Love Unending is set up as a 21 day challenge, with each chapter discussing a particular marriage pitfall and a suggestion for addressing it that particular day. I'm not really sure why it's designed this way. I suppose these types of "challenges" are popular these days (Hard 75, Whole 30) but if Thompson explained the reason behind the number 21 specifically I cannot recall it. In any case, I read the book with a fun group of ladies who meet at my house for coffee each Tuesday, so we spread the 21 day challenge over a 10 week period and worked on two pitfalls per week.
Like Becky Thompson, I have been blessed with a great example of marriage from my parents. It certainly isn't perfect, but they have loved and served each other well for over 40 years and I have no doubt that many good things about my own marriage can be accredited to them and their positive example. On the other hand, if I brought up the specific ways my dad loves, serves, and treats my mom to Eddie as often as Becky Thompson does in her book, I think Eddie would throw the book in my face, tell me to go marry my dad, and walk out. There's a fine line between admiring the way your dad did things and emasculating your husband, and frankly I think Becky Thompson crossed it.
Here's the thing. Becky Thompson is around my age. We've probably been married for about the same length of time. I don't want to say we know nothing, because I certainly have learned some things in my last 10 years, but our advice isn't yet seasoned by test of time. Thompson continually returns to her dad's exceptional performance because she just doesn't have the experience to draw solely on her own marriage. Her advice isn't wrong, it's just too soon.
I think this would have been an excellent blog post, or possibly an article in some Christian women's magazine. But presented as a book, it felt like Thompson struggled to fill the pages.
Does this mean I failed the 21 day challenge?