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Cash Out
Imagine a story by Ben Mezrich (The Accidental Billionaires, 21) of staggering financial improprieties infused with Tim Dorsey's (Hurricane Punch, Gator A-Go-Go) zany, over-the-top pure insanity, and you might have something somewhat resembling Cash Out, the rollicking debut novel by Greg Bardsley. This is nonstop, mercilessly hilarious, no-holds-barred fiction for fans of The Hangover and Office Space--an outrageous tall tale that follows one desperate, disgruntled Silicon Valley exec through his surreal three-day scramble to cash out his stock options and leave behind his hated high-tech job before outrageous villains (and even crazier friends) completely destroy him. Do you like the wildly satirical work of Tom Perrotta, Sam Lipsyte, and Gary Shteyngart? Do the ingenious comic caper novels of Elmore Leonard leave you breathless and exhilarated? Then get ready to Cash Out.
400 pages, Paperback
First published October 9, 2012
39 people are currently reading
563 people want to read
About the author
Greg Bardsley
8 books23 followersGreg Bardsley is the author of The Bob Watson [2016] and Cash Out [2012], which was listed by the New York Times as one of five notable novels written about Silicon Valley. His award-winning short fiction has appeared in numerous journals and anthologies. A former columnist and speechwriter, he lives in the San Francisco Bay area.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 69 reviews
May 26, 2012
From what I understand, I might be biased, as I wrote CASH OUT.
July 12, 2012
Hilarious!
May 24, 2016
What a great random find. Proper satires are difficult enough to come by, especially quality ones. Dan Jordan is having a tough few days. He's dangerously close to cashing out of his cushy, but ultimately soul stealing, Silicon Valley job with a seven figure payout and buying himself and his family a happy new life. But first he has to grapple with blackmail threats, marital problems, obnoxious coworkers, insane neighbors, devastated set of balls (literally anatomically so), crazed college girls, a variety of assassins and saboteurs, sleep deprivation, copious amount of violence against his person and to top it all off his own often confused conscience. Tough few days indeed, especially for a regular guy with a reasonable dream and a fairly decent moral compass, who simply got lost in the most popular (pecuniary driven) version of the American dream. Beware exigencies of Mammon and all that. Bardsley draws a lot from his own experiences and writes what he knows, like the main protagonist he is a speech writer for a tech company, family man, California native. One hopes he never had to climb the sort of mountains his hero does (or dig himself from under the giant steaming piles of fecal matter that gets so enthusiastically shoveled onto him), but he's got a lovely imagination and a knack for fun dynamic storytelling, mixing in just the right amounts of humor, drama and action. Doesn't look like the author has any other novels out, which is (unless this was his one and done) something he should definitely work on. Really enjoyable read, funny, nicely paced, thoroughly entertaining. Enthusiastically recommended.
October 26, 2012
When I read that CASH OUT was supposed to be like Office Space, I was skeptical. I'm a fan of that movie, so this book had better be good, I thought when I started reading.
CASH OUT is better. The book features Dan Jordan, who just had a vasectomy and just needs three days before his stock option at his firm mature, so he can cash-out. But Dan made some questionable choices, and now a posse of angry IT guys are blackmailing him, and there's some corporate muscle on his tail... Things only get worse from there.
The book is full of colorful characters (like Crazy Larry), outlandish situations, but grounded in a reality you can relate to. CASH OUT is the story of Generation X, all grown up, and faced with the good and bad decisions that got them beyond those Office Space days. Great humor, fast-paced, and unexpected.
CASH OUT is a unique book that reads like a movie script. I highly recommend it.
CASH OUT is better. The book features Dan Jordan, who just had a vasectomy and just needs three days before his stock option at his firm mature, so he can cash-out. But Dan made some questionable choices, and now a posse of angry IT guys are blackmailing him, and there's some corporate muscle on his tail... Things only get worse from there.
The book is full of colorful characters (like Crazy Larry), outlandish situations, but grounded in a reality you can relate to. CASH OUT is the story of Generation X, all grown up, and faced with the good and bad decisions that got them beyond those Office Space days. Great humor, fast-paced, and unexpected.
CASH OUT is a unique book that reads like a movie script. I highly recommend it.
August 3, 2012
I should just never read the blurbage on books, because this was supposed to be a "sidesplitting romp" and, well, after 100-ish pages, I was waiting for even a mild chuckle.
Obviously I didn't read far enough to find out why two apparently unrelated groups were going after Dan (or possibly it's only about his soon-to-vest stock options that will make him a millionaire - single million, by the way, not serious IT venture money). Nor did I really care why, or whether or not he and his wife would make their relationship work. The couples counselor? Godawful and if that was the author's idea of satire it simply doesn't work.
ARC provided by publisher.
Obviously I didn't read far enough to find out why two apparently unrelated groups were going after Dan (or possibly it's only about his soon-to-vest stock options that will make him a millionaire - single million, by the way, not serious IT venture money). Nor did I really care why, or whether or not he and his wife would make their relationship work. The couples counselor? Godawful and if that was the author's idea of satire it simply doesn't work.
ARC provided by publisher.
November 1, 2012
This was another book that just landed on my desk. I was looking for a good read for a recent plane trip, and grabbed it out of my trunk at the airport, not knowing much about the book or Bardsley. Must say, it was the best of surprises. It's about a former newspaper reporter who has sold out to work for a dot-com who is on the verge of cashing out his options before everything unravels. The pace is fast, and the storytelling sharp and very, very funny. And on a personal level, it didn't hurt that I could see many similarities between the main character and me (reporter, two kids, trying to make ends meet in the Bay Area, a certain medical procedure.) Highly recommended. Can only assume with will be made into a movie soon starring Ed Helms.
November 8, 2012
Book Review & Giveaway: We’re participating in the Thankful for Books Giveaway Hop, and our giveaway for that hop is Cash Out by Greg Bardsley. I’m dedicating my review of this hilariously funny romp to all the folks I used to work with in the dot.com industry. I think it’s also going to reinforce all of the stereotypes about the nuts who live in California but that’s okay because we’re damn proud to be nuts out here. The Los Angeles Times Review of Books called Cash Out “a psychotic head-scratcher in the best possible way…wild, unpredictable, and totally original.” That pretty much sums it up. Read the rest of my review & enter to win a copy at http://popcornreads.com/?p=4909.
July 24, 2012
Cash Out is a wonderful combination of the bizarre, hysterical, and gruesome. I was first turned on to Greg Bardsley's writing a few years ago when I read his short story "Upper Decking." Amazing! He has a very distinct voice: funny, somewhat crime centric, off-beat characters, a little violence thrown in. I agree with another review that I could see Cash Out being turned into a movie. A future cult classic, like The Big Lebowski. Buy it. Read it.
January 24, 2013
A really wonderful and entertaining book. I finished it in record time. There are some very well developed and interesting characters, such as Crazy Larry (who reminds me a bit of Serge Storms, from Tim Dorsey novels) and Calhoun (who reminds me, a bit, of Newman on Seinfeld). I laughed very hard at times. The plot is pretty straightforward, but still original and zany. Very well written and poignant at times, too.
June 18, 2012
I'm a big fan of testicle-based humor and office satires, but Cash Out didn't deliver a single LOL for me. I don't want to be a jerk, but I think the back cover copy ("Office Space as remade by the creators of The Hangover," "side-splitting," etc.) over-promises, to say the least.
June 24, 2013
Cash Out by Greg Bardsley does for Silicon Valley what Hunter S. Thompson did for Las Vegas. His new novel, Cash Out, is a 400-page gonzo-journalism inspired riff on a bizarre world hidden behind the bland office parks and drab suburbs of the San Francisco Bay Area.
His alter-ego, Dan Jordan, is days away from seeing his $1 million stock options vest, yet the moment he leaves the medical office where's he's just had a vasectomy, things start unraveling. He's kidnapped by a rabid band of redundant IT workers who blackmail him into betraying the trust of the executive he writes speeches for. From this point on, the clock is ticking and the game's afoot.
Bardsley, I mean Jordan, is an emasculated postmodern hero married to a kick boxing beauty and best friends with a cage fighter. Caught in a maelstrom of comic book violence he lurches from one scrape to the next, searching for bags of frozen peas to numb his bruised gonads, surviving on pain killers and alcohol. He loves his family, despises his boss and is unnerved by a cartoon character cast of neighbors who indulge in sadistic rituals with lawn furniture behind the innocent facades of their suburban garage doors. Some truly strange stuff here. I'll never be able to ride on the upper deck of a London bus again without the sour memory of Bardsley's scatological imagination re-surfacing.
Silicon Valley Speechwriter
Greg and I have worked as speechwriters at some of the same Silicon Valley companies. But his novel describes a parallel universe that I could not possibly have imagined. Nor did I find anyone recognizable in this work of fiction. He really did rearrange faces and give them all other names.
But anyone who makes their living as a professional speechwriter will recognize his interactions with egotistical executives, scheming support staff and the faux-glamour life in the corporate jet fast lane. For me, the vasectomy and subsequent attacks on his mid-section symbolically represent all the suffering speechwriters endure: doing whatever it takes to put words of wisdom into the mouths of the real men who deliver the speeches; constantly threatened with crazy deadlines, undermined by outside consultants, sleep deprived and subservient.
Greg is a fantastic writer. The dialog crackles, the pace is relentless, the characters unforgettable. The lottery-like frenzy of Silicon Valley stock options must have given rise to countless tales of those who were able to cash out and those who missed the jackpot by a few months, weeks or days.
You don't need to go to Las Vegas to gamble your life away. Cash Out tears the veneer off the Silicon Valley stock-option crapshoot. Kudos to Greg Bardsley for telling it like it is.
His alter-ego, Dan Jordan, is days away from seeing his $1 million stock options vest, yet the moment he leaves the medical office where's he's just had a vasectomy, things start unraveling. He's kidnapped by a rabid band of redundant IT workers who blackmail him into betraying the trust of the executive he writes speeches for. From this point on, the clock is ticking and the game's afoot.
Bardsley, I mean Jordan, is an emasculated postmodern hero married to a kick boxing beauty and best friends with a cage fighter. Caught in a maelstrom of comic book violence he lurches from one scrape to the next, searching for bags of frozen peas to numb his bruised gonads, surviving on pain killers and alcohol. He loves his family, despises his boss and is unnerved by a cartoon character cast of neighbors who indulge in sadistic rituals with lawn furniture behind the innocent facades of their suburban garage doors. Some truly strange stuff here. I'll never be able to ride on the upper deck of a London bus again without the sour memory of Bardsley's scatological imagination re-surfacing.
Silicon Valley Speechwriter
Greg and I have worked as speechwriters at some of the same Silicon Valley companies. But his novel describes a parallel universe that I could not possibly have imagined. Nor did I find anyone recognizable in this work of fiction. He really did rearrange faces and give them all other names.
But anyone who makes their living as a professional speechwriter will recognize his interactions with egotistical executives, scheming support staff and the faux-glamour life in the corporate jet fast lane. For me, the vasectomy and subsequent attacks on his mid-section symbolically represent all the suffering speechwriters endure: doing whatever it takes to put words of wisdom into the mouths of the real men who deliver the speeches; constantly threatened with crazy deadlines, undermined by outside consultants, sleep deprived and subservient.
Greg is a fantastic writer. The dialog crackles, the pace is relentless, the characters unforgettable. The lottery-like frenzy of Silicon Valley stock options must have given rise to countless tales of those who were able to cash out and those who missed the jackpot by a few months, weeks or days.
You don't need to go to Las Vegas to gamble your life away. Cash Out tears the veneer off the Silicon Valley stock-option crapshoot. Kudos to Greg Bardsley for telling it like it is.
October 6, 2012
Daniel Jordon is a speak writer for Stephen Fritzroy at FlowBids. He is getting ready to cash out his options which will mean he will be in a lot of money, he just has to last a few more days. However, after receiving a vasectomy, which is how the book starts out him in the doctors office getting the procedure, he is attacked by three geeks. Unsure of what they really want from him he goes to the grocery store to pick up some peas for relief to the area of his recent procedure. While getting the peas he is slammed into the freezer by some big bald guy. Is this bald guy and the geeks connected or was he just in the wrong place at the wrong time? He is so confused. He ends up late for his counselling meeting with his wife on how to bring their sex life back to life; only to have his wife and the counselor not believe him, even though it is obvious he's been in a fight. He tries to explain what has happened over the last few hours to his wife, but she still is having a hard time believing this. Daniel decides to pick up the kids and finds baldy at the park playing with his kids. Lucky for Daniel his neighbor is there to help out when the fight erupts. Confused he calls his wife from jail advising to call his friend Rod Stone, an MMA fighter, to come and watch over them for the night considering he has not idea what is going on or who is out to get him or his family. Released early the next morning, writhing in pain Daniel returns home to find Rod awake watching things. Daniel explains to Rod what has happened and soon they are on the hunt to find out what is really going on. Who is trying to frame who and why? Why are they after him and his family? And why is all of this happening right before he is able to cash out?
This was a hilarious book filled with ups and downs, but constantly kept me wondering what was going to happen next and why this was all happening. I was hooked from the very beginning. I enjoyed Bardsley's take on mystery and comedy and the thrill of the hunt throughout the book. It was hard to know what was coming next, let along why it was happening, but he did wrap it all up in the end. I found the ending a little weak for such a climatic book, but it did tie up all loose ends and why certain things happened throughout the book.
I would like to thank Goodsread and Greg Bardsley for giving me this advanced copy of the book. I am sure it will be a hit!
This was a hilarious book filled with ups and downs, but constantly kept me wondering what was going to happen next and why this was all happening. I was hooked from the very beginning. I enjoyed Bardsley's take on mystery and comedy and the thrill of the hunt throughout the book. It was hard to know what was coming next, let along why it was happening, but he did wrap it all up in the end. I found the ending a little weak for such a climatic book, but it did tie up all loose ends and why certain things happened throughout the book.
I would like to thank Goodsread and Greg Bardsley for giving me this advanced copy of the book. I am sure it will be a hit!
January 26, 2013
First a short disclaimer, I have known Greg since he was in middle school? May be longer? He was my brother Mike's best friend growing up. He is incredibly special to my entire family and living proof, good guys exist.
I am so proud of Greg. This book was a really fun read. It was silly, twisted, warped, over the top, yet lovable. The characters were hysterical, memorable and amusing. The plot was right out of some caper movie. If you want a book that will make you laugh out loud with its constant barrage of "thing's not quite working out as planned", this book is for you. I will admit, I only picked up this book because I know Greg. It's not a typical genre for me. In fact, I would guess it's more of a man's book. Yet, I enjoyed it from beginning to end and Mike would have loved it too.
Good job Greg.
I am so proud of Greg. This book was a really fun read. It was silly, twisted, warped, over the top, yet lovable. The characters were hysterical, memorable and amusing. The plot was right out of some caper movie. If you want a book that will make you laugh out loud with its constant barrage of "thing's not quite working out as planned", this book is for you. I will admit, I only picked up this book because I know Greg. It's not a typical genre for me. In fact, I would guess it's more of a man's book. Yet, I enjoyed it from beginning to end and Mike would have loved it too.
Good job Greg.
November 22, 2012
Dan Jordan, speech writer for the CEO of FlowBid, a Silicon Valley startup. And in three days, he can cash out his stock and be an instant millionaire. Then he and his wife could live the lives they’ve dreamed of. Only one problem, in those three days, he gets a vasectomy, is kidnapped, and threatened to be exposed for some illicit behavior at work. Where it all leads to is one humorous rollercoaster of a ride.
This faced pace comical story is an easy read (it does have raunchy dialogue). Did it have laugh-out-loud parts? I didn’t think so, but I enjoyed the story for what it was and the author is a good story teller. Its part mystery (with many twists) and part comedy.
This faced pace comical story is an easy read (it does have raunchy dialogue). Did it have laugh-out-loud parts? I didn’t think so, but I enjoyed the story for what it was and the author is a good story teller. Its part mystery (with many twists) and part comedy.
August 15, 2012
I received this book for free through Goodreads First Reads.
Greg Bardsley's book Cash Out is a delightful read. It is a fast pace, action filled and witty novel. Overall Bardsley has done a splendid job telling us a story full of twists and turns that keeps the reader hanging on every word.
Greg Bardsley's book Cash Out is a delightful read. It is a fast pace, action filled and witty novel. Overall Bardsley has done a splendid job telling us a story full of twists and turns that keeps the reader hanging on every word.
December 2, 2012
A laugh-out loud, totally original send-up of Silicon Valley. Greg Bardsley is a fresh new talent, and his writing goes down as smoothly as a cold beer on a hot day. Loved this book and can't wait to read Bardsley's follow-up. More, please.
November 6, 2012
Excellent page turner. Hilarious and action packed. Highly recommended!
November 13, 2012
Spent most of the time reading this book cringing. Not funny at all, like the author claimed. I'm glad a got an uncorrected proof at a conference and didn't pay for this crap.
December 23, 2012
I enjoyed the hell out of this book. Smart, entertaining, and funny. I can't wit for this author's next novel.
February 18, 2013
This books claims to be a satire, it's really just terrible. I kept reading hoping it would get better, did not happen. Then i kept reading to see if it would get worse, it did.
May 8, 2017
A bit of Carl Hiaasen meets Silicon Valley nuttiness. As a professional working in Silicon Valley for three decades, I'm not able to recognize any of the zany characters or situations. "Cashing Out" is such a rare thing that it requires 6 degrees of separation to find someone who has really made a financial killing. OTOH, I know lots of people who lost money working for start-ups. So I'd say this book is a fun _fictional_ romp through what the rest of the world perceives as happening all the time in Silicon Valley.
January 24, 2019
Good Story Telling
Cash Out starts fast and developed the characters very well. The story moved along and I found myself caring about the characters, hoping they would find a way out of the maze.
Cash Out starts fast and developed the characters very well. The story moved along and I found myself caring about the characters, hoping they would find a way out of the maze.
May 12, 2020
had it's moments
September 16, 2020
Fun book
Quirky , funny and lots of twists and turns. I could empathize with main character. Look for more by author
Quirky , funny and lots of twists and turns. I could empathize with main character. Look for more by author
April 8, 2021
Exhausting read
May 30, 2017
great fun read..a funny wacky story that has good depth...and keeps the thrill ride going full throttle till then end.
April 10, 2021
Fun read!
January 17, 2013
Original review by John posted at Layers of Thought.
A madcap caper set in the unlikely location of Silicon Valley – an ordinary guy tries to cash out while everyone else seems determined to try and stop him.
John's thoughts on what it's about: Dan Jordan thinks he’s a pretty ordinary guy – an ex-journalist who happened to find himself working as a speechwriter for the CEO of a Silicon Valley startup. The company grows like gangbusters and Dan’s stock options become worth over a millions dollars. But he has to be still employed by the company on the day when his stock becomes eligible for cashing out; and now he is counting down the last few days.
He despairs about the Silicon Valley culture and lifestyle/work-style; he really doesn’t fit in and dreams of using the money to drop-out with his wife, hoping to move to the California coast and to live a life they’ve always wanted. He just has to hold on for those last few days.
The trouble is that there is an ever-growing mob of people who seem to be doing everything possible to stop him reaching that milestone – including a gang of nerdy IT kidnappers, a muscle-bound corporate security hit-man, ultra-competitive “colleagues” and a long list of others I can’t describe without spoiling the plot. Contrastingly, in theory Dan has helping him out a sociopathic neighbor and a friend from school days who happens to be a professional cage-fighter. Funny thing is that at times it sure doesn’t feel to Dan like they are helping him at all.
Meanwhile his marriage is in danger of crumbling and he cannot recover from a simple medical procedure which becomes ever-more embarrassing and painful during this stressful romp. Nevertheless, he just has to hold on for a last few days!
John’s summary thoughts: This is a light-hearted easy read, very much in the style of a farce where everything that can go wrong seems to do so; and then some. Bardsley creates some delightfully whacky characters, my favorite being the totally gross guy who is a lodger with the sociopathic neighbor; and the neighbor himself is a fabulously weird creation. As for the main character himself, you certainly start out feeling highly supportive of Dan, though as the story progresses and one crazy dilemma follows after another follows after another, the plot becomes so far-fetched that I stopped thinking of him as a real character and just went along for the humorous ride.
Is Silicon Valley really like this? Well, Bardsley has “done his time” there, having worked as a speechwriter and ghostwriter for Executives, much like Dan Jordan – so he has certainly used his real-life experience as a launching pad for this story and the characters in it. Exaggerated? Of course, but that’s what makes it fun.
I’d recommend this book to anyone who likes a bit of modern slapstick or to those who have worked in the tech industry and enjoy poking fun at some of the odd characters and culture found there. I’d rate this light-hearted read three stars.
A madcap caper set in the unlikely location of Silicon Valley – an ordinary guy tries to cash out while everyone else seems determined to try and stop him.
John's thoughts on what it's about: Dan Jordan thinks he’s a pretty ordinary guy – an ex-journalist who happened to find himself working as a speechwriter for the CEO of a Silicon Valley startup. The company grows like gangbusters and Dan’s stock options become worth over a millions dollars. But he has to be still employed by the company on the day when his stock becomes eligible for cashing out; and now he is counting down the last few days.
He despairs about the Silicon Valley culture and lifestyle/work-style; he really doesn’t fit in and dreams of using the money to drop-out with his wife, hoping to move to the California coast and to live a life they’ve always wanted. He just has to hold on for those last few days.
The trouble is that there is an ever-growing mob of people who seem to be doing everything possible to stop him reaching that milestone – including a gang of nerdy IT kidnappers, a muscle-bound corporate security hit-man, ultra-competitive “colleagues” and a long list of others I can’t describe without spoiling the plot. Contrastingly, in theory Dan has helping him out a sociopathic neighbor and a friend from school days who happens to be a professional cage-fighter. Funny thing is that at times it sure doesn’t feel to Dan like they are helping him at all.
Meanwhile his marriage is in danger of crumbling and he cannot recover from a simple medical procedure which becomes ever-more embarrassing and painful during this stressful romp. Nevertheless, he just has to hold on for a last few days!
John’s summary thoughts: This is a light-hearted easy read, very much in the style of a farce where everything that can go wrong seems to do so; and then some. Bardsley creates some delightfully whacky characters, my favorite being the totally gross guy who is a lodger with the sociopathic neighbor; and the neighbor himself is a fabulously weird creation. As for the main character himself, you certainly start out feeling highly supportive of Dan, though as the story progresses and one crazy dilemma follows after another follows after another, the plot becomes so far-fetched that I stopped thinking of him as a real character and just went along for the humorous ride.
Is Silicon Valley really like this? Well, Bardsley has “done his time” there, having worked as a speechwriter and ghostwriter for Executives, much like Dan Jordan – so he has certainly used his real-life experience as a launching pad for this story and the characters in it. Exaggerated? Of course, but that’s what makes it fun.
I’d recommend this book to anyone who likes a bit of modern slapstick or to those who have worked in the tech industry and enjoy poking fun at some of the odd characters and culture found there. I’d rate this light-hearted read three stars.
Read
February 7, 2013Dan Jordan is having a really bad day. First, in an effort to show his dedication to his wife and his family, he undergoes the dreaded snip. Then, as he is hobbling towards his car for the trip home and a much-needed pack of frozen peas, he is kidnapped by three of the most unlikely criminals. To make matters worse, after his kidnappers let him go, he is assaulted by a muscle-bound man, and assaulted is actually sugar-coating the treatment he receives at the hands of this unknown bulkhead. With three days left until he can cash out his stock options and live happily ever after with his beloved wife and adored sons, all he wants to do is sit tight, ice his testicles, and get the money that will change his life for good. However, in Greg Barsley’s Cash Out, Dan’s options are just not that simple.
Stock options have lost their prestige because companies are not offering them as incentives anymore and because after the stock market turmoil of the past decade, people are leery about their long-term viability in a volatile economy. However, Cash Out occurs right before the beginning of the economic bust, when the stock market was flying high and holding stock in a start-up tech company was something about which most people dreamed. Like all incentives, especially ones that have the potential to be extremely lucrative, there is an underlying catch-22, namely having to sacrifice time and potentially some morals in the name of driving up stock prices. It is a situation Dan thought he had weathered fairly well but still cannot wait to leave, and he knows his vested stock will be the ticket to his life of dreams. Yet, as he is rushes to accede all demands from the various parties after him, he realizes just how much he has sacrificed, namely family, as he was biding his time until the end of the vesting period. Therein lies the charm of Dan’s crazy adventures. He truly is the quintessential family man, albeit one who has made some not-so-familial mistakes that land him in his current troubles.
Cash Out is a sociologist’s dream novel as it hypothesizes on the motivating impact of money, or the potential to obtain it, and the lengths to which people will go to protect their assets. Dan’s love for his wife and his family is unquestionable. While his actions as well as the events themselves may be a bit far-fetched, a reader knows indubitably that everything he does is to get that dream lifestyle for his family. Dan is a congenial enough character, well-meaning and earnest, and while his prior actions may have been questionable – hence the blackmail – his heart is definitely in the right place. Dan’s friends and neighbors provide most of the humor as their well-intentioned behaviors create some of the wackier scenes. The resulting lesson is tremendously appropriate, given today’s focus on materialism and one-upmanship, even if Mr. Bardsley tends to reiterate his point a bit more forcefully than necessary. Enjoyable and timely, Cash Out will make any reader appreciate the fact that even on the worst of days, it will still not be as awful as Dan’s.
Stock options have lost their prestige because companies are not offering them as incentives anymore and because after the stock market turmoil of the past decade, people are leery about their long-term viability in a volatile economy. However, Cash Out occurs right before the beginning of the economic bust, when the stock market was flying high and holding stock in a start-up tech company was something about which most people dreamed. Like all incentives, especially ones that have the potential to be extremely lucrative, there is an underlying catch-22, namely having to sacrifice time and potentially some morals in the name of driving up stock prices. It is a situation Dan thought he had weathered fairly well but still cannot wait to leave, and he knows his vested stock will be the ticket to his life of dreams. Yet, as he is rushes to accede all demands from the various parties after him, he realizes just how much he has sacrificed, namely family, as he was biding his time until the end of the vesting period. Therein lies the charm of Dan’s crazy adventures. He truly is the quintessential family man, albeit one who has made some not-so-familial mistakes that land him in his current troubles.
Cash Out is a sociologist’s dream novel as it hypothesizes on the motivating impact of money, or the potential to obtain it, and the lengths to which people will go to protect their assets. Dan’s love for his wife and his family is unquestionable. While his actions as well as the events themselves may be a bit far-fetched, a reader knows indubitably that everything he does is to get that dream lifestyle for his family. Dan is a congenial enough character, well-meaning and earnest, and while his prior actions may have been questionable – hence the blackmail – his heart is definitely in the right place. Dan’s friends and neighbors provide most of the humor as their well-intentioned behaviors create some of the wackier scenes. The resulting lesson is tremendously appropriate, given today’s focus on materialism and one-upmanship, even if Mr. Bardsley tends to reiterate his point a bit more forcefully than necessary. Enjoyable and timely, Cash Out will make any reader appreciate the fact that even on the worst of days, it will still not be as awful as Dan’s.
August 22, 2013
I was in the mood for a lighthearted caper romp and picked this up to slake that particular thirst. I mean, a book that kicks off with a handful of tech support dudes snatching a Silicon Valley PR dude off the street and spiriting him away in a van is guaranteed to capture my attention. And while the book gamely tries to engage in the kind of outsized hi-jinks and colorful criminal bumbling that fans of Carl Hiaasen and Elmore Leonard love, it all too often veers into low comedy.
The gist of the story is that the our hapless protagonist is days away from his options in a dot-com vesting him into millionariehood (the titular "cash out") that will allow him to quit and relocate to the beach with wife and son. However these techies have dirt on him that will destroy his marriage and family unless he does something that is almost certainly going to get him fired before the options vest. Stuck between a rock and a hard place, he has to scramble to find a way through the mess he's gotten himself into. Fortunately (a little too fortunately, I'd say), his best friend is an MMA fighter, so he's got some muscle at his disposal. Which he'll need, since he waddles through the whole book holding an icepack to his groin, thanks to a fresh vasectomy.
On the whole, the book relies much too heavily on repeated shots to his sore groin and neighbors from the bazaar of the bizarre to be effective. A little of that flavoring goes a long way, and the story is definitely overseasoned to my taste. The action and humor crosses the line at times from colorful to sophomoric -- all of which is not to say that the book is bad. It's not bad, it's just of a certain style and not as clever as I was looking for. Best suited for beach reading by those with an interest in Silicon Valley.
The gist of the story is that the our hapless protagonist is days away from his options in a dot-com vesting him into millionariehood (the titular "cash out") that will allow him to quit and relocate to the beach with wife and son. However these techies have dirt on him that will destroy his marriage and family unless he does something that is almost certainly going to get him fired before the options vest. Stuck between a rock and a hard place, he has to scramble to find a way through the mess he's gotten himself into. Fortunately (a little too fortunately, I'd say), his best friend is an MMA fighter, so he's got some muscle at his disposal. Which he'll need, since he waddles through the whole book holding an icepack to his groin, thanks to a fresh vasectomy.
On the whole, the book relies much too heavily on repeated shots to his sore groin and neighbors from the bazaar of the bizarre to be effective. A little of that flavoring goes a long way, and the story is definitely overseasoned to my taste. The action and humor crosses the line at times from colorful to sophomoric -- all of which is not to say that the book is bad. It's not bad, it's just of a certain style and not as clever as I was looking for. Best suited for beach reading by those with an interest in Silicon Valley.
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