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Are You the F**king Doctor?: Tales from the bleeding edge of medicine

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‘I love Liam and his writing for three reasons. One, he tells it fearlessly like it is, as he is, and not under some sheepish pseudonym. Two, just because he tells it like it is, doesn't mean it's true. Like all great comic writers, he polishes a grain of truth until it’s a pearl of pleasure and beautifully-crafted debauchery that still smells true. Three, unless he's been lying to me, Liam is a deeply flawed individual with a heart of gold whose life is even more interesting than the stuff he makes up.’ Dr Phil Hammond, author of ‘Trust me, I’m a doctor’ and Private Eye’s 'MD' columnist ‘A unique voice that combines insight, humour, and an often surreal style.’ Richard Smith, BMJ editor-in-chief 1991-2004 ‘Razor sharp wit and allure. His personal account of his addiction is one of the most compelling I have ever read.’ Chris Smith, The Naked Scientist ‘General practice is the great unknown. We stand on the cusp of the beyond. Science takes us only so far, then the maps stop in the grey areas of intuition, imagination and here be dragons. Lurching from heart-breaking tragedy to high farce, we are the Renaissance men and women of medicine; our art is intangible. Anything can walk through our door…’ Family doctor, Irishman, musician, award-winning author, anarchist and recovering morphine addict, Liam became a columnist for the BMJ in 1994. He went on to write for many major publications, winning a series of prestigious awards; in 2005, he was the first doctor to win Columnist of the Year in the Periodical Publishers Association awards. The book contains a selection of Liam’s best work, from his columns, blogs and short stories. Brilliantly funny, glittering with literary allusion and darkly wicked humour, this book is much more than a collection of stand-alone anecdotes and whimsical reflections, rather a compelling chronicle of the daily struggles – and personal costs – of a doctor at the coalface. Dr Liam Farrell was a family doctor on the Irish border and is an award-winning writer and seasoned broadcaster. He was a columnist for the British Medical Journal for 20 years and currently writes for GP, the leading publication for general practitioners in the UK. He has also been a columnist for The Lancet, the Journal of General Practice, the Belfast Telegraph and the Irish News. He wrote the entry on sex for The Oxford Companion to the Body. On Twitter he curates #Irishmed, a weekly global ‘tweetchat’ on all medical issues.

364 pages, Kindle Edition

Published November 7, 2018

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5 stars
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98 (24%)
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 38 reviews
Profile Image for Beachcomber.
893 reviews30 followers
July 18, 2019
Maybe others find this hilarious, I found it shit really. Far from being an insight into what a GP’s work is like, the book is a collection of article Farrell wrote - and it’s either utter purple prose fiction, drowning in “look at me I’m smart” intellectual references, or utterly boring (a lady brings in her husband’s stool sample... end of article). Eventually I started skimming and clawed my way to the finish.
Profile Image for Ruthy lavin.
453 reviews
September 22, 2019
A little bit too egotistical for me.
There is a fine line between telling a funny story and making fun of people and I found this Dr a little too sarcastic - he blatantly says he hates being touched by patients and isn’t fond of touching them because he doesn’t know where they’ve been..... maybe he chose the wrong profession??!
It scraped 2 stars because there’s no denying that he can write well, but this could have been a fascinating read if he didn’t have such an inflated ego.
323 reviews1 follower
July 31, 2019
I love a good medical memoir but found this one desperately dull - my fault for not having registered it was just a collection of very repetitive columns.
Profile Image for Nicki.
1,459 reviews
March 9, 2021
Well two years later here's my review, oops totally forgot to post this at the time!

If you’ve ever wondered what goes on in your G.P.’s head when you’re trying to explain your symptoms, then you’ll really enjoy this book. It’s full of highly amusing anecdotes that made me laugh out loud, blush and and even get a lump in my throat!

My absolute favourite anecdote is when the author and his patient end up reciting lines from an old Danny Kaye musical, The Court Jester whilst avoiding the subject of antibiotics!! I laughed out loud when the story of a mother and her teenage daughter recount how they’d been abducted by aliens and of course the Garden Party call out was truly marvellous!

The chapter about ‘The Troubles’ was heartbreaking, and full of wisdom that can only come from someone who lived and worked through it.

A wonderful collection of tales that will definitely make me look at my G.P. in a new way next time I see her.
Profile Image for Kerstin.
285 reviews286 followers
January 5, 2020
I only downloaded this book to my kindle because it was on sale and I needed a quick, fun read. I didn’t enjoy this at all. Some essays were fun, yes. Most of them rather blunt, tedious or utterly self-centric.
32 reviews
May 13, 2019
Honest, charming and slightly surreal insight into the life of a rural GP

This is a really good book and a great insight into the life of rural GP. It manages to be honest and charming, as well as surreal and laugh out loud funny.

It's worth noting that the book is essentially in two parts, it opens with a blisteringly truthful account of Liam's addiction and the things it did to him. After this is a collection of a large number of Liam's writing for various publications, but all centered around his life a rural GP. Some are sombre, some are deeply surreal, most are funny, but all are worth reading.

I'd recommend this for doctors or patients, which I guess is everyone. Unless they're dead, which probably limits their interest in reading completely. ;)
Profile Image for Joe.
58 reviews2 followers
March 30, 2020
Waste of time. I’ve read a lot of medical non fiction recently, so when I saw this I was hopeful. My first indication that I wouldn’t care for it was the opening chapter being a detailed description of abusing drugs, almost to the point of romanticising it. I don’t care for how it’s written, and instead of being a coherent book it comes across like the author has slapped together a bunch of stuff he’s previously written to try and make a bit of money from it.

It also doesn’t help that he’s snide, arrogant, and egotistical. Don’t waste your time unless you hate yourself.
Profile Image for Sara Stock.
177 reviews1 follower
April 19, 2023
3 years! That’s how long it took me to finish this bloody book! If I was capable of DNFing a book this would’ve been it. I’m a huge fan of medical stories and memoirs, this however was the most boring collection of “articles” I’ve ever read. Do yourself a favour and don’t waste 3 years of your life like I did!
4 reviews
July 12, 2019
I couldn't get into the author's writing style and barely made it through the first few chapters.
Profile Image for Robin.
Author 5 books25 followers
January 3, 2019
Dr. Liam Farrell, a family physician from Northern Ireland, has written a brilliant and witty book describing his life in medicine. The book is comprised of two parts. The first is a moving and harrowing description of Dr. Farrell’s struggle with morphine addiction. Comprised of one chapter, it describes his anticipation of an injection in passages that are poignant, riveting, and intensely human. The second and greater part of the book is a compilation of short columns he wrote for the British Medical Journal. Dated across the many decades of his career, they are organized into thematic chapters such as “Christmas and New Year,” “The NHS”, and “House Calls.”

The BMJ articles sparkle with Dr. Farrell’s wit. Screamingly funny satire and sarcasm are dazzlingly showcased. What I found the most delightful was the sheer literacy of it: the BMJ columns are peppered throughout with clever literary allusions, often hilariously contrasted with the prosaic setting of a family practice. (For example: “A chubby chap, like Oliver Hardy (without the sense of humour), he was a firm subscriber to Dylan Thomas’s philosophy: ‘Do not go gentle into that good night/Rage, rage against the dying of the light,’ but decided to so subscribe at an inappropriately early age.”) Many of the columns affectionately mock an everyman patient “Joe,” whose hypochondriasis is equalled only by his undignified complaints involving his nether regions. Some pieces are laugh-out -loud whimsy, as in the chapter in which famous mythical figures come to his surgery. I was in stitches when Achilles, trailed by a Greek chorus, comes in with his mighty thews and an ankle injury. Others describe more true-to-life topics, such as an award-winning description of an attempt to smuggle a gunshot victim over the border during the Irish Troubles. Throughout it all, Dr. Farrell’s literary voice compels – alternately soaring, self-deprecating, scalding, and satirical.

Despite its humour, something noble emerges from this book. The reader is highly amused, but also changed – we are gifted with a rare glimpse into a life spent striving to confront the challenges of front-line medicine. What emerges is a vision of a true career - a lifetime spent in committed service.

My only wish for this book would be for it show even more of Dr. Farrell’s impressive range. The first chapter on his drug addiction underscored how he can explore the depths of desperate and dark subjects. As a physician, he no doubt encountered tragic cases of trauma and serious illness; perhaps because these topics do not lend themselves to the BMJ column format, they are rarely developed in that part of the book. I am looking forward to future writings from this gifted writer in which the full scope of his prodigious talent can be expressed, including treatments of more serious material. Perhaps we can look forward to a novel one day?
Profile Image for Rachel Bridgeman.
1,104 reviews29 followers
March 4, 2019
What did I love about this book?

Well there is the fact that I have a keen interest in medical memoirs as an almost nurse and ex-midwife, but what makes this such an exceptional read is it’s accessibility. It’s not aimed at those with any kind of medical background , you can enjoy this on any level as it is pure gold story telling at it’s best.
Liam’s voice comes through loud and clear- the first part where he talks about injecting morphine may seem like an odd place to start a memoir/collection of writings BUT I think it is because once that was out of the way, he gets on to the stuff he really wants to focus on. Sort of ‘here it is, now that’s been dealt with , let’s move on and not linger!’ He does not want the focus to be on this and as I am typing I realise that I am now making it one so moving on…
The experiences, anecdotes and musings are brilliantly sketched. In short pieces he manages to conjure an image of himself as a person not defined by his role-it is an aspect of what he does and puts him into contact with the people that he is keen to talk about as well as the situations he ends up in.His family stories are FABULOUS, I laughed loud and often at the tales of his Auntz and totally agree there is a need to instal Wiis in every nursing home. It is a grand idea!
This is a book for the senses-all are engaged in vivid detail as the frailties and mysteries of the human body in all its guises are laid bare for the reader. You learn about the medical profession from the view of the insider but he completely puts his own spin on what he thinks without his pieces becoming polemics.
It’s about love and life and death, all of the pitstops along the way and the laugh out loud moments that you just know will become conversation owners -I ,for one,am never going to forget Joe and his hydrocele which he’d named ‘Norm’.Rich in tone and tale, this is a treasury of moving, comedic and philosophical observations and life lessons learned whilst practicing the art of medicine and we are so much better off for reading it.
To conclude, please buy the f***ing book !
Profile Image for Phil Whitaker.
Author 10 books9 followers
March 5, 2019
Any GP who's been in practice a while will have encountered an endless array of quirky patients and extraordinary stories; a few GPs are even quite good at rendering them in written form. But there is only ever going to be one Dr Liam Farrell - a brilliant and unique talent. I used to turn straight to his column back in the days when GP Magazine came in a print edition - he would often make me cry with laughter; stop me in my tracks with an arresting thought or image; and I would frequently be clutching at the coat-tails of his racing, jinxing imagination, his sentences cavorting in a breathtaking whirl of surreal, magical mischief. Time and again, in just a few hundred words, he would transport me, body and soul, to his rural Irish general practice, its patients and their culture vividly real to me - none more so than his inimitable heartsink 'Joe'.
This book, then, was an absolute joy, anthologising the very best of Farrell's work both from GP Magazine, and also from his BMJ columns, plus a few other gems besides. It should carry a health warning: I found it addictive, and greedily consumed it in a matter of a few days, lost in admiration and fond nostalgia for the cynical-yet-caring leather-jacketed family doctor who used to be depicted alongside his GP Magazine columns back in the day.
Farrell made a trade-mark of revealing himself to be every bit as flawed as the rest of humankind, so expect earthy, bawdy humour in equal measure to his lightly worn literary sensibility. You can also expect a typically honest and raw opening in which Farrell portrays on his own struggle with addiction, which sets the scene for the maverick, empathic doctor we gradually come to know and love as the pages turn.
I guarantee you will be moved, amused, engaged, and entertained. Your very heart will be warmed. And probably, like me, you will read the final pages with a sense of sadness that this amazing doctor has now retired. His patients will be missing him sorely, I am sure. Thankfully, he is captured and preserved here on the printed page. I will re-visit him often.
Profile Image for Louise.
363 reviews20 followers
March 10, 2019

Are You The Fxxking Doctor? is a collection of articles written by Dr. Liam Farrell, a highly regarded medical author, and retired GP from County Armagh, Northern Ireland.

I started reading the book expecting something very different from what was written in the first chapter.  Instead of laugh out loud anecdotes about the trials and tribulations of being a General Practioner I was actually met with a very dark, graphic and brutally honest depiction of drug addiction. What was most shocking was that the addiction was actually Dr. Farrell's own!

The rest of the book is about the career of a GP, split into small chapters which are easy to pick up and not particularly in any order. I particularly enjoyed Chapter Fifteen which is entitled Medical Maxims (or known on Twitter as#TipsForNewDocs). I  enjoyed this topic and know I will reread again frequently. This is the type of book you can return to and you will always read something different which completely passed you by previously.

The writing is extremely clever, insightful and full of dry wit. This obviously helped enormously when faced with some rather bizarre situations throughout his career. An example of this was when Dr.Farrell visited a very old, sick friend (and patient) in his final hours. He arrived to find a full-scale wake taking place amongst the Irish neighbours...despite the old gentleman still being alive! You'll have to read the book yourself to discover the doctor's priceless reaction!

As an ex NHS administrator myself I understood many of Dr. Farrell's frustrations. I recognised the patients who expected a doctor to be able to cure anything magically with a prescription for antibiotics and the never-ending complaints about bodily functions. I did find some of the medical terminology difficult to understand but feel that a student nurse or doctor would enjoy the book to its full potential.

Only a person with a massive sense of humour and a huge heart could do this job, and Are You The Fuxxking Doctor? illustrates this to perfection.
Profile Image for Lucia Gannon.
Author 1 book19 followers
December 2, 2018
A laugh out loud compilation of stories that takes you to the edge of medicine and beyond.

It’s difficult to describe this book. The most striking feature is that it made me laugh out loud again and again. As a doctor I get it. The humor, sometimes black, sometimes surreal but always entertaining. Liam goes to the edge and over and I know exactly what he means but would never have been able to describe it quite as he does.
The most surprising feature is the abundance of literary and mythological references. Most of which went over my head as I am afraid I am not that well read but this did not detract from my enjoyment. It only made me want to understand what the hell he was talking about. I have a lot of reading to do it seems.
If Tommy Tiernan was a doctor I think this is what he would write.
Thank you Liam for this treasure trove of stories. And for sharing your view of humanity. I have been a fan of your columns for years but it is great to have such a comprehensive compilation to turn at will.
I look forward to the next installment.
Profile Image for Sarah.
1,219 reviews12 followers
August 6, 2019
This is another one of those memoirs to an ordinary profession, in this case a country doctor, and his experiences as a GP in a rural community in Northern Ireland. To start off with, the “memories” that he related don’t really have an awful lot to do with medical situations of the people he treats. There are some sections of a couple of the “memories” that seem to have been copied and pasted from others.

One of the problems I have with this book though, is that a lot of these “memories” is that they kind of don’t make sense. There is a great sense of the author wanting to show us how intelligent he is by peppering in these great literary references. They don’t add much to the articles and sometimes you need to look u what the f*ck he is talking about.

Anyways, this is a bit of a long read that you end up clawing your way to the end of because it’s just getting to be a bit too much.
345 reviews
February 28, 2023
An entertaining collection of articles that have appeared previously in various medical journals, plus some explanatory footnotes and a chapter describing his drug addiction, now thankfully something of the past.

The author is an Irish GP, blessed with the ability to write fluently and funnily. There are lots of quotations from, and paraphrasing of, poetry. He sometimes goes into flights of fancy, but is grounded in the day-to-day realities of his job. There are a few running jokes, for instance the demand from patients for antibiotics, regardless of their symptoms, and his attempts to persuade them that they’re unnecessary.

An added bonus for me is that his views on homeopathy and other quack medicine, the right to an abortion, religion’s delusions, Trump, Brexit etc coincide with mine.
129 reviews1 follower
May 6, 2019
In 2018 I read quite a few books and stalled on this one. It stopped me reading for quite a while as I like to finish what I start reading. Sometimes a hard read has a good story so it's worth the effort. I didn't like the politics, some of the things he said and some of the views he has but in parts it was funny and thought provoking. It's always good to read things that you are at odds with and challenge what you think.
Profile Image for Carla.
67 reviews2 followers
December 16, 2019
I rarely give up on a book part way through but I got 80% through this and had to stop for fear I may actually throw my kindle out a window. I was lulled into a false sense of excitement with Chapter 1...now that’s a story I could have enjoyed (addiction).

It was downhill from there and I’ve now given up. Self indulgent writing, borderline manic fantasy style and simply just not for me. Others may pick this up and love it but it’s a strong no from me.
15 reviews
March 4, 2021
Honest, funny, fallible a d sometimes a little overdone.

At his best when dealing with real people and real situations. The reworking of myths or fairytales in some pieces was laboured and dispensable, and I got rather tired of heart sink patient Joe. That said , always interestIng, and sometimes moving. It is also refreshing to read a doctor who is candid about the limitations of medicine and possessed of killer arguments against private medicine.
27 reviews1 follower
December 10, 2019
Disclosure: I didn't finish this one.

The prose is really well-written but the subject matter is stereotyped to the point of caricature. This might have been enough to getting some knowing smiles out of doctors reading the BMJ for five minutes 20 years ago but right now, felt really, really tedious.
Profile Image for Seren Burton.
51 reviews2 followers
December 29, 2019
Too egotistical for me. I found it really hard to follow at first, and then realised it was a collection of his columns. It’s quite repetitive and very very self indulgent, with lots of literary references that ooze arrogance. There are definitely some funny parts but overall this was a long slog. Some stories were obviously fictional, others were hard to tell. Wouldn’t recommend.
Profile Image for Sharon Thompson.
Author 4 books20 followers
January 3, 2019
A fine book for those who read short stories or who want something different to a novel. Each chapter is a gem. Footnotes are appreciated due to the medical subject matter. The wit is priceless and the writing excellent.
229 reviews2 followers
August 18, 2020
I just didn't get on with this book. I read about a quarter of it and realised I was not enjoying it. I found the writer sarcastic and a bit mean and I intensely disliked the way he talked about his patient is a rather mocking way. Not funny and not a great read.
Profile Image for Sophie Cremen.
7 reviews2 followers
January 2, 2019
Beautiful and funny writing.
Gut wrenching stories and vivid stories of general medicine and glorious fanciful tales.

A brilliant read.
Profile Image for Páidí Dubháin.
2 reviews1 follower
February 12, 2019
Clever writing, priceless wit. Plenty of lol moments that you'd never expect from an ex doctor!
Profile Image for Anna Maria.
342 reviews
August 12, 2019
Not as funny as other people thought. Some parts were ok, I prefer Roddy Doyle he is by far better in my opinion.
11 reviews
November 17, 2019
Awful

Not a likeable person and comes across very arrogant. The confessions of a gp books are way better and far more real patient stories. Disappointed 😞
Profile Image for Shereese Maynard.
67 reviews28 followers
January 26, 2020
This book was everything a book written by a physician should be. It was anecdotal, funny, and healing. Every doctor and every patient should read this.
Profile Image for Liv.
36 reviews2 followers
February 5, 2020
DNF’ed in the second chapter.
I thought it was going to be a fun uplifting, with a serious message mixed in. Just got all the serious, which just wasn’t what I was looking for really.
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