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Reason Number One
All Taylor Lassau wants is to escape his past. He’s been kicked out of his house, knocked around by an abusive boyfriend, and defined by a heart condition for far too long. So an acceptance letter from a prestigious college is a perfect opportunity to start over, even if it means being away from the one person in the world he has on his side, his twin sister, Aela.
All he has to do is be normal, which in Taylor’s book, means acting one hundred percent straight. Too bad that becomes one hundred percent impossible when he meets his roommate’s friend, Calis Schrader, who has a major flirting problem. Especially with Taylor. Calis and his friends force Taylor to question every truth he’s accepted about himself and the world him around him.
As Taylor struggles to reconcile his past with his future, he finds himself evaluating what it means to be normal, what it means to be ruined, and what it actually means to be gay.
All he has to do is be normal, which in Taylor’s book, means acting one hundred percent straight. Too bad that becomes one hundred percent impossible when he meets his roommate’s friend, Calis Schrader, who has a major flirting problem. Especially with Taylor. Calis and his friends force Taylor to question every truth he’s accepted about himself and the world him around him.
As Taylor struggles to reconcile his past with his future, he finds himself evaluating what it means to be normal, what it means to be ruined, and what it actually means to be gay.
254 pages, Kindle Edition
First published September 23, 2016
20 people are currently reading
523 people want to read
About the author
Briston Brooks
1 book26 followersBriston Brooks is a perpetually anxious mess of a person. She's bi and married to a wonderful husband, with two children (fine, cats.) She daylights as a chronically miserable IT employee, but she spends most of her time obsessing over personality quizzes, falling in love with diverse books, fidgeting, and watching shows on Netflix non-linearly (mainly Grey's Anatomy.) She blames ADHD for this. She also occasionally writes and is the author of REASON NUMBER ONE.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 71 reviews
July 3, 2017
4.5 stars
I received this book for free in exchange for an honest review.
TW: cutting, homophobia, domestic violence, and rape
I've gotta say, before this, I gave up on reading self-published books because most of them were so unbearable to read since they lacked so much editing. I was slightly hesitant going into this because of that, but one of my really good friends recommended this to me on the basis that her friend wrote it and it was actually really good, so I had faith. And wow.
This book is powerful. And exactly the type of story I love. What it lacks in wobbly structure, it makes up for with your investment in the characters and the story. It's a book about self-love and friendship and sexual identity and recovery. And it's done so realistically.
Hands down, the best thing about this book is the characters. I compare them to The Raven Boys because it's that exact type of character development in which you get to know them by the tiny details, and it builds their character from the ground up. I'm a sucker for noticing details, and making a character feel like they're in the flesh by attributing flaws to them. This book was a masterpiece at doing that.
The one downfall is that since it is self-published, there are some parts that are clunky because I feel like they could use some work. Particularly, the dialogue could be a bit jarring because everyone seems to sputter or repeat themselves a lot. The villain/ex-boyfriend felt a bit two-demensional for reasons I won't spoil, but I felt like his issues could have been explored or explained better and less in-your-face. Additionally, I wished the college setting was more fleshed out and we could have seen Taylor in his classes or the dining hall, and also I think the changing of seasons could have been more apparent.
But as you can see, my issues with it are minor. This book made me laugh, this book made me cry. I hope you all decide to try it and support my friend!! (i'm only slightly biased because briston is awesome and she deserves all the love)
I received this book for free in exchange for an honest review.
TW: cutting, homophobia, domestic violence, and rape
I've gotta say, before this, I gave up on reading self-published books because most of them were so unbearable to read since they lacked so much editing. I was slightly hesitant going into this because of that, but one of my really good friends recommended this to me on the basis that her friend wrote it and it was actually really good, so I had faith. And wow.
This book is powerful. And exactly the type of story I love. What it lacks in wobbly structure, it makes up for with your investment in the characters and the story. It's a book about self-love and friendship and sexual identity and recovery. And it's done so realistically.
Hands down, the best thing about this book is the characters. I compare them to The Raven Boys because it's that exact type of character development in which you get to know them by the tiny details, and it builds their character from the ground up. I'm a sucker for noticing details, and making a character feel like they're in the flesh by attributing flaws to them. This book was a masterpiece at doing that.
The one downfall is that since it is self-published, there are some parts that are clunky because I feel like they could use some work. Particularly, the dialogue could be a bit jarring because everyone seems to sputter or repeat themselves a lot. The villain/ex-boyfriend felt a bit two-demensional for reasons I won't spoil, but I felt like his issues could have been explored or explained better and less in-your-face. Additionally, I wished the college setting was more fleshed out and we could have seen Taylor in his classes or the dining hall, and also I think the changing of seasons could have been more apparent.
But as you can see, my issues with it are minor. This book made me laugh, this book made me cry. I hope you all decide to try it and support my friend!! (i'm only slightly biased because briston is awesome and she deserves all the love)
March 1, 2017
No sé muy bien qué pensar de este libro. No soy nada fan de la narrativa con el chico homosexual echado de casa siendo adolescente, habiendo sufrido abusos repetidamente, me parece que hay que hacerlo muy muy bien para no caer en el dramatismo fácil y los estereotipos. Y aquí, a pesar de sufrir con Taylor, no he podido dejar de pensar toda la lectura que estaba leyendo lo que había leído ya mil veces, recurriendo a lo mismo de siempre en la literatura LGBT+ sin que esté hecho de forma especialmente bien. Cierto es que sientes empatía con Taylor, y que sabes que es la realidad de muchos chicos, pero todo se ve como fácil, fácil, fácil, y a pesar de entender por lo que está pasando hay momentos en que es verdaderamente agotador estar en la cabeza de Taylor. Y a pesar de pensar que qué suerte tiene de contar con nuevos amigos y de enamorarse de Calis y que sea recíproco, se siente otra vez todo como muy fácil, fácil, fácil. Todo ello culminado con un final muy poco creíble y con el deseo que se mencione, y no se hace, una terapia para Taylor, muy necesaria en estos casos.
Por edad, los chicos están en el College, quizás debería haberlo puesto como New Adult, pero la voz de Taylor y sus comportamientos son muy YA para ello.
Le voy a poner tres estrellas, pero no muy convencida, fundamentalmente lo hago porque los protagonistas me han gustado, tanto los principales, como los secundarios, que son muy buenos.
Por edad, los chicos están en el College, quizás debería haberlo puesto como New Adult, pero la voz de Taylor y sus comportamientos son muy YA para ello.
Le voy a poner tres estrellas, pero no muy convencida, fundamentalmente lo hago porque los protagonistas me han gustado, tanto los principales, como los secundarios, que son muy buenos.
April 27, 2020
rep: gay Native American mc with a heart condition, bi li, side Black character, side Japanese character, side Native American character
tw: sexual assault, physical assault, blood, talk of past rape, abuse, internalized homophobia
a bit over the top at times but aren't all gays dramatic ??
edit: okay u know what, i changed my mind. it's not overdramatic. it's just that the mc is a traumatized gay boy. & it's actually written very convincingly.
tw: sexual assault, physical assault, blood, talk of past rape, abuse, internalized homophobia
a bit over the top at times but aren't all gays dramatic ??
edit: okay u know what, i changed my mind. it's not overdramatic. it's just that the mc is a traumatized gay boy. & it's actually written very convincingly.
August 14, 2017
3.5 Stars
Reason Number One was a sweet surprise!
Taylor Lassau is hoping for a fresh start in college. All Taylor wants is to get lost in his studies and forget about being gay. He wants to forget about his mother throwing him out and his abusive boyfriend. But right away he meets a group of friends that changes everything. A group of friends that includes Calis Schrader. *cue the music and spotlight* :D
“His voice wrapped around me, and he smiled. Bright blue-green settled in his eyes. Dynamite detonated in my chest. Roguish and radiant and ridiculous. Help.”
Taylor’s voice and reactions to Calis were hilarious and heartbreaking and sweet. Whenever Calis entered the room, Taylor turned into this adorable staring, stuttering, blinking puddle of “aww”. Haha…It was too cute. I loved Briston Brooks’ descriptions of Taylor’s energy. Like when he spots Calis….“All my muscles went to the task of not choking on my own saliva.” Or here when he’s tired…”My arms and legs wobbled like a late-game jenga tower.” OH! This was one my favorites after Taylor finds a job….”I thought about leaping into the air, high-fiving a bookshelf.” Haha….
The words are simple, but oh-so perfect in capturing the moment and character. All of the characters and emotions actually! I adored Calis and Taylor’s time on the page. They were sweet and romantic from the get go. The catching him before he falls, carrying his books, buying him dinner, and GAH!...the . I loved it all! The “Are we more than friends?” angst, denial, and miscommunication went on a bit long and culminated into a disappointing dare and bet scenario that felt unbelievable to me though. I mean it was sexy! Don’t get me wrong. But the angst at that point wasn’t even frustrating—it was unbelievable. There were too many obvious signs and feelings for me to just go with it at that point. I loved the long looks, touches, and “almosts”, but it all lasted one holiday too many in my opinion. I wanted to slap ‘em both upside the head!! :D
Anyway…adding to the fun is a whole group of friends. Raphael, Lee, Katt, Calis, Taylor and Naoko combine to make a group dynamic that is so much fun to be around and in. You can feel how much they all care about each other. They love and support each other with jabs and jokes. They made me laugh and think and “aww” all the way through. And wish! I hope we get to see more from the gang. A Lee and Katt story could be fun.
I know I’m failing at capturing the sweetness of this book, but it’s in there. One of my favorite parts of this book was coming across moments packed with huge emotion and thought. The emotion snuck up on me to be honest. All of a sudden the words would jab at my heart and I’d find myself uttering “yeah, yeah, I know what you mean".
“I had to stop waiting for something to happen. I had to happen all on my own. I had to actually start over, put the past in the past, and do something about the present.”
Reason Number One was not perfect. I have a short list of things I could complain about—like the epilogue!!—but I won’t…Haha. I swear I won’t! It’s a cute story about facing your past and accepting who you are and falling in love all at the same time. A story full of caring, cigarettes, Risk games, apple pie, and warm hugs. And maybe, just maybe a reason to quit smoking. :)
Recommended.
July 1, 2017
5 starring my own book because that's who I am as a person.
December 14, 2017
1.75 stars
Unremarkable, overdramatic, and the characters and plot are quickly forgotten and unassuming --so much so that the main characters felt like secondary ones. Honestly, I wish my review was longer but I couldn't tell you a single thing that I remember about this book despite having finished it only last night, which is probably a bad thing.
1.75 stars because although the plot was whatever, for a self-published author, Briston Brook's writing is rather good and her sentences usually flowed nicely.
Unremarkable, overdramatic, and the characters and plot are quickly forgotten and unassuming --so much so that the main characters felt like secondary ones. Honestly, I wish my review was longer but I couldn't tell you a single thing that I remember about this book despite having finished it only last night, which is probably a bad thing.
1.75 stars because although the plot was whatever, for a self-published author, Briston Brook's writing is rather good and her sentences usually flowed nicely.
April 27, 2020
Rep: Native American gay mc with a heart condition, bi li, Black side character, Japanese side character, Native American side character
CWs: past emotional abuse
CWs: past emotional abuse
July 7, 2017
A billion stars!! I want goodreads to have more than five stars just so I can give this book what it deserves!! God, I loved this so much. I have no words. I started this last night--stayed up way too late reading, picked it up as soon as I woke up, read as much as I could at work, then finished it when I got home. I would have read it in one sitting if that had been possible for me today.
Taylor was literally the cutest thing ever. All stuttering and adorable. Calis was a dreamboat. And they were just perfect together. I cannot come up with proper words to describe my love for them. (And I usually like for there to be a bit of sexy times in a book *wink wink* but I was glad this book didn't have a sex scene. It made a lot of sense that they never did anything sexual and once I realized they weren't going to I kind of let out a sigh of relief. Which is very unusual for me! Haha!)
I seriously loved all the characters immensely. Except Rhett. Obviously. Ew. But I wanted more of Lee and I really wanted to know what was up with him and Katt! I just wanted to smack him upside the head a bit! But alas, I will never know the outcome. But that's ok, everything about it was still incredibly perfect.
This book also made me really really really want apple pie. Damn you, Calis Schrader!
I will definitely be rereading this sometime in the near future. I would probably pick it up again immediately if I didn't have some other things I desperately need to get further into.
I don't usually write reviews, but I just had to put down some thoughts (even though they are probably nonsensical) because I loved this book soooooooooooooooooooo much!
READ IT!! Read it, now! Go buy it right this second! You won't regret it. Pinky promise.
Taylor was literally the cutest thing ever. All stuttering and adorable. Calis was a dreamboat. And they were just perfect together. I cannot come up with proper words to describe my love for them. (And I usually like for there to be a bit of sexy times in a book *wink wink* but I was glad this book didn't have a sex scene. It made a lot of sense that they never did anything sexual and once I realized they weren't going to I kind of let out a sigh of relief. Which is very unusual for me! Haha!)
I seriously loved all the characters immensely. Except Rhett. Obviously. Ew. But I wanted more of Lee and I really wanted to know what was up with him and Katt! I just wanted to smack him upside the head a bit! But alas, I will never know the outcome. But that's ok, everything about it was still incredibly perfect.
This book also made me really really really want apple pie. Damn you, Calis Schrader!
I will definitely be rereading this sometime in the near future. I would probably pick it up again immediately if I didn't have some other things I desperately need to get further into.
I don't usually write reviews, but I just had to put down some thoughts (even though they are probably nonsensical) because I loved this book soooooooooooooooooooo much!
READ IT!! Read it, now! Go buy it right this second! You won't regret it. Pinky promise.
October 28, 2016
I really enjoyed this one.
I wish that when the 2 MCs spoke to each other it was actually full sentences but ya really enjoyed it.
I wish that when the 2 MCs spoke to each other it was actually full sentences but ya really enjoyed it.
April 9, 2020
If you like found family, look no further.
The words took something from me. I reached to get it back, but couldn't.
Taylor starts college with a whole bunch of baggage. He's escaped an abusive boyfriend and his mom has disowned him for being gay.
Luckily, he gets assigned to be roommates with Raphael who immediately takes him under his wing and brings Taylor into his group of friends.
Taylor is such a sweet guy who deserved better and doesn't quite know what to do with what life has given him. He is traumatized and his past catches up with him.
"You look at someone and your heart changes colors. You don't talk yourself into loving someone."
Calis Shrader is a wonderful love interest. He's intriguing, confusing and by the end of the book his behaviour forces me to tell you that he's probably perfect. He definitely doesn't start out that way, he was a bit lost himself but goodness does he find himself.
"As a philosophy major, I can assure you reality never brings people down any further than they need to come."
Seeing Taylor make friends and become a bit more himself had my heart warm, especially when he was being so very blind because he simply could not believe that anyone could love him.
"Unremarkab- look, you're not unremarkable. Everything about you is like waking up. You are like looking directly into the sun. I close my eyes and you're still there. All the time."
I loved Raphael and Lee and all the unquestionable friendships.
There is a fair bit of angst and personally, I think this book would have been amazing without Rhett (the ex boyfriend) even existing.
TW: homophobia, domestic violence, mentions of rape, mentions self-harm
I shrugged, "Taking care of me is a lot of work."
I looked at his eyes again, fire doused in an endless ocean of deep, penetrating blue.
"I bet you'd be worth it."
The words took something from me. I reached to get it back, but couldn't.
Taylor starts college with a whole bunch of baggage. He's escaped an abusive boyfriend and his mom has disowned him for being gay.
Luckily, he gets assigned to be roommates with Raphael who immediately takes him under his wing and brings Taylor into his group of friends.
Taylor is such a sweet guy who deserved better and doesn't quite know what to do with what life has given him. He is traumatized and his past catches up with him.
"You look at someone and your heart changes colors. You don't talk yourself into loving someone."
Calis Shrader is a wonderful love interest. He's intriguing, confusing and by the end of the book his behaviour forces me to tell you that he's probably perfect. He definitely doesn't start out that way, he was a bit lost himself but goodness does he find himself.
"As a philosophy major, I can assure you reality never brings people down any further than they need to come."
Seeing Taylor make friends and become a bit more himself had my heart warm, especially when he was being so very blind because he simply could not believe that anyone could love him.
"Unremarkab- look, you're not unremarkable. Everything about you is like waking up. You are like looking directly into the sun. I close my eyes and you're still there. All the time."
I loved Raphael and Lee and all the unquestionable friendships.
There is a fair bit of angst and personally, I think this book would have been amazing without Rhett (the ex boyfriend) even existing.
TW: homophobia, domestic violence, mentions of rape, mentions self-harm
I shrugged, "Taking care of me is a lot of work."
I looked at his eyes again, fire doused in an endless ocean of deep, penetrating blue.
"I bet you'd be worth it."
October 15, 2016
It was sort of a mess but an enjoyable one for the most part. I liked all the secondary characters but Taylor was such a Mary Sue. I'm glad he finally pulled his head out his ass.
July 31, 2018
I really, really enjoyed this. It was an addictive read with great characters and an effective smattering of humour tossed in amongst the angst. For a while, I thought this could easy be a five-star read for me. Unfortunately, Taylor's unrelenting over-reactions (all the electricity and lightning and explosions cracking through him with every slight touch or look from Calis) and his complete and utter denseness (I mean, come on dude! Calis wasn't being subtle) did start to grate on me a fair bit.
Loved how supportive Taylor's new-found friends were, though, and Calis was a total sweetheart. The story melted me to goo quite a few times and after all Taylor had been through, I could understand his reluctance to open up (even as it frustrated the hell out of me).
Loved how supportive Taylor's new-found friends were, though, and Calis was a total sweetheart. The story melted me to goo quite a few times and after all Taylor had been through, I could understand his reluctance to open up (even as it frustrated the hell out of me).
July 7, 2017
3.5 stars
Well, I don't know where to start with this. Usually, I love this kind of stories about college and falling in love and stuff, and I did but near the end, I was a little bit disappointed. The writing style in this book was beautiful (the kind of writing that I love) but for some reason, I felt that it didn't quite connect with story nor the main character. At times there were these beautiful descriptions and then lacked later throughout the novel.
One of the reasons I stopped myself from giving this 4 stars was because I didn't feel a closure to the novel. And something happened near the last chapters that really pissed me off and I was not a fan about how the issues in the book were dealt. Just no.
Overall, I do think that the story was very great and compelling. I was hooked from the first till the last page. I recommend this even though it's not perfect, but absolutely addicting. And that is something.
Well, I don't know where to start with this. Usually, I love this kind of stories about college and falling in love and stuff, and I did but near the end, I was a little bit disappointed. The writing style in this book was beautiful (the kind of writing that I love) but for some reason, I felt that it didn't quite connect with story nor the main character. At times there were these beautiful descriptions and then lacked later throughout the novel.
One of the reasons I stopped myself from giving this 4 stars was because I didn't feel a closure to the novel. And something happened near the last chapters that really pissed me off and I was not a fan about how the issues in the book were dealt. Just no.
Overall, I do think that the story was very great and compelling. I was hooked from the first till the last page. I recommend this even though it's not perfect, but absolutely addicting. And that is something.
June 3, 2017
Aw Taylor, you've come so far, i'm so proud of you. Not even so oblivious anymore! I think I may be in love with Calis. And I want to be a part of that friend group so bad. Can we please have a Lee and Katt short story? I need to know what happens with them.
January 21, 2019
I didn't know it was possible to love a book as much as I love this one. It's taking everything I have to try to write a coherent review for this emotional, funny, heartfelt and amazing book. I knew from the very first page I was going to fall in love with this book, with its fantastic characters, with the story, and with its wit and I was not at all disappointed. Reason Number One couldn't be more perfect if it tried!
Taylor Lassau, sweet, awkward, caring beyond belief and ridiculously and unnecessarily self-deprecating, tells this story in the most endearing way possible. From his cute little stutters to his bouts of crippling self-doubt, Taylor is one of the most precious main characters I've ever had the pleasure of reading about! Reading this book was like being in his head and being able to experience the highs and lows of his first year of college first-hand. I LOVED that! I loved Taylor so much! He struggles so much with his inner demons and lack of self-confidence in the beginning and I enjoyed so much seeing him grow over time.
And then there's Calis Schrader. Bright, witty, gorgeous, Calis. I love him with EVERY FIBRE OF MY BEING! I mean, he just warmed my heart the entirety of this book. His interactions with Taylor made me smile SO MUCH that my face hurt. And my heart hurt from the overwhelming happiness. We see him transform over the course of the book and it was just a joy to see!
I highlighted so many lines in this book it is ridiculous! I want to read this book OVER AND OVER again! I was completely and utterly consumed by it and could not put it down. I nearly missed my stop on the bus on the way to work because I was so wrapped up in the story! I love that the dialogue felt so natural, with the "um's" and "uh's" that everyday conversation has. The writing felt more real than other YA novels I've read where the characters have such pretentious vocabularies (I love me some John Green, but his characters are definitely guilty of that).
Now don't get me wrong, this book is not all sunshine and rainbows. There's some heavy moments in here that had me fighting back tears–something I RARELY struggle with, so you can see how much this affected me. But Reason Number One is certainly a book that will stay with me for many years to come. I've I could rate this book with INFINITE stars, I would!! I cannot (and will not!) stop gushing about this beautiful little book.
Taylor Lassau, sweet, awkward, caring beyond belief and ridiculously and unnecessarily self-deprecating, tells this story in the most endearing way possible. From his cute little stutters to his bouts of crippling self-doubt, Taylor is one of the most precious main characters I've ever had the pleasure of reading about! Reading this book was like being in his head and being able to experience the highs and lows of his first year of college first-hand. I LOVED that! I loved Taylor so much! He struggles so much with his inner demons and lack of self-confidence in the beginning and I enjoyed so much seeing him grow over time.
And then there's Calis Schrader. Bright, witty, gorgeous, Calis. I love him with EVERY FIBRE OF MY BEING! I mean, he just warmed my heart the entirety of this book. His interactions with Taylor made me smile SO MUCH that my face hurt. And my heart hurt from the overwhelming happiness. We see him transform over the course of the book and it was just a joy to see!
I highlighted so many lines in this book it is ridiculous! I want to read this book OVER AND OVER again! I was completely and utterly consumed by it and could not put it down. I nearly missed my stop on the bus on the way to work because I was so wrapped up in the story! I love that the dialogue felt so natural, with the "um's" and "uh's" that everyday conversation has. The writing felt more real than other YA novels I've read where the characters have such pretentious vocabularies (I love me some John Green, but his characters are definitely guilty of that).
Now don't get me wrong, this book is not all sunshine and rainbows. There's some heavy moments in here that had me fighting back tears–something I RARELY struggle with, so you can see how much this affected me. But Reason Number One is certainly a book that will stay with me for many years to come. I've I could rate this book with INFINITE stars, I would!! I cannot (and will not!) stop gushing about this beautiful little book.
April 2, 2017
"But no words, just ticking silence. His eyes stayed pinned on me for an eternity, spinning colors. Green, blue, aquamarine, maybe violet. I stared back, swallowing horror, mostly because i couldn't look away to save my life."
Taylor es una criatura tan dulce, tan desinteresada, tan atenta, tan dañada. Te dan ganas de comértelo cada vez que abre la boca, es demasiado lindo. Calis tiene que agradecer que Taylor lo quiera tanto porque el tipo de amor de que ese chico posee no es cualquiera, es fuerte, es dulce, es leal. Tiene mucha mucha suerte de que Taylor siquiera lo mire porque ese niño merece todo, todo. La escena de navidad rompió mi corazón, demasiado todo.
Es un romance perfectamente lento. Anyta estaría muy orgullosa de este libro. Taylor se niega a interpretar las señales obvias como lo que son y todo el mundo sabe lo que él no. Pero él merece ese tiempo, merece su espacio, ser conquistado lentamente, ir muy de a poco, empezar a quererse por Dios, Taylor.
Me hubiera gustado que hacia el final alguien sugiriera algún tipo de ayuda profesional, terapia, porque las heridas de Taylor son muy profundas y tiene que hacer las paces consigo mismo. Por favor, que alguien lo lleve a terapia, por favor.
January 31, 2017
Люблю «страдающих» героев, но, по-моему, с Тэйлором автор все же перегнул палку: мамаша-фанатик, которая выгнала его из дома, проблемы с сердцем, шизанутый бывший и, как следствие, изнасилования и попытки суицида. Бедный парень только недавно закончил школу, а у него уже такой «багаж». Но несмотря на все свои проблемы Тэйлор не озлобился: он оправдывает поступок своей матери и всегда готов примчаться на помощь к друзьям (это при том, что он совмещает учебу в университете с двумя работами). Он такой идеально-правильный, что герои Мэри Калмс нервно курят в сторонке.
В общем, объективно книга не очень, но я почему-то не могла от нее оторваться.
В общем, объективно книга не очень, но я почему-то не могла от нее оторваться.
November 9, 2020
4.4 stars
First read: 19/07/2017
I really like this book so much. It was so cute and it made me happy. Taylor and Calis were so fucking in love with each other that it was between cute and painful (these assholes took so long to admit their feelings for each other that I was so close to screaming). Some parts were sad and I almost cry, Taylor is a wonderful character that too many shit happen to him, and he deserves the world. And Calis was always so amazing and cute to Taylor.
Overall, very very very cute. I recommend!
I actually want a little more of them.
Second read: 31/08/2020
First read: 19/07/2017
I really like this book so much. It was so cute and it made me happy. Taylor and Calis were so fucking in love with each other that it was between cute and painful (these assholes took so long to admit their feelings for each other that I was so close to screaming). Some parts were sad and I almost cry, Taylor is a wonderful character that too many shit happen to him, and he deserves the world. And Calis was always so amazing and cute to Taylor.
Overall, very very very cute. I recommend!
I actually want a little more of them.
Second read: 31/08/2020
February 3, 2025
Enjoyment 5*
Objectively probably 4*
Objectively probably 4*
May 20, 2017
DNF @20%. Really disliked this writing style. Very cluttered. Very odd way of putting things. These people don’t think/speak/act like real people. Some examples:
All my organs were ice blocks - slowly being chipped away by the pick that was his name.
…his gaze cutting quarter-sized chunks out of me…
His eyes pinned me, flickering like twin flames, blazing with blue green heat that dwarfed the dying ember of his cigarette.
His jaw bone pushed against his skin, defining his face like an artist’s pencil.
His eyebrows rose when he looked at me, eyes bluer than I remembered, making me very aware that the earth was rotating.
Tiredness sprayed me like raindrops.
His laugh made my heart flutter - quiet behind his teeth.
I flushed, wished my eyes weren’t so loud.
I smiled at Naoko. It twisted with strangulation fracturing my face.
Also, Calis & his friends seemed like assholes so far. And btw, I was distracted by that name & stumbled over the pronunciation every time.
All my organs were ice blocks - slowly being chipped away by the pick that was his name.
…his gaze cutting quarter-sized chunks out of me…
His eyes pinned me, flickering like twin flames, blazing with blue green heat that dwarfed the dying ember of his cigarette.
His jaw bone pushed against his skin, defining his face like an artist’s pencil.
His eyebrows rose when he looked at me, eyes bluer than I remembered, making me very aware that the earth was rotating.
Tiredness sprayed me like raindrops.
His laugh made my heart flutter - quiet behind his teeth.
I flushed, wished my eyes weren’t so loud.
I smiled at Naoko. It twisted with strangulation fracturing my face.
Also, Calis & his friends seemed like assholes so far. And btw, I was distracted by that name & stumbled over the pronunciation every time.
August 29, 2021
MM college campus novel
I really enjoyed this mostly because I fell in love with Calis ❤️ and roommate Raphael and the descriptions of the characters actions and feelings. Some of the best scene writing that I wish I highlighted them in my e-copy.
Frustrating MC - refuses to communicate
Super lovable LI
Check the TW on this one!
I really enjoyed this mostly because I fell in love with Calis ❤️ and roommate Raphael and the descriptions of the characters actions and feelings. Some of the best scene writing that I wish I highlighted them in my e-copy.
Frustrating MC - refuses to communicate
Super lovable LI
Check the TW on this one!
December 6, 2016
Hum.. so... it was enjoyable but at the same time it was really... not?
I spent the entire book torn between liking something and wanting to give up the next scene. It was a weird experience and I don't know how to explain myself.
I didn't liked the writing much, specially the dialogues, and everything felt rushed and meaningless. The time is clearly passing so is not the "insta" kind of thing but it feels so strange and there's absolutely no development that makes sense. It starts one way, a detail is introduced but forgotten for the rest of the time, it feel into this moral supportive cliché of niceness and comprehension.
I really don't know how to explain it better, to me there's a lot missing, from the plot and the book passing doesn't feel right with me.
The characters were surprisingly okay, though, except Taylor. I seriously disliked Taylor.
He was so ughhhhhhh. For real. So stupidly good, dense and forgiving. I don't have the right adjectives to describe him nor do I can, or want to, understand his personality. Just ughh nope.
I liked all the other characters, though. I specially adored Calis's mom. And Lee. I really like Lee. And Raphael.
(I wonder if this is suppose to be a stand alone or if the author will work on the other characters arcs.)
Oh well. It wasn't a painful book to read. It was okay and I did enjoy some parts but in the long run there's a lot that could be improved big time.
I spent the entire book torn between liking something and wanting to give up the next scene. It was a weird experience and I don't know how to explain myself.
I didn't liked the writing much, specially the dialogues, and everything felt rushed and meaningless. The time is clearly passing so is not the "insta" kind of thing but it feels so strange and there's absolutely no development that makes sense. It starts one way, a detail is introduced but forgotten for the rest of the time, it feel into this moral supportive cliché of niceness and comprehension.
I really don't know how to explain it better, to me there's a lot missing, from the plot and the book passing doesn't feel right with me.
The characters were surprisingly okay, though, except Taylor. I seriously disliked Taylor.
He was so ughhhhhhh. For real. So stupidly good, dense and forgiving. I don't have the right adjectives to describe him nor do I can, or want to, understand his personality. Just ughh nope.
I liked all the other characters, though. I specially adored Calis's mom. And Lee. I really like Lee. And Raphael.
(I wonder if this is suppose to be a stand alone or if the author will work on the other characters arcs.)
Oh well. It wasn't a painful book to read. It was okay and I did enjoy some parts but in the long run there's a lot that could be improved big time.
September 28, 2016
Liked it but very frustrating getting to the oh, yeah, we love each other.
While I really enjoyed reading this book, I have to say it was very frustrating at the same time. It took practically the whole book before Taylor and Calis FINALLY professed their love for each other. I ended up reading the end of the book just to make sure there was a HEA for them before I went back and finished the story. It bordered on ridiculous to me that they kept "missing" the signals each one was giving out. Also, I am confused as to whether they ever had sexual relations. The author was so ambiguous about this, having Taylor say he wasn't ready, and in the next paragraph hinting that he had changed his mind. Then the next instance they were on top of each other and began pulling each other's clothes off...and then the chapter ended. Then, bam, epilogue...it starts few months later, nothing about their relationship in the sense of physical or anything. Just talked about spending the summer at Calis's house. It really upset me that I had invested all this time and buildup for them to finally get together, and then the author just stops with no answers about how far the relationship had gone and if Taylor had overcome the fear of sexual relations. Otherwise, I really enjoyed the concept and the story very much, just not the unfulfilled ending.
While I really enjoyed reading this book, I have to say it was very frustrating at the same time. It took practically the whole book before Taylor and Calis FINALLY professed their love for each other. I ended up reading the end of the book just to make sure there was a HEA for them before I went back and finished the story. It bordered on ridiculous to me that they kept "missing" the signals each one was giving out. Also, I am confused as to whether they ever had sexual relations. The author was so ambiguous about this, having Taylor say he wasn't ready, and in the next paragraph hinting that he had changed his mind. Then the next instance they were on top of each other and began pulling each other's clothes off...and then the chapter ended. Then, bam, epilogue...it starts few months later, nothing about their relationship in the sense of physical or anything. Just talked about spending the summer at Calis's house. It really upset me that I had invested all this time and buildup for them to finally get together, and then the author just stops with no answers about how far the relationship had gone and if Taylor had overcome the fear of sexual relations. Otherwise, I really enjoyed the concept and the story very much, just not the unfulfilled ending.
April 24, 2017
This book took me by surprise. There's a long build-up of the gay Taylor, a deeply troubled teen, trying to figure out how if at all to approach the beautiful and confusing Calis, Taylor's new friend at college. Taylor is in love with Calis, but because of some past horrors with his ex-boyfriend, who still is in the picture, he can't quite move forward. I thought the long build would wear me out, but it did the opposite, it did what it was supposed to do, amp me up for the big finish. When the build finally broke, I was ready for it, just in time. This is a great gay coming of age and coming out story. The two lead characters are extraordinarily likable and their friends in the supporting cast all are well fleshed out and enjoyable. The drama is serious, the stakes are high, and the book is great. I strongly recommend it.
July 18, 2017
Oblivious? Me?
What a little ride this one is. A freshman in college, Taylor is trying to restart his life. He has enough baggage to fill the Dreamliner. Totally worried his new friends will find out he's gay and abandon his ass. Calis, one of his new friends, just may be Taylor's future. That is if Taylor has enough courage to be honest with him.
Loaded with angst for 2/3rds of the book. I kept waiting for them to finally connect. The sexual tension is great with these two. Both afraid to take the leap.
The writing triggers all of your senses. I'd award an extra .25 stars for one more pass with an editor. Just a couple of mistakes during intense scenes. That made it a bit distracting. Even so, I still and a few tissues for the tears. 4.5 for Cass (read: little devil)
What a little ride this one is. A freshman in college, Taylor is trying to restart his life. He has enough baggage to fill the Dreamliner. Totally worried his new friends will find out he's gay and abandon his ass. Calis, one of his new friends, just may be Taylor's future. That is if Taylor has enough courage to be honest with him.
Loaded with angst for 2/3rds of the book. I kept waiting for them to finally connect. The sexual tension is great with these two. Both afraid to take the leap.
The writing triggers all of your senses. I'd award an extra .25 stars for one more pass with an editor. Just a couple of mistakes during intense scenes. That made it a bit distracting. Even so, I still and a few tissues for the tears. 4.5 for Cass (read: little devil)
October 2, 2017
It may just be because I read them back-to-back, but I feel compelled to review 'Reason Number One' by Briston Brooks and 'Whatever' by S. J. Goslee together.
But first, for those playing along at home, a quick and dirty review of each!
Whatever:
I'd highly recommend reading a sample of this book before committing. I was educated in Australia in the latter part of the 80's, and the 90's (so, so long ago, I know) when it was completely unfashionable to teach grammar or, like, parts of language (gods, i don't even know the right word for it), and to be fair also had a hardcore case of undiagnosed ADHD, so have retained next to nothing...BUT, point is, the author has a really unique writing style (and please don't bother commenting to let me know what person it's in or whatever, at this stage and on this topic I'm the proverbial old dog, and really don't care). At any rate, I spent most of the book undecided about whether I loved the authors narrative style or hated it. You may want to test read to make sure you don't fall firmly in the latter camp before committing.
I wasn't quite so undecided about our protagonist - him, i didn't particularly like, at any point. But the thing is, despite an inherently unlikeable protagonist and a writing style I'm still trying to decide if I even like...I actually really liked this book. I was engaged, and yelling at characters in my head, and hoping for positive outcomes. I hate to say it felt 'real', because the teenage experience is pretty far from universal, and it's hard to write something thats6going to resonate with everyone, but...it nailed enough of the ubiquitous mess of feeling that often acompanies being a teenager that it did feel pretty Real, damn it.
So, four stars (just), on this one. More to come, after we review...
Reason Number One:
So we're talking what, three to five years older here, and what a difference those years make, so this book inevitably has a very different feel. And of course, its a very different book, much heavier, and takes itself much more seriously. Even the characters are serious all the time.
So while we're holding these two books side-by-side, I feel that where Whatever suprised me with how much it worked despite the odds, RN1 failed to suprise me much at all. And not in a good way. The characters slipped ever more slowly into one dimensional cliches and stereotypes, and the plot was predictably formulaic. The middle was drawn out entirely too long, and while I finished the book, it failed to grip me. Three and a quarter stars (sue me, I like being exact).
So, what do they have in common? Why review two so different books together?
Let's talk endings, shall we?
Now, it's something that, as an avid reader, I've given a lot (ahem, way too much) of thought to. When does a romance really end? Where is the optimal point for the author call time on a story? For me, my conclusion is thus: I dont care how it's shown, but I need to see the protagonists fully accepting themselves and being comfortable in tbemselves, and then fully committing to the relationship, for me to buy a happy endpoint. Then I'm good. It's irrelevant how the author shows that, insofar as I don't need a Grand Gesture or Wedding or whatever, just to be sold on those two points, as befits the story.
I should also add, I'm also onboard with HFN's as totally fine and having their place, but they need some solid, normally situation-related Reasons for an HFN not an HEA (not just a lazy author), and a feeling of hope - for the characters accepting themselves and being ok, whether together or not, if nothing else.
These two books?
Nope.
Whatever Ironically in some ways this actually makes me like this book more - like the protagonists' many faults it seems real and inevitably teenage.
RN1 also fails it's ending -
So, the moral of our story is: authors, endings matter. Well obviously, but you know, a lot. Make or break size of matter.
And while RN1's failed to redeem an otherwise mediocre story, Whatever's was annoying yet strangely fitting.
Both serve as the perfect summary for the entire books' review - so if annoying yet compelling works for you, give Whatever a go. And we'll go with the old adage of "if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all", and end the review there with regards RN1.
Happy reading!
But first, for those playing along at home, a quick and dirty review of each!
Whatever:
I'd highly recommend reading a sample of this book before committing. I was educated in Australia in the latter part of the 80's, and the 90's (so, so long ago, I know) when it was completely unfashionable to teach grammar or, like, parts of language (gods, i don't even know the right word for it), and to be fair also had a hardcore case of undiagnosed ADHD, so have retained next to nothing...BUT, point is, the author has a really unique writing style (and please don't bother commenting to let me know what person it's in or whatever, at this stage and on this topic I'm the proverbial old dog, and really don't care). At any rate, I spent most of the book undecided about whether I loved the authors narrative style or hated it. You may want to test read to make sure you don't fall firmly in the latter camp before committing.
I wasn't quite so undecided about our protagonist - him, i didn't particularly like, at any point. But the thing is, despite an inherently unlikeable protagonist and a writing style I'm still trying to decide if I even like...I actually really liked this book. I was engaged, and yelling at characters in my head, and hoping for positive outcomes. I hate to say it felt 'real', because the teenage experience is pretty far from universal, and it's hard to write something thats6going to resonate with everyone, but...it nailed enough of the ubiquitous mess of feeling that often acompanies being a teenager that it did feel pretty Real, damn it.
So, four stars (just), on this one. More to come, after we review...
Reason Number One:
So we're talking what, three to five years older here, and what a difference those years make, so this book inevitably has a very different feel. And of course, its a very different book, much heavier, and takes itself much more seriously. Even the characters are serious all the time.
So while we're holding these two books side-by-side, I feel that where Whatever suprised me with how much it worked despite the odds, RN1 failed to suprise me much at all. And not in a good way. The characters slipped ever more slowly into one dimensional cliches and stereotypes, and the plot was predictably formulaic. The middle was drawn out entirely too long, and while I finished the book, it failed to grip me. Three and a quarter stars (sue me, I like being exact).
So, what do they have in common? Why review two so different books together?
Let's talk endings, shall we?
Now, it's something that, as an avid reader, I've given a lot (ahem, way too much) of thought to. When does a romance really end? Where is the optimal point for the author call time on a story? For me, my conclusion is thus: I dont care how it's shown, but I need to see the protagonists fully accepting themselves and being comfortable in tbemselves, and then fully committing to the relationship, for me to buy a happy endpoint. Then I'm good. It's irrelevant how the author shows that, insofar as I don't need a Grand Gesture or Wedding or whatever, just to be sold on those two points, as befits the story.
I should also add, I'm also onboard with HFN's as totally fine and having their place, but they need some solid, normally situation-related Reasons for an HFN not an HEA (not just a lazy author), and a feeling of hope - for the characters accepting themselves and being ok, whether together or not, if nothing else.
These two books?
Nope.
Whatever Ironically in some ways this actually makes me like this book more - like the protagonists' many faults it seems real and inevitably teenage.
RN1 also fails it's ending -
So, the moral of our story is: authors, endings matter. Well obviously, but you know, a lot. Make or break size of matter.
And while RN1's failed to redeem an otherwise mediocre story, Whatever's was annoying yet strangely fitting.
Both serve as the perfect summary for the entire books' review - so if annoying yet compelling works for you, give Whatever a go. And we'll go with the old adage of "if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all", and end the review there with regards RN1.
Happy reading!
August 16, 2017
Rereading this was the absolute best decision ever!
February 28, 2018
Whenever I want something new to read, I often look at what the people I follow have recently finished or what they recommend. I need to do a little research before I commit to just about anything, whether that means scouring through reviews or reading a sample, which is what I did with Reason Number One. I saw where Whitney Atkinson enjoyed this last year and thought it might have potential, and since some of my newer favorite books have been self-published, I chose to give this a chance. It didn't have the impact I thought it would based on the synopsis, but there were still many things Brooks did well in her debut work.
For starters, she didn't shy away from heavy, oftentimes taboo topics, and she explored them in a way that looked at the main character's emotional and psychological state without making the book needlessly angsty. The depiction of Taylor's anxiety was one of the things that worked the most for me: at first, it annoyed me sometimes because of how he questioned every little interaction, but this ultimately allowed me to place myself in his shoes and consider how different my life would be if I analyzed everything to the extent he does. There was so much going on with Taylor, a lot of trauma he was trying to work through as he navigated new surroundings and friends and fears. He definitely came into himself, and while I liked how he found healing through various kinds of love, I appreciated the fact that Brooks realistically showcased trauma as a long-going recovery. Taylor literally had no self-control when it came to his crush, though, which was funny at first but then felt kind of juvenile.
The romance was pretty cute, nothing extraordinary, although I did enjoy Taylor and Calis's banter. I liked how Taylor could be head over heals in love with Calis while also being aware of his faults and never trying to sugarcoat them. They were both a bit too oblivious at times (though again, Taylor's insecurities were a major contributing factor), but they supported each other in various ways and didn't have a relationship based on sex, which I was highly grateful for. Really, the way Brooks handled their conversations regarding sex was so well done. The other characters were...okay. Some were more fleshed out, such as Lee and Katt, but then others like Taylor's sister fell flat. The ex-boyfriend could have been better rounded, with more focus placed on how his own abuse lead to his hurting Taylor, and I wanted to see more of Taylor's childhood because it may have better illuminated his mother, who was only ever a suggestion and not a real person.
I think what underwhelmed me the most was the writing and the lack of an actual plot. Oh, there's definitely a story in how Taylor must confront his past in order to hold on to the future he's building and how he slowly realizes he's worthy of love and respect. But there wasn't very much propelling the story for me, even with the threat of a crazy ex and falling in love for the first time. I wanted more interaction between Taylor and his friends, more time spent on him traversing college as he struggled to be financially independent. I was never bored with the events taking place, but there wasn't anything really compelling me to read. As for the writing, it sounded extremely young at times; Taylor's narration felt like a teenager's rather than a college freshman, with simple descriptors that often kept me from completely imagining the characters' surroundings. I also feel that with some editing, many of the stutters and ellipses could have been cut without the hesitancy being lost.
I don't exactly want to call Reason Number One a nice, easy read due to the content it deals with (rape, domestic violence, self-harm), but I breezed through it. The story itself didn't ever feel like it was supposed to be super dark, but rather hope filled as it followed Taylor's recovery. Even though this book didn't fully hit the mark with me, I'm glad I decided to pick it up.
For starters, she didn't shy away from heavy, oftentimes taboo topics, and she explored them in a way that looked at the main character's emotional and psychological state without making the book needlessly angsty. The depiction of Taylor's anxiety was one of the things that worked the most for me: at first, it annoyed me sometimes because of how he questioned every little interaction, but this ultimately allowed me to place myself in his shoes and consider how different my life would be if I analyzed everything to the extent he does. There was so much going on with Taylor, a lot of trauma he was trying to work through as he navigated new surroundings and friends and fears. He definitely came into himself, and while I liked how he found healing through various kinds of love, I appreciated the fact that Brooks realistically showcased trauma as a long-going recovery. Taylor literally had no self-control when it came to his crush, though, which was funny at first but then felt kind of juvenile.
The romance was pretty cute, nothing extraordinary, although I did enjoy Taylor and Calis's banter. I liked how Taylor could be head over heals in love with Calis while also being aware of his faults and never trying to sugarcoat them. They were both a bit too oblivious at times (though again, Taylor's insecurities were a major contributing factor), but they supported each other in various ways and didn't have a relationship based on sex, which I was highly grateful for. Really, the way Brooks handled their conversations regarding sex was so well done. The other characters were...okay. Some were more fleshed out, such as Lee and Katt, but then others like Taylor's sister fell flat. The ex-boyfriend could have been better rounded, with more focus placed on how his own abuse lead to his hurting Taylor, and I wanted to see more of Taylor's childhood because it may have better illuminated his mother, who was only ever a suggestion and not a real person.
I think what underwhelmed me the most was the writing and the lack of an actual plot. Oh, there's definitely a story in how Taylor must confront his past in order to hold on to the future he's building and how he slowly realizes he's worthy of love and respect. But there wasn't very much propelling the story for me, even with the threat of a crazy ex and falling in love for the first time. I wanted more interaction between Taylor and his friends, more time spent on him traversing college as he struggled to be financially independent. I was never bored with the events taking place, but there wasn't anything really compelling me to read. As for the writing, it sounded extremely young at times; Taylor's narration felt like a teenager's rather than a college freshman, with simple descriptors that often kept me from completely imagining the characters' surroundings. I also feel that with some editing, many of the stutters and ellipses could have been cut without the hesitancy being lost.
I don't exactly want to call Reason Number One a nice, easy read due to the content it deals with (rape, domestic violence, self-harm), but I breezed through it. The story itself didn't ever feel like it was supposed to be super dark, but rather hope filled as it followed Taylor's recovery. Even though this book didn't fully hit the mark with me, I'm glad I decided to pick it up.
July 1, 2018
Found this book in random searches and decided to try it. I usually don't write reviews, but I wanted to address a few things.
The books tackles a few difficult topics (violence, rape, self-harm, etc'), and from the very first few words I could tell the bad mental condition of the protagonist, Taylor. Following his thoughts was mostly a lot of fun, but I also found it very relatable for anxiety. At any given moment I could tell how anxious he was, and how it affected his view on the reality around him. I appreciated his POV a lot, as a person battling mental illness and PTSD related to assault.
The relationship between Taylor and Calis was, at first, worrisome. The kind of love-at-first-sight I got a really bad feeling about until I got to their first scene alone together. After that, I Found Calis' character a bit bland, but he's definitely the dream lover for Taylor's wounded personality. I found that the book was a lot about portraying a healthy relationship, which isn't easy to do, and, for me, it ended up making one of the characters not very interesting, but I still felt impressed at the notion and how well it turned out in most other aspects.
I find it hard to come across Healthy relationships in fiction, and I can't help but appreciate any author who tries.
One last thing, I was very pleased to find a good portrait of bisexuality. A lot of the time in situations like in this book, a character like Calis ends up as "I was straight until I met you" and I really hate that. Calis wasn't confused or suddenly figuring himself out, and his older friends all knew about it, too. I felt proud reading about a bi character portrayed in such a positive light.
overall, I think the book was nice and fun, and maybe not the most interesting all the time, but it did make a few very important points in portraying positive aspects of what it wanted. That is missing in a lot of other fictional works.
The books tackles a few difficult topics (violence, rape, self-harm, etc'), and from the very first few words I could tell the bad mental condition of the protagonist, Taylor. Following his thoughts was mostly a lot of fun, but I also found it very relatable for anxiety. At any given moment I could tell how anxious he was, and how it affected his view on the reality around him. I appreciated his POV a lot, as a person battling mental illness and PTSD related to assault.
The relationship between Taylor and Calis was, at first, worrisome. The kind of love-at-first-sight I got a really bad feeling about until I got to their first scene alone together. After that, I Found Calis' character a bit bland, but he's definitely the dream lover for Taylor's wounded personality. I found that the book was a lot about portraying a healthy relationship, which isn't easy to do, and, for me, it ended up making one of the characters not very interesting, but I still felt impressed at the notion and how well it turned out in most other aspects.
I find it hard to come across Healthy relationships in fiction, and I can't help but appreciate any author who tries.
One last thing, I was very pleased to find a good portrait of bisexuality. A lot of the time in situations like in this book, a character like Calis ends up as "I was straight until I met you" and I really hate that. Calis wasn't confused or suddenly figuring himself out, and his older friends all knew about it, too. I felt proud reading about a bi character portrayed in such a positive light.
overall, I think the book was nice and fun, and maybe not the most interesting all the time, but it did make a few very important points in portraying positive aspects of what it wanted. That is missing in a lot of other fictional works.
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