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30 Days To Taming your Tongue
Stop saying the wrong thing at the wrong time in the wrong way! Start right now on a 30-day quest that is truly tongue—and life--changing.
Certified behavioral consultant Deborah Smith Pegues shows you how to gain control of your words one day, one reading at a time. With practical help and biblical insight, 30 Days to Taming Your Tongue teaches you to confront the real issues behind half-truths, gossip, rudeness, cynical talk, and many more.
Certified behavioral consultant Deborah Smith Pegues shows you how to gain control of your words one day, one reading at a time. With practical help and biblical insight, 30 Days to Taming Your Tongue teaches you to confront the real issues behind half-truths, gossip, rudeness, cynical talk, and many more.
142 pages, Mass Market Paperback
First published April 1, 2005
356 people are currently reading
846 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 139 reviews
April 24, 2012
lol... that tongue is a beast!!!! This book was given to me on my birthday 2009 by the parent of a friend of my daughter. She knew I was in radio and after a couple of conversations between us I made the statement..."I talk for a living but I'd love to be able to have that same control OFF the mic!" We don't talk anymore...haven't spoken in years...but her gift to me was the reason we bonded when we did. This one should be required reading for teenagers before they graduate... couples BEFORE they divorce... parents BEFORE they start a family... supervisors BEFORE they attempt to lead a crew! Sometimes it's not WHAT you say...but HOW you say it!
June 9, 2010
This was a quick read with a lot of meat to it. I read it in one day spent in the air flying across the country. It gave me a lot to think about. It is written in a quick and easy day by day format so I plan to reread it a bit every day and look up all the scriptures that go along with each daily chapter. Truly what we say and don't say can and will improve relationships.
March 2, 2021
This book made me think and it means, this is a particularly good book. Every day, most of us, open our mouth and speak whatever it is in our thoughts, many times driven by negative feelings. We voice our negative emotions careless. There are times we think before we talk, but many times we don't. This book is about how "what you say (and don't say) can change your life and better your relationships.
Many times, we use our tongue to lie, flatter, manipulate, or to be divisive or hasty, to argument, boast, gossip, to belittle others, to be cynical, harsh, tactless... the list is long. But by refraining ourselves from negative speaking, we can use the same tongue (our own tongue) to engage in positive words, like to apologize, to admit a mistake, to pray, to express gratitude, to comfort someone, ask for help, to assist someone in need, to give a nice compliment, to share knowledge, to encourage someone, to say "please", to defend someone… and the list is also long. Like everything in life, we have always two options to follow: one positive and one negative. It is up to us to choose how we want to use it. The book is very small and is based on the Bible teachings but worth to read.
****** Same review in Portuguese - A mesmo crítica mas em português *********
Este livro me fez-me pensar i sso significa que este é um livro particularmente bom. Todos os dias, a maioria de nós, abre a boca e fala o que quer que esteja em nossos pensamentos, muitas vezes movidos por sentimentos negativos. Expressamos as nossas emoções negativas de forma descuidada. Há momentos em que pensamos antes de falar, mas muitas vezes nãoo fazemos. Este livro é sobre como "o que você diz (e não diz) pode mudar sua vida e melhorar os seus relacionamentos.
Muitas vezes, usamos a nossa língua para mentir, adular, manipular ou ser divisivos ou apressados, para discutir, vangloriar, intrigar, menosprezar os outros, ser cínicos, rudes, sem tato ... a lista é longa. Mas, ao nos abstermos de falar negativamente, podemos usar a mesma língua (a nossa própria língua) para nos cometermos a falar palavras positivas, como pedir desculpas, admitir um erro, rezar, expressar gratidão, confortar alguém, pedir ajuda, ajudar quem precisa, dar um bom elogio, compartilhar conhecimento, encorajar alguém, dizer "por favor", defender alguém ... e a lista também é longa. Como tudo na vida, temos sempre duas opções a seguir: uma positiva e outra negativa. Cabe a nós escolhermos qual a que queremos seguir. O livro é muito pequeno e é baseado nos ensinamentos da Bíblia, mas vale a pena ler.
Many times, we use our tongue to lie, flatter, manipulate, or to be divisive or hasty, to argument, boast, gossip, to belittle others, to be cynical, harsh, tactless... the list is long. But by refraining ourselves from negative speaking, we can use the same tongue (our own tongue) to engage in positive words, like to apologize, to admit a mistake, to pray, to express gratitude, to comfort someone, ask for help, to assist someone in need, to give a nice compliment, to share knowledge, to encourage someone, to say "please", to defend someone… and the list is also long. Like everything in life, we have always two options to follow: one positive and one negative. It is up to us to choose how we want to use it. The book is very small and is based on the Bible teachings but worth to read.
****** Same review in Portuguese - A mesmo crítica mas em português *********
Este livro me fez-me pensar i sso significa que este é um livro particularmente bom. Todos os dias, a maioria de nós, abre a boca e fala o que quer que esteja em nossos pensamentos, muitas vezes movidos por sentimentos negativos. Expressamos as nossas emoções negativas de forma descuidada. Há momentos em que pensamos antes de falar, mas muitas vezes nãoo fazemos. Este livro é sobre como "o que você diz (e não diz) pode mudar sua vida e melhorar os seus relacionamentos.
Muitas vezes, usamos a nossa língua para mentir, adular, manipular ou ser divisivos ou apressados, para discutir, vangloriar, intrigar, menosprezar os outros, ser cínicos, rudes, sem tato ... a lista é longa. Mas, ao nos abstermos de falar negativamente, podemos usar a mesma língua (a nossa própria língua) para nos cometermos a falar palavras positivas, como pedir desculpas, admitir um erro, rezar, expressar gratidão, confortar alguém, pedir ajuda, ajudar quem precisa, dar um bom elogio, compartilhar conhecimento, encorajar alguém, dizer "por favor", defender alguém ... e a lista também é longa. Como tudo na vida, temos sempre duas opções a seguir: uma positiva e outra negativa. Cabe a nós escolhermos qual a que queremos seguir. O livro é muito pequeno e é baseado nos ensinamentos da Bíblia, mas vale a pena ler.
February 27, 2020
Excellent reminders to everyone.
The author has a list of 30 ways (30 days), in which our wicked tongue needs to be held in check.
pg 40 What others call you is not important; it is only what you call yourself. Do you allow a label to define you? (this is day 8, the self-deprecating tongue)
pg 68-69 The harsh tongue, I was pleased the author talked about cultivating a habit of speaking kind words, especially to those whom we feel may not deserve it. And offers a word of caution that this doesn't mean we are to bury our heads in the sand and refuse to deal with problematic situations.
pg 86 Benjamin Franklin, said, "I will speak ill of no man, not even in the matter of truth, but rather excuse the faults I hear and, upon proper occasions, speak all the good I know of everybody." This is under the judgmental tongue.
pg 112 the discouraging tongue, saying something "well-phrased" such as "how did you determine the market for your product?" instead of "Gee, I don't think many people would be interested in that!"
At the back of the book are three appendices; a checklist for a daily tongue evaluation, a list of how to refrain from negative speaking, tongue/speech scripture
What I didn't like: the use of various Bible versions for scripture and the adulation of Joel Osteen.
It's worth the read and the reminder.
The author has a list of 30 ways (30 days), in which our wicked tongue needs to be held in check.
pg 40 What others call you is not important; it is only what you call yourself. Do you allow a label to define you? (this is day 8, the self-deprecating tongue)
pg 68-69 The harsh tongue, I was pleased the author talked about cultivating a habit of speaking kind words, especially to those whom we feel may not deserve it. And offers a word of caution that this doesn't mean we are to bury our heads in the sand and refuse to deal with problematic situations.
pg 86 Benjamin Franklin, said, "I will speak ill of no man, not even in the matter of truth, but rather excuse the faults I hear and, upon proper occasions, speak all the good I know of everybody." This is under the judgmental tongue.
pg 112 the discouraging tongue, saying something "well-phrased" such as "how did you determine the market for your product?" instead of "Gee, I don't think many people would be interested in that!"
At the back of the book are three appendices; a checklist for a daily tongue evaluation, a list of how to refrain from negative speaking, tongue/speech scripture
What I didn't like: the use of various Bible versions for scripture and the adulation of Joel Osteen.
It's worth the read and the reminder.
December 13, 2020
You are suppose to read this book for 30 days and work on having a more Godly tongue. You can even go on a tongue fast if you need to. I did like certain quotes in the book.
The Lying Tongue, page 14 "I find it interesting that the word "integrity" derives from "integer," which is a mathematical term. An integer is a whole number as opposed to a fraction. When we walk in integrity, we tell the whole truth and not just a fraction or part of it. Someone was well aware of the many ways there are to lie when he suggested that court oaths charge a person to tell " the truth, the whole truth, and nothing, but the truth."
The Flattering Tongue, page 17 "How does it feel to be the most beautiful woman in the room? According to an internet poll of the best pickup lines, men voted this question as the most effective for flattering a woman."
The Argumentative Tongue, page 32 "They seem to be on high alert for anything they can discuss that will get someone else on the defensive." Page 33 " Many quarrelrs grew up in homes where arguing was as much a pattern as eating. Thus, they think it is normal to contend." "When he runs out of points to put forth or has no logical response to his opponents' rebuttals, he resorts to personal attacks on their character and name-calling. He has chosen to emulate the behavior he witnessed as a child."
The Belittling Tongue, page 58 "Do people feel better about themselves after spending time with you?"
The Cynical Tongue, page 62 "Cynicism is like venom; it poisons the atmosphere wherever it is present. Resorting to it will also poison your spirit and that of others."
The Know-It-All Tongue, page 66 "Is your display of knowledge a smoke screen for insecurity? Are you craving attention or appreciation because you are not getting it from the source you desire?"
The Intimidating Tongue, page 77 "Note that in the Garden of Eden, He gave Adam and Eve dominion over the fish, fowl, and animals--not over each other or other people." Page 78 "Many intimidators grew up in chaotic or otherwise negative environments in which they felt powerless to change their circumstances. They vowed they would never allow their lives to be so out of control again, so they seek control. Others are simply a bundle of insecurities and use intimidation as a facade to mask their fears. Whatever the cause, intimidators can never hope to have a meaningful relationship with anyone who is forced into submission."
The Rude Tongue, page 83 "Know that when you are rude, you have made a very selfish and ungodly decision that your needs or concerns are paramount to all others."
The Self-Absorbed Tongue, page 91, reworded "Have you ever talked with someone and the minute you mention a personal concern, they immediately identify with it through their own experience and suddenly the focus of the discussion is all about them. Become aware of this character flaw in your communication. Ask God to make you genuinely interested in others. Admit to being the self-absorbed type. Turn your desires for attention, ego boosting, and other selfish needs over God. Challenge yourself to go a whole day or more without making your issues the focus of your communications.
The Cursing Tongue, page 95 "Remember that words are verbal thoughts."
The Complaining Tongue, page 98 "A legitimate complaint can only be resolved if you direct it to the one who can change your situation."
The Retaliating Tongue, page 102, reworded, "Do you find pleasure in sharing negative details about another person? This is still a way of getting indirect satisfaction. Do not repay evil for evil."
The Accusing Tongue, page 105 "Job's insensitive, well-meaning friends accused him of pride, covetousness, and a host of other character failings. Although they came to sympathize with him, these three miserable comforters spent the majority of the time trying to convince Job he was responsible for his own woes." Page 106, reworded, "God already knew the answer to each of the three questions He asked Adam. He gave Adam an opportunity to explain his behavior. Asking a clarifying question and listening to the response are key steps in overcoming an accusing tongue.
The Discouraging Tongue, page 111, reworded, "In reference to the twelve spies, the discouraging words of ten men caused thousands of men and women to miss their inheritance. If only the ten had chosen to be encouragers instead."
The Lying Tongue, page 14 "I find it interesting that the word "integrity" derives from "integer," which is a mathematical term. An integer is a whole number as opposed to a fraction. When we walk in integrity, we tell the whole truth and not just a fraction or part of it. Someone was well aware of the many ways there are to lie when he suggested that court oaths charge a person to tell " the truth, the whole truth, and nothing, but the truth."
The Flattering Tongue, page 17 "How does it feel to be the most beautiful woman in the room? According to an internet poll of the best pickup lines, men voted this question as the most effective for flattering a woman."
The Argumentative Tongue, page 32 "They seem to be on high alert for anything they can discuss that will get someone else on the defensive." Page 33 " Many quarrelrs grew up in homes where arguing was as much a pattern as eating. Thus, they think it is normal to contend." "When he runs out of points to put forth or has no logical response to his opponents' rebuttals, he resorts to personal attacks on their character and name-calling. He has chosen to emulate the behavior he witnessed as a child."
The Belittling Tongue, page 58 "Do people feel better about themselves after spending time with you?"
The Cynical Tongue, page 62 "Cynicism is like venom; it poisons the atmosphere wherever it is present. Resorting to it will also poison your spirit and that of others."
The Know-It-All Tongue, page 66 "Is your display of knowledge a smoke screen for insecurity? Are you craving attention or appreciation because you are not getting it from the source you desire?"
The Intimidating Tongue, page 77 "Note that in the Garden of Eden, He gave Adam and Eve dominion over the fish, fowl, and animals--not over each other or other people." Page 78 "Many intimidators grew up in chaotic or otherwise negative environments in which they felt powerless to change their circumstances. They vowed they would never allow their lives to be so out of control again, so they seek control. Others are simply a bundle of insecurities and use intimidation as a facade to mask their fears. Whatever the cause, intimidators can never hope to have a meaningful relationship with anyone who is forced into submission."
The Rude Tongue, page 83 "Know that when you are rude, you have made a very selfish and ungodly decision that your needs or concerns are paramount to all others."
The Self-Absorbed Tongue, page 91, reworded "Have you ever talked with someone and the minute you mention a personal concern, they immediately identify with it through their own experience and suddenly the focus of the discussion is all about them. Become aware of this character flaw in your communication. Ask God to make you genuinely interested in others. Admit to being the self-absorbed type. Turn your desires for attention, ego boosting, and other selfish needs over God. Challenge yourself to go a whole day or more without making your issues the focus of your communications.
The Cursing Tongue, page 95 "Remember that words are verbal thoughts."
The Complaining Tongue, page 98 "A legitimate complaint can only be resolved if you direct it to the one who can change your situation."
The Retaliating Tongue, page 102, reworded, "Do you find pleasure in sharing negative details about another person? This is still a way of getting indirect satisfaction. Do not repay evil for evil."
The Accusing Tongue, page 105 "Job's insensitive, well-meaning friends accused him of pride, covetousness, and a host of other character failings. Although they came to sympathize with him, these three miserable comforters spent the majority of the time trying to convince Job he was responsible for his own woes." Page 106, reworded, "God already knew the answer to each of the three questions He asked Adam. He gave Adam an opportunity to explain his behavior. Asking a clarifying question and listening to the response are key steps in overcoming an accusing tongue.
The Discouraging Tongue, page 111, reworded, "In reference to the twelve spies, the discouraging words of ten men caused thousands of men and women to miss their inheritance. If only the ten had chosen to be encouragers instead."
December 3, 2024
Words can hurt or they can heal. The author focuses on a negative use of the tongue for 30 days and illustrates the damage that can be done to relationships when we engage in sinful or foolish talk. The reader is encouraged to reverse “the curse” by “fasting” from hurtful words and wisely choosing our words to build others up and restore and maintain healthy relationships.
December 4, 2024
I used to curse like a sailor, but praise God for He makes the impossible possible. This book was a nice refresher on other things we should keep out of our mouths. It even includes a checklist to go through daily and provides suggestions on things to work on, plus Bible verses to support the message.
September 23, 2015
I liked this book. It was a quick and easy read with a lot of good tips on how to tame your tongue -- which no one can do all on their own.
August 19, 2022
One of the best books to help you have good relationships with all people.
April 27, 2023
30 Days to Taming Your Tongue: What You Say (and Don't Say) Will Improve Your Relationships by Deborah Smith Pegues
2h 6m narrated by Kiersten Kingsley, 144 pages
Genre:Christian, Nonfiction, Self Help
Christian Living, Spirituality, Christianity, Religion, Inspirational
Featuring: Bible Verses, Lying Tongue, Flattering Tongue, Manipulating Tongue, Hasty Tongue, Divisive Tongue, Argumentative Tongue, Boasting Tongue, Self-Deprecating Tongue, Slandering Tongue, Gossiping Tongue, Meddling, Betraying Tongue, Belittling Tongue, Cynical Tongue, Know-It-All Tongue, Harsh Tongue, Tactless Tongue, Intimidating Tongue, Rude Tongue, Judgmental Tongue, Self-Absorbed Tongue, Cursing Tongue, Complaining Tongue, Retaliating Tongue, Accusing Tongue, Discouraging Tongue, Doubting Tongue, Loquacious Tongue, Indiscreet Tongue, Silent Tongue, Daily Tongue Evaluation Checklist, Alternative Uses of the Tongue, Arsenal of Tongue Scriptures
Rating as a movie: PG
My rating: 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟
My thoughts: 📱This book was really good. Apparently, I just shouldn't talk. 😂 I was agreeing with everything she said until she got to the indiscretion of leadership; I don't know about all that! If you're doing dirt, I don't think it's my job to cover it up or keep it under wraps.
Recommend to others?: Yes! This is a very good lesson in communication.
2h 6m narrated by Kiersten Kingsley, 144 pages
Genre:Christian, Nonfiction, Self Help
Christian Living, Spirituality, Christianity, Religion, Inspirational
Featuring: Bible Verses, Lying Tongue, Flattering Tongue, Manipulating Tongue, Hasty Tongue, Divisive Tongue, Argumentative Tongue, Boasting Tongue, Self-Deprecating Tongue, Slandering Tongue, Gossiping Tongue, Meddling, Betraying Tongue, Belittling Tongue, Cynical Tongue, Know-It-All Tongue, Harsh Tongue, Tactless Tongue, Intimidating Tongue, Rude Tongue, Judgmental Tongue, Self-Absorbed Tongue, Cursing Tongue, Complaining Tongue, Retaliating Tongue, Accusing Tongue, Discouraging Tongue, Doubting Tongue, Loquacious Tongue, Indiscreet Tongue, Silent Tongue, Daily Tongue Evaluation Checklist, Alternative Uses of the Tongue, Arsenal of Tongue Scriptures
Rating as a movie: PG
My rating: 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟
My thoughts: 📱This book was really good. Apparently, I just shouldn't talk. 😂 I was agreeing with everything she said until she got to the indiscretion of leadership; I don't know about all that! If you're doing dirt, I don't think it's my job to cover it up or keep it under wraps.
Recommend to others?: Yes! This is a very good lesson in communication.
January 14, 2024
So basically if you say anything beyond Scriptures or actual meaningful and genuine things (without expecting anything out of it) then you are commiting some sin because as the chapters/days are named, any of these mean you are not speaking as God wants you to:
Lying
Flattering
Manipulating
Hasty
Divisive
Argumenitative
Boasting
Self-Deprecating
Slandering
Gossiping
Meddling
Betraying
Belittling
Cynical
Know-it-all
Harsh
Tactless
Intimidating
Rude
Judgemental
Self-absorbed
Cursing
Complaining
Retaliating
Accusing
Discouraging
Doubting
Loquacious
Indiscreet
Silent
Basically.... you can't win. You can't even be silent. It's just... no.
Lying
Flattering
Manipulating
Hasty
Divisive
Argumenitative
Boasting
Self-Deprecating
Slandering
Gossiping
Meddling
Betraying
Belittling
Cynical
Know-it-all
Harsh
Tactless
Intimidating
Rude
Judgemental
Self-absorbed
Cursing
Complaining
Retaliating
Accusing
Discouraging
Doubting
Loquacious
Indiscreet
Silent
Basically.... you can't win. You can't even be silent. It's just... no.
September 29, 2022
relationship advice with some Bible thrown in
The book is uneven, some great advice and some incredibly unhealthy and unrealistic advice - like one should never use angry words.
The illustrations from the scriptures seem forced — like pounding a square peg into a round hole. I could think of more appropriate verses which didn’t stretch the meaning and still made the point.
I got the feeling the author had run out of things to says but had it in her mind that the book needed to be a set number of pages.
The book is uneven, some great advice and some incredibly unhealthy and unrealistic advice - like one should never use angry words.
The illustrations from the scriptures seem forced — like pounding a square peg into a round hole. I could think of more appropriate verses which didn’t stretch the meaning and still made the point.
I got the feeling the author had run out of things to says but had it in her mind that the book needed to be a set number of pages.
June 3, 2023
Very practical and tangible read! Putting it all into practice is not as easy, but thankful for the author’s dedication to scripture and reminder that it is only the Holy Spirit who tames the tongue. Overall, a book that I will come back to for the rest of my life!
July 2, 2025
This book is a must-read for everyone. The tongue is definitely a beast to be tamed in life, especially for those striving towards God! Need to keep the appendix of this book with the checklists on hand - would be a good addition to an examen at the end of each day.
August 19, 2018
Convicting study of the ways we can misuse our tongue. I definitely recommend it.
October 21, 2023
This was a great read. Short and simple. Alternative ways to speak to people so not to hurt their feelings or sound harsh.
December 29, 2023
I need to read this 365 days a year
August 18, 2024
Good info, but I wish it had more detail.
February 28, 2018
"It was legendary American-cowboy-turned-entertainer Will Rogers who cautioned, “People’s
minds are changed through observation and not through argument.” In other words, contentiousness negates one’s ability to bring about change."
" While honesty is indeed the best policy, it is not a license to say whatever we want. One of the most important skills we can develop is the ability to deal with others with sensitivity and to speak inoffensively when we find ourselves in difficult or problematic situations."
"... when my husband and I are about to make a large purchase, such as a car, I chuckle within as the sales-person, usually a male, assumes I know nothing about finances. He proceeds to explain loan terms and other financial aspects of the deal. I go with the flow and watch his astonishment when he finds out that I am a certified public accountant with many years of experience" I'm not sure why this example was used. The salesperson was just doing their job. If this had occurred elsewhere (such as a meeting with a prospective client) it would of made a good argument against being a "know-it-all" tongue, but this was just in poor taste.
As a non-believer this book has some of it's truths, but when it gets tied into the judeo-christian bible, it quickly loses it's effect for me. For example, the quote "Know that all lies
originate with Satan. Period" has no meaning for me. On the topic of Satan, one truly amazing thing about this 30 Days to Taming Your Tongue is that it rarely blames Satan for the negative things you are doing. It does have it's moments doing that, but it few and far between. Sometimes, your problems are of your own doing, not Satan.
I think that this book would be good for those who need a spark-note like jump off point for a spur of the moment vesper, but not for reading all the way through, especially in one setting as you will quickly spot the redundancies and conflicting advice.
minds are changed through observation and not through argument.” In other words, contentiousness negates one’s ability to bring about change."
" While honesty is indeed the best policy, it is not a license to say whatever we want. One of the most important skills we can develop is the ability to deal with others with sensitivity and to speak inoffensively when we find ourselves in difficult or problematic situations."
"... when my husband and I are about to make a large purchase, such as a car, I chuckle within as the sales-person, usually a male, assumes I know nothing about finances. He proceeds to explain loan terms and other financial aspects of the deal. I go with the flow and watch his astonishment when he finds out that I am a certified public accountant with many years of experience" I'm not sure why this example was used. The salesperson was just doing their job. If this had occurred elsewhere (such as a meeting with a prospective client) it would of made a good argument against being a "know-it-all" tongue, but this was just in poor taste.
As a non-believer this book has some of it's truths, but when it gets tied into the judeo-christian bible, it quickly loses it's effect for me. For example, the quote "Know that all lies
originate with Satan. Period" has no meaning for me. On the topic of Satan, one truly amazing thing about this 30 Days to Taming Your Tongue is that it rarely blames Satan for the negative things you are doing. It does have it's moments doing that, but it few and far between. Sometimes, your problems are of your own doing, not Satan.
I think that this book would be good for those who need a spark-note like jump off point for a spur of the moment vesper, but not for reading all the way through, especially in one setting as you will quickly spot the redundancies and conflicting advice.
July 26, 2009
Deborah Smith Pegues has prepared a short, biblically-based guidebook for controlling language and responses in personal and business settings. She’s presented the information in a manner suitable for any learning level in 30 quick chapters. Each chapter addresses a different sin or serious office-place screw-up a person can commit with the tongue—lying, manipulating, slandering, being rude, being discouraging, being loquacious, etc. The book concludes with a “Daily Tongue Evaluation” checklist, a list of alternative uses for the tongue such as expressing gratitude or offering assistance, and a host of scriptures/Bible verses that inspire a person to success in “taming” the tongue.
The premise of this book is excellent. As a person who used prayer to overcome the use of angry language during some particularly trying years of my life, I know that the author has a valid concept. Someone without my experience or belief might be turned off by Smith Pegues’s confessions—I found them disconcerting at times and even stopped to check her credentials about a third of the way through the chapters. (Rest assured, she’s a certified behavioral consultant.) I have to admit to being surprised by her use of family members’ negative behaviors for illustrations, but she was cautious not to name people in the majority of her examples and that’s laudable.
Anyone looking for good, positive information/ideas on how to curb responses, reactions, language, and attitudes toward others will find something useful in this book, something to help learn how to employ new responses and attitudes in personal interactions and business settings.
From Fantasy Author Sandy Lender
The premise of this book is excellent. As a person who used prayer to overcome the use of angry language during some particularly trying years of my life, I know that the author has a valid concept. Someone without my experience or belief might be turned off by Smith Pegues’s confessions—I found them disconcerting at times and even stopped to check her credentials about a third of the way through the chapters. (Rest assured, she’s a certified behavioral consultant.) I have to admit to being surprised by her use of family members’ negative behaviors for illustrations, but she was cautious not to name people in the majority of her examples and that’s laudable.
Anyone looking for good, positive information/ideas on how to curb responses, reactions, language, and attitudes toward others will find something useful in this book, something to help learn how to employ new responses and attitudes in personal interactions and business settings.
From Fantasy Author Sandy Lender
March 27, 2019
This book right here!!!! It was eye-opening!! It speaks to the power of the tongue and how we can negatively use our tongue in 30 different ways. Deborah walks us through the error of us using our tongues to destroy and damage. She also gives us proper ways to correct it. It is a quick-read because it is a devotional but you really have to read through it a few times to really take it in and apply it to your life. Great information and delivery! Definitely would recommend to the person who wants to take control over your tongue/mouth.
May 23, 2013
I did not think that it was helpful. It was a list of things with zero examples of what those things actually were. It did not teach you how to tame your tongue. It was just a list of terms that one should not do, with no explanation of what those terms were in action. To me it was a skeleton that never got any filling in and hoped that no one would notice. I don't need head knowledge. I need a how to guide (which is what this claimed to be). Disappointing.
February 1, 2019
A good, practical, and helpful book. It focuses on one type of "speech malfunction" for each day of the month, including things such as argumentativeness, meddling, retaliating, and loquaciousness (look that up in your Funk & Wagnalls!). A daily speech evaluation survey and list of memory verses are included at the end. Highly recommended.
Just as good the second read through.
Just as good the second read through.
September 29, 2015
30 Days to Taming Your Tongue is a good book to read. Did it take me 30 days to read this book? No. But I can definitely see myself rereading this sometime and actually taking 30 days to read it so I can ponder on each day's reading better. I loved how each day started with a Bible verse and ended with a short affirmation based of the day's reading. All in all, this is a pretty great book.
May 14, 2018
Not very relatable unless you are a devout Christian. It's difficult to take much away when the majority of the text is made up of often outdated biblical passages.
January 30, 2021
Tremendous book!
July 25, 2023
Essentially, this book was just a bunch of life experiences, terrible and unwarranted relationship advice, and Bible scriptures and stories held together in paperback format. The author clearly believes she is so incredibly smart, (much better and cleverer than us severely slow readers and people who are not her and her overly glorified husband) and that she is an amazing Catholic advocate. Another devout Catholic will find this book a much better read than I unfortunately did. She goes on and on, until she remembers that this is a how-to book, and end the chapter with a, "Oh yeah, here's a random affirmation that just tells you to not say bad stuff." I was hoping this would tell me actual steps to learn to hold my tongue. I genuinely feel sorry for her coworkers, because to me, she sounds like a stuck-up, condescending, religion-obsessed old woman. The small amounts of actual advice given was somewhat contradicting, to be honest. This book is also slightly sexist, but alas, this book is written by a Deborah Smith Pegues. Enough said.
Some pros, to match the cons? This book has about two or three actual good points out of a 130 paged book. Lots of patience needed to find them, but they're there. Somewhere. Then we have- oh. I wish I could say more.
I don't think I am the target audience, what with my age, interests, and my waning faith as a fellow Catholic, but then again, I am, because of my age and my mouth in which checks all the boxes on what she is TRYING to help with. This review probably proves I needed to read this book, but all in all, this was not the read for me. We need our mouths to be realistic, and sometimes funny people in society. (Being cynical isn't necessarily a bad thing, it's just an adjective that serves as an opposite to "optimistic".) I guess this means I am fairly content in being a "Doubtful Debbie", and that I am not "Da Bomb" (Cringe, yes, but if ykyk). In conclusion, no thanks.
Some pros, to match the cons? This book has about two or three actual good points out of a 130 paged book. Lots of patience needed to find them, but they're there. Somewhere. Then we have- oh. I wish I could say more.
I don't think I am the target audience, what with my age, interests, and my waning faith as a fellow Catholic, but then again, I am, because of my age and my mouth in which checks all the boxes on what she is TRYING to help with. This review probably proves I needed to read this book, but all in all, this was not the read for me. We need our mouths to be realistic, and sometimes funny people in society. (Being cynical isn't necessarily a bad thing, it's just an adjective that serves as an opposite to "optimistic".) I guess this means I am fairly content in being a "Doubtful Debbie", and that I am not "Da Bomb" (Cringe, yes, but if ykyk). In conclusion, no thanks.
February 13, 2025
I read this book myself, then suggested to my husband that we read it together over the course of 30 days. We’re familiar with the benefits derived from fasting food as a spiritual discipline, but hadn’t considered a 30 day tongue fast as the author recommends in the Prologue.
I like the analogy shared by the author: words are the vehicle by which we communicate and the tongue is the driver.
I applaud Deborah Smith Pegues for writing this book. Her subtitle: What You Say (and Don’t Say) Will Improve Your Relationships, is for Christians and non-Christians alike, and people of all ages and walks of life.
Day 1 begins with The Lying Tongue and the scripture verse from Proverbs 12:22: The Lord detests lying lips, but he delights in men who are truthful.
Ouch, a small white lie is still a lie. One can easily see how important it is to be mindful of what comes out of our mouths, and the impact our words have on those that hear them. .
Imagine, 30 negative uses of the tongue, each backed up with Scripture. That being said, the book provides opportunity to change those negative uses into positive ones.
As I read through the book, recollections came to mind of my own negative uses of my tongue. Times when I gossiped, was hasty in my response, and several others. I had to stop reading and say, “Lord, I’m so sorry for that, please forgive me.” This book opened my eyes to see areas where I could make better use of my tongue. And in the days ahead, I will strive to do just that!
The book has useful resources at the back to help readers in their efforts to tame their tongues. Yes, daily diligence is required in order to be mindful of the words we’re about to say, before we open our mouths to speak.
Another great book to add to by Faith Library.
I like the analogy shared by the author: words are the vehicle by which we communicate and the tongue is the driver.
I applaud Deborah Smith Pegues for writing this book. Her subtitle: What You Say (and Don’t Say) Will Improve Your Relationships, is for Christians and non-Christians alike, and people of all ages and walks of life.
Day 1 begins with The Lying Tongue and the scripture verse from Proverbs 12:22: The Lord detests lying lips, but he delights in men who are truthful.
Ouch, a small white lie is still a lie. One can easily see how important it is to be mindful of what comes out of our mouths, and the impact our words have on those that hear them. .
Imagine, 30 negative uses of the tongue, each backed up with Scripture. That being said, the book provides opportunity to change those negative uses into positive ones.
As I read through the book, recollections came to mind of my own negative uses of my tongue. Times when I gossiped, was hasty in my response, and several others. I had to stop reading and say, “Lord, I’m so sorry for that, please forgive me.” This book opened my eyes to see areas where I could make better use of my tongue. And in the days ahead, I will strive to do just that!
The book has useful resources at the back to help readers in their efforts to tame their tongues. Yes, daily diligence is required in order to be mindful of the words we’re about to say, before we open our mouths to speak.
Another great book to add to by Faith Library.
February 2, 2020
Quotes:
Wise people don’t make a show of their knowledge.
“Engaging in deceitfulness is a slap in God’s face and has dire consequences. When we make a choice not to trust Him to handle a situation, we, in essence, decide He is a liar and will renege on His promise to meet every need. We then proceed to make our own way by any means necessary—even being deceptive. In doing so we forfeit the good life God had planned for us.”
― Deborah Smith Pegues, 30 Days to Taming Your Tongue
My Thoughts:
The best way I can describe 30 Days to Taming Your Tongue is a 3D in book form. It will pop up at you with the truth. Again most of the books that I have chosen to read throughout this year are books that will help me become better, and once again, another book that really takes you to a place of self-analysis. It makes you question yourself, "Are the words I am about to say words that will uplift or idle words"?
This book falls under the devotional category. It is intended to be read daily for 30 days. However, I read it straight through, which is an option as well. It is an easy read and can be finished within a couple of hours. Each day represents a type of tongue that can produce negative and toxic verbal communication.
What I liked most: The author uses humor, anecdotes, and scripturally based affirmations. I also appreciate the tips she offers on how to overcome.. I appreciate
Appendix A Daily Tongue Eval Checklist
Appendix B Alternative Uses for the Tongue
Appendix C Arsenal of Tongue Scripture
What I liked least:
Rating 4 out 5
Wise people don’t make a show of their knowledge.
“Engaging in deceitfulness is a slap in God’s face and has dire consequences. When we make a choice not to trust Him to handle a situation, we, in essence, decide He is a liar and will renege on His promise to meet every need. We then proceed to make our own way by any means necessary—even being deceptive. In doing so we forfeit the good life God had planned for us.”
― Deborah Smith Pegues, 30 Days to Taming Your Tongue
My Thoughts:
The best way I can describe 30 Days to Taming Your Tongue is a 3D in book form. It will pop up at you with the truth. Again most of the books that I have chosen to read throughout this year are books that will help me become better, and once again, another book that really takes you to a place of self-analysis. It makes you question yourself, "Are the words I am about to say words that will uplift or idle words"?
This book falls under the devotional category. It is intended to be read daily for 30 days. However, I read it straight through, which is an option as well. It is an easy read and can be finished within a couple of hours. Each day represents a type of tongue that can produce negative and toxic verbal communication.
What I liked most: The author uses humor, anecdotes, and scripturally based affirmations. I also appreciate the tips she offers on how to overcome.. I appreciate
Appendix A Daily Tongue Eval Checklist
Appendix B Alternative Uses for the Tongue
Appendix C Arsenal of Tongue Scripture
What I liked least:
Rating 4 out 5
July 23, 2020
The book makes the assumption that the reader not only believes in God, but that (as written as an affirmation for the reader), “Because God is in control of every aspect of my life and has set my destiny, I have no need to control the behavior of others.” Now, I’m not religious, but I enjoyed thinking critically about the scriptures and the lessons taught, for the fact that the reasoning of this book is largely based off of religious beliefs. I recommend reading it for this critically thinking. I found myself thinking about which of these “tongues” I use. It was annoying that most times, Pegues referred to people with male pronouns.
Backstory: I remember giving a speech a few years ago somewhere. My (devoutly Muslim) grandfather gave me this book the day after. 13 years old and sensitive, I was somewhat offended and took it as a message regarding my speech. I was even more annoyed when I opened the book to find Bible scriptures written all over it, deciding it was another medium for him to bring more faith into my life. I’m glad I waited a bit before reading the book.
Backstory: I remember giving a speech a few years ago somewhere. My (devoutly Muslim) grandfather gave me this book the day after. 13 years old and sensitive, I was somewhat offended and took it as a message regarding my speech. I was even more annoyed when I opened the book to find Bible scriptures written all over it, deciding it was another medium for him to bring more faith into my life. I’m glad I waited a bit before reading the book.
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