I Ain't Me No More

Always Divas #1

by E.N. Joy

Helen, the devious vixen of New Day Temple of Faith, has fed off the pain of others for years, but the divas of the New Day want to try to save her.

Genres: Romance, Audiobook, Fiction

288 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2013

About the author

BLESSEDselling Author E. N. Joy is the writer behind the five book series, “New Day Divas,” the “Still Divas” three book series, the “Always Divas” three book series, and the "Forever Divas" three book series, all which have been coined “Soap Operas In Print.” Formerly writing secular works under the names Joylynn M. Jossel and JOY, this award winning author has been sharing her literary expertise on conference panels in her home town of Columbus, Ohio and cities across the country as well as instructing literary workshops.
Joy writes children’s and middle grade titles under the name N. Joy. Her children’s story, The Secret Olivia Told Me, received the American Library Association Coretta Scott King Honor. Book club rights were acquired by Scholastic Books and the book has sold almost 100,000 copies. Elementary and middle school children have fallen in love with reading and creative writing as a result of the readings and workshops Joy instructs in schools nationwide.
The former acquisitions editor for a decade for Urban Christian, an imprint of Urban Books in which the titles are distributed by Kensington Publishing Corporation, Joy is now a freelance editor. In addition, Joy is the artistic developer for a young girl group named DJHK Gurls. Joy pens original songs for the group that deal with messages that affect today’s youth, such as bullying.

Reviews

[Winter Sophia Rose · Rating 5 out of 5]

Moving, Gritty, Deep & Raw! An Exceptional Read! I Loved It!

[Desiree Watson · Rating 4 out of 5]

Helen has always felt like the black sheep of her family. When her friend hooks her up with Dub, she is so excited that someone sees past her dark skin that she doesn't realize her worth. Through the years with Dub, he beats her repeatedly, calls her names and cheats on her. She is so gullible that when he gives her an STD and tells her that he didn't get it from having sex, she believes him. She finally gets the courage to leave him when he goes to jail, only to get into another relationship with someone she doesn't really like. She doesn't think much of herself until she starts stripping. This is when she realizes that she really doesn't want to sell her soul for the $500 the man is offering her. She walks out of the strip club and eventually finds God. She realizes that through it all, God was waiting for her to find her way to him. Read: November 2013.

[Deirdre Davis · Rating 5 out of 5]

New Diva in the Circle

WOW.....Helen is one bold diva to roll up on the New Day ladies talking about her! That's how she starts her story! She shares some things that will having you shaking your head! Just when she thought she was at her lowest point God stepped in a got her attention. I have read a few of books featuring the New Day ladies and I have to say that this one will have book groups discussing it long after the meeting is over! The title is perfect! Pick up your copy and meet the latest diva! This is some good reading HERE! Awesome work E.N.Joy!!!

[Sheronda H · Rating 4 out of 5]

The majority of the book was hard to read. So many heavy topics. She experienced so much trauma and pain. I’m glad she was able to overcome at the end.

[Destiny Adams · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was an emotionally gripping and spiritually stirring read that took me on a powerful journey from brokenness to redemption. This book was heavy—not because of difficult writing, but because of the raw truth it presents about life, choices, pain, and the mercy of God.

From the very beginning, I was drawn into the deeply personal struggles of the main character. Her past was messy, her wounds were deep, and her decisions often came from a place of hurt. As the story unfolded, I found myself on an emotional roller coaster—sometimes angry, sometimes heartbroken, but always hopeful. E.N. Joy masterfully writes in a way that doesn’t sugarcoat sin or suffering, but instead reveals how God’s grace is bigger than our darkest moments.

What I loved most was the powerful message woven throughout the book: no one is beyond saving. Christ can redeem any story. Even when we suffer because of choices we made outside of God’s will, His arms are still open. The transformation the main character undergoes is nothing short of inspiring, and it left me reflecting on how God can use even our worst experiences for His glory.

I would have liked to have a trigger warning about the suicide attempts and thoughts. This story is not for the faint of heart, but it is for the soul that needs reminding that God can bring beauty from ashes. If you’re looking for a Christian fiction novel that challenges, uplifts, and speaks truth, I Ain’t Me No More is a must-read.

[Shalonda · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was my first time reading E.N Joy. In I Ain't Me No More she introduces us to Helen. Helen has alwaya felt like the outcast in her family. Everyone mad her feel bad about her dark skin until she meets Dub. Does Dub become her knight in shining armour or her worst night mare. This book was very personal to me because of the journey Helen went on. Looking forward to the next book in this series.

[Juanesia · Rating 5 out of 5]

I ain't me no more told a story of many young women that have chosen to remain silent about. We are given pieces that have been destroyed at the hands of another and witness how God has kept Helen. I really enjoyed part one of this series. #KNL

[Marissa · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book will definitely take you through the storm. Helen's story is so relatable you cannot help but to go through the motions with her. Excellent story! 5 star certified.

[Diane Rembert · Rating 5 out of 5]

Book One of the Always Divas Series is all about Helen. She tells the tumultuous story, which is her life…self-love, her search for love, toxic relationships, motherhood, domestic violence and survival.

I kept hearing about this book, but it was @michellelindorice who finally convinced me that I needed to read it. I cannot thank her more and couldn't stop thinking that I just want to fly to @blessedselling_author_enjoy current state of residence and give her a hug. The transparency in this book will not only inspire someone, but encourage others that God can bring you thru ANYTHING and…still make you shine like a 💎.

I gave this book 💎💎💎💎💎 and highly recomm

[Beth Alsmeyer · Rating 4 out of 5]

I loved the message of this book. It proclaimed boldly that anyone can be saved and become a new creation in Christ. But this didn’t come until the very end. Most of the book was a detailed account of the main character, Helen’s, life and all she suffered. I was graphic and very sad. Although some of the descriptions seemed unnecessarily appalling, it did give a very in depth look at domestic abuse which I think would build incredible empathy in anyone. It also gave great insight into the question of why someone doesn’t just leave an abusive situation. It was compelling but heavy and sad.
I loved the language of this book. It was snappy and expressive.

[Carol Hornsby-mccoy · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a mighty God we serve! God stands at our doors, he knocks and then he waits for us to say come in. He never interferes, he listen, he sees and he’s there but he never judges. He waits, and waits and waits until we’re ready. Then he lets us know I’m everything you could have ever dream, hoped or prayed for and more. Oh what needless pain we bear. All that Helen endured, he was there. But she had to first except him for who he was and believe that he could do any and all things. She had to be willing to leave the past behind and take up her cross and follow Christ. Great book, simply great!

[Johari D Sheared · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great Book

I finished this book in one day because it was very interesting. I was getting upset when Helen kept taking Dub back. I could not stand Dub's mother because she kept defending her abusive son. It took Dub being incarcerated for a while before he was willing to change. In the end, Helen seemed to have forgiven Dub. I understood that he was a product of witnessing his father abusing his mother. Parents need to watch what they do around their children because they mimic those behaviors.

[Sheryl Boyce · Rating 5 out of 5]

I LOVE E.N.Joy's series books!!! This one right here will make you want to lose your religion, but you will get it back in the end. LOL I got sooo mad at the main character in the book and I stayed mad at her until the end. I just couldn't believe a woman could keep taking beatings from a man like she was. Every time she had a way out, she didn't take it! Read this page turner! On to the next one!

[Poetic Diva504 · Rating 2 out of 5]

I read this book once and decided to stop reading. The second time around, I chose to get the free audiobook on audible instead of reading the hardback to see it that would make a difference. Nope. Now I remember that mentions of suicidal ideations with no prior trigger warning was the reason I DNF. I think this would be a good book for people who don’t have triggers. But it’s too emotionally intense for me to keep going.

[Teresa Davis · Rating 4 out of 5]

I ain’t me no more

It was a hard book to read because of all the abuse but I hung in there because I know that E.N. Joy is truly a talented author. This book will help someone seek God who has turned in every direction except for what God has to offer. God can stop the hurt and give you peace to enjoy the life that He has intended for you to live.

[Veronica Jones · Rating 3 out of 5]

Book #1 of the Always Diva Series was truly a GOOD READ..... I loved how Helen's story was put together and in the end how true forgiveness was shown. That's how it should be in LIFE :-)

Can't wait to read the rest of the series!!!!!!

[Melanin Seduction · Rating 5 out of 5]

I really enjoyed this book and it was very relatable and Helen had to go through so many obstacles in her life and I feel like this book will teach you how to have faith in any situation no matter what you go through you gotta have faith!

[Christy]

When I read the first page I was hooked. It shines the light on how those in church are quick to pass judgements on those who may be new to the church. It is easy to throw stones at someone else's house and forget your house is made of glass as well.

This was a great read. I really enjoyed it.

[Tamara Thomas · Rating 5 out of 5]

Even though it's fiction, the topic is not. ..physical, emotional, mental, financial, and sexual abuse is very real, and if not dealt with properly, it can ruin many lives....an excellent book!

[Barbara Faulk · Rating 4 out of 5]

it was a great read

[Msdiva · Rating 5 out of 5]

Another Great Book

As always another great book! This lady never disappoints. I love the story about domestic abuse and teens. I can’t wait to read the next book in this series.

[Courtney Nicole Clark · Rating 5 out of 5]

I love this author!

[Rita · Rating 5 out of 5]

Ienjoy the book, what can I say?

[Jennifer M · Rating 4 out of 5]

wow...we must all trust Gods plan. It's amazing the path we can go down just to run into Gods arms eventually.

[Literature · Rating 3 out of 5]

I would've given it more stars but Helen aggravated me soo much. I just wanted to shake some sense into her, but a good read

[Keane Guiden · Rating 3 out of 5]

I found this to be a decent read. A bit long but a decent read. A couple of the characters and situations were rather disturbing

[Jennifer · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a book! Really enjoyed it and the characters were believable!!

[Marva Harden · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent read the story of Helen and how a lack of self worth from a young child festered and hindered her mental growth. The abuse she suffered is so real. This may be fiction but the topic is not. A page turner.

[Jenise · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 ⭐ but did NOT round up to 4 because...... I was really annoyed by the FMC.

The book was good. A Christian fiction book that reads like an UF is always entertaining to me, but I just felt like this book was a bit long and the FMC made SO MANY bad choices that really annoyed me. And it wasn't just the fact that she made bad choices but it was also the way she ALLOWED herself to be controlled.

The BD's mom made me so angry every time she was on the page.

I just wanted the FMC to get her life together and she had SO MANY ways to escape and would not choose it until the very end of the book. It was exhausting.

I think this is a series and I am interested in reading the others, not right away but I def want to finish the series.

[The Book Chick · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5. I had a hard time with the rating. This was a very good story so don't be discouraged by the rating. The author told a very involved and emotional story. How the story was told is what knocked some points off for me. There was a LOT of expository prose. A lot more telling than showing. She would tell a whole situation, the character would self analyze and then there would be an example of what was told with a little dialogue. Everyone can't do this and be good at it. This author pulled it off however I was getting drained early on. The major religious tenets were sketchy at best. This was a Christian read so I always look for how it will be expressed in the story. I thought that the thing that happened with Dino was very unscriptural. It's not that simple to walk. That's all I will say as not to spoil it. Also the plan of salvation at the end was not founded. I just think that if you do a Christian book then some things should not be written if you aren't going to write them with scriptural base. Or if you will give your own theory or church's theory of salvation.I never like when authors want to use a curse words but use that weird language that substitutes for the profanity. It makes the dialogue weird. I say if you don't want to use profanity then write it so that you don't have to use anything to substitute for it."witch" does not substitute nor does "freak". Sorry. It just sounds weird. No one talks like that. But all in all this story is very realistic in terms of the theme. The author does a great job at making the reader feel. I will try E.N. Joy again but I'm skeptical that her writing style can hold up under a less likable storyline.