Laughter, Tears and Braids: A father's journey through losing his wife to cancer

by Bruce Ham

Within six months, an aggressive cancer killed Lisa Ham, a Raleigh, North Carolina mom at the young age of 39. Her husband, Bruce, was left scrambling to pick up the pieces of their life, while maneuvering the world with a broken heart. The responsibilities of being a single father to his three active daughters were overwhelming. Bruce wrestled with his faith and questioned his ability to parent competently without Lisa by his side. But slowly, his wife’s tough spirit inspired Bruce to shape his new normal and to find inner peace and laughter again. Along his personal journey, he became his girls' confidante, while mastering hair dryers, shopping trips, tights and braids.

Genres: Memoir, Nonfiction

266 pages, Paperback

First published August 9, 2013

About the author

Born in Fayetteville, North Carolina, and the son of a preacher, Bruce Ham lives in Raleigh with his three girls and hamster. Graduating from North Carolina State University didn't stop him from pursuing his late wife Lisa, who attended the archrival, University of North Carolina-Chapel Hill. He is a consummate father, the Chief Development Officer at the YMCA of the Triangle Area, and he has a serious addiction to bow ties.

Reviews

[Courtney Mauzy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Bruce's wife, Lisa (Permar), died of cancer at age 39. This book reflects his emotional recounting of their love affair, losing battle with cancer, anger with God, and his struggles to regain his footing as a single dad with 3 daughters. Raw and insightful.

[Allyson · Rating 4 out of 5]

Heartbreaking and uplifting all at once. I cried, but also laughed throughout. It's obvious how much Bruce loved his wife and family. I also enjoyed the Fayetteville and Raleigh connections.

[Lou · Rating 3 out of 5]

Well done story of personal grief and moving through such a painful, personal, and poignant time. Would love the next chapter in this family's journey.

[Michelle · Rating 5 out of 5]

Just a word of warning this book will make you really take stock of your life. As you know I am an avid reader. I said yes to this book without knowing that it would be a tear jerker. Okay, I know it has tears in the title, but really I bawled all the way through the book Sometimes laughing through my tears.



Bruce Ham invites us into his most sacred journey. The journey of his life with his wife and then...with our her. Mr Ham opens the book by telling the reader that he wanted his daughters to know their mom. All the good, the bad and the human. What he ends up doing, at least for me, is making the reader so grateful for their live that they will go hug their 14 year old son for no reason.



Mr Ham takes us thought the falling in love, marrying and raising of kids that the and his wife share "before". We fall in love with his wife a little too. We laugh at their funny stories and then we feel our stomachs drop as we learn with him that she has cancer. We go through the treatments and the doctors and the little moments of hope and sunshine in between.

This is a beautifully written story of a family. I would definitely recommend this book...assuming you have plenty of hankies on hand.

[Pat Eells · Rating 5 out of 5]

A great read! I received an autographed copy of this book; thank you very much.

This is a heartbreaking memoir written by a wonderful man. You will find yourself crying and laughing. The love and compassion Bruce Ham has for his wife, who is dying of cancer, and their 3 girls, is almost too good to be true; but it is. Bruce is the kind of man every woman desires to be married to and the kind of father all children would be so fortunate to have. There were many wonderful memories he shares, but wonders if there will ever be any future happy ones. He tries to deal with his own confusing emotions while struggling to raise 3 daughters, knowing nothing about their needs, problems, questions, and activities as his wife always took care of them. Bruce questions "why" this happened, losing faith and feeling hopeless. I won't say anymore as I want you to read this "hard to put down" memoir.

[DAulan Collins · Rating 5 out of 5]

Bruce Ham, Laughter, Tears and Braids: A Father's Journey Through Losing his Wife to Cancer. The book captures the feelings and incite of families that are facing a terrible illness and learning how to face it. Especially a losing his wife and explaining all of this to the small children. How can understanding their family member is never coming. It was a warm, heart touching story that left me crying but not a cry of sadness but for a triumph of this family.

[Tricia · Rating 4 out of 5]

When a book can make me laugh and cry within minutes, it is a good one. This is written by a local dad/husband who I don't personally know, but I am sure the Raleigh connections added to my enjoyment of the book. He is very real about his grief and doubts and pain and doesn't spiritualize it all away. Very glad I read.

[Dkspleasant · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a book that will have you sobbing and laughing out loud at the very same time. A Well written account of the heartbreak of a young family as they lose their wife and mother to an aggressive cancer. An honest look at grief, faith and the strength needed to survive such a loss.

[kristen · Rating 3 out of 5]

Read tonight in the airport on a layover. Literally had to compose myself several times- may be the rawest book I've ever read.

[Jessica Carmen · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is written by my friend Sallie's brother-in-law, its about her sister Lisa. I found it you be very honest and insightful.

[Sudalu · Rating 5 out of 5]

Could not put this book down. Read it in 3 hours and laughed, cried and reread. Really puts your life in perspective. Mr Hamm puts himself out there. A must read