How to Grow a Friend

by Sara Gillingham

A lovely metaphor teaches valuable lessons in how to treat others and make friendships blossom! Making a friend takes patience, care, and room to bloom—just like growing a flower. Soon your little gardeners will have their very own green thumbs for this most important of life skills.

Genres: Picture Books, Friendship, Storytime, Childrens, Fiction, Gardening, Plants

40 pages, Hardcover

First published July 1, 2013

Reviews

[Misty · Rating 5 out of 5]

I'm pretty sure my 6 year old missed the metaphor that compares tending a friendship to tending a flower. One part especially confused him about a friend "drooping" but he enjoyed the story nonetheless!

[Emmaline MacBeath · Rating 4 out of 5]

SUMMARY: "To grow a friend, first plant a seed in good soil." This book parallels building a friendship with growing a plant. Both need plenty of time, care and love. And the best part of all is, "There is always room for one more."

ILLUSTRATIONS: The illustrations are very unique. They look like paper cutouts. They are colorful, creative, fun, and give a feeling of positive energy.

THE GOOD: There were many sweet moments in this story. I loved when the two friend shared an umbrella to stay dry and when one friend talked and the other one listened. This book is a very good example of the many things it takes to be a good friend. It uses how to take care of a plant as a metaphor. You water a plant, and you water a friend through play.
THE NOT AS GOOD: In some parts the metaphor is a bit deep for the younger children. For example: "And don't let your friend get stuck in the weeds." There is a picture of hands sticking up from the ground. Despite this, children will enjoy the story of friendship.

AGE RECOMMENDATION: Ages 3-7

[Jillian · Rating 4 out of 5]

The gardening metaphor carries throughout with advice for having, keeping, and growing a friendship together with bright illustrations that I think younger kids will enjoy. And even some of my older kids could use a reminder of the messages.

[Janette Mcmahon · Rating 4 out of 5]

A lovely picture book paralleling friendship and gardening. Illustrations are large and simple and words are few. Highly recommend as a spring read.

[Jennifer · Rating 3 out of 5]

Friendship tips written like gardening advice. I'm not sure small people would understand the metaphor.

[Lori · Rating 4 out of 5]

A great book for young readers (and listeners) on what it means to cultivate friendships. I would love to see another book on the same topic aged up for lower elementary children. This is a tad baby-ish in its presentation for that age group, but the message is useful and eternal. The metaphorical presentation did cause some questions about how you could possibly water a friend. But I see nothing wrong in discussing metaphor with young children, they hear it daily in other contexts. The confusion also opened a space for discussing what it meant to be a friend. We questioned whether everyone in class or on the playground is really "your friend," as so many adults seem to insist to young ones.

[Jana · Rating 4 out of 5]

This sweet picture book compares developing a good friendship with planting a seed. Both plants and friends take attention, care, and effort. The bright, colorful illustrations show neighborhood children planting a seed together and sharing in the effort and pleasure of their resulting sprout. This would be a great book to share with young readers at the beginning of the school year, as classroom communities are being built and children are learning how to work together. Use this book as a mentor text to help kids write their own "how to" guides for working together.

[Kara · Rating 3 out of 5]

This unexpected take on the "How-To" story structure opens with a scene of individual children dotted across several yards and houses in a neighborhood. When we return to the same scene in the final pages, the children are gathered together on one wagon, and colorful flowers have blossomed across the yards. Gillingham uses an extended analogy between cultivating friendship and tending a garden to bring the young characters together.

[Andrea Brooks · Rating 4 out of 5]

While not about moving or starting a new school, those are times when children are most nervous about will they be able to make friends - which makes this a perfect fit for those times. Love how this book offers concrete advise that is not a pat 0f-course-you'll-make-new-friends but uses the planting metaphor to help a child feel reassured that they will make it happen, just not overnight, & not without their active participation.

[Panda Incognito · Rating 3 out of 5]

This picture book uses gardening metaphors to talk about friendship, but it is unlikely to work for the intended audience. The illustrations show very young children, and the sentences are simple and short, but the abstract thought and metaphor will go over young children's heads. This is mainly for parents to enjoy.

[Yesica Mendez-Sandoval]

This book talked about friendship in gardening terms; when it came to giving space and mentioning that it takes time to grow. It talks about how problems that might arise when growing a friend but then goes into helping them too. Though out the book the kids are seen growing and taking care/tending to the flowers.

[Vivian · Rating 3 out of 5]

With one line of text per page, stylized illustrations, and a neighborhood of many races, friendship is shown to be cultivated much like a garden. Little ones will love finding the hummingbird which appears on every page save one.

[Viviane Elbee · Rating 5 out of 5]

The adorable illustrations really make this book lovable. It’s a short, quick read, perfect for toddlers. But the garden - friendship metaphor will probably be better appreciated by older kids & adults.

Kids enjoyed it.

[Trisha Parsons · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is a little metaphorical for younger age groups, but it did provide a lot of opportunities for dialogic reading. I asked my kids what soil is, and we talked about the pictures of rain and shine.

[Christy · Rating 5 out of 5]

A lovely metaphor teaches valuable lessons in how to treat others and make friendships blossom! Making a friend takes patience, care, and room to bloom—just like growing a flower. Soon your little gardeners will have their very own green thumbs for this most important of life skills.

[Pug · Rating 3 out of 5]

Nothing too thrilling in here, but it's not a bad little story, comparing growing flowers to nurturing your friends. With unique, colorful, abstract illustrations which capture the eye. A good life lesson, on both counts.

[Kimberly]

1 sentence per page. Bright colorful simple illustrations that fill the whole page. A story of how to care for friends (listening, talking, including others, if a friend is drooping give them something sweet, etc.).

[Phobean · Rating 3 out of 5]

Sweet, light, and charming. Will it teach friendship skills? Possibly. Will it prompt children to smile, definitely.

[Kelly · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very sweet and simple explanation of what it takes to grow and nurture a friendship. Easy for children to understand.

[Annie Young · Rating 5 out of 5]

So sweet. Great book for teaching friendship and the art is great!

[Engel Dreizehn · Rating 4 out of 5]

Liken the collage style/cut paste-esque illustrations like paralleling the notion that making new friends is like growing a garden.

[Laura Daniel · Rating 5 out of 5]

One of the cutest books I have ever read! Will definitely be reading this one to my future students.

[JosiePosy3 · Rating 5 out of 5]

I liked that that they thought about planting a friend. At the end they say that there is always room for one more friend. It is a fun book. You can make a friend whenever you want.

[Sandy · Rating 4 out of 5]

We've been reading a lot of books on gardening this summer. This came up on a list and I love the metaphor between growing a plant and a friendship.

[Sarah Jewett · Rating 3 out of 5]

My son comes back to this book often.

Very colorful.

[Lan]

Just precious. Simple story with lovely art that’s looks simple but is layered with colors and textures. Love the message and how growing a friend and plant are so similar.

[Craig Schorling · Rating 3 out of 5]

A cute but simple book about making friends. It had some good reminders for my younger son but a little too simple for my older daughter.

[Catalina · Rating 3 out of 5]

Cute.

[KaitandMaddie · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was sweet, but the girls weren’t all that into the plant-friend connection. It was good for talking about emotions.

[Alana · Rating 5 out of 5]

Celebration of the wonderful and hard things about having, and being, a friend.