Rudeness and Civility: Manners in 19th Century Urban America

by John F. Kasson

"Nothing, at first sight, seems less important than the external formalities of human behavior," Tocqueville stated in Democracy in America. "Yet there is nothing to which men attach more importance…the influence of social and political systems on manners is there worth serious consideration." Until now, Tocqueville's challenge has gone unanswered.

Here, John Kasson writes of the deep tensions created by the demands of democracy, the pressures of an expanding market economy, and the desire for social distinction. Vividly and with humor, he re-creates the deferential and often coarse society of colonial years, then its transformation as aspirations and social forms earlier restricted to the gentry became popularized.

The rapidly industrializing economy most intensively affected the booming cities. Etiquette advisers sought to instruct the rising middle class in ways of egalitarianism: how to present oneself at home and in public; how to express pleasure and affection and suppress anger and conflict; how to conduct oneself with decorum (no hissing, no rowdiness) at a concert or performance.

Mr. Kasson examines a host of diverse topics, from the "lost art of hat tipping" to the rise of the table fork and how to behave at table, to the writings of Poe, Melville, and William James. Rudeness and Civility is a rare book that is insightful and entertaining: it will make readers think about our manners in a fresh way.

"Apart from the original conceptualization and insightful analysis, even apart from the engaging writing style, one cannot help but delight in the pungency of detail Kasson provides. The symphony conductor as audience discioplinarian, the popularity of urban bird's-eye view lithographs, the hidden meaning of a folded calling card–these are the kinds of subjects that make Kasson's book as entertaining as it is illuminating."
-- Tamara Plakins Thornton, American Historical Review (June 1991)

Genres: History, Sociology, Nonfiction

317 pages, Hardcover

First published January 1, 1990

About the author

John F. Kasson is a professor of history and American studies at the University of North Carolina–Chapel Hill and the author of Amusing the Million, among many other seminal works of cultural history. He lives in Chapel Hill.

Reviews

[Sara]

So, I'm FINALLY done with this book. It was long, the print was tiny, and the sentences were such that any miniscule distraction meant you had to start the paragraph over again. Sometimes I spent my whole lunch break on two pages.
For these reasons, the book was equal parts fascinating and frustrating. I'm all for interesting nonfiction, but isn't there some line to walk on the entertaining side of scholarly? Here's a typical sentence: "The economic and social interests of many figures lay precisely in eluding discovery in order to exploit for their own selfish ends the possibilities of unstable and illegible identity as well as the ambiguous relationship between the social exchanges of respectable society and the economic exchanges of the marketplace..."
Of course, none of those words is unintelligible on its own, but combined into a four-line sentence, followed by another four-line sentence, and another, all crammed together in one paragraph in ten point font... it's what gives nonfiction it's "bad name".
Five stars for the information and the great firsthand sources he used, and three stars for the presentation. ...Granted, it might have been much easier to follow if I'd done all my reading in a silent room after meditating.

[Susan Raines]

A thoroughly researched book that explores the reasons for all those 19th century etiquette books. Very insightful writing about 19th century racism as well. Scholarly, yet highly accessible.

[Anson Cassel Mills]

This academic book—which the author freely admits is neither exhaustive nor comprehensive—treats the rise of manners among urban middle- and upper class Americans who sought a standard by which to assess social class in an ostensibly egalitarian nation. Nevertheless, readers uninterested in Kasson’s theories can ignore them easily enough while they enjoy his succession of illustrations taken from such diverse sources as etiquette books, crime literature, and the fiction of Poe and Melville. One serious omission is Kasson’s lack of reference to contemporary religious practice, which also became more mannerly despite the rise of the urban evangelistic campaign.

[David]

Fascinating exploration of how Americans adapted to urban life in the 19th century - in order to live closely together in this strange new environment people had to develop an entire set of behaviors that would allow them to interact with one another while at the same time maintaining some sense of control over who they were perceived to be by the public and the influence the public would have over an individual's identity. The elaborate framework of good manners and proper behavior that became a hallmark of this era was the result.

[Janice]

I read this for a class in college but was surprised by how much I enjoyed it. Full of fun stories about the development of manners in the US. It wasn't that long ago that it was totally acceptable to eat w/your hands!

[Foster Rakestraw]

i love this book!

[Holly George]

manners have improved

[Maria]

I learned about the history of politics of etiquette from America's colonial times through the nineteenth century.