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I've Fallen and there's a Tentacle in my Butt #1
I've Fallen and there's a Tentacle in my Butt
There was a mishap in a lab during a sexual experiment that was being conducted on a naked young woman. A door that contained a creature with tentacles had cracked open by mistake. The monster became enraged when the test subject couldn’t continue to orgasm and smashed the door open. The lab technicians tried to get the monster under control and in the process severed one of its tentacles. The tentacle escaped from the lab to the outside world. The scientist conducting the experiment rushed out after the tentacle. She knew that if she didn’t catch the tentacle before it could find a human host, then it would spawn another creature and the city would be in danger. Will she find the tentacle before it nestles in some unsuspecting person’s warm orifice?
14 pages, Kindle Edition
First published August 30, 2013
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85 people want to read
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February 14, 2022HAPPY V-DAY, LOVERS!
there is no such thing as "good" monsterporn or "bad" monsterporn. just like there is no such thing as a "good" rainbow or a "bad" rainbow. the existence of monsterporn is something to celebrate because it's a little slice of unexpected joy that exists simply to bring a smile to the face.
however, there is poorly-written monsterporn.
this is one of them.
here is the first paragraph. simple, declarative sentences that sound as though they were written by a robot. (and not a sexxy robot, either.)
Jenny had never been in love and little did she know that soon she would become extremely infatuated with her soul mate. She enjoyed her night out at a party where she met an attractive man named Matt. He mentioned that he was a scientist, trying to impress her. His hair was dark and clean cut. He wore slacks, a button up shirt, and tie. She enjoyed the compliments he provided throughout the evening. He had been known around town to be a sweet talker. Jenny had long blonde hair and wore a skimpy bikini that accentuated her boobs and ass. She was voluptuous in all the right places. They flirted with each other and built up sexual tension throughout the night. She giggled as they left the party early to go to his place for a drink.
the compliments he provided?? this is as bloodless and unerotic as a jane austen novel.
and only in monsterporn will you find a woman wearing a bikini on her night out to a party.
and only in monsterporn will you find a man with muscular stomach muscles.
okay - jumping ahead past where jenny and matt have sex and warm cum saturated her pallet (because she's a warehouse??), to where matt gets called in to the lab to help out with a project, where despite his muscular stomach muscles, he is NOT a scientist, but an "intern," and a doofy one at that.
Lately he had been helping out with a laser blaster experiment. His job was mainly to set things up so they could blast them. They let him shoot the blaster once and it was a highlight of the job for him.
i don't think this author knows what science is for.
this is a strange laboratory. there seem to be no proper scientists here. i mean, there is margaret, who is the scientist in charge of all the projects at the lab, which seems suspect, but maybe it's a small lab. but she's never referred to as "dr.", instead we get: The scientist Margaret was holding a clipboard.
and these are the kinds of experiments this lab performs:
Meanwhile at the lab, a naked young woman subject was being prepared for a sexual experiment. She had no idea that they would be testing the erogenous zones of her body and monitoring her mind. They were also monitoring something she was unaware of behind the wall.
"sexual" experiments. whose subjects just blithely strip down naked with "no idea" what is actually being measured or tested. are there no waivers???
so, in this instance, the sexual experiment involves a monster, who once again is described in the most basic sentences without context or even description, really.
Behind the door was a tentacle monster being held in captivity for experiments due to its attraction to sexual energy.
period.
however, we do learn that the tentacles are covered in suckers, and also a gelatinous slime like liquid that smelled like vanilla extract
which will have to do, in terms of details.
so - skimming, skimming - matt accidentally lets the tentacle monster escape, there is a scuffle, a single tentacle is axed off of the creature and escapes into the night. exeunt, pursued by scientists.
the scientist margaret coaches her fellow scientists outside that The tentacles are attracted to sexual vibrations, so while you are searching for the tentacle, I would suggest you fondle your genitals to give yourself the advantage.
however, she cautions them that if the tentacle does become attracted to them, it will lock itself into one of their sexual orifices. see, i hear that, and the last thing i am going to do is go diddling myself out on the streets. let someone else capture the creature. also - how do her fellow scientists not know that the creature is drawn to sexual vibrations? are there no morning meetings?? does no one know what they are doing in this lab??? shame on you, science!
matt is left to his own devices in the lab, and he gets bored. so his mind goes to jenny, his three-hour sexual acquaintance, who doesn't seem to mind that she was just straight-up dismissed from his apartment while he drove away to the lab, and when he texts her "Hey, babe, bring me something, I'm hungry," she texts him a photo of her vagina. She just happened to be in the area, so she agreed to stop by.
and is she still wearing only her tiny bikini?? you bet your sweet tentacle she is!
they pick up where they left off, rubbing and feeling on each other and she licked her lips and her mouth was slippery due to the excess of lip gloss she put on earlier. what is with these sentences???
and so of course their sexual vibrations bring tentacles from all corners of the lab, and one finds jenny and she utters the title of this book. and then more and more and more and more tentacles join the party, using matt and jenny both as sexual slankets. but it's okay - everyone's having a good time. a boringly described good time:
They couldn't help themselves due to the pleasure unlike anything they had ever felt. It was like a thousand orgasms at once. They gave into absolute pleasure. They cried out each time they had the feeling, because it was so overwhelming they could not contain themselves.
and then… other things happen, clearing the path for a sequel. many many sequels.
i mean, this is free monsterporn, so come and get it, but it is empirically weak.
because, science.
come to my blog!
there is no such thing as "good" monsterporn or "bad" monsterporn. just like there is no such thing as a "good" rainbow or a "bad" rainbow. the existence of monsterporn is something to celebrate because it's a little slice of unexpected joy that exists simply to bring a smile to the face.
however, there is poorly-written monsterporn.
this is one of them.
here is the first paragraph. simple, declarative sentences that sound as though they were written by a robot. (and not a sexxy robot, either.)
Jenny had never been in love and little did she know that soon she would become extremely infatuated with her soul mate. She enjoyed her night out at a party where she met an attractive man named Matt. He mentioned that he was a scientist, trying to impress her. His hair was dark and clean cut. He wore slacks, a button up shirt, and tie. She enjoyed the compliments he provided throughout the evening. He had been known around town to be a sweet talker. Jenny had long blonde hair and wore a skimpy bikini that accentuated her boobs and ass. She was voluptuous in all the right places. They flirted with each other and built up sexual tension throughout the night. She giggled as they left the party early to go to his place for a drink.
the compliments he provided?? this is as bloodless and unerotic as a jane austen novel.
and only in monsterporn will you find a woman wearing a bikini on her night out to a party.
and only in monsterporn will you find a man with muscular stomach muscles.
okay - jumping ahead past where jenny and matt have sex and warm cum saturated her pallet (because she's a warehouse??), to where matt gets called in to the lab to help out with a project, where despite his muscular stomach muscles, he is NOT a scientist, but an "intern," and a doofy one at that.
Lately he had been helping out with a laser blaster experiment. His job was mainly to set things up so they could blast them. They let him shoot the blaster once and it was a highlight of the job for him.
i don't think this author knows what science is for.
this is a strange laboratory. there seem to be no proper scientists here. i mean, there is margaret, who is the scientist in charge of all the projects at the lab, which seems suspect, but maybe it's a small lab. but she's never referred to as "dr.", instead we get: The scientist Margaret was holding a clipboard.
and these are the kinds of experiments this lab performs:
Meanwhile at the lab, a naked young woman subject was being prepared for a sexual experiment. She had no idea that they would be testing the erogenous zones of her body and monitoring her mind. They were also monitoring something she was unaware of behind the wall.
"sexual" experiments. whose subjects just blithely strip down naked with "no idea" what is actually being measured or tested. are there no waivers???
so, in this instance, the sexual experiment involves a monster, who once again is described in the most basic sentences without context or even description, really.
Behind the door was a tentacle monster being held in captivity for experiments due to its attraction to sexual energy.
period.
however, we do learn that the tentacles are covered in suckers, and also a gelatinous slime like liquid that smelled like vanilla extract
which will have to do, in terms of details.
so - skimming, skimming - matt accidentally lets the tentacle monster escape, there is a scuffle, a single tentacle is axed off of the creature and escapes into the night. exeunt, pursued by scientists.
the scientist margaret coaches her fellow scientists outside that The tentacles are attracted to sexual vibrations, so while you are searching for the tentacle, I would suggest you fondle your genitals to give yourself the advantage.
however, she cautions them that if the tentacle does become attracted to them, it will lock itself into one of their sexual orifices. see, i hear that, and the last thing i am going to do is go diddling myself out on the streets. let someone else capture the creature. also - how do her fellow scientists not know that the creature is drawn to sexual vibrations? are there no morning meetings?? does no one know what they are doing in this lab??? shame on you, science!
matt is left to his own devices in the lab, and he gets bored. so his mind goes to jenny, his three-hour sexual acquaintance, who doesn't seem to mind that she was just straight-up dismissed from his apartment while he drove away to the lab, and when he texts her "Hey, babe, bring me something, I'm hungry," she texts him a photo of her vagina. She just happened to be in the area, so she agreed to stop by.
and is she still wearing only her tiny bikini?? you bet your sweet tentacle she is!
they pick up where they left off, rubbing and feeling on each other and she licked her lips and her mouth was slippery due to the excess of lip gloss she put on earlier. what is with these sentences???
and so of course their sexual vibrations bring tentacles from all corners of the lab, and one finds jenny and she utters the title of this book. and then more and more and more and more tentacles join the party, using matt and jenny both as sexual slankets. but it's okay - everyone's having a good time. a boringly described good time:
They couldn't help themselves due to the pleasure unlike anything they had ever felt. It was like a thousand orgasms at once. They gave into absolute pleasure. They cried out each time they had the feeling, because it was so overwhelming they could not contain themselves.
and then… other things happen, clearing the path for a sequel. many many sequels.
i mean, this is free monsterporn, so come and get it, but it is empirically weak.
because, science.
come to my blog!
nope
September 21, 2023Don’t you hate it when that happens?
Happy Weird Wednesday!
Happy Weird Wednesday!
October 4, 2019
Well for my first Halloween read of the year this book sucked. Literally and figuratively. It's about Matt. Matt's stupid. Matt works at a lab with a sex monster. The sex monster has tentacles and they suck sexual pleasure. Matt the stupid one hits the button letting said sex monster free. A fight happens trying to catch the freed monster and a tentacle gets cut off and escapes. Getting a tentacle cut off won't kill said monster or the tentacle. The tentacle will just find a sex hole make itself at home til it grows into its own sex monster. While everyone else is out trying to find the lost tentacle, Matt the stupid one is charged to stay at the lab. OMG who's great idea was that. So then Matt again lets the monster out. Now he is stupid and doesn't notice. Bored he calls his gf over to fuck in the cool lab he works at. The monster is drawn to them and puts a Tentacle in each their butts. Giving them pleasure until they are drained dry. The monster wanted more so he is fixin to bounce. Matt trying to stop him get an ax and chops all his tentacles off. That pisses the monster off and Matt kills the monster with a laser. Then all the tentacles escape. The End........ I don't expect much of these silly books, but this was just sad. The book read like a 5 year old wrote it. Lame. I hope my next Halloween read is better.
August 25, 2014
A naive 20 year old girl named Jenny encounters a poorly-described tentacle monster who wants to penetrate her orifices.
I'm not a monster porn aficionado by any means. This is only the third or fourth one I've read. However, either I've been fortunate thus far and have only encountered some of the better written monsterotica or this one is just bad, even by monster porn standards. Maybe the fault is mine. Maybe I'm expecting too much from free monster porn. I can't deny that the writing is sub-par and the story is weak, even with my limited monster porn experience.
The writing bothers me even more than the implausible things like a woman wearing a bikini to a lab and people having sex while there's a monster on the loose. It reads like a 14 year old boy whose only exposure to sex has been internet porn and Penthouse Forum wrote it.
It's no wonder people use pseudonyms when they churn these things out. Imagine the conversations with co-workers would go.
"Hey, Bill, I heard you put out a story on the kindle. What's it about?"
"Well, there's some scientists experimenting on this tentacle creature..."
"Cool. Does it escape the lab and go on a rampage?"
"No, mostly it just fucks people."
"Oh. Look at the time! I think I have a meeting to go to..."
1.5 stars. I think my monster porn days are done. Unless someone finds a free one with a robot or some sort of shark creature in it.
I'm not a monster porn aficionado by any means. This is only the third or fourth one I've read. However, either I've been fortunate thus far and have only encountered some of the better written monsterotica or this one is just bad, even by monster porn standards. Maybe the fault is mine. Maybe I'm expecting too much from free monster porn. I can't deny that the writing is sub-par and the story is weak, even with my limited monster porn experience.
The writing bothers me even more than the implausible things like a woman wearing a bikini to a lab and people having sex while there's a monster on the loose. It reads like a 14 year old boy whose only exposure to sex has been internet porn and Penthouse Forum wrote it.
It's no wonder people use pseudonyms when they churn these things out. Imagine the conversations with co-workers would go.
"Hey, Bill, I heard you put out a story on the kindle. What's it about?"
"Well, there's some scientists experimenting on this tentacle creature..."
"Cool. Does it escape the lab and go on a rampage?"
"No, mostly it just fucks people."
"Oh. Look at the time! I think I have a meeting to go to..."
1.5 stars. I think my monster porn days are done. Unless someone finds a free one with a robot or some sort of shark creature in it.
October 31, 2015
The Halloween Monster Sex Bonanza continues
with: I've Fallen and there's a Tentacle in my Butt
What's Really Awkward is how elementary this book was. I remember learning to read in first grade and the sentences were very simple: See Dick run, See Jane walk, etc. Well this book was That elementary, with simple sentences or run on sentences. With lines like, She began to moan, reached down, put her hand over her pussy, and massaged what she thought was Matt, but was in fact a tentacle.
Really? That sentence had four commas and that's about three too many if you ask me.
Or this one... Jenny immediately fell to the floor and felt a sharp pain in her ass. One of the tentacles had anchored itself into her anal cavity. Her eyes immediately dilated. She looked down and saw the tentacle embedded in her ass. More tentacles surrounded her. She screamed at the top of her lungs. This book was so painful to read, that I can not devote any more time to reviewing it. I have nothing more to say!
This is the first 1 Star Monster Sex Book I have read this month and I can only pray that there are no more. If I could, I would erase this book from my brain, because that space is forever wasted!!
My friend Karen went into far more detail than this book deserves. And she highlighted every stupid line that drove me up the wall. If I could, I would copy and paste her review here. But a link is the next best thing. Check out Karen's review
The Halloween Monster Sex Party continues with Branded Nothing like a little Demon Erotica to spice things up!!
2014 Halloween Monster Sex Gangbang reviews: Check them out!!
Ghouls Just Wanna Have Fun
Bred by the Snow Beast
The Ravishing of Beauty
I Fucked Frankenstein's Monster
Abducted by the Alien Beast
Menage of the Werewolves
I've Fallen and there's a Tentacle in my Butt
Branded
with: I've Fallen and there's a Tentacle in my Butt
What's Really Awkward is how elementary this book was. I remember learning to read in first grade and the sentences were very simple: See Dick run, See Jane walk, etc. Well this book was That elementary, with simple sentences or run on sentences. With lines like, She began to moan, reached down, put her hand over her pussy, and massaged what she thought was Matt, but was in fact a tentacle.
Really? That sentence had four commas and that's about three too many if you ask me.
Or this one... Jenny immediately fell to the floor and felt a sharp pain in her ass. One of the tentacles had anchored itself into her anal cavity. Her eyes immediately dilated. She looked down and saw the tentacle embedded in her ass. More tentacles surrounded her. She screamed at the top of her lungs. This book was so painful to read, that I can not devote any more time to reviewing it. I have nothing more to say!
This is the first 1 Star Monster Sex Book I have read this month and I can only pray that there are no more. If I could, I would erase this book from my brain, because that space is forever wasted!!
My friend Karen went into far more detail than this book deserves. And she highlighted every stupid line that drove me up the wall. If I could, I would copy and paste her review here. But a link is the next best thing. Check out Karen's review
The Halloween Monster Sex Party continues with Branded Nothing like a little Demon Erotica to spice things up!!
2014 Halloween Monster Sex Gangbang reviews: Check them out!!
Ghouls Just Wanna Have Fun
Bred by the Snow Beast
The Ravishing of Beauty
I Fucked Frankenstein's Monster
Abducted by the Alien Beast
Menage of the Werewolves
I've Fallen and there's a Tentacle in my Butt
Branded
July 10, 2016
Reasons I should read this book -
1. That cover is proper classy.
2. It could actually happen, surely?
After reading -
"You may think it is funny now, but you won't if the tentacle enters one of your holes."
I'm slightly disappointed; I expected to get some useful life-saving tips from this book, just in case I ever come across someone accidently impaled on a tentacle. Sadly unless I find myself working or visiting a lab that has a tentacle monster captive, I won't be able to help anyone. But you may find it useful to remember -
"When you smell a sweet scent in the air and hear sucking and slurping, you had better cover your pie holes." - you know, in case there's ever a stray tentacle on the loose.
However! While I was browsing innocent websites I came across this helpful article titled HowTo:Avoid tentacle rape
July 11, 2014
I'm giving this an extra star just for the name of the book.
I mean, could I seriously turn this down?
It was FREE, for God's sake!
Ok. Beyond the awesome name, this didn't have much going for it.
And I can't believe I'm going to say this... but I've read better monsterotica.
I know, right? I never, no never, thought those words would come out of my mouth.
Unfortunately, this just wasn't a well-written story.
And, no. I don't mean the plot. I wasn't expecting anything other than some sort of a tentacle eventually making it's way into someone's butthole.
The writing was just kinda bad.
However.
I can't exactly say I regret reading this thing, either.
Big thanks to Dan for helping me feed my addiction!
I mean, could I seriously turn this down?
It was FREE, for God's sake!
Ok. Beyond the awesome name, this didn't have much going for it.
And I can't believe I'm going to say this... but I've read better monsterotica.
I know, right? I never, no never, thought those words would come out of my mouth.
Unfortunately, this just wasn't a well-written story.
And, no. I don't mean the plot. I wasn't expecting anything other than some sort of a tentacle eventually making it's way into someone's butthole.
The writing was just kinda bad.
However.
I can't exactly say I regret reading this thing, either.
Big thanks to Dan for helping me feed my addiction!
December 28, 2016
OMG the cover is so ridiculous it's funny! and the title haha! just NO!
January 15, 2020
Esta fue mi primera vez con el monsterporn.
Y debo decir que no me pareció la gran cosa, me hubiera gustado que describieran mejor al mounstruo y sus tentáculos. Ok eso sonó muy raro de parte mía.
El punto es que no me gusto, FIN
Y debo decir que no me pareció la gran cosa, me hubiera gustado que describieran mejor al mounstruo y sus tentáculos. Ok eso sonó muy raro de parte mía.
El punto es que no me gusto, FIN
dnf-for-now
July 29, 2014I read up to the point where Jenny utters the iconic line which, so astutely, provides the title to this piece of literary masterwork.
Mr. Naughty paints a vivid and heart-wrenching picture of a world in which cruel lab workers hold hostage an innocent tentacle monster for the purposes of scientific testing. The author's skillful prose allows you to sympathize with Tentacle Monster's plight of seeking out a specific kind of juice, all while being pursued by the evil Margaret, the dimwitted Matt, and the what's-her-purpose-besides-the-exploitation-of-her-orifices Jenny.
You'll root for all the disembodied, suction cup-ladened parts of Tentacle Monster as he fights to survive among the savagery of those who would keep from him what he needs the most.
Truly a tale for the ages. ; )
But seriously, this was free and made me chuckle after a bad day. However, I can't say I will be making any return trips to to the wackadoodle genre of monsterporn.
Or will I?!?
*Dun Dun DUN!!!*
Mr. Naughty paints a vivid and heart-wrenching picture of a world in which cruel lab workers hold hostage an innocent tentacle monster for the purposes of scientific testing. The author's skillful prose allows you to sympathize with Tentacle Monster's plight of seeking out a specific kind of juice, all while being pursued by the evil Margaret, the dimwitted Matt, and the what's-her-purpose-besides-the-exploitation-of-her-orifices Jenny.
You'll root for all the disembodied, suction cup-ladened parts of Tentacle Monster as he fights to survive among the savagery of those who would keep from him what he needs the most.
Truly a tale for the ages. ; )
But seriously, this was free and made me chuckle after a bad day. However, I can't say I will be making any return trips to to the wackadoodle genre of monsterporn.
Or will I?!?
*Dun Dun DUN!!!*
October 7, 2019
Would "Roxy made me do it" work as an excuse for reading this?
What a well-written story (*snickering) about an intern named Matt who goes to a club and meets a "nice girl" named Jenny. Because she is such a good liberal girl, she attacks his man-sword as soon as they get in his apartment. Unfortunately for Jenny and her attempts to see how many licks it takes to get the center of Matt's tootsie roll pop, Matt is called into work at 1am. See the lab he works for was having difficult with their test subject--a green alien monster.
The green alien sex monster had escaped and was looking for humans to feed off their sexual energy. When Jenny proves that she is no Usain Bolt, the monster plugs into her so he can get her energy. Of course, she screams the title of our story. Matt comes to rescue her...but the monster ultimately escapes.
Beware as you fall down, lay down or go to the bathroom. If you smell a sweet vanilla smell, you may soon get plugged up but know this: The suction on the aliens tentacles will drive your pleasure to heights unlike anything you have ever experienced. With multiple appendages, the green alien can manipulate just about all our pleasure spots at the same time, guaranteeing an explosive climax.
Special Thank you to Roxy and my husband. This was so hard that I thought I had a tentacle in my butt. There are no words to sum up what I am feeling towards you two right now. But to quote Spartacus, the Bringer of Rain: "I will return the bitter favor!"
What a well-written story (*snickering) about an intern named Matt who goes to a club and meets a "nice girl" named Jenny. Because she is such a good liberal girl, she attacks his man-sword as soon as they get in his apartment. Unfortunately for Jenny and her attempts to see how many licks it takes to get the center of Matt's tootsie roll pop, Matt is called into work at 1am. See the lab he works for was having difficult with their test subject--a green alien monster.
The green alien sex monster had escaped and was looking for humans to feed off their sexual energy. When Jenny proves that she is no Usain Bolt, the monster plugs into her so he can get her energy. Of course, she screams the title of our story. Matt comes to rescue her...but the monster ultimately escapes.
Beware as you fall down, lay down or go to the bathroom. If you smell a sweet vanilla smell, you may soon get plugged up but know this: The suction on the aliens tentacles will drive your pleasure to heights unlike anything you have ever experienced. With multiple appendages, the green alien can manipulate just about all our pleasure spots at the same time, guaranteeing an explosive climax.
Special Thank you to Roxy and my husband. This was so hard that I thought I had a tentacle in my butt. There are no words to sum up what I am feeling towards you two right now. But to quote Spartacus, the Bringer of Rain: "I will return the bitter favor!"
January 23, 2018
Don't know what to think
It started out with a sexy date and then tentacles invading areas of the body. No thank you. A little weird for me.
It started out with a sexy date and then tentacles invading areas of the body. No thank you. A little weird for me.
May 7, 2022
I came for the title because only normal sane human would walk away from that title. I mean who doesn’t want to know the story about falling ass first onto a tentacle? No? Just me. Aaah well Monster porn lovers everywhere deserve better than this kindergarten dribble. This author forgot to use adjectives, verbs, transition words, and how to make fucken complete sentences. I’ve read many short stories that are sooo much better than this. Hell even fucken smexy Bigfoot series was less hot garbage then this was. My damn review was longer and more eloquently written than this whole shit show. Zero stars. Zero.
July 24, 2014
Nice title!
The name of the author is also spectacular!
Better than Dallas Sketchman, though!
Fortunately it was for free.
Nothing more to say...
DON'T CLICK HERE, IF YOU ARE OFFENDED EASILY!!!!!
P.S.: I think unicorns are stalking me... They show up, even when I'm googling for "tentacle sex"!
Creepy! Isn't it?
July 23, 2016
It is no secret I'm a tentacle lover. When this book was offered, I couldn't resist reading it. This book is a 2.5 star. It's amusing. It's lighthearted funny. This "monster" is a sex fiend. I liked the sex. The rest of the story was eh. The switching point of view was a bit annoying. My recommendation, stick to one point of view. Focus on the lovely tentacle sex. More sex! More tentacles doing depraved things to sexy little females would help. This book is for tentacle lovers.
December 11, 2014
Yes, that title was actually a quote from the book. Enough said.
huh...you really can find a MLP for just about anything.
huh...you really can find a MLP for just about anything.
May 7, 2015
This was just plain weird...where's Lisa? I hope she comes back. As far as the sexual-energy sucking, fog spewing, bubble gum smelling, asexually reproductive, slimy and slurping tentacle monster...I'm having trouble wrapping my head around that whole concept...it just seems a little abnormal, no?
June 29, 2014
If it's a parody, then it's five stars.
July 16, 2014
This is tentacle butt porn. I laughed but I'm still not even sure what I read.
March 12, 2018
1.5
*Book source ~ Free on Amazon
A tentacle monster, secret sexual experiments, and dumbass characters.
Where do I even start with this one? That title? The cover? Or the terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad writing? Trust me when I say it’s awful. Ugh. Though I should have been clued in by the blurb. When there are 8 sentences and 6 of them contain the word tentacle, I should have realized it wasn’t going to be a masterpiece of literary genius.
"Warm cum saturated her pallet..." Da fuque is this shit? See? Groan worthy and not in a good way.
The editing is horrible. The ping ponging POV is awful. The characters are TSTL. I wish they had been all devoured and the tentacle monster burped happily ever after. Even the sex scenes are blah, but at least it’s tentacle sex so there is that. But that’s about it. Nothing to see here. Move along before you fall like a stupid blonde in a horror movie and end up with a tentacle up your butt.
*Book source ~ Free on Amazon
A tentacle monster, secret sexual experiments, and dumbass characters.
Where do I even start with this one? That title? The cover? Or the terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad writing? Trust me when I say it’s awful. Ugh. Though I should have been clued in by the blurb. When there are 8 sentences and 6 of them contain the word tentacle, I should have realized it wasn’t going to be a masterpiece of literary genius.
"Warm cum saturated her pallet..." Da fuque is this shit? See? Groan worthy and not in a good way.
The editing is horrible. The ping ponging POV is awful. The characters are TSTL. I wish they had been all devoured and the tentacle monster burped happily ever after. Even the sex scenes are blah, but at least it’s tentacle sex so there is that. But that’s about it. Nothing to see here. Move along before you fall like a stupid blonde in a horror movie and end up with a tentacle up your butt.
June 19, 2014
So, 2 stars is generous and really only for the amusing title.
Wow did this thing suck (pun intended). If you have no literate friends willing to help you edit a very short story, then *please* hire someone. This reads like it's written by a 13 year old horn dog that failed English on multiple occasions.
Sorry, because this is a bit sexist, but this story is a fabulous example of why men shouldn't try to write erotica. There is simply nothing erotic or romancey about this other than the delusion that 2 strangers fall in love after a little fellatio & a battle with a tentacle monster.
Wow did this thing suck (pun intended). If you have no literate friends willing to help you edit a very short story, then *please* hire someone. This reads like it's written by a 13 year old horn dog that failed English on multiple occasions.
Sorry, because this is a bit sexist, but this story is a fabulous example of why men shouldn't try to write erotica. There is simply nothing erotic or romancey about this other than the delusion that 2 strangers fall in love after a little fellatio & a battle with a tentacle monster.
May 15, 2022
Good story idea, just not well executed.
The writing was poor, the sex scenes mediocre. Seemed the writer had several interesting ideas, just did not know how to organize them, or which thread they should develop.
Like I said the idea of a tentacle in a girls butt is a good one, so two stars for the concept, and for putting a tentacle in an orifice.
The writing was poor, the sex scenes mediocre. Seemed the writer had several interesting ideas, just did not know how to organize them, or which thread they should develop.
Like I said the idea of a tentacle in a girls butt is a good one, so two stars for the concept, and for putting a tentacle in an orifice.
May 27, 2014
Very short read and if your into a tentacle monster eating up your sexual energy then his is a story for you.
July 26, 2014
A good laugh is all.. The title alone is worth a good laugh..
August 30, 2014
Review for I’ve Fallen and there’s a Tentacle in my Butt by Edward Naughty.
I picked this book up because it was a freebie and I had just finished reading another tentacle smut book and enjoyed the ridiculousness of it. I’ve Fallen and there’s a Tentacle in my Butt by Edward Naughty is exactly like I expected it to be; a spoof of an erotic tale about tentacle monsters and sexual relations with humans.
Edward Naughty did take this type of story and spun it in an old school Sci-fi movie with a monster chasing the blonde bimbo who happened to be wearing a bikini for absolutely no reason at all, but set in the bad acting porn flick kind of way. It was a hilarious distraction from reality. The utter insanity that is the tentacle smut genre is perfect for a great laugh and maybe someone out there thinks ‘hmm that’s hot’. I’m not one of them that gets my jollies off on this kind of story, but if you’ve had a horrible day and just need a comic relief these are great shorts to completely flip your mood.
As a blogger I find it hard to seriously rate these kinds of books, they don’t fit into my normal criteria for star rankings… with that said I will throw 3 stars at this one for having laugh out loud moments. I look forward to trying some of Edward’s other titles and can’t wait to read the rest of his “I’ve Fallen and there is a Tentacle in my Butt” series. Happy reading!
Review by the Head Whore at Mommy’s a Book Whore.
I picked this book up because it was a freebie and I had just finished reading another tentacle smut book and enjoyed the ridiculousness of it. I’ve Fallen and there’s a Tentacle in my Butt by Edward Naughty is exactly like I expected it to be; a spoof of an erotic tale about tentacle monsters and sexual relations with humans.
Edward Naughty did take this type of story and spun it in an old school Sci-fi movie with a monster chasing the blonde bimbo who happened to be wearing a bikini for absolutely no reason at all, but set in the bad acting porn flick kind of way. It was a hilarious distraction from reality. The utter insanity that is the tentacle smut genre is perfect for a great laugh and maybe someone out there thinks ‘hmm that’s hot’. I’m not one of them that gets my jollies off on this kind of story, but if you’ve had a horrible day and just need a comic relief these are great shorts to completely flip your mood.
As a blogger I find it hard to seriously rate these kinds of books, they don’t fit into my normal criteria for star rankings… with that said I will throw 3 stars at this one for having laugh out loud moments. I look forward to trying some of Edward’s other titles and can’t wait to read the rest of his “I’ve Fallen and there is a Tentacle in my Butt” series. Happy reading!
Review by the Head Whore at Mommy’s a Book Whore.
October 19, 2019
It was wierd I didn't even get passed the first couple of pages. To be honest I saw this on a group and wanted to see if it was real.
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