Reclaiming Desire: 4 Keys to Finding Your Lost Libido

by Andrew Goldstein, Marianne Brandon

I'm so busy and tired, how can I find time for sex? How can I go from mommy one minute to passionate lover the next? What medicines or natural herbs can I take to improve my libido? At some point in their lives, most women experience a decline in their sexual desire. Yet despite the vast number of books devoted to sex, surprisingly few focus on the problem of low libido. Fewer still offer any practical advice to the woman who has lost her sex drive and longs to find it again. Reclaiming Desire presents the holistic approach that gynecologist Andrew Goldstein and clinical psychologist Marianne Brandon—co-founders of the Sexual Wellness Center in Annapolis, Maryland—use to successfully treat women with low libido. Capitalizing on their combined medical and psychological expertise, they reveal how a complex set of physical, emotional, intellectual, and spiritual factors—as well as specific life-changing events such as marriage, pregnancy, childbirth, divorce, and menopause—can affect female sex drive. Reading this book, women will come to understand that low libido isn't "all in their heads"—or all in their bodies, for that matter. The problem is real and it's diverse—but it's curable.

Genres: Sexuality, Psychology, Nonfiction

338 pages, Kindle Edition

First published May 11, 2004

Reviews

[Gwen · Rating 3 out of 5]

I mainly wanted to read this book to see if the authors mentioned asexuality. I was happy to discover they mentioned it about three times, although not always in the best (or most in depth) way. I really like that the authors pointed out very early in the book that low libido is only a problem if the person who has the low libido thinks it's a problem, and that there are people out there who are happy with their low libido and it doesn't necessarily affect them (or their relationships) negatively.
Overall, I think there's some sound advice in here for anyone, regardless of libido status.
I will say that the book was a bit too pro-higher libido for my liking, however, it wasn't too overly done. I think there's a fine line when it comes to sexual activity and encouraging people to engage in sexual activity when they don't want it. The (sexual) needs of each person in a relationship are important (no one more than the other), so, I don't think it's necessarily healthy or always the best to meet the needs of the higher libido person at the expense of the lower libido one and, at some point, the difference in libido (or in sexuality) is just incompatible. I think the book would've been better if it addressed incompatibility (and possible separation) as a very real and legitimate option for relationships.
Also, the book could be a bit repetitive at times.

[Melissa McDonald]

Low libido is the most common sexual disorder in American women, affecting an estimated 22 to 43 percent of the female population. And, according to authors Goldstein (a gynecologist) and Brandon (a clinical psychologist), the problem is more complex than most therapists realize. "A decline in sexual desire seldom has a single cause," they argue. "The collection of factors that influences a woman�s sex drive is as unique as the woman herself." Drawing upon their experience at the Sexual Wellness Center in Annapolis, Maryland, an institution that they founded, the authors advocate a holistic treatment that addresses four spheres of a woman�s life: physical health, emotional resilience, intellectual fulfillment and spiritual contentment.