Mother Teresa's Advice for Jilted Lovers

by Donna Barker

Mother Teresa’s Advice for Jilted Lovers is a hilarious, irreverent take on the darker side of spirituality. 

Every time Tara Holland thinks she’s getting close to finally having her white wedding, the man who should be on his knee, giving her roses, winds up on his back, pushing up daisies. Needless to say, Tara’s beginning to think she’s cursed when it comes to men. 

Her best friend, Betsy, who’s always there to put the pieces back together, convinces Tara she’s the cause of each of her boyfriend’s untimely exits to the other side. Could it be that Tara has that kind of psychic power? And is Betsy right that women all over the world would pay a pretty penny for it?

What follows is a wild and humorous trek down the path of Tara’s spiritual growth and ultimate awakening. But the road to enlightenment is no cakewalk. It’s fraught with stacks of ill-gotten cash, death threats, and orange jumpsuits.

Genres: Romance, Mystery, Canada

301 pages, Paperback

First published January 6, 2016

About the author

Donna Barker is a career non-fiction ghostwriter and curriculum creator whose work has won national awards (which other people get to show on their shelves). She has also written award-winning fiction under the penname Danika Bloom.

Donna is the co-founder of The Creative Academy for Writers with her author pals Eileen Cook and Crystal (CJ) Hunt. With Eileen and Crystal, she is the editor of books in the *Creative Academy Guides For Writers* series.

When she's not wearing her Danika Bloom persona, Donna leads a weekly mastermind group for writers, edits creative non-fiction, and does her best to only put on 'leaving the house clothes' once a week.

Join her free writer's community for support on your own writing adventure at http://creativeacademyforwriters.com/.

Reviews

[Donna Barker]

well, I wrote it, so I think it's pretty good!

[Kayce Hughlett]

So many books, so little time. This one is worth making time to read! I met author Donna Barker at a Writers Conference and she offered to send me an advance read copy of Mother Teresa's Advice. I loaded it on my iPad and headed off to Paris for my own adventure. By day, I strolled through the streets of Paris and Provence. By night, I curled up with the delightful twists and turns of "Mother Teresa." Donna's creativity and fresh storyline leave me rather wordless... and I'm a writer. A few, however, rise to the top like steam on a café crème: Fresh. Innovative. Funny. Spiritual. Quirky. Mysterious. Relatable. A fun, must-read romp that left me wanting to know what's next. Always a good sign, in my humble opinion. ;)

[Jacqui Nelson]

Best friends Tara and Betsy's journey toward psychic enlightenment is a hilarious, terrifying and heartwarming roller-coaster ride. The power of positive and negative energy becomes crystal clear on the pages of Ms Baker's unique debut novel. The locations of Vancouver and San Diego were painted with talented prose, but it is the landscape of the heart and soul that makes this story truly shine.

I received an ARC in exchange for an honest review.

[Kimberly]

Donna's book was multidimensional, creative, and original. I thought Betsy and Tara's relationship bordered co-dependency but it seemed to work throughout the book. I loved the references from the four agreements.

[Robin Morgan]

What woman doesn’t live for the day she’ll walk down the aisle wearing a gorgeous white wedding gown to begin her happy ever after? And the only nightmare she dreads coming true is being left at the altar alone with her man disappearing to parts unknown; and after which she begins to wonder whether or not she’s been the cause of her situation.

Imagine if you will if the reason for your true love’s no show had been his sudden demise? Wouldn’t you feel as if fate didn’t want you to marry this guy? But suppose each time you’ve fallen in love with some guy he had died as well, wouldn’t you begin to believe you’ve been cursed when it came to the game of love? I know I would and I would feel the same sort of helplessness Tara Hudson felt.

Now, if you can feel this same sort of helplessness, then you’ll be able to step into Tara Hudson’s shoes, because this is precisely how she feels when it comes to her happiness and relationships regarding men. And if you were in Tara’s shoes wouldn’t the last you’ll want or need is to have your best friend, the one who you could always depend on tell you that “You’re the reason behind your own situation and the men in your life are dying.” The reason I’m saying this is because this is precisely what Tara’s best friend, Betsy, is telling her.

Perhaps what Tara needs is to find some sort of spiritual path and self-discovery to find what’s wrong in the life she’s living. And if you’ve ever tried doing this, then you’ll know it’s not as easy as it seems as there will be countless hurdles you’ll have to leap, and obstacles you must get around.

Will Tara be able to reach the land of bliss she’s so desperately trying to find; and if she does, will she get the happy ever after which has passed her by for so long. The answers are in the book.

The book is wrought with dark humor and other of the author’s characters can best be described as being somewhat pathetic, Tara is delight when compared with them; which is why I’ve giving Ms. Barker 5 STAR for her endeavor here.

I received a e-book copy of this book from a giveaway the author had on LibraryThing, and the above has been my honest opinion.

[T. Mitchell]

Mother Teresa’s Advice For Jilted Lovers is a hilarious, irreverent take on the darker side of spirituality. Tara Holland finds herself broken-hearted from yet another love affair gone wrong. The last guy was merely a jerk, but the other three mysteriously up and died on her. Needless to say, Tara’s beginning to think she’s cursed when it comes to men. Her best friend, Betsy, who’s always there to put the pieces back together with enough herbal remedies to open up a health food store, convinces Tara she’s the cause of each of her boyfriend’s untimely exit to the other side. Could it be that Tara has that kind of psychic power?

What follows is a wild and humorous trek down the path of Tara’s spiritual growth and ultimate awakening. But the road to enlightenment is no cakewalk. It’s fraught with self-doubt, suspicion and betrayal. This is a must read. Donna Barker has created an entertaining story full of heart, humor and meaningful messages.

Note: I received this manuscript as a beta reader before the novel's release.

[Julie]

What a fun and quirky book! I really loved the main character. I think many can relate to Tara's struggle with God through organized religion. At risk of spoiling anything, I will just say I love the spiritual journey she took even though discovering her power within through her business was definitely offbeat. Well, I suppose I should say the business was offbeat. Ha. The entire premise of the book engaged me from the beginning and carried me throughout. If you're looking for a creative and original book to read, this is the one!

I received an ARC in exchange for an honest review.

[Cindy]

Very interesting read and not at all what expected. Some of the character lines were visible early on in the story but did not detract from the story itself. Well formed plots with some comedic attributes. Very enjoyable.

[Cherie O'Boyle]

Unusual plot, exceptionally well-written. Riches here for all readers. The story has elements that will appeal to everyone who has ever loved, been lost, felt betrayed, or enjoyed hope renewed.

[James Knight]

Donna Barker’s genre-defying book, Mother Teresa’s Advice for Jilted Lovers is a hidden treasure! It is a laugh-out-loud hilarious journey into the mind, especially the deliciously unique and highly creative mind of Ms. Barker. It is part murder mystery, part a thought-provoking spiritual journey into the conflict between good and evil, part heart-warming romance, part an exploration of friendship gone wrong, part a self-help spiritual healing advice book, and all infused with dark humor and brilliant and highly original and creative writing.

Tara and Betsy are life-long friends and were former roommates. Betsy has always been the alpha-female with Tara happy to play the subservient role. Tara’s love-life seems to be cursed. Her lovers seem to all experience very different accidental deaths. Tara has a chance encounter with a guy named Glen who she knew in high school and they soon become lovers and Tara thinks that she has finally found the perfect man for her. Then he ghosts her without explanation.

Betsy moves back in with Tara and convinces Tara that she has psychic powers and that she was responsible for the deaths of her former boyfriends. Since both are struggling financially, Betsy convinces Tara that she could use her psychic powers, with the help of her amethyst named Bob (given to her by one of her former dead lovers named Bob), to give relationship advice to other romantically troubled women who were having a conflict with a boyfriend or husband. After an early struggle, they change their business model and their business becomes wildly successful beyond their expectations.

Without providing any “spoilers”, the pace of the book really picks up with wild and hilarious and twisted tales of their Mother Teresa’s Advice adventures. Eventually, the business relationship and the friendship between Tara and Betsy soon goes off the rails. Glen reunites with Tara and provides some information that that makes Tara aware of some things that she had only vaguely suspected previously but which explains the accidental deaths of Tara’s other boyfriends. To this point in the book, the action had been set in Vancouver. Now, Tara and Glen go on a road trip to Sacramento, CA without informing Betsy.

While in Sacramento, Glen is injured in what appears to be an accident and they both come to a full revelation of psychic events that have been going on for years and which were far more extensive than initially realized. Thanks to Betsy “turning the tables” on Tara, Tara ends up being arrested and more adventures await during her incarceration.

I truly loved everything about this book. The main characters are quirky but well developed and vividly described. The plot is well paced, innovative, unique and, the psychic aspects aside, human and believable. The dialogue is witty and at times, belly-laugh funny. The writing is crisp and engaging. All in all, this is a fabulous book that I totally enjoyed reading and am pleased to give it my highest possible endorsement.

I received a copy of the book compliments of the author. My review is provided voluntarily.

[Kat]

Advance Reader's Copy was given by the author in exchange for my honest review.


The thing that caught my attention and made me curious about this book is the synopsis of the story of Tara and how every boyfriend she've had died without her doing anything. At first I was like, "Is this a paranormal or something?" and "This story is so weird, different and confusing but still, it seems interesting." Also, what caught my attention the most is the "rebel romance" description Donna gave to this book. I mean, what's that, right? It was new to my ears 'cause I've never heard of it. So when Donna offered and asked for reviews to this book, I agreed immediately. What could go wrong trying out a different genre, right?




Tara's wondering why her ex boyfriends were suddenly dying without her doing anything to kill them. When she told her best friend, Betsy, about it, she figured it was because she might have some kind power. Later on, Betsy then realized that Tara's power could help other women and could get them a lot of cash too. So, Betsy's idea? Create a website wherein Tara gives advice to women who are in desperate need of help and a really really good advice to follow and people pay for it.
Secrets are revealed and friendship gets broken.



Guess what? I was right! This is one heck of a great and interesting book! At first, I thought the pacing of the book was really slow but as I went on, I realized how much important these details were! It was so creative and fresh! Nothing I've ever read before! Now that's a great book!



I have this love & hate thing to Betsy's character at first. Her straightforwardness is great but the way she pressures Tara most of the time is annoying and ugh! But as the story went by, I seriously hate her! Why? Well, the fact that she lied to Tara and accusing her of killing her ex boyfriends pisses me off since she's the one who did those things. Ugh! I knew from the start that something was really wrong with her character.

You know what I loved the most about this book? The dreams! Yes, the dreams-the vision Tara has to solve the problem! It's just so amazing! But quite heavy to deal with since it's a big responsibility and I don't like those kinds of big responsibilities.


I am so looking forward in reading the next book (if there is)! I was not satisfied with the ending! What happened next?!
So, I think that explains the lack of 1 star. But overall, it's a really good read! I recommend it to those who are looking for new books to read and want one that has a "different kind of genre"

Thank you, Donna for giving me a chance to read and review your book!

[Marielle]

Quirky, original page turner about what could happen if The Secret became true.

This was a freebee on Amazon when I got this a while back, and it had been calling out to me from my TBR ever since. I'm glad I started this. And I hope more people will too. My rating? I've rounded up because things a well written, daring, original debut that I think deserved it.

While thinking about how to rate this, I'm struck again with how much I depend on putting things in neat little boxes and not finding - or knowing - of a box to put this lovely, original, quirky story in. And then I was struck by the thought that whatever I was going to write so that you, the reader of this review, would know what to expect, it probably was going to put you off, because, well, most people like to read books that fit into nice little boxes too. This author purposely went and written a blend that's never been done: religious self help mixed into a romance, suspense, mystery pack. Here here!

I am mostly a romance reader. And romance consists of a focus on a couple with a HEA at the end, most preferably with some hot sexy scenes thrown in, but not too much, otherwise it becomes erotica. Without the sexy scenes it almost immediately becomes a 'clean' romance with the stigma it's for super religious readers only. Suspense focusses on the solving of a puzzle and YA on, well, young adults.

This book would be a women's fiction, I guess. It's not mainly about the romance, although it does play a large part. It's not mainly on the solving of a puzzle, although yes... It has sex, but of the closed door varierty, with a single first person POV which gives it a YA-feel, but without the young adults. It is however a coming of age book in that it has a heroine striving to become her true person and finding what she does best.

Mweh, I hear some readers of this review thinking. The great part about this book however is that it does all of the above, but in a way that's truly fresh. I mean, look at the title alone. And it's not a holy book, but in fact the title is the name of a business the heroine started and made a lot of money with. It's also a book about opposites, bad and good and grey.

So, when you're in a slumb or when you like to try something new on a more regular basis, try this.

[Kathy]

I received this from Library Thing for an honest review. This is a real quirky book, with an interesting, somewhat creative plot. Tara Holland has a tough time with men. Every time she thinks she is close to commitment, the man in her life ends up dead. Thus, she thinks she is jinxed. However, her best friend Betsy convinces her she has an unusual psychic gift that allows her to cause a man’s untimely demise. Both women team up to start a psychic business to help women everywhere solve their problems with “bad” guys. The result is a fast but funny romp through their lives and their psychic business of helping “damaged” women get rid of the “damager”, i.e. their guy. I think the author settled on the name Mother Teresa mostly because it would draw in potential readers, since I really found no reason for using this particular name in the book. In addition, I am not sure the fantastic rate of speed for their business to grow was all that realistic or the death and dying of various men everywhere without much investigation, but, in a book such as this one (or possibly many other fictional books), when did the question of whether the book is realistic become an issue of importance? I enjoyed reading this sassy romp through the ups and downs of the psychic helping business the two women started successfully, as well about Tara’s positive growth as the book proceeded. I did not like her teammate Betsy all that much from the get-go, but then, she was the villain in the book. I also found the plot evolution a bit choppy, as it didn’t flow all that smoothly for me. However, this book does belong right up there with the best of them. The name and business concept in the book were fairly creative on the part of the author. I think anyone who enjoys a quick read that is funny yet filled with a good modicum of seriousness (e.g. Tara’s growth as that of her friendship with Betsy) will enjoy reading this book. The storyline moves quickly, is interesting and creative and does not get into any real sex and provides a solid look at friendship and the quirks of opening a business such as this one.

[Suzie Q]

This book definitely crosses several genres but that is one of the things I liked best about it. Some parts made me laugh, some parts kept me guessing, some parts had me wishing I had a guy like Glen or a friend like Tara, and some parts had me not able to put it down.
Personally I could relate to Tara's inner struggle with the religion she was brought up in versus the way she sees the world as an adult. Even though she considers herself a not very devoted atheist, she still feels a pull to the church she grew up in.
I have to say I didn't much care for Betsy from the beginning though. I liked that she was so outspoken as a child, but from the start she seemed to be too overbearing on Tara. Sure she was there with her survival/recovery kit whenever Tara was blue, but she seemed to take joy in Tara's pain in a way. I don't appreciate or trust friends or family who think they know what is best for you better than you know for yourself. Betsy was just way to controlling from the start.
I loved that Tara named her Amethyst Bob, spoke to it, and referred to it as a him. Let's just say I know a think or two about naming important inanimate objects, although mine are not named after spirit guides.
Without spoiling anything for anyone who hasn't read this book yet I love the way it ends with the tiniest hint that we haven't seen the last of these gals.
I appreciated the humor mixed with the darker stuff The book took a more mysterious turn than I was expecting and that was the point where i couldn't' put the book down until I found out how it was all going to turn out.
I will definitely be checking out the site mentioned in the afterword as well. And if there is a sequel, I will definitely be checking that out too!

[Abigail Davies]

I was given a copy of this book for an honest review.
Wow! I certainly didn't expect that! I read this book in one sitting. I thought I was going to read a 'traditional romance', well I was certainly wrong. Donna has a way of writing that captivates you, and transports you into her story so fully that it is almost impossible to pull your kindle away from your face.
Tara Holland has had really bad luck with men. Her past three lovers have all ended up dead. According to her best friend Betsy, Tara had some sort of connection to the universe and was killing them without even knowing about it.
As I was reading I was thinking "this best friend is crazy in the head". I didn't expect the turn of events, that actually Tara did have some sort of connection to the universe. She was all for using it for good. Cue Betsy to make money off it. Betsy clearly was using Tara to her own advantage. The twist that came towards the end was so unexpected it actually made me gasp! This whole book is full of twists and turns. I won't go into to much detail because I don't want to ruin the book for you. But I will say that if you fancy a very different and quirky read then this book is for you! if not then you still need to read this book!

[Danielle Fisher]

Thanks goes out to Barker for providing me with an ARC in exchange for an honest review.

This book started off very strong. I was hooked and engaged with the unique storytelling, interesting plot line, and engaging questions that I really wanted to continue to read to learn the answers to. I thought the characters were well-developed, the plot was strong and, for the most part, the book had a steady pace to it.

So why the loss of a star? Unfortunately, the best friend really did not sit well with me. In fact, I didn't see a single redeeming quality for most of the book. This is a very difficult personality clash when she was such a loud voice in the script. Again, COMPLETELY subjective. Barker is a strong writer who builds even stronger worlds and three dimensional characters, but there are certain characters that the reader may not mesh with. That has absolutely nothing to do with the author's writing ability or overall execution of the story line and plot, it's just a subjective opinion of a single reader.

I would recommend to readers interested in contemporary fiction and open to alternative practices, like meditation, crystals, and psychic perception. A great read!

[Michele Fogal]

I loved this book! It's quirky. It's weird. It's hilarious.

Barker creates a world a quarter turn towards magic realism where super powers of the mind are a real possibility and could be responsible for a string of odd ball accidents, coincidences that are stacking up a bit too high for normal mishaps.

There's romance, there's murder mystery, there's black humour, there's an irreverent spiritual journey and under it all, there's a subtle exploration of the difference between right and wrong and how each of us has to grow up a bit to bring that into focus.

Barker mentioned that this is a cross-genre blend of religious + self-help book, but I had a much harder time putting it into a category. I think I'd call it a comedy slasher romp, with a lack of any real horror, and a large side of outside-the-box.

A smooth read from start to finish, great pacing, compelling characters, a plot that keeps unspooling and some juicy twists to keep you jumping.

Bravo to Barker!

Note: I received an ARC of this novel, a pre-release copy

[Kerryn Reid]

First of all, I LOVE the title! Right off the bat, you know this book won’t be quite like anything you’ve read before.
Second, I love the premise! Singular, kooky, and much too fiendish for Tara Holland, the sweet, self-effacing, romantically bumbling protagonist.
I believe in the power of positive (and negative) thinking to influence our individual little worlds. But Ms. Barker has taken the notion to hilarious lengths. It could be a frightening sort of paranormal except that her approach is so refreshingly tongue-in-cheek. Where the book touches on serious issues, however, she treats them with respect and sensitivity. Just two minor complaints: I itched to give Tara a couple of kicks in the backside, and the wheels of justice moved unbelievably quickly. All in all, a delightful debut!
Note: I received an ARC in exchange for an honest review.

[Medavis66]

The path to spiritual enlightenment... is definitely NOT found in this book, but you will get a few laughs along the way. It has a kind of lopsided approach that is rather different and that is what kept me reading. Not much of what you expect in here and not a book easy to describe. Some things that happen are unfortunate and untimely, but the twist her best friend puts on things will get you thinking. A few parts didn't quite pan out or get explained like I imagined it hoped, but it was cute and original.

ARC provided in exchange for honest review.

[MaryAnn Clarke]

Thelma and Louise discover The Secret.

Barker's murder mystery, women's fiction, self help treatise is a genre mash-up like no other. Fast paced, witty, wry, clever, beguilingly mysterious and metaphysically challenging, even while being tongue in cheek and laugh out loud funny.

Someone just break your heart? Boyfriend behaving like a jerk? Thinking of swearing off men forever? This is the book for you. Buy a tub of Ben n Jerrys and a bottle of wine and settle in for a helluva ride.

[Virma]

Not what I expected....funny and twisted! Had me hooked from the start. Even though at times Tara, one of the main characters, could border on pathetic we always knew she was going to brought back to reality- it is chick-lit after all. I really liked the dark humor in this book. Some of us may have known early on what was going on but you were still hooked to see what was coming next. I'm definitely going to pass this one along as thumbs up!

[Soccergypsy]

** ARC provided by author in exchange for an honest review. **

Witty and quirky in the best possible ways. I laughed out loud numerous times and enjoyed the paranormal touch. The varying depths of true friendship and love and what one would do for, and to, another were wonderfully addressed. Beautiful teaser at the end. Highly recommend.

[Cheryl Montgomery-Nolan]

I loved this book! It starts out fairly light. Two women friends decide to help other women who are in bad relationships. Then it turns a bit scary! This is a really good read, and I loved that my hometown of Sacramento is mentioned. I received a free copy of this book in exchange for an honest review - and I'm so glad I did.

[Sharon Anderson]

Donna Barker's Mother Teresa's Advice for Jilted Lovers is a smart, funny book that sets up the protagonist with an impossible gift. I'm not going to spoil the fun, but know that I loved it! The writing is exceptional, the story is original, leaving me longing for the next book Ms. Barker publishes. Thank you!

[Deniz Soykurumcetin]

I can not recommend enough of this book. It is smart, hilarious. You will relate to the character in weird settings to your surprise. It is fun to read, but it makes you question your life too. I can not wait to read other books by this writer. I was busy, but I could not drop the book for a moment until I finish it.

[Dee Lancaster]

Fun! I enjoyed this book. Quirky and thoughtful. The main character is a much better person than I am. An unpredictable read. Recommended!

[LL]

Won on GFR and glad I did

[W.L. Hawkin]

What a cool book! The title had me guessing but once the author revealed what it was all about it made so much sense. The genre still has me guessing . . . dark twisted romantic comedy? There are definitely dark moments involving several murdered men, some of them even nice. But I smiled my way through most of this charming read. It revolves around a quirky love triangle between Tara (our hero), Betsy (her besty bi friend--good play on words), and Glen, Tara's lover. Basically, when Tara's third boyfriend dies, after she catches him messing around on her and gets mad at him, she begins to think she has the power to psychically kill men. Betsy introduces Tara to her spiritual world and the fun begins. The author has a blast with New Age stereotypes, but though I do psychic readings and use Motherpeace cards, I never felt mocked. I could only laugh. And when Tara turns her office into a meditation room, I started cleaning and looking at paint colors myself. I still might buy a beanbag meditation chair. Hmm . . . So, if you're looking for some smiles, some relief, and a light read, pick this one up. My only complaint is that I would have liked to have seen the antagonist brought to justice. But maybe that doesn't happen in romantic comedy. Maybe it's about happy (sort of) endings. I don't know. My killers generally don't walk away at the end of the book.

[Jason Lee]

An absolute delightful read from start to finish! I found myself not wanting to put the book down because I was addicted to finding out what happens to Tara and Betsy, yet I also didn't want the book to end because of how real the characters are. This book has a bit of everything: romance, spirituality, mystery, business & marketing and personal development, all of which is nicely paced in the book. I particularly enjoyed the quirky moments between Tara and Betsy and how their friendship is so relatable on so many levels. I think we all know someone in our lives who are like either Tara or Betsy.

Donna Barker cleverly weaves so many genres conveniently into her book. I found myself both entertained and educated which is so unique but she totally makes it work! If you're a budding entrepreneur struggling to get your business going, this book dabbles in it with nuggets of tips and inspiration. It's loaded with great stuff, including an ending that gives you an a-ha moment on how you see yourself and others. This book has it all and I highly recommend everyone to read MTAJL, you won't regret it. 5 out of 5 stars for the story and a perfect 5 to a highly gifted author.

[Sandra Lopez]

Tara was a jilted lover after realizing her boyfriend was cheating on her. She didn’t have a good track record for picking out good men. In fact, she was done with them.

Her friend was the alpha female and a bisexual fiend, and she urges her to forget about men but not about sex.

But then the cheating bastard dies—the third boyfriend to drop dead. Coincidence? Or was the universe at play here? What the heck were these broads talking about? Was Tara bad luck? Was she a grim reaper? What? This wasn’t making sense to me.