In this remarkable book, Welshons weaves together his own personal awakening with those of others he's counseled to bestow a deeply felt and exquisitely expressed primer on dealing with grief. We learn new ways to embrace our pain so that our hearts can open to feel joy. We discover how grieving gives us the unique opportunity to develop deeper and fuller life experiences. Written for people who have experienced any type of loss—whether through death, divorce, or disappointment—this compelling and memorable guide will take its place among the insightful works of grief management.
"A powerful read for all humans that delves into all aspects of grief from loss via death, to the loss of a job, relationship, or friendship and focuses on the positive opportunities that arise from the deep changes that inevitably all human beings face along their very delicate life journey... a MUST read!" ~Dulcinea, September 2, 2010
3.5 stars. My favorite books on grief are the Christian ones. Those, for me, are the most helpful and comforting. This one is pretty secular. Welshons dabbles a bit in Christianity, along with most other religions, at some point in this book. I can't tell if he is trying to appeal to/please everyone who may read the book regardless of their religious persuasion, or if he believes in all of them personally?
In spite of the author's eclectic, pluralistic/all-over-the-place belief (?) system, which I could never quite nail down, and which made me almost quit the book pretty early on, this book turned out to be quite encouraging and comforting in many ways. As it progressed, it seemed to get better and come together, and Welshons grew on me along with his unique and odd personality and style. I could really see him helping to put a grieving person at ease and providing comfort and support quite effectively. Reading some sections of this book felt like getting a warm hug.
Then I learned that he graduated from USF (Go Bulls!) and that endeared him to me even more.
This book is a shining example of why older titles on the subject of grief are valuable. Just because it's 10+ years old doesn't mean it has outlived its usefulness. Oftentimes, the older, classic titles are the best. Human nature and the way we grieve doesn't change, nor does the way we can be comforted as we experience it. If you are grieving, my heart goes out to you. May you find the peace and comfort you need. It gets better with time; promise. Recommended.
I had to push myself through the first half of this book. It consisted primarily of the author's personal experiences leading toward his work with death and dying. The second half contained more practical information and applicable techniques for those of us struggling to process profound grief. I am sure I will refer back to these sections many times in the years ahead.
Grieving the loss of a loved one or relationship is devastating. It's not something that can be "overcome" or "gotten over" and shame to those people who think so. Loss must to be lived with and always carried. The more love, the more grief...as I go through my own grief journey...several beloved in just 2.5 years - this book is a small comfort...
Welshons' book characterizes grief as a journey to one's self that one achieves by passing through the doors of sadness. Grief includes, but is not limited to, the mourning associated with death and takes the form of avoiding unpleasantness or disappointment. "Our entire culture," the author writes, "is built on maximizing pleasure through the systematic avoidance of grief" by avoiding, busying, distracting, and/or numbing ourselves. The energy we consume in avoidance detracts from our ability to embrace life's downs as well as its ups. Embracing tragedy, disappointment, and unpleasantness "can become the groundwork for tremendous growth and insight" in life. These opportunities--catalysts in disguise--provide a chance for "aliveness" "awareness," and "enthusiasm" to break through. Welshons, a student of Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, previously self-published this title and sold 17,000 copies; his clear, direct style will hook readers. Highly recommended.
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In this year's challenge of putting together integrative, effective grief support groups (from scratch), I came across this book. I appreciate that it is approachable and conversational in tone; but even more, I appreciate that the overall concept is that we never "get over" the loss of a loved one, but rather need to "lean in," embracing the change in our relationship, honoring and celebrating the memory of the person who has died, and developing a new way of being in light of all of that, in our own lives. The chapters from this that I've used with grief support group participants have been especially well-received and resonant with participants and their families.