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Begin to Exit Here
Kurt Clausen has worked as a salad girl, a porn salesman, and - prehaps most reluctantly - a journalist. In this "terminally irreverent" ( "Richmond News-Leader" ) novel, he finds himself taking on everyone from his editor and his girlfriend to the fundamentalists and vegetarians covered on his beat - and along the way, learns some surprising (and hilarious) lessons about life, love, and the press.
• Welter's "I Want to Buy a Vowel," also a Berkley Signature Edition, was named one of "Booklist's" Best Books of 1996.
• Great reviews in the Berkley Signature Edition tradition.
• The author has been compared to everyone from John Irving to Jonathan Swift, Frank Capra to Carl Hiaasen, John Kennedy Toole to Dave Barry.
• Welter's "I Want to Buy a Vowel," also a Berkley Signature Edition, was named one of "Booklist's" Best Books of 1996.
• Great reviews in the Berkley Signature Edition tradition.
• The author has been compared to everyone from John Irving to Jonathan Swift, Frank Capra to Carl Hiaasen, John Kennedy Toole to Dave Barry.
246 pages, Mass Market Paperback
First published April 30, 1992
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Displaying 1 - 16 of 16 reviews
July 28, 2017
Begin to Exit Here by Joh n Welter takes the reader through a cynical college English major's journey from unemployed to reluctant reporter on a mid-west newspaper. His editor allows him to write in the style that he wants-not straight who, what, who, where, why, and how. His stories provide views that appear odd to the editor and readers as he makes points that he thinks elucidate the story subjects. His girlfriend assuages his fears and laughs at about every thing he discusses, until he takes on her girlfriend. Hitting subjects such as vegetarianism, fundamentalism, and research funding, this book gives a darkly-humorous view of the world.
August 11, 2012
Intensely irreverent, which gets the main protagonist Kurt Clausen, into mounds of trouble. He's too witty for his own good and his profession, journalism. For most of the book it depressed me because he gains a wonderful girlfriend, which I don't. That aside, a great look at journalism in the early 1990s, before the internet decimated newspapers. No Catch-22s, but very Joseph Hellerian humor, liller's book 'Something Happened'. All who have worked in corporations where their main goal is to drumb all individuality out of their employees, can relate.
June 1, 2022
{4⭐️} It is a crime this book doesn’t have an uploaded cover (or at least it doesn’t show for me). The cover is literally—and I understand the irony—the reason I bought it. I don’t think it’s the mass market cover but it’s beautiful.
Anyways, if you like the absurdities of Catch 22 and how it pokes fun at war, Begin to Exit Here is fundamentally the same, but its targets are journalism and religion. And this man pulls NO punches. Kurt and Janice are beautiful and hilarious; it’s comforting to have characters that absolutely refuse to take themselves seriously.
Favorite Quote(s):
“When people die, that’s frequently what they become [bones]. But do you know what you’re more apt to find than bones? Trash. The one thing that all ancient and modern cultures produced with universal proficiency was trash.”
“‘Are you going to call the Institute of State and ask if someone could be found criminally negligent for letting Earth exist?’
‘Yes. Someone should be in jail.’”
“Sometimes a newspaper story was like a handful of rocks thrown with your eyes closed. You were likely to hit someone, but you didn’t know who until they screamed.”
“It was the largest unwanted triumph of my career in newspapers when my story came out and I was accused of irreverence for quoting scripture. The people least capable of understanding irony were the ones creating all of it.”
“…like God got a handful of stars and threw them, and they stayed there always, scattered for our wonderment. Which made for good poetry, until scientist told us the stars are made of hydrogen. No one wrote poems about hydrogen. The century was changing things. When lovers looked up at the burning hydrogen at night, it wasn’t as romantic.”
Anyways, if you like the absurdities of Catch 22 and how it pokes fun at war, Begin to Exit Here is fundamentally the same, but its targets are journalism and religion. And this man pulls NO punches. Kurt and Janice are beautiful and hilarious; it’s comforting to have characters that absolutely refuse to take themselves seriously.
Favorite Quote(s):
“When people die, that’s frequently what they become [bones]. But do you know what you’re more apt to find than bones? Trash. The one thing that all ancient and modern cultures produced with universal proficiency was trash.”
“‘Are you going to call the Institute of State and ask if someone could be found criminally negligent for letting Earth exist?’
‘Yes. Someone should be in jail.’”
“Sometimes a newspaper story was like a handful of rocks thrown with your eyes closed. You were likely to hit someone, but you didn’t know who until they screamed.”
“It was the largest unwanted triumph of my career in newspapers when my story came out and I was accused of irreverence for quoting scripture. The people least capable of understanding irony were the ones creating all of it.”
“…like God got a handful of stars and threw them, and they stayed there always, scattered for our wonderment. Which made for good poetry, until scientist told us the stars are made of hydrogen. No one wrote poems about hydrogen. The century was changing things. When lovers looked up at the burning hydrogen at night, it wasn’t as romantic.”
July 11, 2025
This was an odd one - no real plot as it's just an alcoholic journalist fired, finds a girlfriend, gets and loses another job and pretty much goes through life with a level of anxiety and cynicism that makes for mild humor but mostly cringe-worthy events. The whole story covers maybe 2 - 3 months and while there's some interesting writing, the lack of propulsion of much of anything makes it tough to say it was "good".
January 31, 2023
A very good and entertaining comedy. Though there was no serious plot, it showed strong and controversial opinions even in today society but delivered in a blunt an ironic way that makes you laugh. John Welter did a strong job with this short fictional novel.
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November 28, 2007A love story for men perhaps... at least for those of us that are still boys at heart. The protagonist is yet another that I relate to a little too well. The attitude to work, life and love are dealt with a goofy sincerity... and the happily ever after isn't without it's hurdles. Another of my go back to again, quick reads that I enjoy again and again!
July 15, 2012
Quick and sometimes witty, sometimes obnoxious read. Very snarky attitude from the main character, which I enjoyed most at the beginning of the book and then it went into a downward spiral. Three stars for the uniqueness, but no more than three stars either.
July 14, 2021
This was much better when I was 16. The jokes have a certain Marx Brothers zaniness to them that’s hit or miss (mostly a miss). Not crazy about the fact that the girlfriend is mostly there to soothe the man’s ego and doesn’t have much of a purpose narratively other than that.
December 28, 2022
10/4/2019 just reread this one and am amazed by the society's progress on several social issues over such a short time (20 years). This book serves as a time capsule of the late 20th century.
I read this one after college and remember loving it.
I read this one after college and remember loving it.
July 17, 2007
I know I read it in 1998 because it's written in one of my old journals. I even wrote that I liked it. Naturally I don't remember a thing about the contents of this novel.
June 24, 2008
After reading "Night of the Avenging Blowfish" I had to look up the rest of the author's work. I didn't love this one quite as much, but it is a still a clever, fun read.
July 19, 2008
One of my newspaper colleagues introduced me to this book in the early 1990s. Everytime I want to take my job too seriously, I make myself reread it.
June 12, 2010
Every journalist or disillusioned former journalist should read this one, just for a knowing laugh.
January 29, 2017
I remember reading this like years ago. Not really my cup of tea but the main character was funny. I don't remember the story line but I remember me selling the book on ebay after finish reading it
May 14, 2013
I don't remember anything about this book other than me laughing the entire way through.
Displaying 1 - 16 of 16 reviews