What do you think?
Rate this book
If You're Lucky, Your Heart Will Break: Field Notes from a Zen Life
The book has a casually warm and friendly tone that will appeal to wide variety of readers.
Drawing on sources as diverse as the Bible and comedian Emo Phillips, Ford reflects on his more than four decades walking the Path—and the Big Questions asked and answered (in his words: “sort of”). He examines the nature of Awakening and what it means to work toward it—helping us see, in the words of one chapter title, “Some of What Zen Practice Is, and a Little of What It Isn’t”; he offers a wise perspective on the nature of spiritual directors and enormously helpful counsel on “What to Look for When Looking for a Teacher”; and give us a seasoned look at the core practices of Zen (shikantaza and koan study) within the key principles of not knowing and “sitting down, shutting up, and paying attention.”
This book explores the always fascinating issues of karma and rebirth from the deconstructing perspective of Zen—in a way that will find resonance with both conservatives and the vast audience of Stephen Batchelor’s Confessions of a Buddhist Atheist.
And perhaps most significantly, the last section of the book takes a fresh and nuanced look at the Buddhist Ethical Precepts—which Ford frames as “Seven Suggestions.” There are comparatively few books on this topic, and this one will find wide audience both within the Zen world and beyond.
Drawing on sources as diverse as the Bible and comedian Emo Phillips, Ford reflects on his more than four decades walking the Path—and the Big Questions asked and answered (in his words: “sort of”). He examines the nature of Awakening and what it means to work toward it—helping us see, in the words of one chapter title, “Some of What Zen Practice Is, and a Little of What It Isn’t”; he offers a wise perspective on the nature of spiritual directors and enormously helpful counsel on “What to Look for When Looking for a Teacher”; and give us a seasoned look at the core practices of Zen (shikantaza and koan study) within the key principles of not knowing and “sitting down, shutting up, and paying attention.”
This book explores the always fascinating issues of karma and rebirth from the deconstructing perspective of Zen—in a way that will find resonance with both conservatives and the vast audience of Stephen Batchelor’s Confessions of a Buddhist Atheist.
And perhaps most significantly, the last section of the book takes a fresh and nuanced look at the Buddhist Ethical Precepts—which Ford frames as “Seven Suggestions.” There are comparatively few books on this topic, and this one will find wide audience both within the Zen world and beyond.
196 pages, Paperback
First published September 1, 2012
20 people are currently reading
145 people want to read
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 13 of 13 reviews
July 15, 2012
Review from openbuddha.com.
If You’re Lucky, Your Heart Will Break: Field Notes from a Zen Life is a new book by Rev. James Ishmael Ford that comes out in September. I was lucky enough to be given a review copy of this book, which I have been looking forward to reading.
Rev. Ford (also known as "James Myoun Ford") is one of the guiding teachers and masters of Boundless Way Zen, a Zen organization that brings together Soto Zen and Korean Sŏn in several sanghas on the East Coast of North America. He is also a well known Unitarian Universalist minister and author of the Monkey Mind blog. He is the presiding minister at the First Unitarian Church of Providence, Rhode Island. Rev. Ford often writes on issues of social justice and draws on Zen teachings for his Unitarian sermons (and Unitarian teachings for his Zen sermons!). I've interacted with him online for several years and have found him to be one of the consistently sane, calm, and ethical voices of authority within the Zen community.
This book is written in part as a personal memoir of a Zen teacher who has spent decades in Zen and also as a discussion of Buddhist ethics and the precepts. Like all good Zen teachers, Rev. Ford speaks in reference to lived examples and stories, largely ones drawn from his own life. The text is divided into three parts:
1. What Is Awakening?
2. Sit Down, Shut Up, and Pay Attention
3. Talking the Talk, Walking the Walk
In "What Is Awakening?", Rev. Ford discusses the nature of awakening and the experience of Zen, drawing from his life experiences, such as when he received Dharma Transmission from his own teacher and what that may or may not mean. This is the shortest section, just being a handful of pages really.
In "Sit Down, Shut Up, and Pay Attention," he delves into his autobiography and the actual practice of Zen. How did he come to practice Zen? What is an experience of awakening actually like (and what is it not like, contrary to mythology)? How is Zen actually practiced in a day to day manner, not merely in theory, but as a lived part of your life? He discusses Shikantaza, Just Sitting, the primary practice of Soto Zen and how he's found it to be useful and its functioning. Unusual for a seemingly Soto Zen priest, where koans are not a common tradition, he also delves into koan work quite a bit. Rev. Ford had an early exposure to the koan tradition (or kong-an) as taught by Rev. Sŭngsan, who founded the Kwan Um School of Zen. This gave him a taste of koan work and, as he says in the book, "I had found my heart practice." Through happenstance and his own determination, he wound up work with Rev. John Tarrant, a well known Rinzai Zen teacher, where he practiced the full curriculum of koans as taught within that school. Rev. Ford gives a fairly good introduction to koan work, what it means, how it is practiced, and so forth within his own tradition and dispels many of the popular myths around koan work. As a Zen practitioner who uses the koan tradition of Sŭngsan as one of his primary vehicles of practice, I was quite happy to see an actual popular level discussion and explanation of koan work for the general reader. Texts that touch on it are few and far between. As Rev. Ford states:
In the final section of the book, "Talking the Talk, Walking the Walk," Rev. Ford discusses ethics and precepts, focusing on how it is that we are to live an ethical life. This is the longest section of the book, comprising almost half of it. In this section, Rev. Ford's wider training really shines. He is a graduate of my local Unitarian Universalist seminary, Starr King, and has served as minister for several congregations. In his discussion of ethical behavior, discusses the current controversy in Western Zen around karma and rebirth but moves on quickly to discussing actual ways of living. In this, he draws on both the Noahide Laws, which some point to as an attempt at ethics drawn from a monotheistic, Western, worldview, and the traditional five Pratimoksha vows used within Buddhism. Given his background in both Unitarian Universalism and Zen, I can appreciate that Rev. Ford looks at things in a broader manner, across traditions, rather than limiting his influences to just the world of the Buddhadharma. With these both as influences, Rev. Ford draws a list of seven precepts:
1. Love Your Mother (in the sense of God/dess, the Universe, or Reality-as-it-is)
2. Reverence Life
3. Speak Truthfully
4. Respect Things
5. Respect Our Bodies
6. Seek Justice
7. Seek Clarity
The rest of the book is then a short chapter discussing each of these in turn. In the first and sixth, you can see the influences of both the Judeo-Christian background of the Noahide Laws (as much as I dislike the term "Judeo-Christian") but also the commitment to social justice and activism in the world that characters the better end of that tradition, especially amongst liberal churches like Unitarian Universalism. Rev. Ford mentions that both sexuality and social withdrawl or pacifism are two the "dark shadows" of the Buddhist tradition (or "near enemies" as I tend to think of them) and these are places where other traditions have often seemed to engage better. His examples are often personal and autobiographical, which is really the best way to teach and discuss these things. It is easy to sound "preachy" in an overbearing way when discussing precepts as absolutes or ideals without relating them to lived experience. Fortunatley, Rev. Ford's experience, both on the cushion and in teaching others, comes to the forefront here.
Overall, I really (really) liked this book. It is engaging, humorous in places, deep without being dry, and shows a lot of reflective thought that I think only comes from experience (and Rev. Ford has decades more than me in all of this). This is the kind of book that I'd recommend my fellow Buddhists, especially Zen practitioners, read but which I would also recommend to my non-Buddhist friends and family (such as my Wiccan priestess mother and my Methodist preacher uncle). I think everyone would get something out of the discussion of lived ethics in it but also, for those unfamiliar, a strong taste of what the Buddhdharma, as practiced within Zen, is about at its best as a living and engaged tradition of practice.
If any of this is interesting to you, I suggest that you pick it up and give it a read when it comes out in a couple of months. I'm grateful that we have teachers like Rev. Ford taking the time to write from the heart to share their hard-won realizations with us.
If You’re Lucky, Your Heart Will Break: Field Notes from a Zen Life is a new book by Rev. James Ishmael Ford that comes out in September. I was lucky enough to be given a review copy of this book, which I have been looking forward to reading.
Rev. Ford (also known as "James Myoun Ford") is one of the guiding teachers and masters of Boundless Way Zen, a Zen organization that brings together Soto Zen and Korean Sŏn in several sanghas on the East Coast of North America. He is also a well known Unitarian Universalist minister and author of the Monkey Mind blog. He is the presiding minister at the First Unitarian Church of Providence, Rhode Island. Rev. Ford often writes on issues of social justice and draws on Zen teachings for his Unitarian sermons (and Unitarian teachings for his Zen sermons!). I've interacted with him online for several years and have found him to be one of the consistently sane, calm, and ethical voices of authority within the Zen community.
This book is written in part as a personal memoir of a Zen teacher who has spent decades in Zen and also as a discussion of Buddhist ethics and the precepts. Like all good Zen teachers, Rev. Ford speaks in reference to lived examples and stories, largely ones drawn from his own life. The text is divided into three parts:
1. What Is Awakening?
2. Sit Down, Shut Up, and Pay Attention
3. Talking the Talk, Walking the Walk
In "What Is Awakening?", Rev. Ford discusses the nature of awakening and the experience of Zen, drawing from his life experiences, such as when he received Dharma Transmission from his own teacher and what that may or may not mean. This is the shortest section, just being a handful of pages really.
In "Sit Down, Shut Up, and Pay Attention," he delves into his autobiography and the actual practice of Zen. How did he come to practice Zen? What is an experience of awakening actually like (and what is it not like, contrary to mythology)? How is Zen actually practiced in a day to day manner, not merely in theory, but as a lived part of your life? He discusses Shikantaza, Just Sitting, the primary practice of Soto Zen and how he's found it to be useful and its functioning. Unusual for a seemingly Soto Zen priest, where koans are not a common tradition, he also delves into koan work quite a bit. Rev. Ford had an early exposure to the koan tradition (or kong-an) as taught by Rev. Sŭngsan, who founded the Kwan Um School of Zen. This gave him a taste of koan work and, as he says in the book, "I had found my heart practice." Through happenstance and his own determination, he wound up work with Rev. John Tarrant, a well known Rinzai Zen teacher, where he practiced the full curriculum of koans as taught within that school. Rev. Ford gives a fairly good introduction to koan work, what it means, how it is practiced, and so forth within his own tradition and dispels many of the popular myths around koan work. As a Zen practitioner who uses the koan tradition of Sŭngsan as one of his primary vehicles of practice, I was quite happy to see an actual popular level discussion and explanation of koan work for the general reader. Texts that touch on it are few and far between. As Rev. Ford states:
"Koans are actually about life and death—our lives, our deaths—in the most intimate sense about who we are, you and I, about our true home, about what it is to be human and present to what is, all that is."
In the final section of the book, "Talking the Talk, Walking the Walk," Rev. Ford discusses ethics and precepts, focusing on how it is that we are to live an ethical life. This is the longest section of the book, comprising almost half of it. In this section, Rev. Ford's wider training really shines. He is a graduate of my local Unitarian Universalist seminary, Starr King, and has served as minister for several congregations. In his discussion of ethical behavior, discusses the current controversy in Western Zen around karma and rebirth but moves on quickly to discussing actual ways of living. In this, he draws on both the Noahide Laws, which some point to as an attempt at ethics drawn from a monotheistic, Western, worldview, and the traditional five Pratimoksha vows used within Buddhism. Given his background in both Unitarian Universalism and Zen, I can appreciate that Rev. Ford looks at things in a broader manner, across traditions, rather than limiting his influences to just the world of the Buddhadharma. With these both as influences, Rev. Ford draws a list of seven precepts:
1. Love Your Mother (in the sense of God/dess, the Universe, or Reality-as-it-is)
2. Reverence Life
3. Speak Truthfully
4. Respect Things
5. Respect Our Bodies
6. Seek Justice
7. Seek Clarity
The rest of the book is then a short chapter discussing each of these in turn. In the first and sixth, you can see the influences of both the Judeo-Christian background of the Noahide Laws (as much as I dislike the term "Judeo-Christian") but also the commitment to social justice and activism in the world that characters the better end of that tradition, especially amongst liberal churches like Unitarian Universalism. Rev. Ford mentions that both sexuality and social withdrawl or pacifism are two the "dark shadows" of the Buddhist tradition (or "near enemies" as I tend to think of them) and these are places where other traditions have often seemed to engage better. His examples are often personal and autobiographical, which is really the best way to teach and discuss these things. It is easy to sound "preachy" in an overbearing way when discussing precepts as absolutes or ideals without relating them to lived experience. Fortunatley, Rev. Ford's experience, both on the cushion and in teaching others, comes to the forefront here.
Overall, I really (really) liked this book. It is engaging, humorous in places, deep without being dry, and shows a lot of reflective thought that I think only comes from experience (and Rev. Ford has decades more than me in all of this). This is the kind of book that I'd recommend my fellow Buddhists, especially Zen practitioners, read but which I would also recommend to my non-Buddhist friends and family (such as my Wiccan priestess mother and my Methodist preacher uncle). I think everyone would get something out of the discussion of lived ethics in it but also, for those unfamiliar, a strong taste of what the Buddhdharma, as practiced within Zen, is about at its best as a living and engaged tradition of practice.
If any of this is interesting to you, I suggest that you pick it up and give it a read when it comes out in a couple of months. I'm grateful that we have teachers like Rev. Ford taking the time to write from the heart to share their hard-won realizations with us.
November 6, 2022
I'll do my best to make this a review of only the book, and not of Zen Buddhism, a practice in which I have been engaged on-and-off for about 6 years. Lots of books could give you a good primer to Zen, but what I find unique about this text is James Ford does his best to reconcile Zen with the Western traditions is which he (and I) have been steeped. I definitely came into this book looking for where the truth is in Zen, ready to believe some things and not others in a kind of humanist pick-and-choose, and Ford generously meets me there. I deeply respect the candor with which he, very early in the book, draws the reader's attention to differences between Western/liberal/convert/secular/rationalist Zen and traditional/orthodox/Asian Zen, how they are practiced in different communities and often have different beliefs. This is something I have seen be uncomfortable for other white Zen practitioners and teachers to discuss, who can understandably be drawn to the "cred" that authenticity (i.e. living in Japan, the claim that the Dharma is unchanged as it has been transmitted through the ages from teacher to teacher back to Gautama Buddha, etc.) grants.
I like hearing about James Ford's personal history, how he encountered his teachers, how he felt as he traveled down his own spiritual path. This is great and fun, he has a wry sense of humor. That said, I don't have much to say about these sections of the book.
There are so many assertions in Zen. One I come back to often, with doubt in my heart, is Ford's assertion on page 38 that "Here's a hard fact. Just sitting once a week is not a Zen practice... I think for most of us sitting a minimum of about a half an hour a day, most days of the week, is the baseline. And if you can also throw in some retreats once in a while, that's generally even better. The majority of serious Zen practitioners do more than this." The use of "hard fact" here is somewhat ambiguous (does he mean "absolutely true" or "emotionally difficult to accept"?) I find this statement, evidentially speaking, significantly harder to believe than another fact Buddhism holds dear: that I am of the nature to have ill health, get old, and die (though this one hits much harder on an emotional level). Make no mistake, this is a book about the nature of "truth", a word that appears more times in the text than suffering, dharma, and compassion combined (the find function on my pdf copy aided this count). But for all that Ford says things like (p. 89) "Anecdote doesn't replace science. If you want to claim some action causes something in the real world, don't look for a feel good book... find the studies that prove it", he doesn't seem to really apply this everywhere. And that's... largely fine, I think. okay. There are lots of true things that can never been scientifically proven, like "murder is wrong" and "I love my mom, even when she says something hurtful to me". These claims exist separate from empirical claims like "2+2=4". How then to categorize Ford's 30-minutes a day, or the significantly more mystical (p. 63) "As we push through any koan--experiencing great doubt, great faith, and great determination--we find the exact identity between our ordinary consciousness and fundamental openness"? At what level do these claims live? How literally true could they be? Or, I think a better question yet, what definitions of vast words like "self" allow us to interpret the poetry of Zen to make those statements true? I think a lot of Christians do some interesting work around their interpretation of "God" that doesn't necessarily align with the literal view of divinity found in the Bible, but nevertheless resonates with them. In one chapter, James Ford discusses how he, and other liberal Buddhists, do this kind of work with the concepts of rebirth and karma, and how they've taken on a much more psychological, metaphorical meaning, and how that redefining can also sometimes be dangerous and controversial (but sometimes quite good, like the expanded inclusivity of women in Zen). This also reflects much of what Ford brings to the precepts. Literally, we must not kill (but also, we can't not kill); literally, we must not misuse sex or drugs (but don't get any funny ideas about disengaging from these things completely as other generations and traditions of Buddhists have, because they are a valuable part of the fullness of life). And I think Ford is right! I can't say that this framing doesn't resonate with me, it really, really does. But why? Why should it resonate? I return to that fundamental epistemological question: how do I know the things I think I know?
If I am to continue with Zen practice, I think I will spend a lot of time with my Great Doubt and consider how Zen can remain workable for me, and less time thinking about which of its claims are empirically true or empirically false. As Ford says (p. 99): "Scientific method requires that there be a possibility of falsification. But never, not even in liberal Buddhism, does one hear that if one does the practices and does not achieve liberation, then Buddhism is somehow proven false. Rather, if one does the practices without the promised experiences, most Buddhist teachers will say one has simply not done the practices correctly. This is not science," but also that "Buddhism is at its heart profoundly empirical," but also that some Zen teachers have "a whiff of cult about them." Does this book, this tradition, repeatedly contradict itself, or does it embrace a healthy nonduality of thought? Mu, I suppose.
I like hearing about James Ford's personal history, how he encountered his teachers, how he felt as he traveled down his own spiritual path. This is great and fun, he has a wry sense of humor. That said, I don't have much to say about these sections of the book.
There are so many assertions in Zen. One I come back to often, with doubt in my heart, is Ford's assertion on page 38 that "Here's a hard fact. Just sitting once a week is not a Zen practice... I think for most of us sitting a minimum of about a half an hour a day, most days of the week, is the baseline. And if you can also throw in some retreats once in a while, that's generally even better. The majority of serious Zen practitioners do more than this." The use of "hard fact" here is somewhat ambiguous (does he mean "absolutely true" or "emotionally difficult to accept"?) I find this statement, evidentially speaking, significantly harder to believe than another fact Buddhism holds dear: that I am of the nature to have ill health, get old, and die (though this one hits much harder on an emotional level). Make no mistake, this is a book about the nature of "truth", a word that appears more times in the text than suffering, dharma, and compassion combined (the find function on my pdf copy aided this count). But for all that Ford says things like (p. 89) "Anecdote doesn't replace science. If you want to claim some action causes something in the real world, don't look for a feel good book... find the studies that prove it", he doesn't seem to really apply this everywhere. And that's... largely fine, I think. okay. There are lots of true things that can never been scientifically proven, like "murder is wrong" and "I love my mom, even when she says something hurtful to me". These claims exist separate from empirical claims like "2+2=4". How then to categorize Ford's 30-minutes a day, or the significantly more mystical (p. 63) "As we push through any koan--experiencing great doubt, great faith, and great determination--we find the exact identity between our ordinary consciousness and fundamental openness"? At what level do these claims live? How literally true could they be? Or, I think a better question yet, what definitions of vast words like "self" allow us to interpret the poetry of Zen to make those statements true? I think a lot of Christians do some interesting work around their interpretation of "God" that doesn't necessarily align with the literal view of divinity found in the Bible, but nevertheless resonates with them. In one chapter, James Ford discusses how he, and other liberal Buddhists, do this kind of work with the concepts of rebirth and karma, and how they've taken on a much more psychological, metaphorical meaning, and how that redefining can also sometimes be dangerous and controversial (but sometimes quite good, like the expanded inclusivity of women in Zen). This also reflects much of what Ford brings to the precepts. Literally, we must not kill (but also, we can't not kill); literally, we must not misuse sex or drugs (but don't get any funny ideas about disengaging from these things completely as other generations and traditions of Buddhists have, because they are a valuable part of the fullness of life). And I think Ford is right! I can't say that this framing doesn't resonate with me, it really, really does. But why? Why should it resonate? I return to that fundamental epistemological question: how do I know the things I think I know?
If I am to continue with Zen practice, I think I will spend a lot of time with my Great Doubt and consider how Zen can remain workable for me, and less time thinking about which of its claims are empirically true or empirically false. As Ford says (p. 99): "Scientific method requires that there be a possibility of falsification. But never, not even in liberal Buddhism, does one hear that if one does the practices and does not achieve liberation, then Buddhism is somehow proven false. Rather, if one does the practices without the promised experiences, most Buddhist teachers will say one has simply not done the practices correctly. This is not science," but also that "Buddhism is at its heart profoundly empirical," but also that some Zen teachers have "a whiff of cult about them." Does this book, this tradition, repeatedly contradict itself, or does it embrace a healthy nonduality of thought? Mu, I suppose.
April 7, 2020
new me... "rebirth"
September 23, 2022
Probably the best of the Zen books I've read so far (which, for my own reference, are Everyday Zen: Love and Work and Taking the Path of Zen, both of which were definitely good). I borrowed this book from the library, but this is the rare type of book that makes me want to buy it, just so I can re-read passages (the "Only Don't Know" section was quite impactful for me, as I'm big into admitting I don't know anything and love the "I know that I know nothing" mindset).
I like James Ford's writing style as well -- it's more poetic, while Aitken and Beck in the other books listed above were more no-nonsense. I appreciate that approach, as it gives me a good framework logically, but Ford's writing made me feel it more in my heart than in my head. I liked this!
I like James Ford's writing style as well -- it's more poetic, while Aitken and Beck in the other books listed above were more no-nonsense. I appreciate that approach, as it gives me a good framework logically, but Ford's writing made me feel it more in my heart than in my head. I liked this!
April 8, 2018
Have you wanted to understand Zen Buddhism? Do you like books that are well-written and understandable? You will enjoy this book...and want to read it more than once.
James Ishmael Ford is a Soto Zen priest and a Unitarian Universalist minister. He also has a sense of humor and a clear writing style. I can't think of a better introduction to sitting meditation and Zen. Ford outlines his own spiritual journey while explaining the basics of Zen as well as rules for living.
I will read this book again and you should read it now.
As a bonus, it is a beautiful produced book...rounded corners and stitched binding!
James Ishmael Ford is a Soto Zen priest and a Unitarian Universalist minister. He also has a sense of humor and a clear writing style. I can't think of a better introduction to sitting meditation and Zen. Ford outlines his own spiritual journey while explaining the basics of Zen as well as rules for living.
I will read this book again and you should read it now.
As a bonus, it is a beautiful produced book...rounded corners and stitched binding!
May 30, 2017
Sit down, shut up, and pay attention
James might not be everybody's cup of tea, but he's mine. Brutally honest, heartfelt and practical as a hammer. A great intro to Zen. He will help you to sit down, shut up, and pay attention. Another of his books, Zen Master Who?, is another must-read classic to understanding modern U.S. Zen.
James might not be everybody's cup of tea, but he's mine. Brutally honest, heartfelt and practical as a hammer. A great intro to Zen. He will help you to sit down, shut up, and pay attention. Another of his books, Zen Master Who?, is another must-read classic to understanding modern U.S. Zen.
December 14, 2024
It seems to me that the author is clear about what his experience is and is not. It was a very reflective contemplative exercise seemingly with an intent to bring open ended inquiry. That hopefully leads to an opening of the heart through breaking through all that has been erected, whether real or not, to armour it. I feel that it was an honest invitation.
September 6, 2017
wow. um. I don't think I have apt words for this read.
February 11, 2018
Solid, insightful, informative book. A Zen monk's path through meditation and awareness. I keep this book close.
June 16, 2020
It has wit and wisdom blended in one. A great read.
January 13, 2014
A fine offering of spiritual insight and encouragement, of wrestling with difficult spiritual practice, from James Ishmael Ford. Zen Buddhism and Unitarian Universalism fill these pages. The electronic version is also one of the best formatted e-books I've read in the spiritual realm (yay, Wisdom House publishers!). Recommended for individual use and small spiritual groups seeking beginner's mind.
April 18, 2013
Really enjoyed this. A very thorough (and liberal/Western) take on Zen
July 19, 2016
A heartfelt, personal look at how Zen has shaped the life of the author. Discusses koan study and some of the Buddhist precepts.
Displaying 1 - 13 of 13 reviews