When Less Becomes More: Making Space for Slow, Simple, and Good

by Emily Ley

Women today are more fatigued, burned out, and overwhelmed than ever. You may feel like your life is frantic––that you're running on empty. In When Less Becomes More , you'll learn how to live a life of more in a world that often overwhelms to the point of burnout. Smartphones constantly ping and alert and demand your attention. And social media can eat up hours of your days with mindless scrolling and tapping while leaving you feeling empty and lonely. Add to that family commitments, work that is accessible around the clock, and overscheduling, and you have a life that can feel out of control. In When Less Becomes More , Emily Ley, author of the bestselling Grace, Not Perfection and Growing Boldly , takes you on a journey out of that empty place and shows you how to fill your wells with the nourishment that only true connection can provide. She also presents some radical concepts that push against the tethers of modern life, with the promise that more of the good stuff comes when we say yes to less of what keeps us Getting to more might require some outside-the-box changes, some unraveling of the patterns you have adopted, and some reworking of the day to day. Build a life based on your core values instead of slipping into a life dictated by society or what's "normal." Because you weren't made for normal. You were made for more––for a life of fullness, dreaming, and lasting joy.

Genres: Nonfiction, Self Help, Audiobook, Personal Development, Christian, Parenting, Adult

224 pages, Hardcover

First published November 12, 2019

About the author

Emily Ley is the founder of Simplified® - a brand of planners and organizational tools for busy women. Emily has been featured in Forbes, Family Circle, Better Homes and Gardens, Glamour, and Good Housekeeping. She has been recognized with numerous awards, including Best New Product at the National Stationery Show as well as Top 10 Designers to Watch by Stationery Trends Magazine. Emily and her team recently collaborated with AT-A-GLANCE® to create gift and planning collections carried in Office Depot, Staples, and Target. Emily is the author of national bestselling books, Grace, Not perfection: Embracing Simplicity, Celebrating Joy and A Simplified Life: Tactical Tools for Intentional Living. Now as an author, entrepreneur, wife and mother to three, Emily lives in Pensacola, Florida with her husband, Bryan, and their son Brady (8), and twins Tyler and Caroline (4).

Reviews

[Christy · Rating 3 out of 5]

3 stars

“Choose gratitude and grace every morning. Grace and gratitude go hand in hand.”

This was my first non-fiction book of the year, and though I enjoyed it for the most part, there was nothing truly new or revolutionary about it. This book focuses on the less, not from a minimalist pov, but more about less spending time with screens, on social media, etc. It encourages you to take a look at how you spend your time and if you could make any changes to make your life better.

While there were parts of this book I enjoyed, it didn’t have many real practical tips for me, and I feel like it was geared towards people with children, which I don’t have. Also, it’s got a lot of Christian/religious parts, which I was fine with but I know some people don’t want that in their non-fiction/self help type books. I feel like that’s not mentioned on the cover or blurb so just a heads up for any potential readers. Overall, this was just okay for me.

[Sara Budarz · Rating 2 out of 5]

I am someone who loves reading books on simplifying life, and so when I came across this book, I decided to give it a read. And here's the thing: there is nothing wrong with the advice in this book, it is just that, well, the advice is so self-evident.
An example: turn off the loud chiming noise caused by notifications on your phone from Instagram and FB. Who didn't do this right the moment that they downloaded the app? Do people really have social media pop up all day long? I am confused.
Or the author continues to complain about the "noise of everyday life." But in reading on, you realize this is noise she has chosen to accept as normal: having a TV on in the background all the time, having phones beeping, having kids play on tablets. I read this and kept thinking: why in the world do you have a TV, and even if you do, why would you let it just be on in the background? OF COURSE you are going crazy in this environment. Anyone would. But most would have already turned off the TV and taken it to Goodwill. Or at least, anyone who is an expert of slow living. Telling readers to turn off the TV does not count as a new idea in 2019.

Or this: only check email three times a day and schedule distraction-free time to work between these email-checking sessions. Again: this feels like common knowledge and the way absolutely everyone works these days, at least among all of the colleagues I have.

The author also mentions realizing she spent about five hours a day on social media and talks about it as if this is what everyone struggles with. And I was more thinking: isn't that already at the level of addiction? Who does this?

But for those people who do struggle with not being able to put down their phone and work, then sure, read this book.

But one last caveat: as a scholar who focuses on women in the 1920s and 1930s, well, my alarm bells go off anytime someone starts waxing poetically about how much easier and calmer and happier women were back then. They were not. Our grandmothers were not less stressed, our mothers weren't happier, the world was not a safer or better place. Every measurable metric, from crime to health, has improved since then. So why do authors love to write about how slow and lovely life was back then? This author specifically chooses one hundred years ago, which would put her fantasy woman in 1919: at the end of a world war, a year before she wins her fight for the right to vote in the US, a time in which she had very few rights, a world in which birth control was highly unreliable, a world in which she was legally allowed to be beaten, a world in which if she is a woman of color she has almost no rights, a world in which heating a home was still hard, in which laundry took hours, in which health care treated the female body with disrespect. But this is the life we should strive to emulate? The good old days where women were happy. Sigh. Can we please stop this nonsense?

I am all for the idea of finding a pace of life that works for each of us. I am just not sure this book will help anyone find this.

[book bruin · Rating 3 out of 5]

Audiobook Review

Overall 3 stars
Performance 5 stars
Story 2.5 stars

This was a quick and easy listen. There isn't anything revolutionary or ground breaking in the message, but it was still a nice reminder to slow down and reconnect with what is most important in your life. I enjoyed the author's narration and the dedication/letter to her daughter was very sweet and heartfelt. I personally did not care for the faith chapter (I skipped it) and religious overtones, but I think the message of choosing to be still in this frantic and hurried world is valuable. The book will certainly resonate with many people.

*I voluntarily reviewed an advance listening copy of this book. Many thanks to Libro.fm and Thomas Nelson*

[Lorilin · Rating 4 out of 5]

The advice in this book can essentially be boiled down to this: slow down and be your most authentic self. The message isn't revolutionary, but I still enjoyed reading the book. I liked author Emily Ley's advice to unpack and evaluate your commitments, then keep only the obligations that are completely necessary or that spark joy. Even just the simple acknowledgment that "our lives were not meant to include so much" felt comforting to me.

Just an FYI, Ley does come from a Christian perspective. There's even an entire chapter on being a more godly woman (which I skipped), so be aware.

I enjoyed this book overall. It's helping me decide which commitments I want to keep in my life and which ones I'm ready to cut loose. It also made me pause to consider what "enough" looks like for me. Definitely food for thought.

Thank you to Amazon Vine and Thomas Nelson for the ARC!

See more of my book reviews at www.bugbugbooks.com!

[Romie · Rating 4 out of 5]

this is a book I completely picked up at random. I liked the cover. I liked that it was narrated by its own author, and I have to admit, I love non fiction. also I’ve been feeling very anxious lately, even overwhelmed, and this book seemed just what I needed.
I had such a good time listening to it. the author’s voice is incredibly soothing, it helped me relax. I had no idea that it was Christian non fiction, and as someone who is Jewish I was ‘scared’ that I wouldn’t be able to relate to the elements of faith. but I did. faith has always been an important part of my life, and although the last few years have been a bit bumpy, I’m still someone who deeply believes. and it was nice to listen to someone I have next to nothing in common with, telling me things about her faith and her struggles that I could relate to. it reminded me how much I need to be present in the moment, in my own life.

thank you libro.fm and thomas nelson for the audio listening copy

[Kazen · Rating 2 out of 5]

I went into this book buoyed by the jacket copy - while it's from a Christian publisher there's no whiff of God on the back, and it seems like a delightful collection of tips for everyone. Once you start reading, though, it's clear that Ley is aiming her message at people much like her - women with children who are managing busy households. The further away you are from her instagram-worthy life the less you will get from the book.

Check out my full thoughts in a 2 for 1 review I did on youtube, pairing When Less Becomes More with How to Do Nothing by Jenny Odell: https://youtu.be/ntDp9G7OQ90

Thanks to Thomas Nelson and libro.fm for providing an audiobook copy for review.

[Erica · Rating 2 out of 5]

Less practical, More privilege- Emily Ley writes about taking time to be on social media less, create less noise, yell less, and basically be present more, buy less stuff and create more treasures - all while acknowledging that she has the financial means to do so and not everyone has the means for food on their table or a roof over their head. The whole thing read like a scolding from a really nice aunt, if you have clutter - fix it, obviously! There was no steps or practical guidance to how to actually achieve these things, but lots of anecdotal examples from her own blessed life. I skipped the whole chapter on faith, so maybe that one was different but most likely not. I love the Simplified brand, and I was hoping this book would be more of a how-to-achieve a simplified life, but it just made me feel judged for everything I currently do to survive as a mom to 3 (who at one point were 4 and under - it’s not that uncommon that she needed to mention it MULTIPLE times throughout the book), things that I didn’t feel bad about before, but now I do. So. Thanks?

[Taylor · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book came at the exact time I needed it.

As part of Emily’s launch team I received an early copy, and I am so so glad.

Emily shares her own journey as she talks to us as women about embracing the slow, good life instead of the rushed, overwhelming one. She digs deep into different areas like technology, family, home and faith.

Everything she said in this book deeply touched my heart. It made me step back and really think about what the “good life” looks like for me and my family. Already I’m making changes to embrace the good. I’m letting go of things and even though I’ve only just begun this journey I can already tell that less really is more!

Everyone should read this book!! One of my favorites this year ❤️

[Alicia · Rating 1 out of 5]

I couldn't tolerate the tone of the book nor the pretty pictures and layout.

I thought it would dive into and or inspire more action but instead it seemed to be a biography of her busy life and how she's trying to manage and slow down, giving advice as a wizened woman of God. Not that there's anything wrong with that because it will speak to a lot of people, I'm just not that person.

[Rebekah · Rating 4 out of 5]

I enjoyed reading this book as it was a good one to read in the beginning of the year. As things pile into our schedule and onto my to-do list, I definitely want to evaluate if they're really necessary. This is probably not my favorite book of Emily Ley's... But I still appreciated the reminders to simplify my life and schedule, our possessions, my child's toys and especially, to make time for rest and the things that truly matter!

[Camille Maio · Rating 5 out of 5]

I found this book near the register at the Draper James flagship store in Nashville. I was just about to make my purchase when this caught my eye, and I bought it on impulse. I’m so glad I did! Full of honesty, gentle suggestions, faith, inspiration artwork, and prompts, it stands out among many books featuring the topic of simplification. I have already ordered her next one.

[Melissa Green · Rating 5 out of 5]

“Choose gratitude and grace every morning. Grace and gratitude go hand in hand.”

In When Less Becomes More, Emily goes through ten areas of life that have become overwhelming. She explores what it means to slow down and refuel instead of continuing the burn out cycle. She takes readers through a journey of what it might look like to choose less and have it mean more.

This is Emily Ley’s third book, and I must say that this is the best one yet. In our society that consistently tells us to hustle, work more, buy more, and never slow down, Emily Ley brings a breath of fresh air on what it would look like to slow down and savor. I enjoyed this book immensely. I felt like I was talking with a friend while I read this book. Emily shared thoughts that I have felt ever since finishing graduate school and a pharmacy residency. It was nice hearing that Emily also is looking for a slower pace to savor life’s big and small moments and that she hasn’t set her goals aside just because she is going against what society tells us we much do or be to look successful. Throughout the book she consistently allows readers to pause and think about what less would look like in their lives. While at times I did think this book leaned towards new mothers, I think the message is relevant for anyone feeling burnout in today’s fast paced society.

[Donna · Rating 2 out of 5]

This is Nonfiction and it read more like a memoir than anything else. I'm not the target audience for this one. While the title sounded like something attractive, I'm not plagued with the issues that the author was plagued with.

I wrote a long review for this, but it sounded kind of mean when it certainly wasn't meant that way. If this was fiction, I would have posted my original review, but with nonfiction, I try to not to be too negative when people put a piece of themselves out there.

I just didn't connect to this book or the author for more than a few reasons. I get there are people who need to start here, and I hope they find what they are looking for, but for me it felt fluffy and superficial (and I need to stop there)....like a blog complete with snapshots of life. So 2 stars.

[Basic B's Guide · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a beautiful and meaningful reminder of how we get more out of life by doing and wanting less. Faithful mamas I highly recommend listening to this one. The opening and closing had me in tears.

How present are you in your daily life? Do you disconnect regularly? Do you schedule time away from your phone and computer?

This is something I struggle with and I’m trying to do better. I admit I’m dopamine addicted and CANNOT stop checking my email and notifications. Laugh all you want, but I know I’m not alone. My friend Lyndsey @lyndseydrawsitagain and I both happened to be listening to this last week and I was so grateful to have her as a sounding board for my own insecurities. I’m a work in progress. I want to be more present with my children, husband and friends. I can do this and I will make changes. One of the great tips that Ley and a few others have mentioned is batch scheduling. Batch scheduling allows us to no longer be a slave to those notifications. Say we schedule 3 times a day for checking notifications we can free ourselves of wasted time. I can’t say its going perfectly but I have noticed a difference. I also now set downtime on my phone and I find myself doing things I SHOULD be doing instead of mindlessly scrolling Instagram.

Ley narrates the audiobook and I highly recommend it, especially for Mommas that are struggling. I’ve never really thought of myself as a big #selfhelp reader but lately they’ve been speaking to me. I don’t know if its just the timing or if it’s the message that I’m needing to hear. Either way I’m grateful I made myself and my family a priority by listening to this one.

[Cara Putman · Rating 4 out of 5]

A calm and sweet call back to the things that matter. An exploration of whether the way we live our lives is really great. The book itself is a nice one to give as gifts -- while the audiobook is like sitting down with your friend at a favorite coffeeshop and talking about the issues that impact women in today's world. Social Media, parenting, the race for more. I recommend this book for those who are looking for ways and reasons to reset the crazy from their lives

[Courtney Kramer · Rating 2 out of 5]

I was not a fan of this book. I loved “A Simplified Life”, but “When Less Becomes More” came off as very humble brag-gy and didn’t offer any actual steps to creating a “life of less.”

I agree with Ley’s assessments that we need more rest time, quality time with family, etc, and less “stuff”, but she was not at all relatable in this book. I am a working mom of 2 boys and I got very little out of this book.

[Stephanie Sexton · Rating 4 out of 5]

If you’re feeling overwhelmed with life’s responsibilities with work, family, and society in general, then this is the book for you. Emily Ley shares practical tips for simplifying your life, especially in regards to social media and technology. I found myself reflecting on how I actually spend my time. This is also a quick read, exemplifying her philosophy that less is truly more.

[Lindsey · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book is mostly just a memoir of her life. Which is fine, but there weren’t very many lessons. And I do/knew it all already anyway. Pass.

[Carrie Brownell · Rating 5 out of 5]

I listened to this one on Audible for a book club read. I really liked it. I found it gave me a lot of good food for thought in how to slow down and build up the life I'd like to have (i.e., a calmer one with less everything). I'm really glad to have read this one at the start of 2020 because it allows me to build goals for this year.

If you need someone to come alongside you and question your busyness and sanity, this author is willing to do so in a spirit of camaraderie. Also if you need someone to point out why social media is a possible blight upon humanity, this book helps build the argument. ;)

[Carissa-Lynn · Rating 4 out of 5]

I will say I very much enjoyed this with the disclaimer that I am very much it's target audience 😁
I appreciated a lot of what the author said and enjoyed the writing. I could have done without so many pictures from her family photoshoot but, you win some you lose some.

[Fanna]

i really need this during this end-of-the-year chaos. super grateful to libroFM's ALC program, i got an audiobook for review purposes!

[Nana · Rating 5 out of 5]

Satisfy us in the morning with your unfailing love, that we may sing for joy and be glad all our days

[Jordan Wagner · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book couldn’t come at a more perfect time in my life. After experiencing intense and overwhelming burnout at the end of last year, I slowly find myself finally digging out of the endless hole of balancing my work life, personal life, social calendar, relationship, a family death, a wedding, and my own business - all while at a crossroads in my life and making some huge long-term decisions. This book was just what I needed to slow down and savor the small moments in life. Emily narrated the book and it was amazing. At a little over 3 hours, it was the perfect way to start a Friday morning!

[Sassy Sarah Reads · Rating 2 out of 5]

2 stars. I didn't hate this, but I walked away from the listening experience feeling pretty mediocre about it. Review to come.

[Kristina · Rating 5 out of 5]

A beautiful book with a great message. Some of the pages are pretty enough to frame, and there are work pages to flesh out your thoughts.

[Candy · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is really good at making you look at what’s really important. Having a simpler and more intentional life really is something I would like more of.

[Jenny · Rating 1 out of 5]

This book was ultimately really disappointing for me. I read "Grace, not Perfection" a few years ago and really enjoyed it. I was new to motherhood and very overwhelmed and I felt that the book was just what I needed at the time. Fast forward a few years and now I'm a working mom with two kids and I hoped this book would provide the same to me in this time of life that feels particularly chaotic.

Overall, the messaging of the book was fine. Slow down - focus on quality, not quantity - limit the use of technology - don't succumb to pressures around us to 'keep up' and compare ourselves. Nothing earth-shattering that I hadn't heard before.

But what *really* bothered me about this book was the level of privilege Emily exhibited, but didn't seem self-aware enough to recognize herself. The chapter on "financial freedom" was particular frustrating for me to read. After going through the Dave Ramsey program and paying off debts, Emily was very honest that her and her husband had reached a point where they had a lot of money (or so she alluded). She admitted to buying books of Amazon instead of taking her kids to the library; utilizing meal services to make meal-planning easier, etc. There is nothing wrong with these things, but the way it was written, I genuinely wonder if Emily realizes that these are not things that a lot of people can afford. So while she likes to put them on the pedestal of "slowing down" - does she realize this is a reality for most people?? Most people cannot buy whatever they want at a moment's notice. And if you DO have that kind of money, why was there no discussion of giving or helping out others around you who are less fortunate. She mentioned several times that money doesn't buy happiness - and it doesn't. But GIVING, doing for others, volunteering your time/money/resources DOES bring tremendous joy and contentment. Not to mention teaching your kids amazing lessons on how to treat others. Why was there no mention of this? Why not donate a bunch of those Amazon books to a charity that needs them more, or give some of those excess toys away to a local hospital? Emily may very well be doing these things, but they were never mentioned me. Again, to me this was a huge sign of her privilege and general lack of self-awareness. I couldn't relate to her at all.

[Lindsay · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book has such an important message for women today. For most of the book, I sat there thinking, "Yes! Exactly!" Emily Ley is able to beautifully put into words how so many people are feeling. It is so relatable and comforting to know that we're not alone with these feelings of burnout and overwhelm. I have read some motivational books lately that have the message of, "You can do it! Set high goals! Don't give up!" which are not bad messages by any means, but can make me feel like I need to do more or be more or achieve more. And like the title of this book says, sometimes less is more. I highly recommend this book!

[Andrea Engfer · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is Emily Ley’s best yet! I love all of her books, but this one touched on so many relatable life topics that left me feeling encouraged and inspired.

[Angé · Rating 1 out of 5]

Ughhh the label of the book should state that this is a Christian self help book because I was not prepared for all the preaching and Christianese. I thought this was a book about how to cull the unnecessary crap I buy and practical ways to do it. Not turn off my phone or notifications because there’s a god who loves me and died for me. No. Why is this even a book? Nothing, I repeat, nothing was new. I feel awkies writing this because she opens the book about how people online are mean etc but I’m honestly not trying to be. I literally just finished the book so I can give an honest review, even though I want to jump ship when I felt like I was in a women’s ministry being told to serve my husband. Nooo I wish I didn’t read this because it triggered so many traumas from the church for me.