My Life as a Rat

by Joyce Carol Oates

“A painful truth of family the most tender emotions can change in an instant.  You think your parents love you but is it you they love, or the child who is theirs? ”  --Joyce Carol Oates, My Life as a Rat Which should loyalty to family or loyalty to the truth? Is telling the truth ever a mistake and is lying for one’s family ever justified?  Can one do the right thing, but bitterly regret it?   My Life as a Rat follows Violet Rue Kerrigan, a young woman who looks back upon her life in exile from her family following her testimony, at age twelve, concerning what she knew to be the racist murder of an African-American boy by her older brothers. In a succession of vividly recalled episodes Violet contemplates the circumstances of her life as the initially beloved youngest child of seven Kerrigan children who inadvertently “informs” on her brothers, setting into motion their arrests and convictions and her own long estrangement. Arresting and poignant, My Life as a Rat traces a life of banishment from a family—banishment from parents, siblings, and the Church—that forces Violet to discover her own identity, to break the powerful spell of family, and to emerge from her long exile as a “rat” into a transformed life.

Genres: Fiction, Contemporary, Literary Fiction, Audiobook, Drama, Novels, Historical Fiction

402 pages, Hardcover

First published June 4, 2019

About the author

Joyce Carol Oates is an American writer. Oates published her first book in 1963, and has since published 58 novels, a number of plays and novellas, and many volumes of short stories, poetry, and nonfiction. Her novels Black Water (1992), What I Lived For (1994), and Blonde (2000), and her short story collections The Wheel of Love (1970) and Lovely, Dark, Deep: Stories (2014) were each finalists for the Pulitzer Prize. She has won many awards for her writing, including the National Book Award, for her novel Them (1969), two O. Henry Awards, the National Humanities Medal, and the Jerusalem Prize (2019).
Oates taught at Princeton University from 1978 to 2014, and is the Roger S. Berlind '52 Professor Emerita in the Humanities with the Program in Creative Writing. From 2016 to 2020, she was a visiting professor at the University of California, Berkeley, where she taught short fiction in the spring semesters. She now teaches at Rutgers University, New Brunswick.
Oates was elected to the American Philosophical Society in 2016.
Pseudonyms: Rosamond Smith and Lauren Kelly.

Reviews

[Angela M · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.5 stars .

This is not an easy book to read. A word of warning - there is child abuse and sexual abuse and violence. I managed to get through these brutal parts of the book and as difficult as it was, I found it to be a powerful story. It’s about family loyalty, betrayals and it’s a stark commentary on inexplicable hate and racism. Taking place in the 1990’s in upstate NY, it’s stunning and sad to think about how relevant the depiction of racism is today. A dysfunctional Irish family where the father’s word is law and the sons are more important than the daughters and family loyalty is everything, no matter what and I mean no matter what. They do horrible things attributed to “boys will be boys”. “The family is a special destiny. The family into which you are born and from which there can be no escape.”

Twelve year old Violet Rue Kerrigan hears her brothers talking late one night and watches them bury a bloody baseball bat that they can’t get clean. She knows what they did. One of her brothers wants to make sure she won’t tell and it’s this physical abuse which leads her to “rat” on them, not intentionally but she just blurted it out when she is being taken care of for injuries at school. “ I was twelve years old. This was the morning of the last day of my childhood.” A child traumatized by what she knows, by what she has said is taken away from her family . That to me was the ultimate betrayal. She is not just taken away for her safety; her family didn’t want her. And if you think it can’t get any darker than this, you’d be mistaken. I had to put it down at one point because the things that happen to Violet in the years she is exiled from her family were horrific.

Oates is a prolific writer with numerous novels and this is the forth book I have read by her and by far the darkest. It is depressing to say the least, but yet I could see a glimpse of hope that there might be healing and forgiveness, at least for Violet. I’m not sure this book is for everyone, but I suspect if you are a fan of Joyce Carol Oates, you will want to read it.

(This is an advanced copy so quotes may be subject to change.)

I received an advanced copy of this book from Ecco through Edelweiss.

[Mª Carmen · Rating 5 out of 5]

5/5⭐
Una novela tan buena como dura. Con una prosa exquisita, desgarradora y cruda en algunos momentos, envolvente y preciosista en otros, nos va a contar una historia durísima que no nos dejará indiferentes. Se vale, para ello, de unos personajes soberbios, muy especialmente el de Violet, la protagonista.

Dice la sinopsis:
Violet Rue Kerrigan, recuerda su vida después de que, con doce años, ofreciera su testimonio sobre el asesinato racista de un niño afroamericano cometido por dos de sus hermanos mayores. Ese hecho supuso que su familia la repudiara de manera inmediata. En una sucesión de episodios recordados de un modo casi palpable, Violet analiza las circunstancias de su vida como la menor de siete hermanos, una niña en su momento querida, que inadvertidamente «delata» a sus hermanos, dando pie a su arresto, su condena y a su propio distanciamiento. ¿Se puede hacer lo correcto y que toda la vida nos lamentemos por ello?

La trama se prolonga desde que Violet tiene 12 años, hasta los 27. La culpa, el rechazo, la traición, el rencor, la venganza, el desarraigo son emociones que van a conjugarse durante toda la novela. Será la propia Violet, en primera persona quién nos narrará su vida en esos años.
Violet, se cría en un familia disfuncional. Un padre machista de difícil carácter. Racista paleto en un pueblo pequeño. Una madre con siete hijos, abrumada por lo que supone una familia tan extensa, descontenta con la vida, pero incapaz de oponerse a los deseos de su marido, al que siempre pone en primer lugar. Nuestra protagonista es la pequeña de los siete hermanos. Pasa de ser la más mimada, la más querida, a la "delatora, rata de alcantarilla" cuyo nombre no se pronuncia. Tras acusar a su hermanos, su familia la exilia (se le deja claro que nunca podrá volver), su entorno la rechaza. Durante 13 años no volverá a hablar con sus padres y muy pocas veces con una de sus hermanas.

Resulta desgarrador ver las consecuencias que para su vida tiene ese exilio. Profundamente traumatizada, se va a vivir a cientos de kilómetros de su casa, con su tía Irma, la hermana de su madre, la única que ha querido recogerla. Irma, que no tiene hijos, está dispuesta a brindarle todo su amor y convencida de que poco a poco su sobrina confiará en ellos y les devolverá ese mismo cariño. Sin embargo, el trauma que arrastra Violet, la incapacita para dar y recibir cariño. Durante años vivirá pendiente de recibir esa llamada o esa carta de sus padres, perdonándola y pidiéndole que vuelva a casa. No es capaz de ver nada más.
Es tremendo constatar, la manera que tiene su familia de desplazar la culpa de los hermanos asesinos a Violet. Aquellos serán los injustamente encausados y ella la culpable de todos los males presentes y por venir. No habrá perdón ni comprensión.

En cierto modo, también su familia de acogida la defraudará. Cuando está a punto de cumplir los 18 años se ve obligada a irse. Irma, que en un principio se muestra reticente a su partida, al final cede. La despide con cariño, sí, pero también con alivio, con una frase de esas que se clavan en el alma " ... como tú bien dices, ya ha llegado el momento de que te vayas".

El trauma y el desarraigo, la convierten en una persona carente de autoestima. Se pone en y tolera situaciones que no habrían acontecido de ser otras las circunstancias. Cree merecer un castigo, se sabotea continuamente a sí misma. Su vida durante esos 13 años es un ir a la deriva, si bien al final consigue reconducirla un poco.

Pasados 13 años, un acontecimiento desgraciado, la lleva de vuelta a su pueblo. Lo que se va a encontrar no es lo que esperaba. Ni ella ni sus familiares son ya los mismos. Lo único que permanece es el rencor y el deseo de venganza. Violet, comprenderá que no hay vuelta atrás.

Otro punto destacable es que sea precisamente Violet, la única que sienta la necesidad de reparar el daño cometido contra la familia del adolescente negro asesinado por sus hermanos. Durante años, en la medida de sus posibilidades procurará hacerlo.

Como ya comenté antes, los personajes son magníficos. Si bien destaca, por derecho propio, el de Violet, el resto no le va a la zaga. El retrato de ambos padres es esclarecedor, así como el de alguno de sus hermanos como Lionel, Katie y Miriam. Saldrán poco pero bastarán unas pocas pinceladas para que Oates nos los presente.

Me ha gustado el final, al menos aporta un poco de esperanza entre tanta tristeza.

En conclusión, muy dura, muy buena y muy recomendable, aunque no para cualquier momento.

[Diane S ☔ · Rating 3 out of 5]

Violet is only twelve when she looses those most important her life. The youngestt of seven, raised by a mother who makes it clear that girls don't matter, only the boys are important. When an act of violence occurs, Violet becomes privy to some information she wishes she didn't have. Racial bias, mysogeny, family truth, the bonds that break are all explored. When she can no longer hold the truth in, Violet does the unthinkable as far as her family is concerned, she tells the truth. Instant banishment.

This is one intense book, difficult to read, dfficult to understand the actions of her mother. The first part is portrayed so realistically, almost seems like one of those documentary show that are so popular right now. The book goes further to show exactly how this incident, affects Violet throughout her life. Her life as a rat. The book changes points of view, tenses from 1st to 2nd to 3rd, mimicking the trials of Violet as she tries to figure out where she belongs, who she is, and who she is going to be. Sometimes her thoughts,meander almost the point of the surrealistic. How repeated violence ad banishment from ones own family causes a divide in the psyche.

For thee most part this is well done, we do get the full impact of the tragedy,but I think sometimes less is more. Too much happens to one person, a person who is now afraid to tell, since the first time cost her so much. There are many sexual scenes, language issues, and again I think are cook have been left out. Still I did come to care about Violet and this kept me reading on. Hard not to root the young girl who must grow up in her difficult circumstances. I think you will root for her too.

ARC from Edelweiss.

[Kansas · Rating 4 out of 5]

"No parecía existir equivalente masculino para -montar un número, para exhibirse-.
Como tampoco (algo que descubriría más tarde) existe equivalente masculino para zorra, para furcia."

A estas alturas no es ningún secreto que Joyce Carol Oates es una de mis autoras favoritas, y por mucho que haya leído de su obra, y por mucho que siga publicando, siempre me maravilla la capacidad que tiene de sorprenderme. Si es cierto que los temas que aborda en Delatora no son nuevos, misoginia, la búsqueda de tu propia identidad, el racismo y la violencia sobre la mujer, sin embargo, en esta novela da un paso más y Joyce Carol Oates analiza lo que supone para una niña enfrentarse desde los 12 hasta su plena juventud a una toxicidad masculina que por culpa de las vivencias familiares no es capaz de desterrar de su vida.

Delatora, cuyo titulo original es My Life As A Rat, sigue los pasos de Violet Rue Kerrigan, la séptima e hija menor de Jerome y Lula Kerrigan, católicos, irlandeses y leales a su clan que a consecuencia de un episodio que ocurre en su familia cuando ella tiene doce años, es expulsada de su familia para vivir con una tia en otra ciudad. Durante su infancia Violet había sido testigo en primera persona de lo que significaba ser la hija adorada de Jerome Kerrigan, dominante y muy masculino, y de Lula, una mujer que había enseñado a sus hijas a callarse y a no rebelarse ante este patriarcado tan cerrado y tóxico. A simple vista su madre era una abnegada esposa y madre, pero Violet es testigo de varios episodios durante su infancia durante los cuales percibe una honda amargura en su madre que la hace intuir, en su percepción todavía de niña, que la vida que lleva no es quizás la que hubiera querido llevar:

"Tuvo que dejar de estudiar a los dieciséis años porque su familia necesitaba el dinero (...) Cinco años. Había trabajado seis días por semana durante cinco años hasta que conoció a mi padre, se casaron, empezó a tener hijos y a ocuparse de su casa, siete días a la semana. Su voz subía y bajaba en una furiosa cantinela...
dejar de estudiar, dieciséis, casaron, empezó a tener hijos. Siete días a la semana."

(...)

"Tan ocupada con la casa y con los niños que Lula no conseguía dedicarle al jardín el tiempo que hacia falta. Llena de esperanza al inicio del verano, plantaba simientes en metódicas hileras, colocando plantas procedentes del vivero, y luego en unas pocas semanas las malas hierbas estaban asfixiándolo todo (...) Todos los malditos veranos de su vida, siempre lo mismo. Lloraba, maldecía. ¡Siete hijos!... y el marido."

Durante el primer tercio de la novela, JCO nos hace una descripción fascinante de lo que supone este clima familiar que Violet respira hasta los doce años. Bajo la sombra de un padre tan dominante, es casi imposible rebelarse, y Violet no es capaz de cuestionar nada: los hombres de su familia son los dominantes, y la condescendencia paternalista hacia las mujeres es lo normal.

Delatora me ha recordado a Qué fue de los Mulvaney, por lo que supone el tema de la orfandad y de que te expulsen de tu propia familia, un tema interesantísimo y muy doloroso, que JCO exploraba en los Mulvaney con maestria pero haciendo un dibujo más general de la familia; en Delatora, sin embargo, se centra más en un personaje, el de una niña que es desterrada por su propia familia, y la autora aborda con enorme destreza lo que supone para una niña que hasta ahora había pertenecido al férreo clan de los Kerrigan verse una huérfana emocional: de la noche a la mañana se ve sola, combatiendo sus propios fantasmas.

"No me puedo creer que de verdad yo no le importe a nadie. Como suele decirse, no nos podemos imaginar el mundo sin nosotros".

Como dije antes, para mi el tema principal de esta novela, es quizás el shock que pueda suponer para una mujer todavía en plena búsqueda de sí misma, vulnerable y frágil, encontrarse con un perfil de hombres dominantes, y de cómo esta toxicidad se puede camuflar bajo una falsa máscara de “romanticismo” mal entendido por parte de ellas. JCO es una diosa a la hora de retratar la adolescencia, la confusión de sentimientos, y esa inseguridad emocional que hace a la adolescente ser como un árbol mecido por el viento, pero si llega el huracán, quizás te pueda destrozar de por vida. Esta autora siempre ha demostrado una gran destreza a la hora de adentrarse en la psicología humana, pero en esta novela también demuestra que sabe mucho de la psicologia de las relaciones tóxicas, de la dependencia emocional a alguien más fuerte.

El otro punto fuerte de JCO es el retrato que hace de la familia, americana en su caso, pero imagino que también universal; es un ente aparentemente compacto frente a la galeria, pero escarbando como ella lo hace, aparecen puntos oscuros, terrores que creíamos que solo podían estar en la mente, pero al leerla, sabemos que es real. JCO pone el dedo en la llaga y hace aflorar temas que podían ser tabú, y en Delatora maneja con enorme habilidad el hecho de que la familia también puede ser una esclavitud emocional de la que llegado un punto, hay que saber liberarse.

En definitiva, otra novela estupenda de esta autora, grande, y de la que es una suerte poder seguir disfrutando de una o dos de sus obras al año. Sigue siendo más que nunca la retratista de la América contemporánea.

Nota: En su antología "I Am No One You Know", aparece nuestro primer acercamiento a esta novela y es en forma de cuento "Curly Red", es la misma historia pero en Delatora, Joyce Carol Oates la desarrolla. Lo menciono por si a alguien le interesa leerse el cuento.

"Solo corro para seguir viva."

https://kansasbooks.blogspot.com/2021...

[☘Misericordia☘ ⚡ϟ⚡⛈⚡☁ ❇️❤❣ · Rating 5 out of 5]

JCO made me read it! She's being as visceral as ever in this one. Where her style uniquely fits to call attention to social problems: so very graphic but only up to a point where the reader get to think, a lot. She lets the reader to reach conclusions on their own but firmly steers them to reaching the right ones. Love her prose.

Minus 1 star for the disheveled descriptions straying around the topics (though it's a recognizable part of her style). Plus a million stars for the uniquely hypnotic quality of her writing, which mesmerizes reader into reading about even the most horrible of things.

I've always been leery of racial topics, they just weren't an issue where I grew up and so I get totally flabbergasted about cruelty motivated by the perceived differences of race, looks, etc. Well, JCO could write about how grass grows and I would stay reading.

Q:
Parading around like she owns the place. (c)
Q:
“I enlisted. I was nineteen. I was stupid.” (c)
Q:
The sexual threat of boys is greatly diminished, by the (mere) existence of a girl’s brothers.
Unless of course the girl’s brothers are themselves the (sexual) threat.
Parents have not a clue. Cannot guess. The (secret) lives of children, adolescents. Thinking that, because we are quiet, or docile (seeming), because we smile on cue and seem happy, because we are no trouble, that our inner lives are placid, and not churning and choppy and terrifying as the Niagara River as it gathers momentum rushing to the Falls. (c)
Q:
And eventually we learned what had happened, or some version of what had happened, as we learned most things not meant for us to know, piecing together fragments of stories as our mother sometimes, with a curious sort of self-punishing patience, fitted together broken crockery to mend with glue. (c)
Q:
When my mother hung up I asked what “fixed” meant. I wondered if whatever the boys had done to her, Liza might need fixing like a broken clock.
Disdainfully my mother said, “Like a cat, spayed. So it can’t have kittens people have to drown.” (c)
Q:
What their father called fucking real-life. Didn’t know how the hell long he could take this fucking real-life. (c)
Q:
For it was not always clear, our mother knew: the distinction between commiseration and gloating. (c)
Q:
JCO visceral as usual. Her style uniquely fits to call attention to social problems. She's, as usual, very graphic but only up to a classy point. She lets the reader to reach conclusions on their own but firmly steers them to reaching the right ones. Love her prose.

Minus 1 star for the disheveled descriptions straying around the topics (though it's a recognizable part of her style). Plus a million stars for the uniquely hypnotic quality of her writing, which mesmerizes reader into reading about even the most horrible of things.

I've always been leery of racial topics, they just weren't an issue where I grew up and so I get totally flabbergasted about cruelty motivated by the perceived differences of race, looks, etc. Well, JCO could write about how grass grows and I would stay reading. She made me read it!

Q:
Parading around like she owns the place. (c)
Q:
“I enlisted. I was nineteen. I was stupid.” (c)
Q:
The sexual threat of boys is greatly diminished, by the (mere) existence of a girl’s brothers.
Unless of course the girl’s brothers are themselves the (sexual) threat.
Parents have not a clue. Cannot guess. The (secret) lives of children, adolescents. Thinking that, because we are quiet, or docile (seeming), because we smile on cue and seem happy, because we are no trouble, that our inner lives are placid, and not churning and choppy and terrifying as the Niagara River as it gathers momentum rushing to the Falls. (c)
Q:
And eventually we learned what had happened, or some version of what had happened, as we learned most things not meant for us to know, piecing together fragments of stories as our mother sometimes, with a curious sort of self-punishing patience, fitted together broken crockery to mend with glue. (c)
Q:
When my mother hung up I asked what “fixed” meant. I wondered if whatever the boys had done to her, Liza might need fixing like a broken clock.
Disdainfully my mother said, “Like a cat, spayed. So it can’t have kittens people have to drown.” (c)
Q:
What their father called fucking real-life. Didn’t know how the hell long he could take this fucking real-life. (c)
Q:
For it was not always clear, our mother knew: the distinction between commiseration and gloating. (c)
Q:
He lived in his own cloud of—whatever it was—wanting to believe what he wanted to believe. Most men are like that. (с)
Q:
It would become a matter of public record: the unsolicited, uncoerced, purely voluntary information ...
In this way the remainder of my life was decided. (c)
Q:
Tentative accounts of Hadrian Johnson as a drug dealer, Hadrian Johnson having provoked the attack, Hadrian Johnson having been attacked by other, black assailants which Jerome Kerrigan Jr. and the other boys had only happened to see while driving ... (c)
Q:
Skinny enough to push through a narrow space (window opened at the bottom, just a few inches) the way an animal would—one of those desperate creatures who, to be freed from a trap, would gnaw off a paw with their teeth. (с)
Q:
Thrilling to be outdoors, out of the safe house. (c)
Q:
Wildly I thought—I will hide in our house. In the cellar. No one will know. (c)
Q:
Often bizarre dream-figures crowded near to observe me with unnatural interest like piranha fish approaching their prey with caution. (c)
Q:
... I could not share the small allotments of “news” of my life with anyone—there was so little of it. (c)
Q:
... I began to feel pitiful even to myself like a dog whose tail is thump-thump-thumping long after everyone has abandoned him. (c)
Q:
Why did I continue for years, more years than I would wish to admit, to send cards that were never answered?—no one would ask this question who’d been disowned.
Because you never give up. You never stop hoping. ...
Never stop hoping because if you do, what remains? (c)
Q:
Can’t believe that no one cares about me really. As it is said we can’t imagine the world without us. (c)
Q:
My secret was, I had no natural aptitude for any subject—for life itself.
Keeping myself alive. Keeping myself from drowning. That was the challenge. (c)
Q:
Amnesia was a balm. Amnesia is the great balm of life. ...
The reluctance to wake. A conviction that wakefulness is an unnatural state. (c)
Q:
At seventeen, I wasn’t a young girl. Not in my soul. No one messed around with me at school, I’d acquired something of the swagger of my older brothers serving time at Marcy. (c)
Q:
Grieving for a person who’d never existed—like reaching into your pocket and encountering a hole in the fabric. (c)
Q:
How airy I feel! A panel seems to be opening in the bleak sky.
I am made to feel light, effervescent. The leaden sensation drains from my limbs.
I am most alive at such times. I am hopeful. My vision is almost too sharp.
...
The sound of wind in the trees—soughing.
Faces of strangers startling and beautiful.
Eyes of strangers startling and beautiful. (c)
Q:
My wish is to live a life in which emotions come slowly as clouds on a calm day. You see the approach, you contemplate the beauty of the cloud, you observe it passing, you let it go. You do not dwell upon what you have seen, you do not regret it. You are content to understand that the identical cloud will never come again, no matter how beautiful, unique. You do not weep at its loss. (c)

[Michael Finocchiaro · Rating 3 out of 5]

Perhaps, I am just never going to be a fan of Joyce Carol Oates. I found My Life as a Rat pedantic, predictable and a slog to read. All the characters were one-dimensional and the story seemed to want to exploit racism and violence towards young women without really delving sufficiently into the causes.

Oates uses the murder witness trope where the youngest daughter of a Catholic upper-middle-class family overhears a conversation of her guilty brothers and sees the murder weapon (this is not a spoiler since it is written on all the descriptions of the book, no worries). But, since her dad is not Atticus Finch, and she is no Scout Finch, things go very wrong for her in the immediate and in repercussions throughout her life. It wears on you. The Nazi math teacher was particularly poorly drawn and felt like she was hoping for a call from some random Netflix showrunner.

The ending, in particular, was disappointing. For example, what exactly is this supposed to mean?
Brightly you say: “It’s said that if life has no intrinsic meaning just having a family, keeping together, and alive, and keeping yourself alive, can provide the meaning.” These are words that you have heard, or have read. These are words Tyrell Jones would understand. Perhaps Tyrell is the originator of these exact words. Ironic that you of all people should be repeating these words as if you knew fully what they might mean." (p. 383)
I think it was just a bit too much gibberish and not enough good writing for me.

So, I think that she will be, for what, the fourth time, the bridesmaid and not the bride for the 2020 Pulitzer.

My List of 2020 Pulitzer hopefuls:
here
My blog about the 2020 Pulitzer: https://wp.me/phAoN-19m

[Michelle · Rating 3 out of 5]

Joyce Carol Oats is a name that is always popping up so I thought it was about time I gave her a whirl.

This book is cleverly written, I actually had to Google if this was based on a true story as its written almost in the format of a memoir and it feels real. It felt a bit muddled, a bit repetitive, as if the main character was talking to you and had forgotten what their last sentence was, which at times was endearing, at others annoying. And these feelings were present during the whole of my reading, either I was annoyed at the book or endeared towards it.

I do have a bit of an issue with the ending, I felt it just stopped, but I can live with it, I can kind of see why it would end that way.

While this hasnt blown me away, I will remember this story, these characters. I've read this kind of subject matter before, the way this was written was quite unique for me which will make this book memorable.

I will read JCO again in the future but I'll go for her most raved about book, Zombie.

[Roman Clodia · Rating 3 out of 5]

2.5 stars

I'm a huge, huge JCO fan so it pains me to be so critical - but this is a messy book that is also increasingly predictable, a cardinal literary sin that one would never expect to apply to the fertile imagination of JCO.

The first 30% or so draws us in to one of those complicated families that inhabit the JCO universe: the voice is that of Violet Rue, the youngest girl and her father's favourite, just 12 when the book opens, 27 when it closes and from which point she is telling her tale. Without giving away spoilers, this section deals with violence and loyalty within the family, and what happens when Violet unintentionally transgresses an unspoken family code.

From then, though, this descends into a litany of woes as Violet becomes a magnet for every kind of abuser out there and it's unconvincing that she should be such a poor little (female) victim preyed upon by an ongoing series of (male) predators. That's not to say that this kind of masculine violence doesn't happen, it just feels poorly imagined and rather superficially written, almost as if these gender roles are both institutionalised and impossible to overturn. It's the 1990s, after all, and Violet is at university - her utter naivety and passivity, her complete lack of any kind of resistance just doesn't ring true no matter how toxic her experience of family was.

The last part of the book returns to Violet's family... and, yes, more violence is in store for the poor girl.. I don't know - the whole thing feels messy emotionally and structurally and lacks the depth of empathetic and politicised intelligence I expect from JCO. She draws some very crude lines between racism and misogyny (yes, of course they're linked) that feel like a throwback to the 1960s or 1970s.

I would never want to dissuade anyone from reading JCO but this is far from her best... I understand this started as a short story and maybe the extension to novel was too forced

Thanks to the publisher for an ARC via NetGalley

[♥ Sandi ❣ · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.75 starts Thank you to Edelweiss and Ecco for allowing me to read and review this ARC. Published on June 4, 2019.

How do you make moral decisions? Does it depend on the circumstances? Depend on who may be involved? Depend on the outcome or on who knows what your decision is? Would that be different if you were a 12 year old child?

This is the story of Violet who had to make a moral decision. She had a secret. A secret about her brothers. She kept that secret, until she couldn't keep it anymore. Once revealed everything in her life changed. She had to leave her school, her friends, her very home. Her family shunned her. And not for a short time, but most of them for the rest of her life. She was 12 years old and the youngest of 7 children and none of them, including her parents, spoke to her for years afterward.

Two of her older brothers had killed a boy - a racial killing. Violet had overheard them talking and they shared their secret with her. Both brothers were convicted and sent to prison. Her family went into financial debt due to this and her father never forgave her.

The novel continues with the life Violet lived. How she processed what she had done. How she made a new life for herself and how she at long last related to the remaining members of her family, which also included one very traumatic episode.

A story of relationships, survival, overcoming family separation, loyalty, regret and love.

In my opinion one of Joyce Carol Oates best books.

[sAmAnE · Rating 5 out of 5]

آرزو می‌کنم زندگی‌ای داشته باشم که در آن عواطف و احساسات در روزی آرام، آهسته، به‌سان ابرهای آسمان در گذر باشند و تو نزدیک شدنشان را ببینی، در شکل و رنگ ابرها تعمق کنی و شاهد عبورشان باشی و بگذاری بگذرد و همواره به آنچه که گذشته نیندیشی و تأسف نخوری. رضایت داشته باشی از درک این واقعیت که ابرهای مشابه دیگر هرگز در آسمان زندگی‌ات ظاهر نخواهند شد، هیچ مهم نیست چقدر زیبا و منحصر به فرد بوده‌اند یا چقدر دردآور و زشت. دیگر برای آنچه که از دست داده‌ای مویه نخواهی کرد....

راوی این کتاب دختری هست که در سن دوازده سالگی بنا به دلیلی از خانواده‌اش طرد میشه... اون دلیل خیلی مهمه و گفتنش داستان رو اسپویل می‌کنه.... خانواده‌اش دیگه قبولش نمی‌کنند و اون شرایط و زندگی خیلی سختی رو‌میگذرونه... تک تک لحظاتی که باهاش مواجه میشه و تعریف می‌کنه غم‌انگیز و به شدت متأثرکننده هست... نشخواهرهای ذهنیش، حرف‌های توی دلش و غم‌هاش به شدت خواننده رو‌تحت تأثیر قرار میده و بدتر از اون زمانی‌که برمیگرده، امید داره ولی.... به نظرم شاید داستان یکم اغراق‌آمیز باشه ولی دور از واقعیت نیست، هرکسی ممکنه به نوعی طردشدگی رو حس کنه و باهاش در زندگی مواجه بشه که این خیلی دردآوره رنجی هست که تموم نمیشه... اون آدم‌ها تو رو با کلی سؤال تو ذهنت تنها میگذارن، سؤال‌هایی که حتی اگه خودتم بخوای نمیتونی جوابی براشون پیدا کنی....

[Dagio_maya · Rating 5 out of 5]

O dentro o fuori..

“Curioso. Che ‘famiglia’ significhi così tanto per la gente.”


South Niagara, Stato di New York.
E’ il 1991 quando succede qualcosa che cambierà per sempre la vita della dodicenne Violet Ru Kerrigan, catapultandola all'improvviso nel mondo adulto.
Dall'essere la piccola di casa, diventa la reietta, il Topo.
Dall'angolo ovattato in cui era cresciuta eccola di colpo ritrovarsi fuori, in un mondo infido, pronto ad approfittare della sua più grande debolezza:
il bisogno di essere amata.
Violet trascinerà la sua vita assentandosene...

Oates è un’autrice tra le più versatili,
Per me è una conferma della sua abilità nel saper scavare la psicologia dei suoi personaggi.
Una perizia che si esprime benissimo anche nella rappresentazione dei quadri famigliari e nelle ferite che incidono il già turbolento periodo dell’adolescenza.

Quella dei Kerrigan è una storia tipica dei clan irlandesi che – al pari di altre famiglie d’immigrati – compattano i propri confini e si serrano in un orgoglioso pensiero pseudo-cattolico, maschilista e soprattutto bianco.
L’occhio, di fatti, si allarga nel riprendere questa perenne guerra sociale che gli Stati Uniti scontano come un’antica colpa non espiata mai abbastanza.
Quel “noi” e quel “loro” che si concretizza nell'urbanistica delle piccole, medie e grandi città con i ghetti delle periferie.
Una lotta quotidiana che non ammette tradimenti né da un lato né dall’altro.


” Qualcuno ha detto che se la vita non ha un senso in sé e per sé, il senso puoi trovarlo nell’avere una famiglia, nel mantenerla unita e viva, e nel mantenere in vita te stesso.”

[Repix Pix · Rating 5 out of 5]

Una historia de familias, pérdida y mucho dolor.
Me ha sobrecogido.

[Come Musica · Rating 5 out of 5]

Anche in "Ho fatto la spia", come negli ultimi romanzi che ho letto scritti da lei, i protagonisti sono adolescenti. Questo romanzo è lo sviluppo del racconto “Riccioli rossi”, contenuto nella raccolta “Tu non mi conosci”.
Il titolo del romanzo originale è “My life as a rat”, con il gioco di significati topo-spia, che nella traduzione viene mantenuta.

È a forte impatto emotivo, per via degli abusi sui minori, degli abusi sessuali e della violenza.
Violet Rue Kerrigan, all’inizio del racconto, ha dodici anni ed è l’ultima di sette figli di una famiglia irlandese cattolica, dalle regole ferree. Una famiglia piena di contraddizioni e di storture, come tante famiglie: "Una famiglia somiglia a un albero gigantesco. Può anche essere gravemente danneggiato, magari sta cominciando a morire e marcire, ma le sue radici sono aggrovigliate sottoterra, inestricabilmente."

La Oates è brava a tirare la corda in modo che la tensione sia sempre al livello giusto, riuscendo ad assorbire completamente l’attenzione del lettore (e in questo forse è vero che non è poi così distante da Shirley Jackson come scrittrice). È una storia potente, dalle tinte scure e se si supera il disagio provato per tutte le scene di violenza descritte, si apprezza la bravura di questa scrittrice.

Una storia aperta alla possibilità di riscatto. E dopo tredici anni, alla fine Violet Rue fa ritorno a casa, quella che si è scelta “Adesso tocca a te voltare pagina. Abbandonare la tua vecchia vita ferita, il perverso orgoglio per il tuo volto segnato.”

Che questo sia l'augurio per tutti: "Tyrell mi ha anche detto Qualsiasi cosa succeda, Violet, avrà un senso. Un senso! Voglio crederci. Il mio desiderio è vivere una vita in cui le emozioni arrivino lentamente, come le nuvole in un giorno senza vento. Vedi la nuvola che si avvicina, contempli la sua bellezza, la guardi passare, la lasci andare. Non ti soffermi su quello che hai visto, non lo rimpiangi. Ti accontenti di sapere che una nuvola identica non arriverà più, a prescindere da quanto sarà bella, speciale. Non piangi la sua perdita."


[Questa scrittrice è una grandissima!]

[pelaio · Rating 5 out of 5]

Pero que bien escibe esta mujer, por Dios.
Me ha gustado mucho como todo lo que escribe Joyce.
No tiene ningún pero, de hecho creo que es un 5 estrellas sin reparos.
Recomendable de todas todas

[Amalia (◍•ᴗ•◍)❤ · Rating 4 out of 5]

Habría sido una lectura de 5⭐ si el final fuese distinto y menos "feliz" para mí gusto. No obstante, se trata de la complicada vida de Violet y del debate de razas. Muy recomendado.
.
It would have been a 5⭐ reading if the ending was different and less "happy" for my taste. However, it is about Violet's complicated life and the race debate. Highly recommended.

[Lectoralila · Rating 5 out of 5]

¡Delatora! ¡Rata! ¡Chivata! El trauma que te recorre el cuerpo te deja clavada en algún lugar de tu memoria infantil. No importa qué pase, no importa qué esté por venir. Eres culpable, hasta de tu propia existencia. Todo sería mejor sin ti. No entendiste lo que viste, no tenías edad para comprender nada, pero con los días, las semanas y los meses todo cobró sentido. Ellos, tus hermanos, habían matado a aquel chico. Y tú, solo oías trozos de conversaciones, que como piezas de un tetris macabro, se fueron solapando hasta hacerlo saltar todo por los aires. Con el tiempo aprenderías que todo aquello era racismo. Que si tus hermanos mataron a aquel chico afroamericano fue solo por el color de su piel. Que lo que tu madre hacía cada día por teléfono era vomitar excusas racistas que exoneraban a tus hermanos. Que lo que querían los Kerrigan no era la verdad, era que todas las pruebas dejasen de señalar a dos de los miembros de la familia. Y entonces te diste cuenta, a pesar de tu corta edad, de que tus hermanos eran los asesinos de Hadrian Johnson, un chico de la escuela que nunca se metía en líos. Se hizo evidente que todo South Niagara, llena de blancos racistas, lo culparían de su propia muerte. Y hablaste, dijiste muy poco, pero lo suficiente. ¡Maldita rata chivata! Tus hermanos están en la cárcel por TU culpa.

¡Repudiada! ¡Rata chivata! Te vas del hogar, aunque no quieras, porque todo se está desmoronando en casa de los Kerrigan, tu casa, por tu culpa. Te instalas con tus tíos sabiendo que tu familia no quiere saber nada de ti. Y creces, maduras, sabiéndote culpable de la destrucción de tu familia, de ser una traidora. Creces y empiezas el instituto, y un profesor de matemáticas se fija en ti, Mister Sandman. En ti y tu forma de ser, en tus trazos infantiles; en TI. Y te presta atención, y te invita a ir a su casa para que saques mejores notas en matemáticas. Tienes la suerte de que tu profesor quiera ayudarte, es un secreto entre vosotros. Unas clases particulares especiales para que saques muy buenas notas. Un secreto que esta vez NO vas a desvelar. Pase lo que pase. Y resolvéis problemas, juntos, en unos cuadernos matemáticos de Lewis Carrol.

Tu familia te repudia por rata delatora, tu profesor abusa de ti durante meses, porque, ¿qué otra cosa puedes hacer? Y aunque lo pillen, ¿qué más da? Jamás volverás a decirle nada a nadie. Ni sobre tu familia, ni sobre Mister Sandman, ni sobre nadie. Nunca.

“Delatora” de Joyce Carol Oates es uno de los mejores libros que he leído en mi vida. También uno de los libros más duros que he leído nunca. No es duro porque haya exposiciones gráficas. Lo es porque Joyce ha sabido capturar en esta obra el dolor, la culpa, el maltrato y la violencia en un personaje, Violet, que va creciendo a lo largo de todo el libro. Un personaje vulnerable a los depredadores de cualquier tipo. Y Oates lo cuenta con soltura, con una escritura magnífica, con un monólogo interior que va madurando y que nos ayudará a entender, como lectoras, como compañeras y como amigas, a los cuerpos que han pasado por situaciones de estrés postraumático.

Basta ya de escuchar mentiras. Basta de excusas. “Si no habló, es porque no sucedió”, “ Se lo tenía merecido”, “Las cosas de casa se quedan en casa”, “No es para tanto”, “No arruines la vida de unos chicos que tienen todo el futuro por delante”, “Eso pasó hace mucho tiempo”, “Deja el pasado atrás”, “Sigue adelante con tu vida”. Ardamos todas juntas, cogidas de la mano, y destruyamos el patriarcado. Os recomiendo muchísimo que leáis “Delatora”. Os recomiendo una barbaridad leer a Joyce Carol Oates, una escritora soberbia que en este libro denuncia con fiereza el racismo y también la misoginia, la violencia patriarcal, y el sexismo que nos aprisiona a todas.

[Martie Nees Record · Rating 4 out of 5]

Genre: Literary Family Drama
Publisher: HarperCollins Publishers
Publication Date: June 4, 2019

Oates’ latest novel is raw. It is hard to read, yet hard to put down. The story is fiercely written in an urgent tone to expose every nasty aspect of paternalism and male entitlement. We follow a 12-year-old girl from a working-class tight-knit Irish Catholic family. The setting is South Niagara, New York during the 1990s. Her life as a "rat" begins after she accidentally slips to her school nurse that her two eldest teen brothers were involved in a racially motivated attack that left a male African American honor student dead. Once her father’s favorite, she is now exiled to live with her aunt. Her dad has forbidden her mother and sisters to visit or even phone her. She is in a new home that doesn’t feel like home and friendless in a new school. Confused and in shock, she is easy pickings for a male teacher to sexually abuse. It seems fitting that her family begins a slow mental and financial decline after banishing their youngest child: A just punishment for deserting a child who did nothing wrong.

This storyline is nothing new for the acclaimed writer. Violence against women is a recurring theme in her work: “Do With Me What You Will,” 1973, “We Were the Mulvaneys,” 2002, “The Gravedigger's Daughter,” 2007, “Blonde: A Novel, 2009,” “The Sacrifice”, 2016. Just when you think Oates must have finally run dry on the subject she pulls off another winner. So why does Oates’ unwavering theme on the abuse of women keep working for her? Possibly, it is her willingness to unabashedly dive into the darkest cavity of the human psyche. And let’s face it—such tales are fascinating to read. More importantly, her work has been part of #MeToo decades before the movement existed. She forces the reader to acknowledge that her male protagonists seeking emotional release by abusing women are mentally ill men. And her female characters are vulnerable to exploitation and abuse because of a male-dominated society. Unlike other writers, Oates does not use violence in a sensational manner. She uses violence to echo the misogyny found in modern times, which is where her characters dwell. At least, that is what this reviewer thinks.

“Rat” has a lot in common with Oates’ 1996 novel, “We Were the Mulvaneys.” The Mulvaneys are another large Irish Catholic family living in upstate New York. This once-proud family also began a descent into financial ruin after a disgraced daughter was either raped or had consensual sex with a high-school boy. This reviewer preferred “Mulvaneys” over “Rat.” The litany of traumas inflicted upon the female protagonists in “Rat” can seem like they are one too many. This may be because the author expanded on what had been published as a short story a decade and more ago. Still, this doesn’t mean that “Rat” isn’t another literary success in the world of JCO. The characters are painfully real. Oates is begging the question, how does a child feel safe and loved in a universe with rules one doesn’t quite understand.

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[8stitches 9lives · Rating 4 out of 5]

It's always a big deal in my world when a new Joyce Carol Oates's book is published, and once again I felt the usual mix of trepidation and anticipation, but did it live up to the hype or was much of it hyperbole? Try the former and much to my delight!

Once I had gotten started that was it I was hooked and turning the pages feverishly. Sometimes it's the subtle thrillers that have the biggest impact; I definitely felt that was the case here where the creeping sense of unease almost leapt off the pages and hung in the air surrounding me in a stifling sense of claustrophobia. This is a masterfully crafted, nuanced thriller of rare sophistication and with Oates's trademark prose.

I still strongly believe, as do many other of her readers, that although a prolific writer and master of many of the written forms that she is highly underrated. Recommended to those who appreciate smooth, classy crime thrillers that are beautifully written and illustrates to stunning precision the reason why Oates has won so many prestigious awards for her literature. Unreservedly recommended. Many thanks to Fourth Estate for an ARC.

[Paula Mota · Rating 3 out of 5]

Só li três livros de Joyce Carol Oates e todos eles abordam a violência sexual. Se os outros dois eram óbvios no tema e diminutos no número de páginas, permitindo que o desconforto passasse depressa, este é demasiado longo para o que tem a contar, ligeiramente “kinky” e “voyeurista” e apanhou-me desprevenida. Violet Rue, de 12 anos, a bufa da história, filha mais nova de “white trash” americano, denuncia os irmãos que mataram um jovem negro à paulada, por simplesmente não aguentar mais a pressão de guardar segredo e, como tal, é expulsa da família. JCO não soube contar uma história sólida e sóbria só a partir dessa premissa, ou achou que uma jovem ter de viver ostracizada e com medo de represálias não era tragédia suficiente, pelo que teve de lhe juntar abusos sexuais em várias fases da vida. Eu compreendo e subscrevo a mensagem que a autora quer passar: a vida da mãe vale menos que a vida do pai, a vida da filha vale menos que a vida dos filhos, as mulheres são presas fáceis, as mulheres têm de engolir muitos sapos no dia-a-dia; ainda assim, não precisa de ma martelar na cabeça.

“So quickly it happened. You would never have expected this: a thrill of power. That the man could be assaulted in a way particular to him, his maleness. You realize: the man’s power over you is to intimidate you, to make you ashamed. But your power over him is the power of laughter. For it is very funny. The man’s penis, the flabby thighs of the middle-aged man, the stubby flesh between the thighs intended as a kind of weapon, but limp now, slack and defeated. Laughable.

[Xfi · Rating 3 out of 5]

Delatora, es el título en España, no es incorrecto, pero es mucho más adecuado y claro su título original: "My Life as a Rat".
Porque así es como se siente a lo largo de su vida la protagonista, como una rata, marcada por un acto semi-involuntario que condicionó su vida, su carácter, su futuro.
Un libro duro, una historia violenta, sobre el carácter de la familia. ¿La familia que se nos impone por haber nacido en ella es un valor absoluto que va más allá de los actos cometidos por ella?.
Historia muy americana, con su sociedad dividida en guetos, divisiones raciales, clanes, inmigrantes de primera, segunda y tercera. Un mundo cerrado, un modelo económico basado en la desigualdad y en el sálvese quien pueda y una familia opresiva que deja fuera al que incumple las normas, aunque un inocente muriera salvajemente asesinado.
No es una escritura convencional: El punto de vista cambia a menudo y sin aviso, a veces en primera persona, a veces en tercera, no hay una sintaxis clara en los diálogos, que hace que nos confundamos con lo que se cuenta, ¿es un dialogo o una reflexión de la protagonista? Todo este aparente desorden busca que comprendamos la sensación de desamparo, el trauma de la protagonista, privada de su voluntad y de toda capacidad de tomar las riendas de su vida hasta el punto de volverse un imán para todo tipo de acosadores y monstruos.

[Linda Galella · Rating 3 out of 5]

With thanks to the Little Free Library Shed in my development, I found this copy of MY LIFE AS A RAT, by the prolific and oft’ awarded, Joyce Carol Oates. I was hesitant because her books are often dark, disturbing and that’s not where I am right now. However, the very last line of the publisher blurb snagged me “…emerge from her long banishment as a ‘rat’ into a transformed life.” I’m a sucker for characters that struggle and grow, metamorphosing into their new best selves.

The story takes place in and around S. Niagara NY from 1991 - 2006. JCO paints the grey desolation of this geographical region with painful perfection. Too bad it didn’t extend to the Kerrigan family.

Violet Rue Kerrigan is twelve years old and the last of seven children in a blue collar, Irish Catholic Family. Boys are wild and favored, girls are invisible, relegated to household tasks and marriages to other Irish Catholic masters. Her father is king of his castle, a drunkard, highly functioning, and values his family and loyalty above all. Her mother is a doormat; performs as demanded by the King, shake out as needed, repeat. As the youngest and a “surprise”, Violet has always had a special place in her father’s heart, unlike the other girl children. She’s extremely naive and coddled which doesn’t serve her well when tragedy strikes - over and over again.

The older Kerrigan brothers are responsible for the death of a black student. Racial issues are rampant and the brothers are presented as being discriminated against, “because they’re white”, rather than having empathy for the murdered young man they beat to death, lied about and covered up. All the Kerrigans, their family and friends held to the code: loyalty above all. Well, there was one exception, but was it really her fault? The title of this book is no liar.

Violet has a miserable life after “the incident”. Shunned by her family and church and mistreated by school authorities, state officials, and most adults she encounters, her life is one trauma after another making the book a difficult read. I was so angry at the priest in the story, I had to put the book down for a full day; despicable human should be defrocked. Page after page, Violet endures her misery and keeps hoping her family will reach out for her, welcome her back.

MY LIFE AS A RAT reads more like My Life in a Never-ending Nightmare. The promise of a transformed life was hollow and barely a blip on the final few pages. While there are some passages with extraordinary descriptive prose, by and large, the content is dark and depressing, devoid of real hope and fraught with various forms of abuse and foul language; trigger warnings are abundant📚

2.5 stars rounded up in respect of the author’s body of work

[Cody · Rating 5 out of 5]

”My wish is to live a life in which emotions come slowly as clouds on a calm day. You see the approach, you contemplate the beauty of the clowd, you observe it passing, you let it go. You do not dwell upon what you have seen, you do not regret it. You are content to understand that the identical cloud will never come again, no matter how beautiful, unique. You do not weep at its loss.”

I considered not posting this review for a while yet, as this novel does not release until June 19, but I can’t wait. What Joyce Carol Oates has penned is another masterpiece, an enthralling and passionate character study that stands with her greatest works. In My Life as a Rat JCO does what she does best: examines the darkest parts of the human heart, and the consequences of acting on our worst impulses.

After being slightly disappointed by last year’s The Hazards of Time Travel, I was a bit wary of another “girl in exhile” story, but fear not! My Life as a Rat is what Hazards was not: bold, daring, full of sharp edges, teeming with life. After publishing for over fifty years, Oates still has a firm grasp on humanity — and what makes people tick. And we are all the better for it.

(I suppose this has been less of a review and more me fanboying all over the place, but what can I say?—BUY THIS! And prepare to feel, in the way the most excellent literary fiction makes you feel.)

My thanks to Ecco Books for the advance review copy. Much appreciated!

[Britta Böhler · Rating 3 out of 5]

JCO's writing was brilliant as always, and her take on the topics explored was really interesting (among other things: racism / family loyalty / gender & class) but sadly, the story never quite came together for me.

2.5* (rounded up)

[Catherine Lefay · Rating 4 out of 5]

Lo terminé anoche, pero quería dejar reposar mi opinión porque siento que viene todo de forma muy dispersa a mi mente, así perdón por lo que van a leer xD

Existen ciertos paralelismos con El Instinto debido a que es un relato bastante intimo y familiar de la protagonista mientras crece, la diferencia es que este libro se aleja de ese aire de misterio/horror psicológico y entra de lleno en dramas familiares, violencia, familias disfuncionales, abuso infantil, traumas, racismo, a lo mejor parece mucho, pero hay sutileza en lo directo de la narración, no se siente exagerado, sino que realista, algo que incluso le podría suceder al vecino.

Violet es la hija menor del Clan Kerrigan, una familia que no posee mucho pero se enorgullece de sus logros, un caos que se conforma por los padres, el abuelo paterno, cuatro hijos y tres hijas. Descendientes de inmigrantes irlandeses tienen una visión de la religión muy conservadora, así como del matrimonio, la crianza e incluso la familia. Violet es la hija favorita de su padre, y a pesar de que su familia no es perfecta los ama y pasa por alto todos los problemas en esta.

Si bien hay una serie de incidentes que implican a sus hermanos en casos sospechosos a medida que crecen, no es hasta que Violet se da cuenta que participaron en el asesinato de un joven afroamericano que esta comienza a ver a su familia con otros ojos, la negación, el encubrimiento, la cobertura de los medios, todo eso hace mella en la joven Violet que es la única que sabe donde sus hermanos escondieron el arma ofensiva. Todo cambia cuando uno de sus hermanos agrede a Violet, quien aterrorizada y adolorida confiesa todo su colegio.

Es acá cuando Violet es desterrada, su familia ya no quiere verla y esta toma como una penitencia justa tener que esperar por el perdón de todos a pesar de haber sido una niña de tan solo doce años aterrorizada, piensa en sus hermanos quienes son encerrados y siente que su vida no comenzará hasta que estos salgan libres. Los sentimientos de culpa y de odio a sí misma la acompañarán durante su adolescencia, desembocarán en traumas y dificultades para relacionarse.

Hay todo un tema en la actualidad con autores blancos escribiendo acerca de racismo, pero acá la autora nos pone en una posición más comprensible(? porque es la hermana menor de dos jóvenes que cometen un crimen de odio la que nos narra los eventos y cómo cambio su vida cuando decidió decir la verdad. Cómo su propia familia se volvió en contra de ella y desconocidos la catalogaron como traidora a 'su raza', porque hacer el bien no es tan fácil cuando hay gente que tiene ese concepto de 'familia primero' y 'en las buenas y en las malas', pero como justificativo para atrocidades.

Hay un componente implícito acerca de la violencia infantil que si bien jamás se trata directamente está ahí, el patriarca de la familia Kerrigan era violento con sus hijos varones, de las mujeres no esperaba nada por ser mujeres, pero a sus hijos los maltrataba y les mostró en cada palabra, gesto y comportamiento a ser misóginos. Aún así, a pesar del miedo a la desaprobación, al enojo y la violencia, tanto hijos como hijas querían complacer al padre, era un buen padre y brillaban bajo la aprobación de este.

Al crecer todos conservan secuelas de su crianza, los hijos violentos e irascibles, y Violet, nuestra protagonista, anteriormente la hija favorita del padre y luego exiliada, tiene una fijación con hombres mayores, y con lo que sea que estos crean que merezca. Salir de un entorno de violencia no siempre es la respuesta, a veces es el único lugar seguro porque es lo conocido, sanar por dentro y reconocer el dolor y los malos tratos es lo difícil cuando toda la vida los has justificados. La protagonista es una joven derrotada, pero que aún tiene una chispa de voluntad, de iniciativa.

Disfruté el libro, aunque es una historia trágica.

[Alison Hardtmann · Rating 5 out of 5]

When Violet Rue Kerrigan is twelve, she comes downstairs in the middle of the night to hear a confusing conversation between two of her older brothers. It will be a few days before she puts together the pieces of a conversation about fixing a car and hiding a baseball bat with the murder of a black high school student. The Kerrigans are a large Irish family with an unpredictable father, whose moods are carefully monitored by the rest of the family, especially by Violet's mother and sisters. Her brothers are rapidly becoming as domineering and prone to violence, although they still defer to their father. As their family, along with the working class Irish Catholic community as a whole, draw together to protect the boys, Violet is feeling increasingly unsafe around her brothers, a fear she shares with a teacher in a vulnerable moment. That moment will shatter Violet's life.

Joyce Carol Oates writes best when she's describing the experience of being a girl growing up in dysfunctional patriarchal households, of being unsafe and knowing that the very men that you love can easily do you great harm, and often do. With this novel, JCO is writing to her strengths and the result is a powerful and emotionally resonant novel about belonging, identity and resilience. I don't think I've ever read anything that so perfectly explains why an abused child will desperately try to return to the very environment that endangers her. JCO's singular writing style is perfectly suited to the voice of Violet Rue and while this isn't a novel that pulls any punches with what happens to children removed from whatever security they may have known and the battles Violet wages just to survive, she also tempers this all with grace notes and moments where Violet discovers that she's stronger than she thought she was.

This may well be my favorite work by this author.

[Chella · Rating 1 out of 5]

I feel the need to justify my rating.

A coworker today told me that Joyce Carol Oates is an "acquired taste," so I will certainly not be opposed to trying another book of hers in the future. This novel, however, was grating and choppy, disorganized and disorienting.

It flips jarringly back and forth from first and second person, sometimes adds in third. There is no clear rule for dialogue—sometimes quotation, sometimes italics, sometimes no break at all. I found it disjointed, fragmented.

Characters are insipid and completely unsympathetic. Jumbled up... the middle section felt like a separate book from the first and third sections. There is no growth in Violet, other than to say (at the very end) she was majoring in social work so that her life in exile wouldn’t be for "nothing."

Perhaps this novel tries too hard to speak on too many issues (family loyalty, sexual abuse, racial relations, etc.). Spreading itself too thin, it doesn't actually manage to comment on anything real at all.

[Nigeyb · Rating 3 out of 5]

I'd wanted to read a book by Joyce Carol Oates for sometime having heard great things about her. So, when I got the opportunity to read My Life as a Rat (2019), I grasped it with both hands.

My Life as a Rat follows Violet Rue Kerrigan who comes from a large, poor Irish-American family in Niagara, and whose father is a strict, angry, mercurial and intimidating presence, and whose mother is worn out from her seven children. Violet is exiled from her family after ratting on her brothers who are involved in a violent crime.

There's no disputing the book's power: it is compelling, well written and very immersive. However, the story is also unremittingly bleak, almost unbelievably so. It's not for the feint hearted. I raced through, but that was more to be shot of it than through any enjoyment.

3/5

[Gerard Pèrez Fontova · Rating 5 out of 5]

Otro 5 estrellas de Joyce Carol Oates. Escalofriante, cruda y adictiva con un ritmo frenético de indignación en cada página. ¿La locura entiende de razas? ¿Que entendemos por familia? 💯

[Kathryn in FL · Rating 5 out of 5]

A highly engaging read by a 5 star writer. This read as though it was a memoir rather than a work of fiction. The main character, Violet Rue comes across as truly experiencing her own betrayal by her family as though it happened. I found it very true to life.

The story from start to finish had such authenticity! If you like literary fiction this should be in you read soon pile.

[Leer En el Sur · Rating 4 out of 5]

Lo leí con el corazón en un puño, Oates es una narradora magnífica, una historia dura que te cala hasta lo mas hondo.