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The Boomer Bible: The Ultimate Book of Revelations
In the beginning there was the Holy Bible
2 Which was a very good book indeed, but so many things happened since the beginning,
3 That Maybe it was time for another bible,
4 So a punk from Philadelphia wrote a new one,
5 And so it is called The Boomer Bible,
6 So there.
7 And Its Past Testament tells the history of the world, including the Book of Greeks, Book of Brits, Book of Yanks, Book of Russkies, and all the other self-proclaimed Chosen Nations,
8 And people sticking each other with pointed sticks, and acting up, which is called civilization,
9 And also about religion and art and movies and literature, and TV, and so forth, which is why there are also the Books of Pnowlege,
10 Including Psongs, Psayings, and Psomethings,
11 Written just like the other Bible but without any big unpronounceable words,
12 So that you and I might truly understand it,
13 For a change.
14 And Its Present Testament tells about the coming of Harry, and The Way of Harry,
15 Who may be the messiah everybody has been waiting for,
16 Unless he really isn't,
17 Which is hard to say,
18 So there.
19 And there is also The Book of Harrier Brayer together with the Harrier Hymnal,
20 And another Testament too,
21 And Concordance, and a lenticular hand on the cover.
22 And It is not for the faint of heart,
23 Or the easily offended,
24 Or the priggish or the prudish,
25 But who cares,
26 Because neither was Candide, or Swift's A Modest Proposal, or Rabelais, or Lenny Bruce
28 Or all the other satires and satirists who felt the need to warn us when we have gone astray,
29 Which we have,
29 Which you'll know all about,
31 If you read your Boomer Bible,
32 Or there.
Over 87,000 copies in print.
2 Which was a very good book indeed, but so many things happened since the beginning,
3 That Maybe it was time for another bible,
4 So a punk from Philadelphia wrote a new one,
5 And so it is called The Boomer Bible,
6 So there.
7 And Its Past Testament tells the history of the world, including the Book of Greeks, Book of Brits, Book of Yanks, Book of Russkies, and all the other self-proclaimed Chosen Nations,
8 And people sticking each other with pointed sticks, and acting up, which is called civilization,
9 And also about religion and art and movies and literature, and TV, and so forth, which is why there are also the Books of Pnowlege,
10 Including Psongs, Psayings, and Psomethings,
11 Written just like the other Bible but without any big unpronounceable words,
12 So that you and I might truly understand it,
13 For a change.
14 And Its Present Testament tells about the coming of Harry, and The Way of Harry,
15 Who may be the messiah everybody has been waiting for,
16 Unless he really isn't,
17 Which is hard to say,
18 So there.
19 And there is also The Book of Harrier Brayer together with the Harrier Hymnal,
20 And another Testament too,
21 And Concordance, and a lenticular hand on the cover.
22 And It is not for the faint of heart,
23 Or the easily offended,
24 Or the priggish or the prudish,
25 But who cares,
26 Because neither was Candide, or Swift's A Modest Proposal, or Rabelais, or Lenny Bruce
28 Or all the other satires and satirists who felt the need to warn us when we have gone astray,
29 Which we have,
29 Which you'll know all about,
31 If you read your Boomer Bible,
32 Or there.
Over 87,000 copies in print.
896 pages, Paperback
First published January 10, 1991
10 people are currently reading
191 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 32 reviews
June 9, 2008
This book is a cautionary tale, a stinging indictment of a culture that's lost its way. But believe it or not, it's absolutely hilarious, as long as you aren't afraid to have your cherished beliefs held up to scorn and ridicule, and as long as you're open to learning a lesson from it. In short, if you can laugh at yourself and at what we've become as a society, you'll have a fantastic time reading this imposing book.
In chapter-and-verse form (complete with an intercolumn reference), Laird lays out the history of the world from the perspective of an intellectually lazy modern mind that's been educated by TV and has been conditioned to think in terms of short-term gain and instant gratification. If you've ever seen Mike Judge's excellent movie "Idiocracy," you'll have some idea of the perspective from which this book is written.
Laird seems to think this sorry state of affairs began with the baby boomer generation. The messiah of the "New Testament" equivalent of the book is Harry, a con man who came of age during the era of the hippies and preaches a narcissistic message of "Desire, Certainty, and Blame." Get what you can, jump to conclusions, and if something goes wrong, it's somebody else's fault.
When the rot set in is open for debate, of course, but when you read this book and then look around you at a postmodern world where the most important thing in people's lives is who wins a reality show, and the hottest debate is which presidential candidate doesn't wear a flag pin on his lapel, you can easily get yourself depressed and say that Laird got it right. In fact, as you cringe at the toxic mixture of ignorance and indifference in the narrative, it is not a huge stretch to imagine having just such a conversation with some halfwits whom classical education failed miserably. You know the type -- they couldn't tell you the first thing about American history if their lives depended on it. They probably couldn't find America on a map of the world, for that matter. Hell, they probably couldn't even spell "America" if you spotted them the vowels.
In Laird's story, these people are the punks, and in a cruel twist, the only hope for saving humanity is in their hands. Of all people, these violent, semi-literate thugs have taken it upon themselves to set the world right again. You get the sense that the task is too big for them, but at least Laird offers us some glimmer of hope, however faint it may be.
Laird saw all of this coming back in 1991. Heaven only knows what kind of book he would have written post-9/11.
In chapter-and-verse form (complete with an intercolumn reference), Laird lays out the history of the world from the perspective of an intellectually lazy modern mind that's been educated by TV and has been conditioned to think in terms of short-term gain and instant gratification. If you've ever seen Mike Judge's excellent movie "Idiocracy," you'll have some idea of the perspective from which this book is written.
Laird seems to think this sorry state of affairs began with the baby boomer generation. The messiah of the "New Testament" equivalent of the book is Harry, a con man who came of age during the era of the hippies and preaches a narcissistic message of "Desire, Certainty, and Blame." Get what you can, jump to conclusions, and if something goes wrong, it's somebody else's fault.
When the rot set in is open for debate, of course, but when you read this book and then look around you at a postmodern world where the most important thing in people's lives is who wins a reality show, and the hottest debate is which presidential candidate doesn't wear a flag pin on his lapel, you can easily get yourself depressed and say that Laird got it right. In fact, as you cringe at the toxic mixture of ignorance and indifference in the narrative, it is not a huge stretch to imagine having just such a conversation with some halfwits whom classical education failed miserably. You know the type -- they couldn't tell you the first thing about American history if their lives depended on it. They probably couldn't find America on a map of the world, for that matter. Hell, they probably couldn't even spell "America" if you spotted them the vowels.
In Laird's story, these people are the punks, and in a cruel twist, the only hope for saving humanity is in their hands. Of all people, these violent, semi-literate thugs have taken it upon themselves to set the world right again. You get the sense that the task is too big for them, but at least Laird offers us some glimmer of hope, however faint it may be.
Laird saw all of this coming back in 1991. Heaven only knows what kind of book he would have written post-9/11.
August 23, 2010
I just finished this for the first time; I know there will be others.
The Facts: It's book which follows the stylistic format of a standard Christian bible in the form of books, chapters, verses, inter-column reference, standard prayers, functions of ministerial office and hymns. The subject is an examination of Baby Boomer ethos and pathos, with inevitable examination of what preceded and followed it. It's a long book, as many repeatedly state. I'm not sure why anyone thinks that's relevant, though.
REVIEW:
Yes, it's offensive. The intent of offensiveness, however, is always relevant. If the intent of being offensive is to persuade others to concur (i.e. racist speeches) of course the proper course of action is to take offense. On the other hand, if the sole purpose of offensive material is to make an audience think regardless of agreement, the first proper reaction is TO THINK CAREFULLY. Whining about being offended by intellectually challenging discourse is like whining about the exertion of a voluntary workout with a trainer.
This book is essential reading for every parent with a child still in school, still a member of the "I" generation who believes the mathematical proof of justice is RIGHT = FAIR = SATISFACTORY TO ME. Generation X can learn from this; we went a step further and produced a generation more insulated from conscientious and emotional discomfort and sacrifice than financial. This Punk generation won't save the world; they'll save themselves.
As for language, we have stripped penmanship from our schools so college graduates have the no-longer charming scrawl of a 3rd-grader...and the language to match. Why shouldn't they, when we teach them than the physical craftsmanship of words is insignificant?
Any book which so magnificently resurrects the life and purpose of language will have a permanent place on my shelf. Read it.
The Facts: It's book which follows the stylistic format of a standard Christian bible in the form of books, chapters, verses, inter-column reference, standard prayers, functions of ministerial office and hymns. The subject is an examination of Baby Boomer ethos and pathos, with inevitable examination of what preceded and followed it. It's a long book, as many repeatedly state. I'm not sure why anyone thinks that's relevant, though.
REVIEW:
Yes, it's offensive. The intent of offensiveness, however, is always relevant. If the intent of being offensive is to persuade others to concur (i.e. racist speeches) of course the proper course of action is to take offense. On the other hand, if the sole purpose of offensive material is to make an audience think regardless of agreement, the first proper reaction is TO THINK CAREFULLY. Whining about being offended by intellectually challenging discourse is like whining about the exertion of a voluntary workout with a trainer.
This book is essential reading for every parent with a child still in school, still a member of the "I" generation who believes the mathematical proof of justice is RIGHT = FAIR = SATISFACTORY TO ME. Generation X can learn from this; we went a step further and produced a generation more insulated from conscientious and emotional discomfort and sacrifice than financial. This Punk generation won't save the world; they'll save themselves.
As for language, we have stripped penmanship from our schools so college graduates have the no-longer charming scrawl of a 3rd-grader...and the language to match. Why shouldn't they, when we teach them than the physical craftsmanship of words is insignificant?
Any book which so magnificently resurrects the life and purpose of language will have a permanent place on my shelf. Read it.
December 29, 2013
The Wall Street Journal describes my next inseparable tote: "It's the kind of book that makes you laugh, makes you angry, makes you question, makes you cringe, makes you think and shout yes! in agreement. It's the kind of book that thoroughly defines its times."
Yes, it is certainly RF Laird's Boomer Bible, Workman Publishing New York. "He captures the conflict of the Boomer era -- growing up with the Ten Commandments, the Four Gospels, and the Golden Rule, and coming of age in the era of sex, drugs, and gimme gimme gimme."
From the opening Book of Kinesis to 649 pages later the end Book of Rationalizations, platitudes to live by a' plenty. My elegant paperback copy has appendices included the Brayers, Catechism, and Hymnal.
Yes, it is certainly RF Laird's Boomer Bible, Workman Publishing New York. "He captures the conflict of the Boomer era -- growing up with the Ten Commandments, the Four Gospels, and the Golden Rule, and coming of age in the era of sex, drugs, and gimme gimme gimme."
From the opening Book of Kinesis to 649 pages later the end Book of Rationalizations, platitudes to live by a' plenty. My elegant paperback copy has appendices included the Brayers, Catechism, and Hymnal.
July 29, 2007
Really funny in a few spots, but with little overall cohesion. The entire second half ("the gospels") were basically lost on me. However the first half ("the books") are quite irreverent and witty.
I only give it three stars, and that might be stretching it. My advice is read until it stops being funny, then hand it off. If you make it to the end, you are slightly warped and probably from Philadelphia (you'd have to read it to understand).
I only give it three stars, and that might be stretching it. My advice is read until it stops being funny, then hand it off. If you make it to the end, you are slightly warped and probably from Philadelphia (you'd have to read it to understand).
August 16, 2016
The first half of this book was wonderful, a touchstone for knowledge of history, pop culture, countries and people's idiosyncracies. Then it lost me. The second half was repetitive. Harry and his creed soon grew tiresome and I kept waiting for the writer to move on and was disappointed. Harry, frankly, bored me. There were nuggets of interest here and there but wading through the verbiage of message of drink, drugs, don't think was a hard slog to the end.
July 8, 2008
At the time this came out, it made a huge impression on me for its ambitious, wide-ranging, and usually understated humor. In later years, the conservative bias is a lot easier to see, and it goes on way, way too long. But the first third or so is still pretty great.
April 25, 2011
Somehow the author of a long, snooze-inducing list of military and political histories creates one of the greatest satires of American culture. 1 Part Jonathan Swift, 1 part Nathaniel West, 2 parts Douglas Adams and a dash of Stephen Jay Gould.
December 3, 2007
Desire. Certainty. Blame.
February 23, 2008
If at first you do not laugh, cross reference.
November 28, 2022
A confession, as befits a Bible: I am too young to be a Baby Boomer and too old to fall into Generation X. I prefer to go with Richard Hell of the Voidoids who sang "I belong to the Blank Generation/ And I can take it or leave it each time". A girl friend gave me this book in college what what astounded me foremost is that it really is a Bible; every verse is a counterpart to the one dictated by God to the Jews and Christians. But, this being a Boomer-centric Bible, the passages allude to the growth and decay of the greatest nation ever to walk the Earth. Put LEAVE TO BEAVER reruns in place of the parting of the Red Sea. Give the Great Stanley credit for having discovered the origins of humankind in 2001. Or, the delivery of mankind from sin by the discovery of the birth control pill. College humor? Yes, since this was the first generation to go to college en masse and get to brag about it. THE BOOMER BIBLE is by turns eschatological, scatological, cinematic, scientific, and offensive to every race, gender, age group, religion and political belief. Darwin once proclaimed "what a Devil's Bible one could write based on the evidence from nature!" THE BOOMER BIBLE is the Devil's Bible for those born post-1946 and grew very self-important during the Sixties.
November 1, 2025
This book is a joke. One joke, to be exact: let’s spoof the Bible (something I’m all for) with 600 pages of chapter and verse. I cannot begin to imagine the years of work that it took to write this.
The result is disappointing. The first 50 pages about the history of mankind are kind of interesting, the history of specific countries for the next 100 pages much less so, then there’s lots of nonsense (psongs?) that I skipped, only to be bored by a very long stretch about famous people (Adam Smith, Sigmund Freud, et al.).
And then it completely falls apart in the second half, which is supposed to be kind of a New Testament about a guy called Harry. The trouble with Harry, so to say, is that he is dull. He keeps saying stuff and meeting people, but I don’t care at all.
Two stars, for effort.
The result is disappointing. The first 50 pages about the history of mankind are kind of interesting, the history of specific countries for the next 100 pages much less so, then there’s lots of nonsense (psongs?) that I skipped, only to be bored by a very long stretch about famous people (Adam Smith, Sigmund Freud, et al.).
And then it completely falls apart in the second half, which is supposed to be kind of a New Testament about a guy called Harry. The trouble with Harry, so to say, is that he is dull. He keeps saying stuff and meeting people, but I don’t care at all.
Two stars, for effort.
April 18, 2021
The Boomer Bible is one of the most profound and challenging works you will ever read, if you are interested in understanding American culture and seek to improve the status quo. Laird comes at it from a conservative position, but there is much to learn here regardless of your political ideology or religious beliefs if you are willing to invest the time and effort. Shammadamma.
December 18, 2023
I didn’t read the whole thing, but read it in fits and bits and starts, when ever I had a moment with nothing to do. I had a few of those, instead of solving cryptograms and sudokus. Otherwise I was reading other books.
June 5, 2013
This book may seem sacrilegious on the cover, and in fact, it is written in the style of modern (non-Latin, non-Catholic) Bibles. It's not, particularly, however, instead, it is a collection of incredible observations about what many people of my generation actually believe. Mine, I suppose, and others too.
It has
The Past Testament contains a comprehensive view of science, history, philosophy, morality, and literature as understood by the Baby Boomers from pop culture and an ineffective educational system:
The Books of Apes (Kinesis, Apes, Names, Gods, and Lies) which describe prehistory.
The Books of peoples (Gypsies, Mesopotamians, Greeks, Romans, Barbarians, Christians, Bubonites, Giants, Explorers, Spics, Frogs, Brits, Krauts,
Yanks, Beaks, Russkies, Chinks, Nips, and Others) which describe the history of various peoples of the Earth.
The "PS" books (Psongs, Psayings, Psomethings, Pnotes, and Pspeciasties) which contain everything from the prayers of a Gatsby-like character for money, to poorly remembered snippets of literature, to numerology worthy of Nostradamus
The Books of the VIPs (Adam, Chuck, Carl, Ziggie, Dave, Al, Paul, Frankie & Johnny, Ed, and Jeffrey) which describe various famous pioneers in the Western canon and what became of their efforts.
The Present Testament concerns the life of Harry, a kind of cynical Jesus spreading "Consolation" in the form of cocaine, with Philadelphia substituting for the Holy Lands:
Four "gospels," (Willie, Vinnie, Ned, and Ira), the first three synoptic.
The Book of Exploits, roughly equivalent to Acts
The Letters to the peoples of Philadelphia (Hillites, Annenburghers, Jeffersonians, Kensingtonians, Swarthmorons, Hallites, Drexelites, Boulevardiers, Pennsylvanians, Forgers, Wharts, Mawrites, Centralian, Mallites, Mainliners, and Broadstreeters), each adopting the rhetorical style, tone, or vernacular of the corresponding constituencies
The Book of Rationalizations, roughly equivalent to Revelation, dictated by Harry's father, Dave
You can't go wrong with this one.
It has
The Past Testament contains a comprehensive view of science, history, philosophy, morality, and literature as understood by the Baby Boomers from pop culture and an ineffective educational system:
The Books of Apes (Kinesis, Apes, Names, Gods, and Lies) which describe prehistory.
The Books of peoples (Gypsies, Mesopotamians, Greeks, Romans, Barbarians, Christians, Bubonites, Giants, Explorers, Spics, Frogs, Brits, Krauts,
Yanks, Beaks, Russkies, Chinks, Nips, and Others) which describe the history of various peoples of the Earth.
The "PS" books (Psongs, Psayings, Psomethings, Pnotes, and Pspeciasties) which contain everything from the prayers of a Gatsby-like character for money, to poorly remembered snippets of literature, to numerology worthy of Nostradamus
The Books of the VIPs (Adam, Chuck, Carl, Ziggie, Dave, Al, Paul, Frankie & Johnny, Ed, and Jeffrey) which describe various famous pioneers in the Western canon and what became of their efforts.
The Present Testament concerns the life of Harry, a kind of cynical Jesus spreading "Consolation" in the form of cocaine, with Philadelphia substituting for the Holy Lands:
Four "gospels," (Willie, Vinnie, Ned, and Ira), the first three synoptic.
The Book of Exploits, roughly equivalent to Acts
The Letters to the peoples of Philadelphia (Hillites, Annenburghers, Jeffersonians, Kensingtonians, Swarthmorons, Hallites, Drexelites, Boulevardiers, Pennsylvanians, Forgers, Wharts, Mawrites, Centralian, Mallites, Mainliners, and Broadstreeters), each adopting the rhetorical style, tone, or vernacular of the corresponding constituencies
The Book of Rationalizations, roughly equivalent to Revelation, dictated by Harry's father, Dave
You can't go wrong with this one.
September 9, 2010
I wish I could split this book up into parts and rate them separately. I found the pre-Harry stuff to be an awesome epic-poem/bible-formatted history of the world. The P* sections were kind of a waste of time. The Harry stuff was fun at first, and then it just started to disturb me. By the end of the gospels and stories and communications from the ultra-Harriers, I was completely against the Harry message and feeling pretty down about the state of the world. Then there's a bunch of crap about vestments and brayers and litanies and such. And then, there was the book of Punks. The book of Punks surprisingly redeemed the entire book for me, and I finished feeling hopeful, and surprised that I was hopeful.
I'd recommend this book to anyone who won't fly off the handle when reading offensively accurate if a bit generalized descriptions of their culture/history/religion/belief system.
I'd recommend this book to anyone who won't fly off the handle when reading offensively accurate if a bit generalized descriptions of their culture/history/religion/belief system.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
September 29, 2007
I think this one is going to be an ongoing read between others books (it's definitely a lot more enjoyable to pick up than the New Penguin History of the World). There was a Boomer Bible movement in my family when I was growing up, and I remember much discussion and laughter about the testaments. Now I see why.
September 17, 2007
There's no review that could possibly do this book justice. Please, just look into it. I'm surprised this book hasn't started a war yet. I will say, though, that precious few books in my entire life have afforded me as many hours of side-splitting laughter and completely comical contempt.
NC
NC
April 11, 2007
This one had a disturbingly big impact on my life when I read it way back when. For some, it's Lord of the Rings, I guess for me it was the Boomer Bible.
September 12, 2015
Words cannot explain this book.
October 25, 2007
This is one of the most hilarious satires ever written!
November 2, 2007
it takes dedication to satirize the history of the entire world, but someone needed to do it.
underneath the sarcastic humor, it's a little sad. SO IS LIFE, AMIRITE!!
underneath the sarcastic humor, it's a little sad. SO IS LIFE, AMIRITE!!
January 28, 2008
What a delicious romp. My jaws hurt after the first day I had laughed so hard so long and so what!
January 30, 2008
stupendous.
January 19, 2009
too long!!!!!!
May 16, 2009
Hilarious spoof, and when it first was published, I gave it to all my friends and relatives for Christmas. Such a wonderful commentary on modern life.
December 12, 2010
This book is a wonderful parody of the bible. It gives a humorous look at the beliefs and history as we recognize it
Want to read
May 25, 2012My Godfather had this book on his humor shelf and I picked it up and was rofl when I read a few of the passages. He tells me that the book was written by an ad executive in the 90's.
June 21, 2012
A hilarious book that pokes fun at religion, politics, history, and human stupidity.
April 16, 2014
I first read this as a 17 year old, it still holds up and the humor is not lost on me.
June 2, 2014
Fun stuff, if you enjoy history and have a sense of humor. Well before Harry Potter, but there is a great deal of Hymns to a Harry.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 32 reviews