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Audio CD
First published August 1, 1997
On Saturday, Ashley and I ran a Spartan Beast race which consists of a half marathon and 30+ obstacles interspersed throughout it. Given that the race takes several hours to complete I had brought a few treats and energy items such as power bars, Shot Blocks, and a Gu to eat during the race. Unfortunately, in the beginning of the race I lost all but one of the food items (we'll call them treats). I figured we had better eat that last remaining treat sooner rather than later before we bonked (anyone familiar with long exercising and bonking knows it's the worst and you can't recover quickly from it). It was at this time I noticed that the ground was littered with wrappers of people who had thrown away their treats. I wondered to myself "maybe some unopened treats had accidentally fallen out of their pockets like mine did and we'd be able to find some good 'ground scores' (an Anasazi term for finding something on the ground)." So I began scouring the ground as I ran but was let down every time because some wrappers looked full and I'd reach down to pick them up only to find a sticky mess and almost reducing me to tears. These 'mirages' were very deceiving. I decided that I needed to apply The Secret and Manifest to the Universe that we needed some treats to endure our race which we still had more than halfway to go. I thought to myself, "We're going to find some treats and the Universe will provide somehow." About 10 minutes later I found my first ground score! I shouted praises to the High Heavens above and Ashley and I quickly devoured the Gu. Then, a while later while climbing up the embankment of a river I found some Shot Blocks in the mud that were still sealed in it's wrapper! I ate a few and passed the rest to Ashley. By now we were quite content and getting our Second Wind to keep going in the race. Things were looking great until an hour later we were feeling close to bonking again. Not long after asking the Universe for another treat I found an unopened mustard packet on the ground. I tell you mustard had never tasted so good before. Unfortunately, it didn't last long until we were ravenous again. In my delirious state of stumbling on the dusty, beaten path my eyes were fixed on the ground for any clues of treats. While muttering another prayer to the Universe - to my utter amazement and much astonishment - I found a single granola bar out of it's wrapper tossed by the wayside in the brush. Miraculously, my eyes were able to detect this camouflage-like treat among the shrubs and yellowed grass. I inspected the bar and wiped off any dirt and split it in half with Ashley. Fueled by yet again another Manifestation, I gave a prayer of thanks to the Universe. At this time we were seeing light at the end of the tunnel but we still had a ways to go. While crawling under the barbed wire obstacle, I began to be desperate for something, anything! I found an open bag of Shot Blocks with one last miserable Block in it. I bit it in half and ate one piece while handing the other half to Ashley. Frantically searching for more treats while crawling on my belly, I reached for empty Gu packets and sucked out the last few drops that a previous contender carelessly threw by the wayside. I found a few more nearly finished Gu packets for Ashley which she gratefully accepted. By now the sun had began to set and we could hear the distant crowd at the finish line. We had made it. Thank you Universe.