausible ending. As a reader, it left me more confused and wanting more; it just seemed too coincidental and interrupted the flow of the piece.

However, Addonizio does attempt to raise the notion that hope still exists and to never give up on something that you hold so close to your heart. Even in the darkest times where all seems lost and there is no way of freeing oneself from physical and emotional depravity, the characters in “My Dreams Out in the Streets,” somehow find the light to guide them to freedom. The novel is about never losing sight of your dreams, which Addonizio successfully accomplishes.

[shadesofwords · Rating 2 out of 5]

have been staring at the screen for the last fifteen minutes trying to find words to describe my reaction to ‘My Dreams Out In the Street’. Well, that for sure indicates that it was a good book. But did I like it? I think I am going to sit on the fence for this one.
First the plot. Rita Jackson is a 23 year old addict. She is addicted to drugs, alcohol and smoking. She is homeless. She is married but does not know where her husband is. She freelances as a prostitute when she is pennliess. And she has seen a man disposing of a dead body – someone he might have killed. And he knows that she has seen him.
100 pages and I already gasping for air with the hopelessness of it all.”My Dreams out..” literally pulls you by your collar , from you bed into Rita’s messy world. There were moments when I had to put the book away, walk around the house to steady myself as waves of nausea hit me. My biggest challenge was my difficulty to relate to this protagonist. Even when I tried to push my boundaries and try to imagine this world and this character, something would happen that would seem so unreal and shake me. For instance, Rita having vodka for breakfast, daily. Then for lunch and then for dinner. Rita losing all her belongings once, twice and then again.
This books its not just about Rita. Its also about Gary Shepherd , a private investigater , who works in the hell holes of San Francisco trying to find justice for people just like Rita. As he walks in to a chapter, you breathe a sigh of relief. He is instantly drawn to her and provides some emotional and financial support to this deeply disturbed yet earnest woman. Once he discovers that Rita has witnessed the very murder he is investigating , he promises to protect her. Even if it means sleeping with her and cheating on his wife. A 21st century fairy god mother!!
But there is redemption for him and for her. Nothing dramatic. Maybe because this isn’t a fairytale as much as its about real people.
The writing is choppy , very new age. Sentences in your face. There is no escape in decorative literary mouldings. As I read I felt I was walking in those god forsaken alleys of San Francisco , whether I liked it or not.

[Karla Huebner]

I took this home from the library because I recognized the author's name (although I cannot remember whether we've published in the same journals or what it is that makes her name familiar) and because I rather liked the idea of a novel about street people in San Francisco. The characters were well drawn, and the milieu was certainly recognizable, but I was a bit disappointed. Considering that Addonizio is an award-winning poet, the diction is awfully flat and even clunky. If this had been written in first person (using Rita), the diction would work--it seems like her voice. However, it's not in first person, nor are we always following Rita, so there's not much reason to use a narrative voice that suits a high school dropout who only knows one form of past tense. My other complaint is that the story includes a murder mystery, yet while Rita ultimately escapes the murderer (rather by deus ex machina--why do the police show up so conveniently?) and his capture means that we should be able to learn why he killed the red-haired prostitute, Addonizio is not about to give us the satisfaction of wrapping up that bit of plot. I suppose that would... ahem... smack too much of genre fiction. But if we're to have slice-of-life realism, then why is there the promise of a happy ending in which Rita is reunited with her husband, whose assault charge is so conveniently dropped and whose employer is so willing to keep him despite his arrest? And why, for heaven's sake, is it necessary to make the murderer's accomplice turn out to be Rita's husband's pal Stan? If we knew more about the murder, we might buy Stan the sleazy jeweler as a murderer's accomplice, but as things are? Give me a break. So... this is an easy-to-read novel with rather appealing characters but it has some irritating flaws.

[Kenia · Rating 4 out of 5]

In the book My Dreams out in the Street by Kim Addonizio the author is trying to emphasize the theme of “desperation” . Kim Addonizio tries to get us to understand what Rita Louise Jackson and her lost husband Jimmy are going through , she shows this by writing their thoughts and dreams. The events in the book reveal that the author’s world is viewed in a big city full of violence, drugs and problems. The way the other wrote the book made me realize how some people have it bad in the world, that my problems aren’t as big as others. I tried to put myself into Rita’s shoes, living on the streets, prostituting so she could eat and not having any friends or family she can trust , it definitely made me understand why my parents say that my life could be worse and to take things for granted . It also made me think about the people who don’t have anything , just the clothes on their back and a backpack that I see everyday but don’t do anything to help them and I thought of myself as a selfish person. I recommend reading this book, I bought it from a bookstore because I liked the cover but the inside was better. It might sound strange when you start reading but you won’t be able to put it down, it's a easy and fun book to read. The character Rita is an honest , funny and smart person and when you read this book you’ll be thankful for what you have in your life .

[Tiffany Conner · Rating 2 out of 5]

I wish you could give half of stars. I would give this book 1.5. I wanted so much to like this book. I mean, the author is from Oakland (Big Ups to O-town!!!), she's tatooed, and appears on back cover with a beer in her hand. I dig that kind of shit. Plus, I really love the title. Be that as it may, I was not so taken with what I found between the covers. It was akin to assuming that someone with all of the external goods was going to be raucous in the sack after they had spent half the night sucking on your earlobe, only to end up naked in their bed and have them tell you they aren't in the mood. Or maybe I'm thinking of something else?

I wanted this book to be a good storytelling lay. It wasn't. The characters left me wanting for so much more. The potential for a complex, enticing story was there. But I don't know that Addonizio has the writing chops for it. The denouement was so predictable as to be forgettable. Addonizzio is a poet who took a respectable stab at a novel, but it doesn't feel like this is her genre. I'd like to think that I would find her poetry much more worth reading.

[Dusty · Rating 3 out of 5]

beware of a novel whose author's publicity photo pictures them holding a bottle of beer. yes everyone drinks in this novel. a lot. it reminds me of that "i am a gritty bad ass" bay area attitude i got really sick of back in the 90's, which is when and where the novel takes place. rita lives on the street, half the time trying to scape together money for a hotel room. the book is hard to put down, you want rita to make it, you want rita to get her shit together. rita was a little hard to swallow because her character was stupid in a way i didn't think was realistic. a person like that wouldn't last on the streets longer than three months, tops. this is some kind of cinderella/pretty woman bullshit but maybe the fairytale aspect is what makes her story palatable. why can't someone write a real story about a woman on the street who gets her life together
without some man at the end of the rainbow?

[Meen · Rating 3 out of 5]

12/27/10: This was nice, but I like the poem better. Is it horrible of me that I was rooting for Rita to be killed? I think I should mention that to my therapist...

:)

10/21/10: Oh man, I'm afraid to read this b/c I loved the poem these characters are from (Jimmy & Rita), and I don't want to have a different vision of them from what I have now. But this on the $1 cart at The Strand, so you know I had to get it.

[Gato Negro · Rating 1 out of 5]

Well, I picked this up because the cover art looked enticing on the library's shelf, and I dig addiction memoir(s), but the book is a complete drag...I made it as far as page 71 (out of 256 pp) and I am returning it with the rest unread. I could not care less about what happens to the lead character (the author does very little to establish empathy, there are just stark facts and spare details about her junkie life) and once you fail to establish a connection with the characters of a book, pretty much all is lost. I have too many books on my reading list to waste any more time on this one.

[Allison · Rating 4 out of 5]

This novel was very much like Addonizio's poetry - full of the underbelly of humanity (but definitely the humanity part) and poetic language. Even the ending felt elliptical for me. Good read. I found myself thinking about it even when I wasn't reading it. And I like that she picked up Jimmy and Rita from her poetry collection aptly called Jimmy and Rita. These are two characters who hold on tight and you just can't let go of.

[Jennifer · Rating 3 out of 5]

Not a pleasant story, but what seems to me an honest tale about living on the streets with addictions. As a reader you want Rita to find a happy ending, but living in reality means this will be so difficult... Heroin and crack play such a huge role in the crime scene lately, when I read this book it at least gives me a glimpse of what some of the addicts live through on a daily basis.

Not a warm and fuzzy, feel good story, but gripping nevertheless.

[Carrie · Rating 4 out of 5]

I'm not really sure how I feel about Addonizio reprising her characters from the book of poetry Jimmy and Rita (which I loved), but the book is a deft look at these characters and the difficulties of getting by. It's definitely better than her last novel.

[jen · Rating 3 out of 5]

The characters in this book all operate a few steps from death at almost all times. It was pretty bleak but also with some hopeful moments. I enjoyed reading it although it was a major shift from the bunch of YA novels I read. I would recommend the book.

[Joan Colby · Rating 4 out of 5]

Interesting, very well written story of a couple of street people types--Rita and Jimmy and their struggles maintaining a peripheral existence in San Francisco. Addonizio is also a well-regarded poet.

[Deanna · Rating 4 out of 5]

A great read! Enjoyed it very much... all but the end. Would've liked a little more info, some closure on the story.

[Jessica Martines · Rating 3 out of 5]

The author definitely knows SF. I could see Miz Browns in the background of my long ago memories and smell the fog at Ocean Beach. Fun read if you like books set in SF.

[Susannah · Rating 2 out of 5]

Takes place in SF, homeless drug-addicted young girl on the streets. Too formulaic.

[Chelsea Otakan · Rating 2 out of 5]

Better as a book of poetry from what I understand. Found the murder mystery to be a rather dull and badly integrated plot device. Strong characters, if not always likable characters.

[Heidikris · Rating 2 out of 5]

To formulaic....and expected. Homeless girl in San Fran, prostitute, drugs, loses her man......blah blah blah. Don't bother.

[Caryn · Rating 4 out of 5]

Good writing, gritty subject, sympathy for the devils

[Misti Rainwater-Lites · Rating 3 out of 5]

one star for being set in San Francisco
two stars for the hot sex scenes

[Katie · Rating 4 out of 5]

I especially like that parts are written in Reno. Kim Addonizio is great!

[Nancy · Rating 3 out of 5]

A sweet book and interesting. But, I like Kim's poetry more.