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Johnnies #4

Black John

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John Carey is just out of rehab and dying inside when he gets word that Tory, the guy who loved him and broke him, has removed himself from the world in the most bitter way possible—and left John to clean up his mess.

Forced back to his hometown in Florida, John's craving a hit with every memory when he meets Tory's neighbor. Spacey and judgmental, Galen Henderson has been rotting in his crappy apartment since a motorcycle accident robbed him of his mobility, his looks, and his boyfriend all in one mistake. Galen's been hiding at the bottom of an oxy bottle, but when John shows up, he feels obligated to help wade through the wreckage of Tory's life.

The last thing John needs is another relationship with an addict, and the last thing Galen wants is a conscience. Both of them are shocked when they find that their battered souls can learn from and heal one another. It doesn't hurt that they're both getting a crash course on how growing up and getting past your worst mistakes sure beats the alternative—and that true love is something to fight to keep if your lover is fighting to love you back.

280 pages, Paperback

First published January 26, 2015

35 people are currently reading
681 people want to read

About the author

Amy Lane

203 books3,487 followers
Amy Lane dodges an EDJ, mothers four children, and writes the occasional book. She, her brood, and her beloved mate, Mack, live in a crumbling mortgage in Citrus Heights, California, which is riddled with spiders, cats, and more than its share of fancy and weirdness. Feel free to visit her at www.greenshill.com orwww.writerslane.blogspot.com, where she will ride the buzz of receiving your e-mail until her head swells and she can no longer leave the house.

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Displaying 1 - 30 of 194 reviews
Profile Image for Heather K (dentist in my spare time).
4,108 reviews6,669 followers
January 26, 2015
*3.5 stars*

Drug addictions, pornography, family drama, abandonment issues... yup, you guessed it! It's the latest installment in Amy Lane's "Johnnies" series!

I will always have a soft spot for this series. Dex in Blue was one of my first M/Ms, and so these books are like my M/M homecoming. They are ANGSTY and weighty but I like being put through the ringer sometimes.

I think fans of the other Johnnies books will really love this one. It rectifies some of the mistakes that Ethan in Gold made, IMO. I liked that this book really put the focus on the relationship with John and Galen. They were clearly the MCs, and though there were other characters in the mix, I felt like the other story lines weren't interfering. I also liked the whole back story with John and Tory. It created a lot of compassion for John, who came across as sort of a dick in the earlier books.

However, this book still wasn't perfect for me. I think Amy Lane has a tendency to have her characters get really serious really quickly. Like, one minute they are meeting or just friends, and the next they are saying that they could never be apart. Sometimes that works for me spectacularly, sometimes it doesn't. Here, I never quite bought the speed of Galen and John's relationship. With no back story and prior meetings between the two of them, I just wasn't seeing how they got so intense so fast. Especially with the drug addictions in the mix, it just didn't feel quite real to me.

I also thought that the heat level was a bit lower with this one. Though there are some hot moments, I wasn't feeling that DYING to be together level of sexual tension. And I love me some tension. I think compared to some of the other Johnnies books, this book was less erotic.

Though not a home run, this was another expertly written, really well thought out book in a series that is near and dear to my heart.

**Copy provided by the publisher in exchange for an honest review**

Profile Image for Kaje Harper.
Author 91 books2,727 followers
February 3, 2015
This is the fourth book in a favorite series for me. I do recommend reading in order - book 1, Chase in Shadow, is a very favorite read for me.

John ended the previous (somewhat overlapping time frame) three books as a bad guy, a man who sold out his best friend to a drug-dealing ex in order to pay for his addiction. But in this book, John's pain and his backstory are there to move him slowly from bad guy to "it's complicated" to a sympathetic figure, a man who deserves another chance. There is a lot of painful story here.

As the book opens, John is fresh out of rehab. I appreciated that his recovery wasn't shown as easy or certain. He continues to fight falling back into addiction throughout the book. Many of his issues can be laid at the feet of his first boyfriend, Tory. From the early days, Tory was his best friend and lover, but there was a deep hole of neediness in Tory that John couldn't fill. Tory turned to drugs, and eventually John couldn't stand to watch that, and wasn't strong enough to stop him. And now Tory is dead.

Tory's neighbor in his last days was Galen, once a lawyer, now a scarred and pain-pill addicted shadow of himself. But even that badly impaired, Galen is smart and compassionate and the right guy to be around as John tries to deal with being Tory's next of kin. Their relationship is fragile, made from loss and need more than a real connection at first, but it grows. Amy Lane is very good at these stories of damaged characters, oozing their heart's blood silently, fighting and losing the good fight until they find the man to stand with them.

It's a challenge to depict an addict both realistically and as a romantic MC. This book succeeds. The end is a little abrupt. It's definitely a HFN, full of hope, but bringing together two people who haven't spent much both-of-us-sober time learning to live with each other yet. Their past addictions loom over their future happiness. But there's a hint in this book of a sequel, with a possible future couple, so I'm hoping this isn't the last I'll get to see of John and Galen.

ETA: Amy Lane has given us a little free additional epilogue - just another moment with the guys that moves them closer to their happy ending - http://lovebytesreviews.com/2015/02/0...
Profile Image for Eva.
363 reviews178 followers
February 23, 2015
Great final chapter of wonderful series



BLACK JOHN




I like my John better than one on the cover. His story was amazing... Review to come.

BR here
Profile Image for ☆ Todd.
1,441 reviews1,584 followers
December 26, 2015
I'm kinda, sorta addicted to Amy Lane's books. Yes, there I said it.



I'd read and loved the first three books of the "Johnnies" series and was really excited to see that the fourth book was coming out, so I jumped on this advanced copy like a cat on a rat.



Or something like that. : )

The first three books were full of all types of action and adventure and, for the most part, there was never a dull moment. Conflict, tons of sexy adventures and angst galore, hot and steaming off the grill.

So as I began reading this new story of John, the founder and owner of Johnnies, the porn studio around which all of the previous books centered, I quickly saw that 'one of these things is not like the other.'



While the previous books gave you a front row seat to the 15 car pileup on the I-80 headed into Sacramento, complete with all of the hot, sticky, salty buttered popcorn and Twizzlers you could stomach...



... this book felt a bit more like watching all of that action after the fact, from your living room on the 10 o'clock news. So mainly it's the news anchor providing eyewitness reports and we get to watch the cleanup.

The story begins with John in rehab for a cocaine addiction which almost cost him both his business and his best friend and co-worker, (the always amazing) Dex. John survives rehab only to be informed that the estranged love of his life, Tory, has committed suicide back in Florida and he travels there to begin sifting through the ashes of the ruins that were Tory's life.



Upon arrival, John meets Tory's friend and neighbor, Galen, a man who has lost everything in the aftermath of a disfiguring motorcycle crash and only lives for his next pain-relieving, life-numbing fix of OxyContin.



John's attraction is immediate, but he is reluctant to give Galen a shot because he's fresh out of rehab and the last thing that a recovering junkie needs in his life is a non-recovering one.



But the more time that they spend together, the stronger the pull until they feel toward one another and eventually find themselves in a tentative relationship.

The main concentration of the story is John overcoming his unrequited feelings for Tory and succumbing to his new, very requited feelings for Galen.

Plus Galen is dealing with his own recovery from both addiction and physical limitations due to the accident, coupled with the strong need that he feels to become someone worthy of John, someone who will never make him feel as if John is anything other than a *first* choice.



It was a good story and, in my opinion, the angst was kept to a manageable level and the conflicts came from within versus without, as in the previous books.

And we get our happily ever after, with the last part of the book also supplying a bonus of the follow up on Dex & Kane adopting Kane's niece, then Chase & Tommy's baby boy being born. (I loved that part of the book.)

"Black John" does not supply quite the (*hawt & porn'y*) thrill ride in the previous books, but is a definite must read once you've read the Chase, Dex and Ethan books.

Also, this one is *not* a standalone read, as a lot would be lost without the backstory.

3.5 stars.

----------------------------------

** My ARC copy of the book was provided by the publisher for a fair, unbiased review.
Profile Image for Vanessa North.
Author 42 books522 followers
February 1, 2015
I can't really give a full review of this book without spoilers, so you know, not gonna do that. :) but i will say i recommend for fans of Amy's Johnnies series, those who enjoyed her serial last year, etc. Amy has a unique, lyrical voice so different from many in our genre, and if you are, like me, a fan of her voice and her other work, you will likely enjoy this as much as I did.

I don't recommend reading this as a standalone--i feel it works best knowing the backgrounds of the supporting cast, most especially Dex and Kane from Dex in Blue. I do actually think this could be read without reading Chase or Ethan, but needs Dex for context and full backstory.
Profile Image for Adam.
611 reviews374 followers
February 13, 2015
I'd been looking forward to John's story ever since his meltdown in Dex in Blue. It was every bit the angst-fest-with-a-happy-ending that makes the Johnnies books one of my favourite series!

Just out of rehab, John has to return to his old hometown to deal with the death of his first love, Tory. Tory and John had grown up together, made porn together and were even kicked out of their homes together. Unable to handle his family's rejection, Tory turned to drugs and sex. His addiction eventually forced John to leave, but John didn't do so happily. In Florida, John meets Galen, Tory's neighbour and a former corporate lawyer who's been reduced to living in pill-popping squalor after a horrific bike crash.

'Black John' is quite different from previous books in the series. The other books focus heavily on the porn, which drives a lot of the angst, primarily through using porn as a way to deal with other issues. In this book, John owns a porn studio, but he isn't a porn actor himself and spends most of the book out of the studio. While I was a bit skeptical at first, this change in format didn't detract from the story at all.

There's also a lot of focus on addiction. John is a recovering addict, Tory was a life-long addict, and Galen has developed a dependency to deal with his physical pain. Needless to say, it gets pretty morbid. Reading about John's struggle to stay on the wagon while dealing with his past and his attraction to Galen was heartbreaking. Throw in Galen's struggle with pain pills, and his disgust over what he's become, and I was definitely in Amy-Lane-Angst City. And I enjoyed the hell out of it!

The romance here comes in stages. You would think that it shouldn't work, given that John is a pornographer and a recovering addict, and Galen is a former corporate lawyer and current addict. The two come from completely different worlds, but it's their connection to Tory that draws the two together. While cleaning up after Tory, the two realize that the other might be the answer to whatever's broken inside them. It takes a while for them to get to the stage where they can admit that they need each other, but it's a damned good journey.

Overall, 'Black John' was a great book. There's angst and healing, but there's also a great romance. Bonus points for catching up with the MCs from the previous books!
Profile Image for Papie.
875 reviews186 followers
December 23, 2023
This one hurt. My heart broke for John and I wanted to wrap him in a warm blanket and hold him. His parents, Tory’s inability to love him, the porn, the drugs, his inability to love himself.

I loved Galen and was so happy they found each other.

But my heart broke for Tory too, and to see him end like that, with nobody really caring for him in the end just gutted me. Yeah, I guess we were not supposed to love him. But my heart hurt so much for him. I hated his family so much. How can you be a warm loving mother, cooking and taking care of your children, and then write one off as if he never existed? That love is supposed to be unconditional. You can’t take it away. Ever. The funeral scene was so sad.

I think the fact that I lost my brother to suicide and recently lost a good friend to an overdose made this harder. I wanted forgiveness for Tory.
Anyways. Read this. It will hurt so good.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
Profile Image for Jyanx.
Author 3 books109 followers
October 14, 2015
I'm having a hard time reviewing this because the drug problem where I live is pretty serious.

No, I'm not kidding.

Yes, Maine is beautiful.

We still have drugs.

Lots of drugs.

I don't think I know anyone who hasn't been involved with or affected by someone with a serious drug problem. My younger sister has a friend. They have been friends since they were kids. Her friend lost her sister in her early 20's to a drug overdose. I babysat for both girls when they were little. It was awful.

So I appreciated the honesty with which the author dealt with John and Galen's drug problems. I liked seeing them grow together, and learn to deal with their issues, and face their past. I liked it wasn't about one man saving the other, but about them learning to support each other, and to, in a sense, save themselves.

Tory's story makes it hard to rate as well. Let's just say suicide is a significant issue where I live as well.

I'll just close by saying that I appreciate the honesty of this story, and I like the respect the author has for her characters, the work they do, and the situations that they are in.

Also I still like John better than Kane.

So much better.

description


Profile Image for Jewel.
1,935 reviews280 followers
February 14, 2018
Black John is about forgiveness and atonement. Forgiving yourself for being far less than you wanted to be​, for making the most monumental mistakes​, and​ forgiving yourself and others for not being stronger. It's also about atoning for the wrongs committed against those you love and who love you. It's about finally figuring out that you deserve love.

John Carey has been running Johnnies for well over a decade. He built the business originally with his boyfriend Tory, but Tory was broken and couldn't find his way back from his rock-bottom. Still, John never forgave himself for leaving, even though he knew it was the only real choice. And now, fresh out of rehab, John not only has his own demons to fight, he has to face his past and do one last thing for Tory -- clean up Tory's last mess.

Galen​ Henderson​ was Tory's neighbor. He used to be a hot-shot corporate lawyer with money and a future, until an accident took it all away. Three years later, he still hasn't recovered and is now nursing an addiction to Oxy​, along with his injuries​. He's scarred on the outside and scarred on the inside, and he has a hard time even caring. And then, he meets John.

​This story kind of wrecked me, in true Amy Lane fashion. It's a story about friendship and family and healing and love. It's not an easy read, for sure. It deals heavily with addiction. John and Galen's relationship is in focus, though, and that made me all kinds of happy. Galen helps John sort through Tory's life and they bond over grief and loss and overcoming addiction.

The tone was more subdued than the other books, and the steam a bit lower, but I loved it. John and Galen both deserve their HEA and I was invested in them through to the end.

Recommended.
Profile Image for Debra ~~ seriously slacking on her reviews ~~.
2,232 reviews260 followers
November 7, 2015
3.5 stars

While this book definitely redeemed John and had me forgiving him for his behavior in Dex in Blue, I found myself struggling with the relationship part of the story. I liked both John and Galen, and understood the fast friendship born out of shared circumstances, but it took me a long time to get invested in them as a couple. I did want them together and happy by the end of the story, and I was completely on board with the way things played out, I just felt like I was missing something.

I don't want to sound like I didn't like the story, because I did. The book was well written and Tory and John's story was incredibly sad and heartbreaking. I liked seeing John reconnecting with his friends and coming to an understanding of himself. Galen was also a great character and I would love to see more of him in any future books.

I am wondering if my love of the first two books has just set the bar too high and is coloring my view of the past two books (although I think Bobby and Reg would make an interesting pair). Overall it was a good and necessary story in the Johnnies series, but I'm looking forward to the next book (if there is one) staying back in California, at the studio and with the guys as they move onto the next phase of their stories.



--------------
Thanks Jennifer for the heads up on the bonus epilogue.
http://lovebytesreviews.com/2015/02/0...
Profile Image for Alvin.
394 reviews104 followers
May 26, 2015
Okay, I want to like to this. But unfortunately, I can't.

It was not easy for me to understand John or Galen. And I was not easily convinced in their romance. It took me more than halfway through the story for me to like them.

The story, oh gosh, a lot of it was John's memory of Tory, his first love. Which I ended up not really caring of.

The timeline. This was set at the same time setting as the previous books, which irritated me. Do four people in the same circle find love all at the same time? And I haven't reread the other books so I had some difficulty remembering the events then.

Dex was featured a lot in the story because of John's feelings for him so be sure to remember the events from Dex in Blue.

Unrequited love and drugs are not fun to read. I blame that as the reason for me not to enjoy this book so much. But I'm not saying this book is bad. I just can't make myself to like it.

2.5 STARS.


BTW, I found an adorable BONUS CHAPTER for Black John. It was lovely! Here:
http://lovebytesreviews.com/2015/02/0...

Enjoy!
Profile Image for Ele.
1,319 reviews40 followers
February 7, 2015
4.5 stars

First of all, if addiction and situations related to it are a trigger for you, i think you 'd better not read this.

This is the story of John, owner of Johnnies-drug addict- douchebag , and Galen ,drug addict as well.I won't say how they met because i don't want to spoil things.

There wasn't much steam and sex in this book and that was ok with me.The two MCs are two people damaged who manage to save each other and become better men.

“You… you’d spent your whole life being second, thinking that was okay. I wanted to be the best so you’d know that’s what I thought of you too.”

The most heartbreaking thing for me was the whole backstory with Tory, John's ex boyfriend, who was,in a way, always present in the story.Oh man...this story explains so much about how John became this way and what he and Tory went through

They came out too soon, and the world was too painful. They ripped out of the tight wrappings of youth, not fed enough on love, not fed enough on security, to want to stay children anymore. They’d been so sure that the world, the adventurous bright world, would be far more accommodating, but it hadn’t been. It had been brutal, and Tory had spent the next seventeen years trying to get back.

The only thing that seemed a bit off,was how fast Galen and John fell for each other.That seemed kind of rushed.

Best scenes, John's ass selfie and the gathering of all the Johnnies towards the end.
After all, i did like John.He came out a different person,stronger, sensitive and human.In Galen's words Kitten. On the. Freeway.
Profile Image for Cadiva.
3,992 reviews435 followers
February 19, 2018
Well Amy Lane you just broke me with this one.

John has been there in all the other stories, founder of Johnnies and last seen heading into rehab after making one of his most stupid decisions when he agreed to the demands of Dex's ex Scott to schedule a scene with the pair of them, knowing Dex was now in love with Kane and not doing porn any more, because he owed Scott a massive amount for supplying him with coke.

As a character there in the background, we've not really seen much of what happened to John before these books started, so he's always come across as a bit of an idiot and a slightly self-entitled arse.

Well here we find out why and oh my God does it go all the way into explaining why he set up Johnnies and why he'd tried to be a fair and good boss, letting the guys do what made them happy while never taking care of himself and ending up nearly losing it all through his cocaine addiction.

It's difficult to go into too much detail without spoiling it but this story takes place after the events of the previous three as John goes to deal with the fall out of the death of his first love Tory, the man who utterly broke him.

He meets Galen as he was Tory's neighbour and he's holding a box left for John by his ex lover. Galen used to be a corporate lawyer with a long term boyfriend and porn star looks until a motorbike accident lost him all three and left him addicted to pain meds.

Together these two addicted and damaged men start to find in the other the one constant they can rely on for support so they won't ever need to take the drugs again.

It's a hard fight though and Lane never shies away from the constant craving addicts face or the desire to give in to the temptation of addiction.

These are damaged and hurting men but the build up to them falling for each other is magnificently done even if it takes place over a short space of time.
Galen sees in John someone who looks past his scaring and sees the man beneath, the one who is struggling not to be an addict but who has nothing to keep him from the oxy bottle.

John doesn't want to fall for another addict but it's the first time a man has looked at him with the passion he sees and the desire to put him before anyone else. This is harsh, it's brutal but it's breathtakingly honest and when they do finally give in, it's spectacular.

There's also a free extra chapter which is a bit of an epilogue here: http://lovebytesreviews.com/2015/02/0...
Profile Image for Carol.
3,757 reviews137 followers
March 20, 2022
I didn't care much for John in the first 3 books...he seemed the weak link...so I went into this one, John's story, with a lot of caution. By now I am well aware of what to expect from the series and the guys that make up John and Dex's business. John is co/owner of the porn film company. He gave Dex a percentage of it before he went into rehab in the last book. He's out now and still fragile but he's trying hard for his business partner, Dex and the other men that depend on the business to be a sucess to pay their bills and feed their families, so I'm, at this point giving John a chance. Still he's done some pretty awful things from the time he was a kid and more recently...to Dex. All the men in this series have some serious baggage in their background which makes them a broken mess and John is no exception. But on his trip to Florida to take care of the ashes of his best friend and first lover from his childhood from Hell, Troy...he finds another broken soul, Galen, that just may be willing to redeem himself for a future with John. The story moves back in forth in time so that the reader gets a full feel for what happened between John and Tory. It's a powerful story that is sometimes difficult to read and I believe even harder to understand if the reader has no experience with what John and Troy went through growing up. I can see where the "profession" of the Johnnie models has to be tough, but I hope that somewhere out there, there may be a real company like Johnnies who cares for its guys, and not just the money they make for it. I am famous for reading out of order, so I've missed the first book in the series Chase in Shadows but have found it in a set...so I have the first book and the last book yet to go...but I believe this one was the hardest to read and understand. It's not for the weak of heart.
Profile Image for Aerin.
594 reviews1 follower
January 25, 2015
4.5 Stars

Every time I start a new Amy Lane book, I prepare myself to have my heart ripped out, because nobody writes angst like Amy does. I swear I can still FEEL her books a year later. Black John is book 4 in the Johnnies series, and while all the books are wonderful and you shouldn’t miss out on them, this could definitely be read as a standalone. I am happy to say this wasn’t quite as dark as the previous books. I mean there was definitely plenty of angst, but I’m proud to say I only managed to shed tears ONCE *go me!!!*

This is the story of John, the founder of Johnnies, a friend and a wonderful employer, until he became a coke addict. John has been struggling for a long time and things finally come crashing down. But before he can put himself back together and be the friend and the boss he needs to be, he has to survive rehab and overcome and make peace with his ex-boyfriend/best friend’s (Tory) death.

There was plenty of heartbreak in the relationship between John and Tory, and I got to understand where John’s self-deprecation and low self-esteem is coming from. His relationship with Tory was all kinds of dysfunctional and I definitely didn’t have any pity or sympathy for Tory. What I loved the most about John’s journey, both present and past, is that we find out exactly why John got into the business of filming porn and how Johnnies (and all the previous companies) were created. For Tory, it was the desperate search for “love” and adoration he could get from multiple sex partners and from the public who would eventually watch his videos. John on the other hand, wanted to show the world how beautiful and fun sex could be, and how lovely it is to see two human beings being intimate while making each other feel good. Tory and John couldn’t have been more different, and I hated that John felt guilty for Tory’s constant fuck-ups, but in the end he got to meet Galen, and I can say it was all worth it.

Galen was a hot mess; he’s an addict, hooked up on Ox and other prescription pain killers. I’m used to Amy’s characters being damaged, but I thought Galen was the worst of all. When John and Galen got together I felt like I was witnessing one of those instant friendships, where the people felt like they knew each other forever, even though they were practically strangers. So what’s wrong with that you say? I honestly thought they were going to be crap in bed, because at first I couldn’t feel any chemistry or sexual attraction between them. But the first time they had sex it was so damn hot, it blew my mind. The chemistry happened so fast, it gave me whiplash. One moment I was thinking well this romance thing is gonna suck and the next second I’m literally gulping and panting because…DAMN!!! I promise to never ever ever doubt you again Amy Lane! And I liked that Galen was possessive of John because it was about time someone gave that much crap about him, but most of all I loved Galen’s honesty…

“I don’t think anyone in your life has ever loved you the way I do, John Carey, and I am very possessive. Tory may not have cared if you were with other people. Whoever else you’ve had in your bed may not have been particularly… personal. But I will be jealous, possessive, and every inch the bitchy, clingy boyfriend, until you pry me from your side with a crowbar and throw me to the crows. Are we understood?”

I really liked that Galen and John had completely different backgrounds. Galen had been an only child and he was showered with adoration from both his parents. He was especially close to his mother but both his mother and his father were accepting of his sexuality and loved him unconditionally.

John grew up with an abusive, bigoted father who loved to knock him around and bully those weaker than him. His mother was more interested in climbing the social lather than being a good parent to John. There were only two people whom John loved: Tory and his nana; unfortunately, only one of them loved him back. I loved the memory of nana, what a wonderful old lady! She was so real and full of life and unapologetic for living her life the way she wanted to. I think she was the only reason John turned out to be such a good person.
“God, John missed his nana. Corrupt and genteel, brisk and kind, that woman called a fool a fool and her family a blight on the pimple on humanity’s ass.”

This story was much easier to read, and it was nowhere near as gutting as Chase in Shadow. It still had its sad moments, it still made me cry (JUST ONCE), but there was a healthy dose of sarcasm and some humor so artfully placed, I found myself laughing while feeling my heart start to break. “Are you hiding a geek from me?” John asked. “Yes. He’s in my penis; would you like to speak with him?” And John’s email to Scott the psycho was hysterical:

Dear psychopath, I’ll publish my drug addiction in the goddamned Sacramento Bee, but you will never again have access to my money, my employees, or my company. We are filing a restraining order, and feel free to suck the come out of your own ass before you contact us again.
Sincerely, your former employer and former junkie,
John Carey


And as much as I started the book with the idea that John is an ass and sure that I was going to absolutely hate Galen, wouldn’t you know I ended up loving them both. They are both very complex and there is so much growth we witness in both of them. They better themselves as individuals in order to feel like they deserve each other and all that hard work doesn’t happen overnight.

I enjoyed seeing most of the Johnnies’ cast; at least the guys we all got to know and love. I love their relationships, their friendships, and the family they all built together. I like how supportive they are and how they have each other’s backs. And somehow, as much as I love them all, Dex is still my favorite. I simply adore him even more than before, if such a thing is possible.

Great writing, amazing characters, priceless life lessons, and well let’s not forget the hot sex because that’s important as well; this book is a great little package. Everyone that loves the MM genre should read it.



* I received a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review through http://mmgoodbookreviews.wordpress.com *
Profile Image for Sandra.
4,121 reviews13 followers
February 1, 2015
Although Dex in Blue is still my all-time favorite, this is a nice addition to the Johnnies series. John is the slightly older (35) guy who runs Johnnies, so he's not a 'sex-object' the way the younger guys/porn stars are. But that's no reason he can't be sexy. He finds a lover who reminds him that he is attractive and there are many things to love about him. I liked this story line, him building himself back up after what amounts to a life-long bad (borderline emotional abusive) relationship, although it could have been steamier.

This is definitely lacking on the sex, compared to the other books. The sex scene was hot, and I liked the sexy skyping and phone convos, but the problem is that those were mostly alluded to. I wanted to hear Galen's dirty phone sex, and see his reaction to John's sexy Skype video Not sure why those were skipped .

I didn't mind the time apart. From a relationship perspective it did make sense. There is a reason people aren't supposed to dive into relationships right after rehab, so I appreciated that they talked about it and that the guys wanted to stand on their own. But we needed one more chapter! WTF. Don't get me wrong, I like catching up with our other guys. But I really don't appreciate the parade of previous characters at the end of a book (no need for it, except as it related to John) and the gratuitous set-up of the next book. Then slap Galen in and... over.

I was worried I would get annoyed by the flashbacks, but they were used sparingly and helped to understand John and Tory's relationship and dynamic. It was sad and sweet and set the stage. It helped to understand John's reactions and how although he was devastated by Tory's death, it was also a bit of a relief. He could finally move on with his life, and I loved how Galen helped him do it, although I would have liked to see more of Galen .

Received from the publisher in exchange for an honest review, reviewed for Hearts On Fire
Profile Image for Taya:).
499 reviews45 followers
January 29, 2015
I have decided to not be stingy with my five star rating today. I love Johnny and Galen. The banter between them was just YES!!YES!!

Book 1: Still not in right mindset to read it.
Book 2: The Best
Book 3: *sigh*
Book4: Awesomesauce read of 2015 and has a place next to book 2 for different reasons.
Book 5: Bobby and ??? (You'll found out)
Profile Image for Heidi.
949 reviews2 followers
September 23, 2015
“It’s… it’s the difference between painting rain and standing in it, I guess. When you paint it, you’re breaking it down to color, composition, emotional impact. But when you’re standing in it, it’s all about….”
“Dancing in the rain,”


Classic Amy Lane and another excellent read.
Profile Image for Otila.
364 reviews28 followers
February 10, 2015
This was not as angsty or as smexy as the previous books in the series but I really enjoyed John's story.

I was a little disappointed in the ending. I wanted an epilogue and then I got it so I'm good.

http://lovebytesreviews.com/2015/02/0...
Profile Image for Deanna.
2,735 reviews65 followers
February 4, 2015
How can an author take a guy who was an addict and a total as----- and transform him into a sympathetic character that deserves his own book. Seems impossible, but Amy Lane did just that.

My favorite line in the book:

"Okay, so I get it - high concept, simple dick! It's gonna be great!"

This is the story of John, the inspiration for The Johnnies. He has a drug problem that is about to severly damage his business, his employees and himself. Dex (Oh I love him) steps in and takes John to rehab. Just as he is leaving rehab, he gets word that Tory, his first friend, his first love, his first everything has committed suicide. Tory has left specific instructions for John to handle the last rites. Tory was a self-centered boy and then man, but John loved hims always. That love has come close to destroying John. Handling the details of a funeral may finish the job.

There were three boys who were thrown out of their homes the night the were caught in the act. They each lost all contact with their families. John had always been physically abused by his father. He loved going to Tory's house because of his loud, loving family. That was gone after that night and affected them as they grew to adulthood. As the author states in her Note:

Children who trust that home is a kind and loving place that accepts them for who they are don't usually look for sex and porn in the wrong places at too young an age.

John did not reject the duty that would take him from rehab to Florida. This story is his journey through the past to find self acceptance for his presence and hope for his future if he can stay off drugs.

This is not the most emotional of the Johnnies' stories. The sex is not as much or as hot. However I was with John as he struggled and remembered. The story concentrates on John and Galen, their cravings and their pain. I like that we got to know them and their past without the other Johnnies, as much as I love those guys. They loved quickly, but that is not bad in such a story. I love the ending. Wonderful read.
Profile Image for Blue Bayou . .
503 reviews18 followers
January 29, 2015
Who loves a day off to read an Amy Lane book?! I do. I do.

I wasnt shocked John could overcome and be more than the dickhead in Dex in Blue.

I am currently catching on the to the term 'feels'. This one didn't have the major feels that I have associated with Mrs. Lane. I didn't feel John and Galen's romance as much as I think I could have. It was pretty quick (too quick) they way they fell into one another. Especially with the reason John was there, where John had just been and the issues that Galen was going through. Once past that part the rest seemed genuine. Sometimes we all need to have our time, to get ourselves together, on our own. And hopefully the people waiting will trust that we will get it together. That part worked for me.
What didn't work was the sex. There is a distinct lack of sex in this one. Wait, there was sex but it was almost all singular sex. It was hot, I cannot lie, however part of the genius that is Amy Lane is showing how emotions, feelings and love can be illuminated through physical intimacy. Not to say phone/video/skype then can't be intimate, it can, but physical touch (hello Ethan) is what Amy Lane does so well!

The ending was not what I would have wanted. I knew, by gaging the percent read, that it was going to happen that way. Suffice to say I was hoping for more but with saying hi to everyone ever introduced in the series, then setting up the next book it detracted from what I think John and Galen needed to really seal the deal.
Amy Lane can weave a story that you just can't put down! Even when its not a favorite and the pieces don't fall together as smoothly as maybe they did in other books, I still spent my day reading.
Profile Image for Barb ~rede-2-read~.
3,741 reviews113 followers
March 9, 2015
I enjoyed this story but I'm at a loss for what to say in a review. Thankfully I'm not reviewing this one for a blog. I had a few areas of confusion where I felt there was a discrepancy in the story that bothered me. Most were minor but I think if I was beta reading I surely would have been hitting the comment button.

Then I also had a few issues related to two recovering addicts helping each other. I've worked in the recovery field and was sorry to see there wasn't mention of a support group for any of these guys in this story who were recovering addicts. It's been my experience that relapse is the norm when an addict is left to his own thinking or, worse, when two addicts are thinking for each other.

However, I loved the way Amy Lane humanized John, the guy we loved to hate in some of the past stories. I loved to love him by the end of this story, and one of the things I've found most rewarding in working with people in recovery is when we discover the beautiful person on the inside, so kudos to the author's insights into John. And Galen, what can I say? A guy I wanted to dislike so many times in this story, and yet I loved him and was rooting for him as he struggled through the last year.

So, I was going to say that my review will follow. And maybe I will elaborate on these musings in the near future, but what I've put down here will be enough to jog my memory when I wonder whether or not I'm going to reread this one and why I didn't rate it a 5.
Profile Image for Maria.
716 reviews38 followers
May 20, 2015
Amy Lane, sometimes you manage to enthrall me. Now is one of those times. I knew in the beginning that I liked Galen and not so much John, weird huh? But that John and I could be friends, well, I learned to really like both of these former addicts a lot. Stop. The. Presses. Beautiful love story of hope. Getting over the rainbow and once you are there, figuring out how you can live happily ever after. Yeah, it really is possible to stay clean, to stay in love, to stay happy, healthy and whole. Thank you Amy Lane for reminding me that every day is a new day and we never, ever give up hope. I'll remember that as I go off to work today. Beyond the stars really. Superbly written love story about two addicts. It's the real deal folks. Highly recommended.
Profile Image for Santy.
1,258 reviews76 followers
February 17, 2023
Loved this! It was a very fitting end to a great series!

I adored Gale's dry humor and loved the very human path to recovery that he undertook.

I also really liked that we got to know John's tragic backstory and how he made it out of it.His was a very very very unconventional childhood/adolescence (If we can even call it that) with insane attitudes ,antics and the dysfunctional families and friends to boot. It' a miracle he made it out of it.

Anywhoo! All the other stories in the series were rounded up nicely and come on, who doesn't like a HEA? ;)
Profile Image for Purplegirl .
345 reviews84 followers
March 6, 2015
I love this series. This wasn't my favorite of the series but I still enjoyed the book. Galen and John were good together. It was a little unbelievable with the quickness of their bonding but I could easily let that go. Overall, a good story but it seemed to be missing something but I'm not sure what. Maybe it was not as heavy and downright sad as the other ones.
Profile Image for BWT.
2,250 reviews245 followers
February 17, 2016
Belens Audio Book Review

While the players and the setting changes, the game remains the same. Gomez Pugh picks up the narration for the final installment of the Johnnies series, and does it beautifully. Pugh consistently delivers a dynamic and impressive performance.

While the other three books in the series focused on the Johnnies set and life in and around Sacramento, Black John focuses more on the characters, on Johnnies owner, John Carey, in particular, and is set mainly in Florida.

John has just completed a stint in rehab for a long-time cocaine addiction when he receives word that the first person he ever loved, Vittorio "Tory" Petrelli has taken his own life and left a will asking John to release his ashes into the sea.
And John couldn’t even be mad. Because before Dex, who hadn’t loved him back, there’d been Tory, who had. Maybe. He’d loved John and John had loved him, John hoped, and they’d made porn together—gorgeous, aching, sexy porn—but it hadn’t been enough. It hadn’t been enough that John had worshipped him, hadn’t been enough that John had placed him in the sun and let the world worship him. No.
In the end, there weren’t enough cocks or enough coke to fill that thing in Tory, the emptiness carved by emotional neglect, by a world that hadn’t been able to laugh with Tory but had certainly made him cry.
Oh God, they had certainly made each other cry.
John didn’t remember when he’d fallen to his knees. He was too busy staring at his fist with the crumpled letter in it, even as he howled until he couldn’t catch his breath.

amanda-seyfried crying-sobbing-upset
When John arrives back in Florida to clean out Tory's apartment and get rid of his stuff, he meets Tory's next door neighbor, Galen Henderson, who helps John with the apartment cleanup, and emotional support. The two work their way through Tory's things, and piece together his final days.
“Oh God,” John whispered. “Tory. I get it. You wanted to go back.”
Back to before. They came out too soon, and the world was too painful. They ripped out of the tight wrappings of youth, not fed enough on love, not fed enough on security, to want to stay children anymore. They’d been so sure that the world, the adventurous bright world, would be far more accommodating, but it hadn’t been. It had been brutal, and Tory had spent the next seventeen years trying to get back.
He was back.
He was wrapped tight in death’s womb, waiting for another chance to emerge.

In the process John and Galen grow closer and fall in love. Unfortunately, Galen is battling his own demons and has been hooked on painkillers since a terrible motorcycle accident left him with crippling pain, a limp, and scars.
“I’m sorry. It’s just… just… you don’t have to be a saint to want to be treated like a human being, do you know that? Yes, I know he’s an addict. So the hell what? You don’t write him off because of it. You don’t write me off because I care for him. We’re people, that’s all. Miserable, stupid, fucked-up people, and all we have in this world to hold on to is each other. Can you understand that?”

One of the things that nearly killed me was just how good the hurt/comfort is in this story. THIS is the kind of hurt/comfort I love, with fallible characters bringing a measure of something they've never had before to one another.

The characters are human, and flawed, and it's a sweet story at the base watching these two broken in different ways men come together and make a new life full of hope and possibility. Full of emotion, hope and hurt/comfort this final book in the series is a winner!

faith hope trust

Recommended.

Audio copy of Black John (Johnnies #4) provided by Dreamspinner Press in exchange of an honest review.

This review has been cross-posted at Gay Book Reviews.
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