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You Make Me Feel Like an Unnatural Woman: Diary of an Older Mother
A humorous and honest look at pregnancy and motherhood from an over-forty first-time mother reflects on her and her husband's long and difficult struggle to become parents, the instant joy and long and difficult bout with the side effects of pregnancy, the birth process, coming to terms with changes that new parenthood brings, and more. 35,000 first printing.
320 pages, Hardcover
First published April 21, 2004
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Displaying 1 - 22 of 22 reviews
March 15, 2010
Newman is obviously privileged, possibly narcisstic, and apparently deranged. But also funny. Her chaotic life, which she's very open and matter-of-fact about, made me feel better about the lesser wreckage of mine. Though I wouldn't make her choices of choose her life(multiple rounds of IVF, husband lives separately, twin infants and a nanny in a 750 square foot apartment, and money money money flowing out everywhere), she made me laugh. And read bits out loud to my husband, who fortunately lives in our house with me and our child.
Short, funny, entertaining, and mildly disturbing.
Short, funny, entertaining, and mildly disturbing.
January 2, 2010
I made it about halfway through this memoir of privileged late motherhood before throwing in the towel. Perhaps if I was a rich, New York, $250 per day nanny-having woman who thinks it's just fine that her husband MOVES OUT of the apartment as a response to the birth of their twins, then this would be the book for me. I should have judged a book by its cover in this case.
April 16, 2008
Apparently I will read anything with "mother" in the title right now. But the author is another league of mother - the kind who can afford a babynurse at $250 a day and then a full-time nanny, two apartments in NY, a "sophisticated" marriage with a much older man who lives in a separate apartment and has vowed he will never change a diaper or bathe their kids - this after going through rounds and rounds of IVF with her. A freelance writer can afford all this? On the plus side, she is apparently friends with Nigella Lawson and for that, I am deeply envious. The nanny would be nice too.
November 1, 2017
Awesome reader
November 7, 2017
I love her wicked sense of humor!
September 11, 2007
First of all, Judith Newman is honest, and fearless. She doesn't pull any punches, and hardly changes names. It's difficult not to admire someone who can be one of the few people to paint both the good and the bad aspects of conquering infertility, and keep her sense of humor.
As a woman who went through IVF and late-life motherhood myself, I consider this book essential reading. While Newman admits she put off motherhood for reasons other than infertility, the ensuing treatments and desire for motherhood drive her forward. It is clear that she desired a child because of her biological clock and, perhaps, as an accessory, but by the time her twins are born and she falls head first into their care, her love for them is apparent.
Judith Newman exists in a successful Manhattan world where people have children late in life, only to have the nannies take the children to birthday parties and Mommy & Me classes. There is competition among the nannies, there are private parks with keys, and waiting lists for the chicest pre-schools. Newman is more hands-on with her children, however she does employ a Jamaican nanny with whom she conflicts regularly. Still, she takes her own children out and to parties, and tries her best to raise them without her husband, a man 25 years her senior who, although an active participant in the IVF, is virtually absent from the children's lives. Newman and her husband even share separate apartments, and she spares no bile toward her husband, although she can be charitable.
This book is not for people who like things sugar-coated. Although I have been through much of what she has been through, the world she lives in is so different from mine, I couldn't relate to all of her experiences. One doesn't need to have a sense of what she went through, I think, to truly appreciate what she has to say. The book is written with caustic wit and honesty, and I admire her for her courage.
As a woman who went through IVF and late-life motherhood myself, I consider this book essential reading. While Newman admits she put off motherhood for reasons other than infertility, the ensuing treatments and desire for motherhood drive her forward. It is clear that she desired a child because of her biological clock and, perhaps, as an accessory, but by the time her twins are born and she falls head first into their care, her love for them is apparent.
Judith Newman exists in a successful Manhattan world where people have children late in life, only to have the nannies take the children to birthday parties and Mommy & Me classes. There is competition among the nannies, there are private parks with keys, and waiting lists for the chicest pre-schools. Newman is more hands-on with her children, however she does employ a Jamaican nanny with whom she conflicts regularly. Still, she takes her own children out and to parties, and tries her best to raise them without her husband, a man 25 years her senior who, although an active participant in the IVF, is virtually absent from the children's lives. Newman and her husband even share separate apartments, and she spares no bile toward her husband, although she can be charitable.
This book is not for people who like things sugar-coated. Although I have been through much of what she has been through, the world she lives in is so different from mine, I couldn't relate to all of her experiences. One doesn't need to have a sense of what she went through, I think, to truly appreciate what she has to say. The book is written with caustic wit and honesty, and I admire her for her courage.
July 17, 2009
A $1 Housingworks Sale find. An easy read that I devoured quickly.
This book chronicles the struggles of a woman trying to get pregnant in her 40s. She has twins and the book continues until they're ~20 months old. She lives in Manhattan, apparently in our neighborhood.
My favorite passage is about her trying to get a key to the NYU residential playground, the one we could have access to if we had kids because we're NYU residents. She describes the real estate manager exactly as I imagine her to be when Shawn describes the woman he deals with (Shawn's pretty sure it's not the same woman):
From earlier in the book, a thought on marriage that cracked me up: "Men look at marriages as a contract: you change, you break the contract. Women look at marriage as a screen play. You change? Call in a rewrite!"
I can't say I'd recommend going to any effort to find and read this book (unless you are struggling with infertility - I think success stories of similar problems would probably be welcome then ... and this is well written and funny and touching), but if you happen across it, definitely work a buck.
This book chronicles the struggles of a woman trying to get pregnant in her 40s. She has twins and the book continues until they're ~20 months old. She lives in Manhattan, apparently in our neighborhood.
My favorite passage is about her trying to get a key to the NYU residential playground, the one we could have access to if we had kids because we're NYU residents. She describes the real estate manager exactly as I imagine her to be when Shawn describes the woman he deals with (Shawn's pretty sure it's not the same woman):
"[The Key Park:] is controlled by a bureaucrat in one of NYU's real estate management offices who gives out keys by whim, a woman I know nothing about. But as my frustration has grown I have become fond of ascribing her new identities and new levels of insanity. Most recently I decided she was someone who owns many, many parakeets."
From earlier in the book, a thought on marriage that cracked me up: "Men look at marriages as a contract: you change, you break the contract. Women look at marriage as a screen play. You change? Call in a rewrite!"
I can't say I'd recommend going to any effort to find and read this book (unless you are struggling with infertility - I think success stories of similar problems would probably be welcome then ... and this is well written and funny and touching), but if you happen across it, definitely work a buck.
July 2, 2013
I have very mixed feelings about this book. It made me laugh and laugh - Judith Newman is an incredibly funny writer and has a wonderful way with words. While You Make Me Feel Like an Unnatural Woman is a humorous read, and it was evident that Newman was struggling with her new role as mother, with her finances, and her marriage, she never really went too deep below the surface. She allows you glimpses of her actual thoughts, but doesn't write with any depth. There is nothing wrong with this, necessarily, just don't pick it up if you're looking for a mothering memoir that deals with the meat of being a mom and how it changes your identity.
I originally read this for my thesis (I'm reviewing a number of mothering memoirs) specifically because she is an older mom, and there aren't many mothering memoirs out there dealing with age. I'm not sure I can use it though as Newman never really went to any deep emotional place. I'm not sure how I didn't know it wouldn't be more serious, certainly the title should've tipped me off!
This is a thoroughly enjoyable read, and you'll certainly have fun if you're a parent yourself, especially a new(ish) parent living in NYC.
I originally read this for my thesis (I'm reviewing a number of mothering memoirs) specifically because she is an older mom, and there aren't many mothering memoirs out there dealing with age. I'm not sure I can use it though as Newman never really went to any deep emotional place. I'm not sure how I didn't know it wouldn't be more serious, certainly the title should've tipped me off!
This is a thoroughly enjoyable read, and you'll certainly have fun if you're a parent yourself, especially a new(ish) parent living in NYC.
January 26, 2011
(Non-Fiction, New Mother Memoir) Judith Newman lives a life that I will never live. She lives in New York City, she is married to an older man but doesn't live with him, she has a dog-walker, and a nanny. Oh, and she lives in an apartment, but purchases the one above hers with the hopes of combining the two. Despite our lifestyle differences, her diary was such a great read while I was getting up 3 times a night to feed my little one. She openly shares her fertility journey, her at-times struggling marriage, and her experiences raising twin boys at the age of 41. Her diary is full of wit, honesty, and funny observations of her baby boys. She inspired me to find the humor in sleep-deprived world of living with an infant. She has a constant wonder of her boys, even with they are acting crazy. All mothers could probably use a reminder to live in state of wonder, not only with our children, but with each day.
December 4, 2007
Just read this. I loved every bit of it.
A forty-year-old who struggled with fertility for seven years, finds herself pregnant with twin boys. This is her story for their first 20 months and how she really feels as a human and successful, intelligent woman. It does focus on her more than her children which is super nice. I read this book because I stumbled upon an article Newman had written about being married for 14 years but not sharing a home with her husband. Ever. The article was well-written and I just had to get this book.
She is sharp and bitingly witty.
A forty-year-old who struggled with fertility for seven years, finds herself pregnant with twin boys. This is her story for their first 20 months and how she really feels as a human and successful, intelligent woman. It does focus on her more than her children which is super nice. I read this book because I stumbled upon an article Newman had written about being married for 14 years but not sharing a home with her husband. Ever. The article was well-written and I just had to get this book.
She is sharp and bitingly witty.
August 14, 2012
This book was a running list of diary entries starting from when the author was trying to conceive until her twin sons were 20 months old. Would have been nice to have chapters instead of just endless text. I thought the parts about the author going through infertility treatments was too small. She could have expanded her story into a humorous book about infertility, especially how she got her reluctant husband to do his part. Still, I enjoyed how the author described her twin sons, one big for his age and one scrawny. I can't imagine raising them in a 750 sq. foot apartment.
November 18, 2014
Agree with others that if you are a 40 year old wealthy New Yorker with celebrity friends and an odd sense of reality, this might be the book for you. If you are an older mother looking for understanding or insight, skip it. She hasn't a clue what anyone else feels or thinks except for herself. Read about 50% of it as I kept thinking it might get better but it doesn't. Don't waste your time.
December 20, 2017
Další z knížek, které popisují, co se stane po porodu s životem normální pracující ženy. V tomhle případě navíc obohacené o to, že čerstvá maminka je čtyřicátnice, jejímu manželovi je o 25 let víc a mají dvojčata, takže dvojitá dávka emocí, starostí a radostí :) je to psáno vtipně, s nadhledem, a hlavně s láskou.
November 22, 2016
This book was fun. Judith writes well and it is light enough for a fast read. For full disclosure - I live in the same building as her in NYC and know the children and John on sight so the story probably entertained me more than it might others. A good book for a New Yorker needing a bit of brain relaxation.
March 10, 2008
A book I bought when I was going through my period of infertility. When I got pregnant I almost decided not to read it - I'm glad I didn't. I enjoyed the author's voice and a look at her more alternative family. A good Momma-encouragement book.
August 10, 2009
I would have liked this book more if they characters weren't really people. I know you don't have to like your characters but I really don't get this woman. Her writing is good and part of it is funny, but she upset me at the same time.
August 6, 2010
LOVED it! Hilarious - had to read it out loud to my husband who found it very funny as well. Reading while expecting twins (first trimester = full of nausea) made me appreciate it probably even more than I would otherwise.
March 31, 2015
Hilarious. I loved it.
December 9, 2009
Entertaining. I laughed out loud a lot.
December 20, 2017
Sehr humorvoll und abwechslungsreich geschrieben - lustig und kurzweilig zu lesen! Und einfach ein niedliches Thema..
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August 22, 2012Not too interesting, not too funny... Infertility journal quite depressing.
January 6, 2015
I just love Judith Newman's work and I found this book hilarious.
Displaying 1 - 22 of 22 reviews