Cultivate: A Grace-Filled Guide to Growing an Intentional Life

by Lara Casey

A guide to embracing imperfect progress and making what matters happen, little by little.


Women often feel like they have to have it all together in order to live a meaningful life. Instead they feel inadequate, overwhelmed, paralyzed by fear and insecurity, and are exhausted simply trying to figure out where to begin. “The secret to living a flourishing life isn’t in engineering the perfect circumstances or having it all together. The secret is in the small,” says author and speaker Lara Casey. “It’s easier than you think to cultivate what matters. It all starts with a tiny seed.”


Welcome to the journey of getting messy in the rich soil of possibility—embracing imperfect, grace-filled progress to grow a life of joy.


Written as part encouragement anthem and part practical guide, Cultivate equips women to uncover and take action on goals that simplify life. Lara's signature “goal gardening” steps release them from the pressure to achieve and gives them freedom to move from planning to planting. Readers will walk through each season, finding balance as they interact in fresh ways with their current life scenarios, with God, and in the communities where they are planted. "You don't have to be perfect; you just have to plant! As you open this book, you are making a decision to leave the dry soil behind. You will lean in . . . and unrush your life. And in the process you will unearth your purpose."


Special features include



Goal Gardening Steps
an eight-week Fruitful Goal Gardening Guide with questions for small groups
Gardening 101 to start your own real-life flower or vegetable garden
Find the joy and the freedom that comes in cultivating. Cultivate your faith. Don’t fertilize the fear. And watch how your life flourishes in the days ahead!

Genres: Nonfiction, Christian, Self Help, Faith, Personal Development, Christian Living, Spirituality

224 pages, Paperback

Published June 17, 2017

About the author

Hi! I’m Lara. A mom to three–one through the gift of adoption—a grateful wife, and a believer in the impossible! She is the Founder and CEO of Cultivate What Matters and created the PowerSheets® Goal Planner–an intentional goal-setting planner to help women break down their goals into manageable action steps and start living on purpose. She founded Southern Weddings magazine a decade ago and is the CEO of Cultivate What Matters. Lara is also the founder of the Making Things Happen movement, a nationally-acclaimed workshop that has been sold out for the last eight years and has toured over 40 cities. Lara frequently speaks on goal-setting, faith, mission-centered business. Lara authored three books through Thomas Nelson Publishers: Make it Happen: Surrender Your Fear, Take the Leap, Live on Purpose, Cultivate: A Grace-Filled Guide to Growing an Intentional Life, and her most recent children's book Gracie's Garden available now! Lara lives in Chapel Hill, North Carolina, with her husband, Ari, and their children, Grace, Joshua, and Sarah, and spends her free time in the garden...

Reviews

[Katie · Rating 2 out of 5]

I took a chance on this book as an audiobook because Audible included it in their Black Friday sale. And then I actually tracked down the Audible return process to give it back. The main problem was that I was listening to it while concurrently reading Hannah Anderson's Humble Roots. Both books come from a supposedly Christian perspective on dealing with overwhelm. Both books rely heavily on gardening metaphors. Only Humble Roots accurately diagnoses the, excuse the repetition, root of the problem. According to Cultivate the reason that I'm overwhelmed is that, oh poor me, I'm just too much of a perfectionist, taking on too much and trying too hard. What a well-intentioned way to be, if one that leads to burn-out. According to Humble Roots I'm a perfectionist who takes on too much and tries too hard because I'm proud. I'm trying to be God when only God can be God. I'm not acknowledging my limits, which are good things. And so because Humble Roots hits on my sin, it can point me to the Gospel and to the cure. Cultivate, or as far as I got into it, could only give me generalized promises that God would work in my life. As true as that is, it's not going to get to the true problem. And since I'm trying to be intentional about my life here, I decided to stick with the book that would illuminate problem and solution, not the cutesy one that would try and make me feel better. I recommend you do the same.

[Donna · Rating 3 out of 5]

I liked the idea of this book. I also loved, loved all the gardening references...(I'm big on gardening and I could relate to those analogies.) In that way, this book spoke my language. But this felt more like a talk I'd hear in church, and less like a book.

This book is very positive and it brings in how important faith is in living a peaceful life. The author also uses scriptures. It was nice, but again, it felt more like a talk I'd hear in church. So 3 stars, mostly for the how successful the gardening theme worked with her ideas.

[Rebekah · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was my second time reading through this book.... I still love it, but I knocked off a star because I wish the book had more actionable steps. Sure, it's very inspiring, but I would have liked more "how-to".

With that said, I do love Lara's writing style. Since we've grown things or at least had a garden a couple times, I enjoy the gardening analogies a lot. Many of the chapters hit home and mentioned unique things I've been working through! It was great timing. ❤️

[Scout Collins · Rating 2 out of 5]

This book should really be called Cultivate: A God-Filled Guide to Growing a 'Prayerful' Life

Like her other book, Cultivate is smack-full of 'God', 'prayer', and tons of Bible quotes. As a non-Christian this was completely unappealing and became irritating. Casey seems to view anyone who isn't a devoted Christian a charity case who needs to 'find God'. She seems to only surround herself with praying friends, her family is religious and she converted her husband too.

Apart from the religious aspects, the book was okay. Nothing new; "get off your phone, spend time with people, be grateful, be religious, and buy my product that will help you with all of this!"

She turned her metaphor of a garden representing life into a full book, with snippets from her life about her daughter mainly and her gardening. This part was not bad. The incessant God advice was so annoying that it made me doc 2-3 stars though.

Examples of things to cultivate
- A healthier lifestyle
- A stronger marriage
- Intentional connections with family
- Joy in your children
- Contentment in what you have
- Learning/education
- A new business venture
- Being more present
- Deeper friendships
- Confidence in your life path
- Creativity
- Work that allows you to use your gifts
- A life-giving home with open doors for hospitality
- Balance and rest
(Religious points removed)

Of course every book by this author features the conversion to Christianity of someone in her family - in Make It Happen and now in Cultivate.
"I kept thinking of the big picture: if I could encourage my dad and share God's love with him, maybe he would want to know God too. I can't take credit for any of this change (Oh really?!), but God used my weekly letter writing to open my dad's heart. He started asking Ari and me about our faith..." (Casey, 135).

Things I Didn't Like
Repetition of the modified word "season" - it got annoying fast

"There is no formula. There is no one "right" way to tend and grow an intentional life. You simply do what God tells you to do." (Casey, 146). a), why did I pick up this book to have that kind of an answer, and b), how does God tell you what to do? Do you hear voices in your head? Sounds kinda crazy.

"My tending list in the season after I experienced that heart pain was pretty simple:
- Pray
- Read the bible" (Casey, 147).
>> Wow, if only reading the Bible could solve all your problems. It can't though. And when reading the Bible, did you happen to read some of the bad parts? The parts that encourage murder, rape, abuse, etc.? Hmm.....

Everything wrong with this quote:
"Complaints can reveal self-reliance instead of God-reliance. We often complain to control, to fix, and to express our distrust and discontent. Complaints can sometimes be our way of saying to God, I do not believe You are real. That right there hits me hard. But there's hope, and there's grace. Grace upon grace." (Casey, 166-167).

Things I Liked
- Story about Walter the Mailman and Grace (author's daughter). Cute.
- Cover design. From a design standpoint, this book would get a 4.5 from me!
- Ideas about connection with others: Ask your neighbour their name (repeat it back to them if you can't remember), Tell a friend you want to grow in friendship with them, Leave an encouraging note for your friend, Send a postcard, Don't think and let go of nice thoughts - text or email them, Invite your friend over, Send a message after you meet and say you were glad you spent time together, Leave notes of encouragement for a friend, "Grab a box of popsicles, a watermelon, or a basket of peaches and spend intentional time telling your friend all the things you are proud of her for." (Casey, 192), Celebrate "friend-iversaries"
- This quote: "Ask someone to come over, even if your house is a mess. I don't know about you, but I feel so relieved when I go to someone's house that is perfectly imperfect like mine!" (Casey, 197).

I would recommend this to...
a) Pious Christians
b) People who like gardening
c) People who can get over the 50% religious content in this book

I would not recommend this to...
a) people who aren't Christian, who don't enjoy reading many Bible quotes and hearing about Jesus

[Danica · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book was everything I needed this year. I read it over the space of about 4 months (I used it as my “Sunday” book) and each time I picked it up I needed that particular message so badly. I don’t think it’s one I would read quickly because It would be a little too much and not allow for time to digest what was standing out.

[Aria · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was good! Not 100% about her theology or her view of the Will of God, but still, a really good read.

[Jessi Payne · Rating 5 out of 5]

More gardening analogies than you’ll know what to do with. Each one is super beautiful in its own way.

[Annie · Rating 2 out of 5]

I don't know what it was about this book, but I just could not get into it. Maybe it was all the gardening references that I just can't relate to in any way, or maybe it was the cheesy, lackluster writing style-- either way, I just couldn't wait for this book to be over.

That being said, I would recommend this book to anyone who is feeling a little bogged down with life, a little overwhelmed, a little lost on their path. I think this book could really be helpful to someone else, as there are journaling prompts throughout the book that make it easy to reflect. This one just wasn't for me.

[Amory Skaggs · Rating 5 out of 5]

Cultivate is such a beautiful book! Lara is incredibly real and hopeful in her story that she weaves throughout her gardening metaphors. This timely book is about going against the culture that is normal and taking the time to really tend to things that matter. Gardens don't happen over night and she reminds us that a life worth living doesn't either. It takes time, energy, persistence, water, sun, and just a little bit of trust that something is happening under the surface to grow a garden, and our lives are the same. It's hard to remember that things are happening under the surface, but this book is such a beautiful reminder.
I especially loved the stories from the "Grace from the Garden" sections!
I received an advanced copy of the book as a part of the book launch team.
I received this book in exchange for my review from the publisher. The opinions I have expressed are my own.

Disclaimer: This book was provided by the publisher. The reviewer was under no obligation to offer a positive review.

[Kristin Jack · Rating 5 out of 5]

Having followed Lara Casey on social media for two years and love how joyful she always is regardless of circumstances. I love the imagery of gardening through life having grown up in the garden with my own dad. I’m inspired to really cultivate what matters in my own life more. I love using the Powersheets from her shop and recommend this book to anyone feeling like they are ready to give up their badge of busy and live life more fully.

[Lisa Diephouse · Rating 5 out of 5]

Exactly what my heart needed 💓

[Andrea Engfer · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved this book so much and was sad when I was finished. Lara Casey talks about cultivating a life that matters, and her gardening references are great analogies to the points she is making. I’ve since discovered her Write the Word devotional journals and am going through one right now. I’m a big fan of hers now!

[Natalie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Definitely one of the best and most personally helpful contemporary Christian nonfiction books I’ve read. Definitely recommend to anyone struggling with feeling lost in life, purposeless, or struggling to move forward.

[Jenny Fleming · Rating 5 out of 5]

Have you noticed how slowly plants grow? I can put a bulb in the ground, at the specified depth, and it won’t appear for months. When the shoots do come up, and slowly emerge and unfurl, I am so excited to see it take shape and change; culminating with a beautiful bud that expands into a flower. In Lara Casey’s book Cultivate, she walks us through this Christian life in the same terms. First, we dig into the dirt. In fact, she says “the magic is in the dirt”. What is dirt to most of us? It’s messy, smelly, and unpredictable (watch out or an earthworm might jump out). But dirt is indeed a miraculous substance, full of minerals and composted matter. Our lives are messy and unpredictable just like dirt. But the mess of our lives is where God works. We need to let him dig up our lives, placing his Word in our hearts; putting the Gospel ‘s good news in the forefront of our minds. And only then can we be cultivated and prepared to be used for the good works he has set before us. Cultivation can be rigorous, but God does the work. He gently plants us in the right places, he then fertilizes us and waters us with His water that will never run dry or leave us thirsty. We believe his Word, and grow (like a plant) in grace, thus expressing His grace to ourselves over and over, along with those around us. Casey ends her book encouraging readers to rejoice in the fruit that results from the patient labor of our forever-loving God. We might not see the fruit for months, or years, or decades. It can take fruit trees years to finally produce. And our lives on this side of Heaven are the same way. There is freedom in trusting God with our lives and the things “planted” in our path. Rejoice that growth takes time. The Lord goes before us every step of the way; tilling up the dirt and cultivating it according to his sovereign plan for each of our lives.

[Leah Good · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really, really enjoyed this book. When I started listening to it, I was a little surprised to find the book centers around drawing life lessons from gardening. Once I adjusted to that, I thought it was going to be a lot of repetition of typical Christian living encouragements. That expectation wasn't entirely wrong. I didn't necessarily glean concepts that were brand new to me. However, the authors way of seeing the world through the eyes of a gardener--seeing the beauty and opportunities of everyday life--bought tears to my eyes many times throughout the book.

The one thing I thing I feel is important to recognize in this book is that the author uses the term "imperfect" quite liberally in reference to people and their lives. At one point she said that we are beautiful and imperfectly made, and I was like, "Um, no. That's not what Psalm 139:14 says, either directly or through implication. God doesn't make mistakes when he makes us. I think what she means, though, is that we aren't made to fit a cultural image of perfection. By imperfect she seems to mean that we don't always look the way, act the way, or build our lives in the way the people around us think we should. Which is different than accepting or embracing a failure to measure up to God's standards--even though we are imperfect there, it's not something to be glorified. Just think that's worth clarifying going into the book.

Most of my favorite Christian "self-help" books stick with me because they challenge me. This one was as uplifting as it was challenging. I finished it with a reminder to embrace seasons of life instead of enduring them, to look for the beauty in what I'm tempted to be annoyed by, and to make decisions that allow me to be fully present in each thing I say yes to.

If you enjoyed The Best Yes, you'll likely enjoy Cultivate as well.

[Elena · Rating 5 out of 5]

I have been using Lara Casey's goal-setting guide since 2014 and I am not overstating when I say that it revolutionized the way I look at both short and long-term goals. I love her Instagram feed, where she shares about juggling marriage, motherhood, her career, and her ever-growing garden. Whether in her books, blog, or IG, she is vulnerable, humble, and honest about her past struggles with perfectionism, a need for control, and her faith journey, pointing to Jesus and His grace. In Cultivate, she uses a plethora of garden analogies to uncover what grace-filled intentional living looks like. She encourages embracing our imperfections; letting go of burdensome pressures; and choosing to plan and plant and harvest what is meaningful in our relationships with God, those around us, and our own selves. The book is divided into two parts: Prepare Your Garden and Dig In. Every chapter has actionable prompts for discussion as well as a ten-week discussion guide at the back of the book, so the reader has practical application of all the principles and wisdom shared by Casey. Each chapter subtitle includes a lie and a truth that will be the focus of that chapter. For example, chapter eight is on harvesting contentment. The lie is that "I will be content when I have it all". The truth is that "I will be content when I live grateful". Instead of rushing through it, I savored the words by journaling what stuck out to me as well as my answers to the discussion guide questions. I also am participating in the Cultivate Book Club on Facebook, where we read and discuss a chapter every week. I will most definitely look back at the book and my journaled notes as I continue my journey in living intentionally and cultivating goals that aren't just a checklist of to-do but rather steps towards living on purpose a life that is rooted in the grace of Jesus.

[Emily · Rating 5 out of 5]

Reading this is like having a cup of coffee with Lara--really. It's so warm and encouraging. Lara has a gift for inspiring people to do what really matters in their lives, and Cultivate is an excellent follow-up to her first book, Make It Happen, in this regard. Make it Happen helped me define things I wanted to do, and goals I wanted to set--Cultivate will help me actually see those goals through, during times when I'm frustrated or want to give up on my whys.

[Leslie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Having recently discovered Casey's website, I wanted to read her book. I enjoyed the gardening imagery and metaphor throughout. A good reminder that while we can choose and cultivate, we do not control our lives. Young moms in particular will enjoy.

[Laura Simpson · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book gave me a lot to think about. The writing was simple, which I appreciated since I was doing so much “digging” into my own thoughts and whether or not they’re helping me cultivate a life I want to live. I appreciate that I could come back to this book several times and find new ways of approaching growing a grace-filled life.

[Haze]

I read the first chapter of the book and was intrigued; there were parts that I resonated with although I'm not a Christian. I'm usually wary of too much religious praise in self-improvement books, but I thought I'd take a chance. I quickly lost interest, unfortunately, so I'm just going to give this a pass.

[Natalie Herr · Rating 4 out of 5]

Enjoyed this reminder that life takes cultivating! Growth takes time. Small steps get us where we want to go. The Lord goes before us and gives the growth! A good read heading into a new year.

[Ellerie Saucer · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a great read! I really enjoyed the author's perspective. It did get a little repetitive toward the end.

[Heather Laaman · Rating 5 out of 5]

I can't say enough good things about this book. I can't say I'm a big self help person, but I think I just read this at a perfect time.

[Jess · Rating 5 out of 5]

Such a moving and motivating book to read. I was reading this along with my best friend and many others for the Cultivate book club with Lara Casy and her team at Cultivate What Matters. It was a treat to savor each chapter and really dwell on the words. Many many beautiful quotes highlighted and nuggets of wisdom to soak into my heart. Truly inspiring.

[Stephanie Taylor · Rating 4 out of 5]

My last book of 2018 and a fantastic way to kick off the new year!

[Nana · Rating 5 out of 5]

Embrace the season you're in.

[Kristi Clemow · Rating 2 out of 5]

The writing was good - I liked her stories and how she wrote - but the topic didn't speak to me and it was a very repetitive. Nothing "wrong" per se with it - just not in the same season of life

[Kimberley · Rating 2 out of 5]

Just plain boring

[Allison Waggoner · Rating 5 out of 5]

Perfect spring read, want to read again.

[Jodi Howard · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book surprised me. I started and restarted it a couple times because it had a bit too much "fluff" for me. Kind of self helpy. But when I pushed through a few chapters there were great questions sprinkled throughout to reflect on. It was what I needed for this season... Slow, intentional decisions can build a life and a legacy centered on the Lord. Good reminders!