Memoirs of a Neurotic Zombie

Memoirs of a Neurotic Zombie #1

by Jeff Norton

'My name is Adam Meltzer and the last thing I remember was being stung by a bee while swinging at a robot-shaped pi�ata on my twelfth birthday. I was dead before the candy hit the ground.'





Memoirs of a Neurotic Zombie is narrated by the hilarious Adam Meltzer - pre-teen, worrywart, and now zombie. Adam's family gets the fright of their lives when he turns up at their door . . . three months after his funeral.


Soon Adam's back at school trying to fit in and not draw extra attention to himself, but when he sees his neighbour Ernesto transform into a chupacubra, and the beautiful Corina (Adam's number one mega-crush) turns out to be a (vegan) vampire, undead life is never going to be the same again.





A hilarious adventure caper - if Ferris Bueller met Shaun of the Dead - all about friendship and being yourself . . . even if you're undead.

Genres: Humor

256 pages, Paperback

First published August 5, 2014

About the author

Jeff is the author of the award-winning MetaWars series for young adult readers and 'Memoirs of a Neurotic Zombie' and 'Alienated: Grounded At Groom Lake' for middle-grade readers.

Jeff is also a writer and Executive Producer in television. He is the showrunner and EP of 'Finding Her Edge' for Netflix (based on the book by Jennifer Iacopelli). He is also the originating EP of 'Geek Girl' (based on the books by Holly Smale).

His new book series is 'Dino Knights', a chapter book series about brave knights riding into adventure on the backs of dinosaurs!

A reluctant reader as a youth, Jeff is passionate about creating stories that will turn reluctant readers into lifelong ones.

Before writing novels, Jeff managed the Enid Blyton literary estate. Jeff moved to London from Los Angeles where he'd developed and produced the critically acclaimed interactive movie Choose Your Own Adventure, based on the best-selling books.

Jeff recently moved back to his homeland of Canada from London, UK where he lives with his wife, two sons, and a fluffy Bernedoodle.

Reviews

[Sarah · Rating 4 out of 5]

Now I have to start this review by saying I don't usually read middle grade fiction so this isn't the kind of book that usually ends up on my radar. However, I'm a huge fan of Jeff Norton's MetaWars series and I was lucky enough to hear him give a reading from Memoirs of a Neurotic Zombie at an event a few months back so I just had to give it a try. I'm so glad I did because it really was a fun book to read.

When Adam is killed by a bee sting on his 12th birthday you might think that was the end of the story but in fact it's only the beginning. He gives his family quite a shock when he turns up on his doorstep three months after his funeral - having just dug his way out of his grave. Adam isn't your typical zombie though, for a start he is more than a little OCD and there is nothing he hates more than dirt and germs. He doesn't even like touching other people so he's not very likely to start eating them.

Now Adam has come back from the dead he discovers that some of his friends aren't exactly what most people would consider normal either. First their is Ernesto a chupacubra who wishes he was a werewolf since they are so much cooler, then there is his neighbour Corina a vegan vampire who is constantly battling against her very traditional parents. Adam is determined to get to the bottom of his undeath and asks his friends to help him track down the zombee that killed him - after all, he doesn't want the same fate to befall anyone else.

Memoirs of a Neurotic Zombie is a brilliant book full of laugh out loud humour but also containing nice messages about family and friendship. It's a story about discovering who you are and realising that it's OK to be different. I loved the friendship that develops between Adam, Ernesto and Corina but I also loved seeing Adam come to terms with what happened to him and trying to build a new life for himself. I'm sure this book will appeal to all youngsters but even reluctant readers are bound to get a giggle out of it.

[Creative Kids Tales · Rating 4 out of 5]

To give you a true understanding of this book I have to make a confession, I’m 55yo with a 14yo daughter. A daughter, who, when I was giggling too hard to read out the passages that had me in that state, ripped the book from hands and then rapidly descended into the same state of stomach holding laughter.

Jeff Norton has written this book for ages 8 and up but it could easily keep older readers entertained through sheer humor. The neurotic zombie is Adam Meltzer, who died at his birthday party from a bee sting and returned, three months later. The reactions of the family and friends to his return is hilarious, from his astonished Mum exhorting his rolling pin wielding sister “You have a second chance to nice to your younger brother.” to the teacher who asks Adam to refund the money he spent on flowers for his funeral.

Adam, with two friends who also hide secret natures, sets out to discover the source of the killer bee and save others from being killed and zombified, while he also contends with not losing parts of himself.

As Adam is portrayed as having an exceptional IQ Jeff Norton includes a small number possibly unknown terms, words and facts within the book, the italicised, humorous and accurate explanation at the bottom of the page certainly does not detract from the book in any way and in fact I often eagerly looked for them for the extra laugh they gave me. I give Jeff top marks for an entertaining way to advance a child’s knowledge and entertain them at the same time!

This is a must for any reluctant reader (boys especially) and anyone with a great sense of humour.

Reviewed for Creative Kids Tales by Sandra Wigzell

[Michelle · Rating 4 out of 5]

When I first heard about Memoirs of a Neurotic Zombie it was at a blogger event held at Faber Headquarters. Jeff was there and read a chapter of this book, and the whole room was in stitches laughing, I knew right then that I HAD to read this book.

As you can see from the cover, and the title, Adam Meltzer is a zombie, a recently returned zombie, and his arrival back home is met with some changes. His room now belongs to his sister, her old room is now a gym, all of his precious posters, clothes, belongings, have been sent to a charity shop. Obviously Adam is feeling a bit pushed out, but he makes the most of a bad situation, which also leads to the discovery of some secret identities of his neighbours, Corina, a vegan vampire and Ernesto, a chupacubra.

When I began reading Memoirs of a Neurotic Zombie I didn't really know what to expect, and even though the back of the book introduces these two characters, I didn't really click onto the fact that they were real characters. However, ignoring my major fail in noticing the obvious, lets crack on with my review.
Memoirs of a Neurotic Zombie was an hilarious, laugh out loud read. Adam makes a strangely perfect Zombie, OCD issues and all. I love how he is constantly evaluating the germ factors of things, and adding little annotations to words and explaining them at the bottom of the page, some of his explanations were hilariously funny.

Memoirs of a Neurotic Zombie was a relatively quick read for me, but it is a perfect mixture of adventure, sleuthing, paranormal creatures, and more. I love how this recent band of friends works together so well, and occasionally comes up with some foolish ideas that somehow work. I love the addition of a little friend (with a great name) and how he helps out. The humour is easy to get for all ages, and Adam's obsession with pens for everything only adds to this whenever one is mentioned.

Jeff Norton has done it again. With a witty, hilarious read, Memoirs of a Neurotic Zombie is sure to be a hit with readers of all ages.

[Michelle (Fluttering Butterflies) · Rating 4 out of 5]

I first heard about Memoirs of A Neurotic Zombie by Jeff Norton at a blogger event earlier this year and Jeff Norton was there to read some of the beginning of this book aloud ... and it was hilarious. I found myself laughing a lot listening to this funny, awkward, neurotic pre-teen turned zombie and his adventures and I knew that I was going to love it. And I did.

Adam Meltzer has the shock of his life when a few months after he dies from a bee sting at his 12th birthday, he wakes up as a zombie. This is his story of how he both adjusts to zombie-hood but also how he solves the mystery of his own death/why he turned into a zombie. It was a whole lot of fun and is populated with some great supporting characters. I especially loved the idea that everyone is different and that those differences should be celebrated.

The thing with Adam Meltzer is that he's many things. He's obviously a pre-teen and now a zombie, but he's also a germaphobe and an absolute worrier and those things can offer their own sorts of humour. But I think the thing that I love most about Adam Meltzer is how literal he is. I know an almost 9 year old who is just as literal as Adam and I could really understand and relate to some things Adam seems to question throughout this book.

Together with Adam in this detective mission for answers are two friends Ernesto and Corina who are in the unique position to understand Adam's predicament in that they are a chupacabra and a vampire respectively. What I really loved about this trio is the level of support and friendship they give to each other.

Altogether, Memoirs of a Neurotic Zombie was a really fun, funny book about a group of outsiders who find a place to belong and who go on this dangerous adventure seeking truth in this really entertaining way and I was gripped throughout by what they get up to. I loved reading a book that was so humorous as well as being full of heart. Highly recommended!

[Anna (booksandbookends) · Rating 5 out of 5]

I received an eBook copy of 'Memoirs of a Neurotic Zombie' from the publishers via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

What would you do if you woke up and found yourself in a grave? Not sure? Me neither. But this is just the dilemma which Adam faces. After returning back home after crawling out of a coffin, he finds out he has supposedly been dead for three months. His life, or rather afterlife, is completely turned upside down when he finds out his friends aren't all he suspected them to be either. From being a seemingly invisible middle school student, Adam becomes popular and as a zombie, this might not be the best idea. Ending up at the most unlikely of places and with the constant fear of contamination and germs, Adam faces the challenge of a lifetime. The quest he leads to find the "killer" bee which killed him leads to unexpected discoveries and a whole new adventure. Will Adam be able to locate the killer bee and still be germ free? You'll just have to read to find out.

After reading the blurb of this book I was really eager to read it! I'm not really all that sure what I expected, but this book far exceeded my expectations. With hilarious characters and brilliant jokes (for adults as well as children)! This is a lovely children's book which would be greatly appealing for young boys who just love to read about zombies and poo. It's really a laugh out loud kind of book which will have you in hysterics. The characters just make this book brilliant, the protagonist Adam with his OCD about germs makes his everyday woes hilarious. Their antics in the book made this greatly entertaining and this book is sure to be a hit with children.

A lovely children's book which might make you lose an arm or two laughing! A lovely book to share with children.

[Elaine - Splashes Into Books · Rating 5 out of 5]

Imagine the last thing you remember is being stung by a bee . . . then when you wake up and manage to get yourself home you find out you are a zombie and your funeral was three months ago! That's the start of this hilarious, adventure as the totally OCD star of the book shares his memories of what happened after he found out he was a zombie, returned home, made new friends and had a fantastic adventure - including meeting a zombee!! A great story, brilliantly told which will have you smiling and laughing all the way through! Oh, and just in case you don't understand some of the terms used, there are explanations throughout the text!

Highly recommend this book to anyone who needs laughter in their life and enjoys a good read - another children's book that the young at heart will also thoroughly enjoy :)

[Daphne (Illumicrate) · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 stars. Very funny but got a little bit strange towards the end and just a little bit too much about poo. Loved Adam and his neurosis, the footnotes and 'you meddling kids'! Sets up nicely for what I think will be a very popular kids series. Full review to come

[Wyoming · Rating 4 out of 5]

Genuinely amazing comedy, like I've never read a novel executing punchlines this consistently. Some of it is juvenile stuff which isn't funny at all but all the character interactions are fantastic. Particularly between Corina and Adam. The language is so basic, being a book aimed at young tweens, that it reads like a movie script- Which is great! It's kinda just really punchy, well-executed fun. Exactly what it's trying to be. Gift it to your kids.

[Alexandra · Rating 5 out of 5]

I absolutely loved this book! I had the pleasure of meeting Jeff Norton when he arrived in Cirencester on the train from London dressed as a Zombie! So privileged to meet this wonderful author! Check out my book review on https://youtu.be/CPUOnrUDxWo

[Rohan · Rating 4 out of 5]

This made me laugh. It's a sweet zombie book with magic and science co existing btw. Positively ghoulish and made me chuckle.

[Hazel · Rating 3 out of 5]

This ARC was provided by the publisher via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review

One day in Ohio Adam Meltzer is celebrating his twelfth birthday when suddenly he dies from a fatal be sting. Then he comes back to life – sort of. Jeff Norton’s children’s book Memoirs of a Neurotic Zombie is a comical tale narrated by Adam who is, as the title suggests, a zombie.

Three months after his death Adam claws his way out of his coffin and heads home where he attempts to carry on with life (afterlife?) even though his sister has taken over his bedroom and all his clothes have been donated to charity. Oh, and his body had already started decomposing. However it is not long until he discovers that he is not the only unnatural being in his neighbourhood. Connected by their weirdness, Adam becomes firm friends with Corina (a half-vampire) and Ernesto (a chupacabra). Inspired by a school science project (being half-dead is no reason for exemption, apparently) the three of them set out to track down the bee that killed Adam and solve the mystery concerning his return from the grave.

Memoirs of Neurotic Zombie is full of humour targeted at nine to twelve year olds, so reviewing this from an adult’s perspective if rather difficult. As people get older child humour becomes less funny, particularly in relation to certain bodily functions – namely poo. Even though being a children’s book limits the amount of seriousness, some of the story line did not feel quite right. Adam’s parents and sister were far too accepting of the situation and the lies he told at school to explain what had happened were rather farfetched.

An important element to the story was that Adam was suffering from OCD and as a result was gripped by a fear of dirt, bacteria and disease – rather ironic considering his physical condition. There is nothing wrong with writing for children about characters with disorders such as OCD, however there was no explanation about the seriousness of this mental illness. Adam’s behaviour was used to make him appear less “normal” than other children his age – something campaigners are encouraging people not to think!

There were some deliberate inaccuracies in Adam’s narrative, which added to the hilarity, although how much the reader will benefit from these will depend on their own intelligence. On the other hand there were one or two errors that may not have been intentional. “I lurched forward like a tweenage Frankenstein” – surely that should be “Frankenstein’s monster”? Unless, of course, Norton intended Adam not to be aware that Frankenstein was the scientist?

The storyline overall is enjoyable and something children, particularly boys, would enjoy. Then again it may not be suitable for the more sensitive child as it deals with themes of death and paranormal creatures. Adam comes across as rather intelligent for his age – despite taking some things too literally – so there are footnotes to explain definitions of difficult words or to clarify something further. In spite of a few misgivings I would recommend this book to its intended target audience.

[Jenni · Rating 5 out of 5]

Sometimes I look at my bookcase when I’m trying to choose my next read and find myself yearning for something that’s completely fun. On these occasions I always start looking over the Middle Grade titles I have waiting for me, this is almost always where the funniest books on my shelves can be found. Everything I’d heard about Memoirs of a Neurotic Zombie made me think it was going to serve my desire for a fun read very well indeed.

Adam is a really engaging lead character, he’s funny and self-deprecating without either feeling over done. I found his frustrations with returning to his life to find out how much of it has already changed both touching and amusing, the way Adam just got on with things worked really well. I also enjoyed the introduction of his two fellow non-humans; Corina the vegan vampire and Ernesto the chupacubra. All three have their own issues with their supernatural side, I felt this made their burgeoning friendship all the stronger. I very much liked that the chupacubra was included – it’s nice to see some of the lesser used supernatural species get a little attention from time to time.

There is a great quest aspect to this book, Adam doesn’t understand why he is a zombie and decides to find the bee that stung and killed him. I learnt something from this element of the plot – I’d always been under the impression once bees stung they died, a quick search taught me this only holds true for honey bees. Once I’d educated myself I got straight back to reading, willing the trio on as they tried to track down the responsible creature. The way this all plays out is very satisfying, I really enjoyed that whilst the quest is for the answers Adam’s looking for both Corina and Ernesto also get to develop a lot throughout its progression.

The book contains lots of footnotes, something I have very mixed feelings about. I’ve read books where they’ve been really badly done and had a hugely detrimental effect on how I’ve felt about the book. When they’re done well though they can add a lot to the reading experience and the footnotes in Memoirs of a Neurotic Zombie are done really well. They added a lot to Adam’s character and often made me laugh.

This is the first of Jeff Norton’s books that I’ve read, despite being very aware of his hugely popular Metawars series I’ve never picked one up to read. This was a great introduction to his writing and I now have every intention of catching up. In the meantime I’m going to be purchasing a few copies of Memoirs of a Neurotic Zombie as gifts over the next few months – I have some young readers in mind who I know will love this as much as I did!

[Felicity Terry · Rating 4 out of 5]

Though far from the middle grade reader (generally considered as those aged between 9 and 11) for which this book is marketed I have to admit that I did find myself laughing out loud several times.

After all with a newly 'born' tweenage zombie (zom-boy) who has a thing about hygiene, a vegan half-vampire (both proof that the whole undead thing hasn't been, well, done to death?) and, my favourite, a chupacabra who wishes he was a werewolf what is there not to laugh at?

Definitely one I'd recommend for boys. With its toilet humour (on occasion quite literal toilet humour) and at times extremely funny but kind of gross humour its sure to appeal in a way that it perhaps didn't always for me.

What I did really enjoy about the book though was Adam's trying to fit back into school after his three months absence and the exploration of our three superheroes coming to the terms with their difference in a world where 'difference scares people. It's threatening. It's un-American.'

Copyright: Tracy Terry @ Pen and Paper.

[gem · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was absolutely fab, it's got a wonderfully quirky cast of characters who get into an inordinate amount of mischief in a short amount of time, and through it all they form a bond which seems to cement them as best friends and bodes well for future adventures. I laughed out loud *alot* (not so good on the bus, I got some very odd looks!) because Adam in particular was such a great character. I think this would be a perfect book for anyone who likes Skulduggery Pleasant (or Buffy, if you're old like me!), Jonathan Stroud or Artemis Fowl. I can't wait to read book 2.

[Emma Christina · Rating 3 out of 5]

A humorous light reading, however, I wouldn't strive to read any sequels but it was a nice light read.

[Dmitri Parker · Rating 4 out of 5]

Fun book.
Funny too.