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What I've Learned... So Far Part III: Banjos, Boats & Butt Dialing
Banjos, Boats and Butt Dialing is the third installment in Mike Ball's What I've Learned... So Far series of books. In it the Erma Bombeck Award-winning humorist grapples with topics ranging from becoming a grandfather, to rabbit hunting, to the Zen of a middle-aged guy trying to cope with cleavage. The book is a compilation of 74 entries from Mike's nationally-syndicated column, What I've Learned... So Far. His homespun wit, sharp sense of humor, and ability to connect with readers on an emotional level have been compared to Mark Twain, Erma Bombeck, Robert Benchley, and Ernie Pyle.
- GenresHumor
307 pages, Paperback
First published March 20, 2013
7 people are currently reading
247 people want to read
About the author
Mike Ball
12 books7 followersMike Ball is an award-winning humorist who writes the internationally popular weekly syndicated column "What I've Learned So Far..." He lives and writes on the shores of Whitmore Lake, Michigan, sharing a roof with his wife and a psychotic Siamese cat. He is a member of the National Society of Newspaper Columnists, the recipient of the 2003 Erma Bombeck Award, and a finalist for the 2011 Robert Benchley Award.
Mike's first book, "Bikes, Docks & Slush Nuggets," is Part I of the "What I've Learned... So Far" trilogy. Part II, "Angels, Chimps & Tater Mitts," was published in April, 2012.
In addition to cranking out his humor column and books, Mike is a musician. As front man for the band Dr. Mike & The Sea Monkeys, he plays guitar, banjo, ukulele, djembe, slide guitar, and F# Shaker Egg. The band has been described as John Prine meets Jimmy Buffet, and features songs based on Mike's columns and books, such as, "At Least I've Got Most Of My Hair," "Carlson the Pissed Off Angel," and "The Colonoscopy Song."
Mike is also the founder of Lost Voices, a Michigan non-profit group that takes therapeutic roots music writing and performing programs to incarcerated and at-risk youth. For this work he was awarded the Kindness Community Hero Award from USA Today.
Mike's first book, "Bikes, Docks & Slush Nuggets," is Part I of the "What I've Learned... So Far" trilogy. Part II, "Angels, Chimps & Tater Mitts," was published in April, 2012.
In addition to cranking out his humor column and books, Mike is a musician. As front man for the band Dr. Mike & The Sea Monkeys, he plays guitar, banjo, ukulele, djembe, slide guitar, and F# Shaker Egg. The band has been described as John Prine meets Jimmy Buffet, and features songs based on Mike's columns and books, such as, "At Least I've Got Most Of My Hair," "Carlson the Pissed Off Angel," and "The Colonoscopy Song."
Mike is also the founder of Lost Voices, a Michigan non-profit group that takes therapeutic roots music writing and performing programs to incarcerated and at-risk youth. For this work he was awarded the Kindness Community Hero Award from USA Today.
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Displaying 1 - 14 of 14 reviews
February 6, 2017
Disclaimer: I received this book free through Goodreads-Firstreads in exchange for an honest review.
Witty and amusing collection of essays that made me laugh out loud throughout this book.
Witty and amusing collection of essays that made me laugh out loud throughout this book.
May 3, 2013
The author describes this third book in his What I’ve Learned So Far series as “a fairly random collection of a bunch of the interesting things that have come my way…” But it’s not entirely random. Seasons pass. The boat dock rises and falls and gets put together again. And the reader finds a new friend in the author—a voluble friend with a fun sense of humor, a real care and concern for people, and a pleasingly, reverently irreverent approach to faith and politics.
“Hi. I’m Mike, and I’m a Facebookaholic,” he says in one essay where he ponders those strange games, odd requests and unknown friends of the new universe. But Mike Ball is no 60-something adult detached from the world of youth, as the verses from incarcerated teens in the Project Roots and Lost Voices programs so clearly show—“Feel like an angel with a broken wing,” says one. “Feel like a song no one can sing.” Mike Ball has a heart for the breaking and broken, and a way with words (and music) that invites healing power into their lives and into our hearts. Mostly you’ll laugh with the author as you real these essays, but sometimes you’ll just have to stop in awe instead and catch your breath.
The author’s fun outlook on life and its disasters keeps this book flowing on an even keel. Sports, festivals, technology, burgers and more all meet his pen. Cross Santa with Twilight, install Darth Vader in your kitchen, fire up the grill—in winter—and enjoy. Then try to figure out the philosophy of your overly smart Smartphone.
Disclosure: I was given a free copy of this book with a request for my honest review.
“Hi. I’m Mike, and I’m a Facebookaholic,” he says in one essay where he ponders those strange games, odd requests and unknown friends of the new universe. But Mike Ball is no 60-something adult detached from the world of youth, as the verses from incarcerated teens in the Project Roots and Lost Voices programs so clearly show—“Feel like an angel with a broken wing,” says one. “Feel like a song no one can sing.” Mike Ball has a heart for the breaking and broken, and a way with words (and music) that invites healing power into their lives and into our hearts. Mostly you’ll laugh with the author as you real these essays, but sometimes you’ll just have to stop in awe instead and catch your breath.
The author’s fun outlook on life and its disasters keeps this book flowing on an even keel. Sports, festivals, technology, burgers and more all meet his pen. Cross Santa with Twilight, install Darth Vader in your kitchen, fire up the grill—in winter—and enjoy. Then try to figure out the philosophy of your overly smart Smartphone.
Disclosure: I was given a free copy of this book with a request for my honest review.
April 13, 2013
Things that make you snicker when you notice them make you guffaw when you read them!
There are the little things that buzz past our eyes or ears or make sudden starts in our synapses that have the potential for generating a response - either positive or negative - but the bustle of living too often does not allow the time to play them out and soak in the experience. Mike Ball does that for us, and though this is this reviewer's first exposure to his humor it is easy to see that it will become an addiction!
Ball is able to succinctly crystallize moments of humor in a few pages - a very few pages - with a skill that leaves you not only amazed by his craft but either laughing to the point of tears or slam-dunk waking up to something you hadn't really registered. Some examples dial right into it: `In Which I Discover the Senior Menu at Denny's' includes the following excerpts - `The first thing I noticed about the stuff on the Wrinkle Ranch Roundup is that the portions are smaller. This is presumably because us Wrinkle Ranchers don't get all that hungry, now that we no longer move any faster than a glacier or Department of Motor Vehicles worker. On the other hand, it may just be that they figure we won't have the strength to carry a doggie bag out to the car.' And later on, same thought area, `The final blow came when a gray-haired man with a long gray beard hobbled up to our table leaning on a walker with bright yellow tennis balls on the ends of the legs. He stopped, turned on his hearing aid, adjusted the air flow from his oxygen bottle, and said, "How was that meal, old timer? In just a few more years, I'll be able to order Grandpa Grub myself." So many zingers in that one that they create their own orbit.
Or in `Darwin Rules', `So what exactly is it that would make you check for gas leaks with a match? Or engage in a little target practice with your rifle by firing at a propane tank? What exactly is the thought process that would lead a person to raise rattlesnakes for fun and profit? Did you really think it was a good idea to go rollerblading at the end of a ski rope tied to the bumper of your Buddy's Ford?' And when Ball turns on the vitriol he offers us such passages (in `A Requiem for Smokers') as, `And people could smoke just about anywhere they wanted to. Ok, they did discourage smoking in some nursery schools and most operating rooms, and it was considered impolite to actually light up in a crowded elevator, probably because the hair spray on the big-haired lady in front of us was as flammable as napalm. But other than that it was pretty much "smoke `em if you got 'em". And later along the same line, `These days smokers occupy a rung on the social ladder somewhere between lepers and skunk wranglers. You see them in the designated smoking areas outside office building, huddled in hazy little clusters, with their shoulders hunched against the weather and the stark disapproval of society.'
And those are quickies - read how he deals with pushup bras or other topics that lend themselves to humor and there you have it. Mike Ball is outrageously and joyously funny! You need to own this brain rest food book.
Grady Harp
There are the little things that buzz past our eyes or ears or make sudden starts in our synapses that have the potential for generating a response - either positive or negative - but the bustle of living too often does not allow the time to play them out and soak in the experience. Mike Ball does that for us, and though this is this reviewer's first exposure to his humor it is easy to see that it will become an addiction!
Ball is able to succinctly crystallize moments of humor in a few pages - a very few pages - with a skill that leaves you not only amazed by his craft but either laughing to the point of tears or slam-dunk waking up to something you hadn't really registered. Some examples dial right into it: `In Which I Discover the Senior Menu at Denny's' includes the following excerpts - `The first thing I noticed about the stuff on the Wrinkle Ranch Roundup is that the portions are smaller. This is presumably because us Wrinkle Ranchers don't get all that hungry, now that we no longer move any faster than a glacier or Department of Motor Vehicles worker. On the other hand, it may just be that they figure we won't have the strength to carry a doggie bag out to the car.' And later on, same thought area, `The final blow came when a gray-haired man with a long gray beard hobbled up to our table leaning on a walker with bright yellow tennis balls on the ends of the legs. He stopped, turned on his hearing aid, adjusted the air flow from his oxygen bottle, and said, "How was that meal, old timer? In just a few more years, I'll be able to order Grandpa Grub myself." So many zingers in that one that they create their own orbit.
Or in `Darwin Rules', `So what exactly is it that would make you check for gas leaks with a match? Or engage in a little target practice with your rifle by firing at a propane tank? What exactly is the thought process that would lead a person to raise rattlesnakes for fun and profit? Did you really think it was a good idea to go rollerblading at the end of a ski rope tied to the bumper of your Buddy's Ford?' And when Ball turns on the vitriol he offers us such passages (in `A Requiem for Smokers') as, `And people could smoke just about anywhere they wanted to. Ok, they did discourage smoking in some nursery schools and most operating rooms, and it was considered impolite to actually light up in a crowded elevator, probably because the hair spray on the big-haired lady in front of us was as flammable as napalm. But other than that it was pretty much "smoke `em if you got 'em". And later along the same line, `These days smokers occupy a rung on the social ladder somewhere between lepers and skunk wranglers. You see them in the designated smoking areas outside office building, huddled in hazy little clusters, with their shoulders hunched against the weather and the stark disapproval of society.'
And those are quickies - read how he deals with pushup bras or other topics that lend themselves to humor and there you have it. Mike Ball is outrageously and joyously funny! You need to own this brain rest food book.
Grady Harp
July 9, 2013
Mike Ball takes us on a delightful tour through the seasons with wit, with insight, with humor, and even with a bit of philosophy.
Most of the time so many of us are so busy with the big things of life, the children, the parents, the nine to five, taxes, insurance policies to keep track of, utility bills to pay, and the myriad challenges of home ownership that we are so tired that we cannot find the humor, the joy, the amusement in the every day things of our lives.
This author ponders our resolutions for the new year - all those promises we make about weight loss, fixing this or that, or cleaning out the junk drawer that has been jammed shut since last year. Anyone who has ever lived near water will absolutely enjoy his, his elderly neighbor, Ralph's, and his son's time spent with fixing up the dock after the winter's freezes and thaws. Where is it written that a dock must be straight? Certainly not in the annals of the not professional homeowner dock repair person! It is a joy to read of a man finding humor in his dock that has dreams of becoming a roller coaster!
After all, it is said that Ray Bradbury got the idea for his story, Fog Horn, from a broken piece of roller coaster on the beach. If a roller coaster part can grow up to be a monster, why can't a dock grow up to be something like a winding roller coaster?
We do have to laugh at ourselves: our talents, and our 'gee, I really wish I knew what I was doing' moments.
So it is a joy to join him on his pontoon boat; replacing his dishwasher - now how hard could that be? Never did a dishwasher replacement, but we did have the new stove that was about a sixteenth of an inch too wide for the space. No, Katie Scarlet's corset didn't help, but Mike matches us attempt for attempt to conquer such an "easy" task!
An essential part of Mike's work kit seems to be beer, perhaps it role to take the edge off difficulties, or is it just to make jobs more palatable?
Not only a writer, but also a musician, Mike reaches out to young people to help them find their words, their music, their paths.
For the gentlemen he offers a mini-course in how to look at a woman, and appreciate her beauty, without staring open mouthed beneath her chin.
For we seniors, Mike addresses the joy of grandchildren, as well as looking back at when our children were small.
There is something for everyone in this gem of life's moments; moments to be treasured, remembered, and shared. Reading any one of Mike's stories will take you on your own trip down memory lane - a road we should appreciate as each step on it has made us who were are.
Most of the time so many of us are so busy with the big things of life, the children, the parents, the nine to five, taxes, insurance policies to keep track of, utility bills to pay, and the myriad challenges of home ownership that we are so tired that we cannot find the humor, the joy, the amusement in the every day things of our lives.
This author ponders our resolutions for the new year - all those promises we make about weight loss, fixing this or that, or cleaning out the junk drawer that has been jammed shut since last year. Anyone who has ever lived near water will absolutely enjoy his, his elderly neighbor, Ralph's, and his son's time spent with fixing up the dock after the winter's freezes and thaws. Where is it written that a dock must be straight? Certainly not in the annals of the not professional homeowner dock repair person! It is a joy to read of a man finding humor in his dock that has dreams of becoming a roller coaster!
After all, it is said that Ray Bradbury got the idea for his story, Fog Horn, from a broken piece of roller coaster on the beach. If a roller coaster part can grow up to be a monster, why can't a dock grow up to be something like a winding roller coaster?
We do have to laugh at ourselves: our talents, and our 'gee, I really wish I knew what I was doing' moments.
So it is a joy to join him on his pontoon boat; replacing his dishwasher - now how hard could that be? Never did a dishwasher replacement, but we did have the new stove that was about a sixteenth of an inch too wide for the space. No, Katie Scarlet's corset didn't help, but Mike matches us attempt for attempt to conquer such an "easy" task!
An essential part of Mike's work kit seems to be beer, perhaps it role to take the edge off difficulties, or is it just to make jobs more palatable?
Not only a writer, but also a musician, Mike reaches out to young people to help them find their words, their music, their paths.
For the gentlemen he offers a mini-course in how to look at a woman, and appreciate her beauty, without staring open mouthed beneath her chin.
For we seniors, Mike addresses the joy of grandchildren, as well as looking back at when our children were small.
There is something for everyone in this gem of life's moments; moments to be treasured, remembered, and shared. Reading any one of Mike's stories will take you on your own trip down memory lane - a road we should appreciate as each step on it has made us who were are.
July 5, 2013
This is a laugh out loud funny kind of book. Don't think that just because it was written by a guy, it is limited to a male audience. My husband and I read it together aloud- which made it even funnier as we tried to get through some of the stories we were reading to each other.
I really love the fact that Mike isn't afraid to make fun of himself. He does a great job at articulating some of the issues that many people face, but all in a humerus way. This book has a little bit of something for everyone. One of my favorites was the dock story. It just made me giggle and smile as I pictured it all in head.
Not all books that set out to be funny while telling a story actually succeed. In fact, a lot of them, suck. It's an unfortunate truth. Not everyone is as funny as they think they are! But Mike Ball really is funny. I imagine him as the kind of guy that would fit perfect into any crowd and be the life of the party as he found the right story for the situation- especially if something awkward happened.
I highly recommend this book for those that need a laugh, but also enjoy connecting with another human being through stories you might actually relate to. It's a very enjoyable read!
I really love the fact that Mike isn't afraid to make fun of himself. He does a great job at articulating some of the issues that many people face, but all in a humerus way. This book has a little bit of something for everyone. One of my favorites was the dock story. It just made me giggle and smile as I pictured it all in head.
Not all books that set out to be funny while telling a story actually succeed. In fact, a lot of them, suck. It's an unfortunate truth. Not everyone is as funny as they think they are! But Mike Ball really is funny. I imagine him as the kind of guy that would fit perfect into any crowd and be the life of the party as he found the right story for the situation- especially if something awkward happened.
I highly recommend this book for those that need a laugh, but also enjoy connecting with another human being through stories you might actually relate to. It's a very enjoyable read!
January 13, 2014
Laugh out loud funny
Okay, I don't agree with author Ball's political views but I did enjoy most of "What I've Learned So Far: Banjos, Boats and Butt Dialing." Ball is a popular weekly columnist and I can see why. Many of the columns included in this book are hilarious. And some are introspective.
I especially liked the "It's Christmas Eve! Is This Your Chafing Dish?" column. It reminded me of my own family Christmases. And that's a major reason that I like the book - I can identify with a good portion of it. The author and I are close in age, I believe, and much of what he writes about rings true. "In Which I Discover the Senior Menu at Denny's" is a good example for that.
I recommend this to older readers (say over 40) that want a good chuckle and are Democrats and Obama supporters - or are willing to read the book anyway.
NOTE: I received a copy of this book in exchange for my honest review.
Okay, I don't agree with author Ball's political views but I did enjoy most of "What I've Learned So Far: Banjos, Boats and Butt Dialing." Ball is a popular weekly columnist and I can see why. Many of the columns included in this book are hilarious. And some are introspective.
I especially liked the "It's Christmas Eve! Is This Your Chafing Dish?" column. It reminded me of my own family Christmases. And that's a major reason that I like the book - I can identify with a good portion of it. The author and I are close in age, I believe, and much of what he writes about rings true. "In Which I Discover the Senior Menu at Denny's" is a good example for that.
I recommend this to older readers (say over 40) that want a good chuckle and are Democrats and Obama supporters - or are willing to read the book anyway.
NOTE: I received a copy of this book in exchange for my honest review.
September 11, 2013
Hott Review:
What I liked: This was laugh out loud funny. The articles were short fun and told in such a way that I had tears running down my face at times. Don’t miss this read! They’re perfect examples of why you shouldn’t take life to seriously.
What I didn’t like: These weren’t always articles that I enjoyed (yes, I’m a bit of a prude) but they’re well written & I’ll bet hubby would love them!
More…
Source: Author & Kindle FreeRead
Grade: B
Steam: Adult
Series: What I’ve Learned… So Far, 3
What I liked: This was laugh out loud funny. The articles were short fun and told in such a way that I had tears running down my face at times. Don’t miss this read! They’re perfect examples of why you shouldn’t take life to seriously.
What I didn’t like: These weren’t always articles that I enjoyed (yes, I’m a bit of a prude) but they’re well written & I’ll bet hubby would love them!
More…
Source: Author & Kindle FreeRead
Grade: B
Steam: Adult
Series: What I’ve Learned… So Far, 3
May 30, 2013
I won this book as part of a first reads contest so I didn't know what to expect. I'm so glad I won it! This book had me laughing out loud. I enjoy reading advice columns because they usually bring a smile to my face at the beginning of my day. This book reminds me of those columns. It's a great book for a coffee table because it doesn't have to be read all at once. You can come back to it again and again, reading different sections each time, without losing anything. I would highly recommend this book for adding humor & good times into your life.
June 22, 2014
I received the book for free through Goodreads First Reads. This book was funny, and a delightful read. I liked how each SHORT chapter was on a different subject, and you could stop and not lose your place like in a novel. I would like to meet this man, and hear him and my husband go at it...they would probably have me laughing for hours. This is a good book, and now I'm going to have to look up his other ones. Recommending!
July 10, 2013
This is a delightful book and I'm glad I purchased it. It is full of insights and witticisms about daily life and things that we all struggle with, little embarrassments, neurotic thoughts, dealing with people, etc. It also deals with the more difficult things we all deal with in this life. In a funny way it shows how they are all somehow related. I'm very glad I bought this book, and consider it a vital self-help book, and I recommend it to anyone who needs an emotional face-lift.
July 2, 2013
I won this book through First Reads (thanks for the book, Mike!). This was an entertaining, easy read and you can tell the author is a nice, fun guy (touching stories about his son, his neighbor Harold) with a great attitude!
December 12, 2016
The short columns were sometimes funny, touching and enjoyable, but nothing overly wow about them. If I wasn't born and raised in Michigan, I probably wouldn't have liked or connected with this book at all.
May 13, 2014
This book is full of short quips that are mildly interesting, but, overall, I didn't find them funny.
January 11, 2016
I won this through goodreads first reads. It was cute. Not great. Not really my kind of book.
Displaying 1 - 14 of 14 reviews